MASON AND SAGE

Chapter 9 ~ Sage

I'd been crying so hard, I'm still not certain how I'd made it out of Mason's house and to my apartment in one piece. Like the blinding-tears-I-can't-breathe-and-I-actually-think-I-might-be-dying kind of crying. He'd played me. He'd played me this whole time, knowing that it hadn't been just a kiss in an alley but full-on sex next to a filthy dumpster. That would be a charming story to tell the child someday. Daddy banged Mommy in an alley by a dumpster and nine months later, there you were, our little garbage man!

I stumbled into my apartment and stood in the middle of the living room, not knowing where to go, what to do, what to think. Except cry, and I clearly understood the assignment because I was a disgusting, slobbery, shuddering mess of gooey tears and other nasty shit I didn't want to think about. Unsure of what to do, I thought about my options. I wanted to call a friend so I wasn't alone while I was trying to absorb this, but I didn't want anyone around me. I wanted to talk to a friend about this, but I didn't want to tell anyone about what had happened. I wanted someone to tell me it was going to be OK, but I didn't want yet another person in my life lying to me.

In the end, I just stood there bawling, hugging a pillow from the couch to my chest, and just accepted that I might never be able to stop the tears.

My phone pinged with a text. Wiping my eyes, I saw it was from an Unknown Number, but it definitely wasn't from Unknown Skank, so I counted that as a win.

It's Mason, on my work phone since I destroyed my phone. Followed you home to make sure you got there safely. Now I'm standing outside in the hallway listening to you cry and trying not to break down your door to get to you. It's killing me to hear you in so much pain, kitten. 

Why was he still lying? Didn't liars have to give up at some point and admit they'd been caught out?

I will respect your wishes for now and stop contacting you. But that doesn't mean I won't be thinking about you every fucking minute, loving you hard and not giving up on our future together. You are my life, Sage, and I'm not going to let her lies ruin us. I'm going to prove that I did not lie to you and I am not the father of that baby. I love you forever and always.

Words. His words sounded so good, but I couldn't believe them any longer.

The next day, I met a couple of my friends for dinner after our shifts ended. I'd never felt less like going into work, but I wasn't going to let those two assholes take anything else from me. I'd given into my tears all night, my face looked like I'd suffered the worst allergic reaction ever known to man, but I'd pulled myself together and gone into work.

Taylor, another nurse practitioner, took one look at me and demanded an explanation -- after she wrapped me up in a tight hug. Our other good friend, Hannah, a doctor, came up while Taylor was squeezing the life out of me and demanded details. After giving them the barest bones, they informed me we were going out for drinks that night and I was going to spill my guts.

Something to look forward to. Not.

That evening, armed with a margarita and some of the best chips and salsa ever, I spilled my tale of lies and betrayal and watched while their jaws dropped.

"So, are you over-over?" Hannah asked. "Like there's no going back? No forgiving this fuck up?"

I shook my head. "I was just starting to sort through the alley kiss, believe him when he said it was a mistake -- and that forgiveness was about seven months in the making. And you know what? I still wasn't there with the trust all the way. Rightfully so, as it turned out. But this? He fathered a baby with her after telling me, assuring me, promising me that nothing more than a kiss had happened that night. I was not all right with the damn kiss even happening, but now that I know his D had...wandered across state lines, so to speak? Gross. No way. Some lies you can't come back from and this is one of them."