It Also Happens To Alphas

Chapter 5

When Derek blinked his eyes open after a long night filled with painful memories and very little sleep, it was to the sound of someone puttering around in the kitchen.

For a moment, Derek just lay still, allowing himself to slowly become aware of his surroundings.

He wasn't in New York City anymore and the bone-deep exhaustion in his body was a phantom ache, one that usually accompanied his nightmares.

There were dried tear tracks on his face and Derek winced, hoping he hadn't been too loud and disturbed his child's sleep.

He got up and walked into the bathroom, deciding that a quick hot shower was going to relieve the ache in his bones.

The water felt amazing on his tense shoulders and Derek took a moment to appreciate the water pressure in his new home, a far cry from the rusty showers he'd had to make do with in New York City.

Small things.

Derek was going to appreciate the small things, hopeful that, one day, a multitude of small things would overpower the big bad that was still lurking in the back of his mind.

When he entered the kitchen fifteen minutes later, Caleb was just putting the finishing touches on their breakfast, consisting of coffee, cocoa, and pancakes covered in very generous amounts of syrup.

It was their comfort breakfast.

Derek's heart squeezed painfully and he tried to smile encouragingly when he felt his son's searching gaze on him. 

"Did you sleep well, Papa?"

It was a question, technically, but the expression on Caleb's face told Derek that his little boy knew the answer already.

"I have slept better," Derek said after a moment of deliberation.

He didn't want to make his child worry, but he also didn't want to lie to him.

There had been too much deceit in their lives already and Caleb in particular had been lied to enough for a lifetime.

Caleb tried to smile and Derek sat down and opened his arms, allowing his son to climb on his lap.

"Thank you for making breakfast, little bear," he told him, pressing a kiss to his hair.

"You're welcome, Papa," Caleb replied, his words a little muffled because his thumb was once again stuck in his mouth.

"Hey," Derek said gently, tapping Caleb's chin to make him look at him.

"Today is going to be a good day, okay?"

"Yes, Papa," Caleb replied after a little pause and Derek smiled at him, a genuine smile that finally made his son relax.

The night clearly hadn't been good for either of them, filled with too many tears and too vivid nightmares.

Sadly, the nightmare wasn't quite over yet.

Sure, they'd left a lot of it behind in New York City, but the pain was etched deeply into their hearts and minds, accompanying them wherever they went.

The past was an aching wound deep inside Derek's chest, as if a bomb had smashed into his heart and left behind a smoking crater.

It was an appropriate image, Derek thought, given that bombs were weapons of war and Derek had been trapped in a warzone for almost a decade.

However, as he sat in the kitchen of his very own home, with the sun shining into the room, the smell of pancakes in the air, and his little boy at his side, Derek imagined a balm being spread over the ache.