Don't Fall for Me, My Fake Lover

FORTY EIGHT - I was worried for his life

DON’T FALL FOR ME MY FAKE LOVER by: Avaritico

FORTY EIGHT – I was worried for his life

Blood is dripping from Lee’s head. His eyes are closed. His hand feels so cold and his breathing stopped. He is no longer with us. He looks so peaceful, so charming yet he is already lifeless.

I look at Carlo who does not look at me directly. “I’m sorry Cassie, If only I had been a minute earlier, I could have saved him.”

Tears run own my face as I hold the lifeless body of the one I love. If only I had been sane as to accept him without even thinking about the stupid race. If only I had admitted that I love him from the start, he might have been alive still.

I hold his lifeless body in the middle of the cave crying for him to come back. It is entirely fault. If I have not insisted in joining the race, I might not have been kidnapped and they won’t need to rescue me.

Lee died because of me. I killed the one I love. I killed Lee.

Rivers of tears flow from my eye hugging his no longer breathing body. I can longer feel the warmth of that had once encapsulated me. I can no longer feel the strength of the arms that have once captured me, the same arms that pulled me closer to him. His body was with me but I can no longer feel him.

Love indeed hurts. And for me it hurts more because I was not able to tell him I love him. I regret not telling him I love him when he asked me. I regret pushing him away. I regret not kissing him as much as I have wanted to when he was still alive.

I look at his serene face and kiss him on the lips but there is nothing in that kiss anymore. “I love you,” I say but I know it can do nothing more to help him. It is after all the real life and no magical kiss can bring him back. He did not bite any poison apple, not cursed by any witch, and I am no princess.  But even then, I say it repeatedly. “I love you.”

I close my eyes hoping that when I open it everything will clear up. I wish that everything will be back to normal: the Lee will be there telling me he loves me. I wish that he will be there giving me flowers and chocolates. And when that happens, I will accept them and tell him I love him. I wish I could change everything.

I feel something on my face and when I open my eyes I feel a drop of tear fall to the side of my face. Everything is blurry but I can see the silhouette of Dee now standing. I feel her hold my hands and that made me cry again. I remember that I can no longer hold Lee’s hands.

“Stay strong Cassie,” she says kissing me on the cheek.

“It is all my fault,” I say in broken words. I start sobbing and warm fluids again flooded my eyes. “Lee died because he came to save me. It should have been me who’s dead.”

“Lee is not dead,” she says comforting me but I knew what I saw. Lee had been lifeless in my arms for so long a time that I had been familiar with the coldness of his body. I wish he is still alive; I wanted to believe that he was alive, but I know he was dead.