Avoiding The Male Lead-2

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All the friends who Jaehyun had come in contact with said that something wasn’t too right with him these days, and those problems were reflected in his mood.

It seemed that Jaehyun who had always been very good with his work was getting more and more irritable recently.

That’s right, Jaehyun himself also felt strangely irritated. It was that kind of irritability that you would never get rid of without getting a holiday to calm yourself down.

He had been working on a design for a full month without any developments. The scrapped sketches were piling up like a mountain. Jaehyun was even at the point of wanting to use cigarettes and alcohol to ease the irritability he could not get rid of.

He was so troubled that his designing wouldn’t go smoothly.

Jaehyu  gulped down a mouthful of wine and said to his childhood friend, Liu Ying, “Do you think my well is finally running dry?”

All his old inspirations that made him proud seemed to have disappeared in a flash. Now, he doubted himself with every single stroke, and the half-ruined products that came out were hardly worth his time.

It was annoying, and it bothered him.

Liu Ying nearly spat out his wine. He wiped his mouth and said, “Hey man, cut the rest of the world some slack. If a divine being like you has a dried-up well then what about everyone else? Do they not need to live then?”

Jaehyun sighed and did not answer.

After observing his expression, Liu Ying said, “If you ask me, I think it’s ‘cause you’re being too demanding of this project. That’s why you’re looking down on your own work.”

“Hmph. It’s a pity I don’t even have a full draft for my design.”

Liu Ying saw how gloomy he was, he widened his eyes a bit and pretended to ask casually, “Hey, great prince Jeon, it’s rare for you to be so bothered about something. You’re not nursing a broken heart, are you?”

“Why would I…” But half way through trying to refute, Jaehyun suddenly stopped.

Liu Ying grinned. “Look! I thought it was weird the last time you called me! A woman who can trouble you so much, and now she’s stolen your soul too! Quickly tell me, who is it? I heard from someone that she’s a dancer. Couldn’t be that one, right? Heard she’s quite pretty too…”

“She’s dead.” Jaehyun suddenly said while seeing him happily chattering away beside him.

Liu Ying couldn’t react to it for a moment. “What?”

“She’s dead.” He calmly repeated himself. But he himself knew that his heart hollowed out when he told him that cruel reality. His eyes felt hot and there was almost a choking sensation bubbling up inside his throat.

She’s dead.

Yeah. She died.

He wanted to get her to stay, but before he could do anything, she was gone.

Liu Ying saw how off he looked and pushed him. “Hey, you’re joking, right?”

Jaehyun smiled bitterly. “I really wish I was.”

Liu Ying didn’t know what to say anymore. “How could it be…so sudden?”

Jaehyun said, “Maybe it’s just fate.”

Liu Ying finally understood that Jaehyun must miss her very much. “Look at you, don’t be so sad. What’s gone is gone, but you still have to go on!”

“I know.”

“You should take a vacation. I’m sure you’ll forget it with time.”

Jaehyun smiled but did not comment.

How long, how many years would it take to forget a person? She left so freely, so unencumbered, so what was he to do?

He just hated that he didn’t confess sooner! Maybe if he did, then she might never think about going back to that place. Maybe if he did, she’d call and tell him before she left, and naturally he would’ve stopped her. He wouldn’t have let her go. If he confessed, then she could be alive right now.

Jaehyun thought that as long as someone was alive, it didn’t matter even if they were thinking of someone else, because he would still protect her.

But she wouldn’t even give him that chance.

The person he once loved would never appear before him again in this lifetime.

He tried to ease his sorrows with alcohol, but that only made things worse.

After going back, he looked at his dark and empty room. He turned on the lights and then the TV. There, a beautiful woman danced concentratedly on the large LCD screen.

Each one of her sweet smiles seemed to dissolve into tears in his drunken daze.

She was a person full of resilience and perseverance. Even if she was tired, even if she cried, she would still rather carry her burdens all by herself.

Even if he wanted to help her she would never take the initiative to hold out her hand.

Jaehyun felt that he was a disappointment. He had never experienced this in his entire life.

Perhaps he was wrong to have been so self-confident in his feelings.

Love wasn’t something you could get just by waiting.

If you loved someone, you had to work to seize the opportunity. Otherwise, the chance will never come again.

He had lost her.

And she would never come back.

“Xin Lisa, I wish you happiness as well. To you who gave me all these feelings, I hope you can find him. As for me, I’ll continue my life in this world, going back to the old days until the person who’s fated for me appears. And when she shows up, she’ll help me forget about all the pain and sadness you’ve caused me.”