CLOSER || EDDIE MUNSON

Part 3

I walked in to school the next day with purpose. After thinking about it last night, I realized I needed to make Eddie pay. I was sick and tired of his annoying voice commenting something about me every time he saw me.
He needed to get the hint.
I was tired of people laughing, tired of the accusations, tired of Eddie and his sick games. I was tired of being hurt by him. I was tired of the way he messed with my head. I was tired of the racing thoughts he would leave in my mind each time I saw him. I'm not someone he could just do that to. But he was going to learn that in due time.
I walked over to my locker and put in the combination, placing my cheer bag inside and shutting it behind me. Then the bell rung. I was late. I was late to a class with Eddie. I knew as soon as I walked in he would say something, but I was ready this time. I felt fire coursing through my veins. Eddie had messed with the wrong person.
I walked towards my math class, steps loudly echoing through the hallway.
I reached the door and knocked harder than I meant to, feeling like this made me reckless.
It gave me a new drive, thinking of how I cried in the classroom, thinking of how he kept me up at night wondering, thinking of the words he said.

How many players of the basketball team have you fucked?

"Ahem, Ms. Y/n. You're late, hurry and find your seat. You're lucky I don't tell your coach about this."

Normally this would've embarrassed me but I was too distracted by the fact that Eddie was staring at me. He had a different expression than usual. I couldn't place it, but it wasn't the teasing mean look he normally gave me. To my surprise, he had nothing to say either. I looked away and walked into the class, taking my seat towards the front.
Once again, Eddie Munson had gotten into my head.
Though in some form of a miracle, I was able to not think about him for the rest of that class. I was more focused on my work. In order to stay in cheer I had to keep up my grades. It felt nice to have a distraction like this, but it didn't last very long. I saw him leave class as it ended. Seeing the way he walked with such arrogance, yelling at his friends, it ignited something in me.
The anger came flooding back, it flowed through my veins.
I quickly grabbed my stuff and left before it got any worse. I was already fired up, there was no telling when I would explode.
I walked down the hallway, trying to keep myself in check. I still wanted to be angry with Eddie of course, I couldn't lose the determination and drive it gave me. Then again, I didn't want to be so angry that I couldn't think straight.
This was a nice chance of pace. Instead of constantly questioning myself I was just upset. A single emotion. No confusion, no anxiety. Just anger.
I liked it, I wasn't thinking about everything he did or said, how it affected me, or why it hurt.
All of it was gone. Just pure hatred and determination.
If I was being entirely honest though, occasionally I still thought about everything. I learned how to redirect but the feelings always surfaced at some point. And I still felt that sort of longing. I had no idea what for and I hated it. I didn't want to feel like this, I just wanted things to go back to how they were.
Stupid little comments that did nothing, and stupid little feelings of annoyance.
It had clearly turned into something bigger though. It all happened in a night too, which only confused me more. I hadn't had any issues the entire year but that all changed in less than 24 hours.
I didn't like thinking about it. It made me feel numb like I did in the classroom. It stopped hurting as much as it did then though. I think the pain turned into the anger I had. That anger had just disappeared though. It melted away as my mind was plagued with the same questioning thoughts. Any time my mind wandered close to the topic, it would be the only thing I could think of. It was a very repetitive cycle. I hated how it was the only thing on my mind Though it was tiring trying to figure things out, I knew I needed to find the source of the issue. It was obviously Eddie but there was also something else, I just couldn't weed it out.
That's why I was so mad at him. He did this to me. He fueled every single one of those thoughts.
I was now halfway through my next class, one that he wasn't in. Even still, I couldn't get him out of my head. It's like an itch you can't scratch. That's why I needed payback. If I got payback I would finally have a moment of rest. I was excited for it, I could go back to how things were before Eddie came around. As quickly as the anxious thoughts came, they left. I was reminded of what I was supposed to be doing today.