State Files

California [headcanons & incorrect quotes]

Tws: warning in advanced there will be swearing cause there's, always swearing

California is Florida's younger brother, and Spain is their dad. Which is,, natural given that they're bros, but uh! In case it wasn't obvious, there you go!

Cali's younger by around 5 years and he's pissed about it 3:<

Both Florida and California make jokes about Spain leaving them, and every time they make one, the two of them are giggling while almost everyone else in the room stares at them in concern.

California refuses to sleep often, claiming that "states don't need sleep" and everyone is just so confused as to why he doesn't want to sleep.

He's passed out in a meeting, cause at the time his state was experiencing a drought and the combined heat and dryness caused him to pass out. New York carried him back to his room so Cali could get some rest for once. 

After Cali woke up DC lectured him on "being responsible", his exact words being "look i know we disagree but you still have to pay attention during meetings" 

He is,, really really good at singing!?!? and normally he doesn't sing around people, but one time New York walked in on him singing :3

Florida, Louisiana, and California often hang out at night, just laying on the floor and talking about whatever interests them. The very first time all 3 of them hung out it was cause Cali overheard Florida talking about neoprns and was like "YOU KNOW WHAT THOSE ARE?!??"

Anytime Cali's gotten super sick or passed out, New York helps him in some way- mainly by catching Cali if he tripped or smth, and making sure no states bother California whilst he's sick [as much as that annoys Florida, after all, "Im his big brother let me see him!?"]

California has punched Texas, at least once, and has punched DC at least twice. In his defense, they deserved it.

Continuing on that note, California [with florida's help] has ducttaped texas to a wall before, DC yelled at both of them.

moving on to the incorrect quotes!

California: I have been tricked, I have been backstabbed, and I have quite possibly been bamboozled.

*Florida and California looking at a locked gate into a park*
Florida: Aw. :(
California: You know what they say.
Florida: Please don't-
California: BE GAY DO CRIME! *hops gate*
Florida: Frick-

California: *makes Florida a cup of tea but puts salt in it*
Florida: *sips tea*
California:
Florida: *finishes tea*
California: Didn't it taste bad?
Florida: Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.
California, tearing up: Oh, okay.

Louisiana: Self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath or putting on a lot of make up if you like that, or taking a nice warm nap and stuff like that basically.
California: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you. self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists. self care is the fear in your enemies eyes.
Florida: Self care is stealing someones birthday cake just to eat the frosting.
California: If you touch my birthday cake I'll make you eat your hands.

California: If I had a face like yours, I'd put it on a wall and throw a brick at it.
Florida: If I had a face like YOURS, I'd put it on a brick and throw a wall at it.

Florida: Are you ever going to listen to me?
California: Yes. Absolutely.
Florida: When?
California: When you're right.

California: My expectations were low but holy fuck.

New York: Wake me up-
Florida: Before you go go
Louisiana: When September ends
California: WAKE ME UP INSIDE

California: Florida isn't answering my messages.
Louisiana: Allow me.
California: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi-
Florida: *replying to message* Hey Louie!!