Christmas past to present!

4-Visting

"So now you've heard a bit about what about you? What have you been up to?" I ask as we walk down the street.

"20 Questions?" He offers

"Deal. You first lets see. What do you do for a living?"

"I bought out ted Parker for the diner four years ago." 

"I hadn't heard he'd sold."

"He was ready to retire, and i was looking for a place. It worked out. My turn. What do you miss about home the most?" He asks, and I look at him. 

"Wow; right in on the hard ones." I chuckle, and he shrugs. "Well, I guess I miss knowing my neighbors. It's not really the same back home. I mean, my barista knows my name, but that mostly because i'm a great tipper, not because he actually cares. That and he enjoys staring at my boobs." I answer as he about chokes on his scone. I can't help but laugh. "Next question What happened with Shanna?" If he could ask tough questions, so could I. he clears his throat.

"Oh, a hard one touche. Well, after dating a year and quiet a bit of nagging, we got engaged. A few months later we married and that was sort of the beginning of the end for us."

"You were married for a few years, though, right?" He nods 

"After the first few months, we found out she was pregnant."

"You're a dad?" I interrupt shocked.

"Yes, but I believe that was your forth question. I'm a bit behind now." He chuckles, and I Shrug

"What can I say? I'm a curious person." He laughs back."Alright then, let's have it."

"What happened with your husband? What was his name again? Dale?

"That's two. His name is Dylan. And it isn't really that complicated. He just found he wasn't in love with me anymore." I answer, looking straight ahead.

"That's awful." He says quietly. 

"People keep saying that, and I've always felt weird about that. it's not until now that I think that I realize why." I tell him still not looking at him.

"Why is that?" 

"Well, looking back, I was never heartbroken. I was sad, but if I had been truly in love with him, wouldn't I have felt it? The immense pain? Shortness of breath? but I didn't. " I admit out loud to Keaton of all people. Before he can say anything, my phone rings. I pull it out and check the caller ID. "Just a second." I tell him before answering  

"Hello? Holly?" Dylan checks

"Hey."

"I was just calling to talk to the kids." He tells me. 

"Remember when I asked you to text before you call?" 

"I did. You didn't answer."

"That's because I was busy."

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to talk to them. I'm not used to them being so far away."

"I get it. i'm sorry, but i am not with them."

"What the fuck do you mean your not with them? you fly them out of here and just leave them with people they don't know..."

"Dylan!" I shout and he stops. "They are with my parents! They are safe and happy. I ran to the store and ended up getting a quick coffee with a friend. you are out of line." I scold.

"a Friend?"

"Yes a friend."

"Is it him?" He asks and that makes me pause. 

"Him?"

"That ex." again i'm surprised.

"Yes. I ran into Keaton at the store and we just got talking."

"I see I'll call again later then." 

"Sounds good."

"Bye holly." he says and hangs up.

"Sorry about that." I Apologize to  Keaton.

"He knows about me?" He asks

"Oh that is a question and I believe its my turn again." 

"Oh alright go for it."

"How old is your kid?"

"Her name is Maddy and she is 3." 

"Cute."

"My turn. How does Dylan now about me?" I had wanted him to move on but not so lucky.

"Why wouldn't he?" I say and he jut looks at me. I sigh and start to walk again. "Aside form Dylan you were really the only other serious relationship I'd ever had. Of course we talked about our past, our heart break, and pain." I answer honestly. I can feel his eyes on me but I don't dare turn to face him.

"Holly." He says I don't answer. "Holly. You know why I did it right?" 

"It's not your turn." I try holding in the tears at the edge of my eyes. 

"I don't give a damn about the game. I need to know that you understand why I let you go?" A lump catches in my throat.

"The why has never interested me."

"No it is important! God damn it Holly! Has it been almost ten years with you not knowing?" He breaths out loud and moves to stand in front of me. "I let you go. Yes that is true. I never wanted to do that; but I had to. You had goals. You had dreams. Ones way bigger than what I could give you. You have to believe me. If I could I would have given you everything. I have always wanted to have you." He tells me and surprising me he pulls me to him and plants his lips onto mine. 

I fall into the kiss. Remembering the taste of him from all those years ago. The pure comfort I'd always felt for him pressed to me. The same yet different as his strong arms wrapped around me. I kissed him back and I feel more at home then I have in years. All of a sudden I remember what we where talking about. Pulling off of him I bite my lip and back away. 

"All these years and you still make my head spin." I breath. "I am not a ditsy brained teenager anymore." I tell him and decide then that I need to leave. "I need to go. Thanks for the coffee. it was nice visiting. I'll see you around." i tell him and move to leave.

"Wait holly..." He tries.

"No. I can't do this. I need to go." I almost shout leaving him there. As I speed back to the store and jump in the truck. How can I have let him that close? That kiss. I  would be paying for that kiss for a long time. He let me go to give me more? How did that make any sense? Pulling out of the parking lot I catch him staring from his truck. He looked sad. 

Walking into the house groceries in hand. I find the kids in the kitchen baking with mother. laughing and giggling. My favorite sound in the world. 

"We were worried you got lost out there." my father says taking some of the bags from me. 

"Sorry about that I stopped for coffee and got talking. How has everything been here?" I ask kissing both of children on the cheeks.

"Granny said we could make Christmas cookies for santa.' Claire tells me.

"Oh what a great idea. What do you say to granny?"

"Thank you granny." They both grin. 

"Your daddy called while I was out. How about we call him back before bed?"

"okay mama." Daniel agrees "Wanna help us decorate cookies?" he offers taking my hand. 

"Yes. Thank you for asking." I kiss his head and find a spot next to him.