Chasing Suicide (BXB)

Chapter Fourteen ♡

I picked up the phone quickly. It had to be Aster, why else would they be calling me? "Hello?"

"Hi, Jude Hayez?"

"Yes that's me." I answered a little too fast.

"Do you know Aster Jameson?" Her voice stuttered through the phone with forced confidence.

I ignored the 'Jameson' part. It peaked a slight interest for less than a second, but I was instantly brought back to feelings of concern. "Yeah is he there?"

"Yes, there was an.. Accident. Carl Wilson is here and he informed me to call you over."

I was already out the door, jumping in my car, and pulling out of my parking spot as quick as I could, "Alright. I'll be there soon. Can you give me any information about Aster? I'm his guardian currently."

I heard her whisper something away from the phone then she replied to me, "No I'm sorry. I'm not supposed to give out that information unless you're his legal family."

Well, I wasn't illegal. But I wasn't family either. I did have paper work filed at home stating that I was taking care of him but I figured I could deal with that when I got there.

I said thanks and hung up. I was driving as fast as I could without getting pulled over, and I even ran a few lights. But screw it. I soon pulled into the hospital parking lot and jumped out of my car not even caring about locking it, and ran inside the closest door.

I was met by the familiar smell of medicine and sterilization. I really did hate hospitals. The walls were pale, the clothes were pale. And everything looked sanitized, even though it was probably more dirty than any other place.

I walked up to the information desk. Before I could talk to the nurse I felt an arm on my shoulder. It was Wilson. I wasn't entirely happy to see him. Actually, I wasn't at all. I was still mad about this morning. And I couldn't shake the feeling that this had something to do with Aster disappearing and somehow ending up in the hospital.

"Jude. I'm sorry."

I looked up, his face ... looked sad? His lips were pursed as if he was trying to check his emotions.

What was going on..

I wasn't much of a crier, in fact, I rarely cried, but my eyes started to tear up."W-what happened?" I was stuttering over my words, assuming the worst after seeing my boss's face.

A nurse came up and took the place of Mr. Wilson, "Aster is in the emergency room, we're not sure if he's going to make it. His injuries are possibly fatal."

I couldn't breathe. I wasn't sobbing but my eyes wouldn't stop leaking.

Then I got angry, really angry, "Well what the fuck happened? Let me see him!"

I tried to push past the nurse, I was frantic and I just wanted to see Aster. I wanted to see his delicate face again. His golden eyes. His silky hair. I wanted to hold him. I needed to know if he was okay.

They didn't let me. Mr. Wilson was surprisingly strong. He pulled me back despite my protests, "Let me go! Please!" then I started to sob.

Fuck "being a man". Fuck having to stay strong for everyone. Who gives a shit if I cried.

The nurse came up and hugged me tight.

I was crying. Hard. My eyes were burning, my heart was was aching, and nobody even knew why.

I was in love with Aster. I loved him. I wanted him to be with me forever. I wanted to grow old with him. He couldn't leave me. He couldn't leave this world, I wouldn't let him.