Bughead || recovering

5

I stayed in my room the next couple of days
Feeling so , exposed and transparent , how someone could just look right through me .
Jughead texted me at least a million times , and left me letters every morning , and would occasionally knock on my window for my attention,
Eventually I had to go back to school
wishing I could stay in my room for another year.
It was lunch and veronica walked up to me
"I heard what happened" "what are you talking about"
"I get why you wouldn't want to tell me"
"Give me one second" I said as I walked to the cafeteria to see him not there
So I went to the yard , seeing him sitting at one of the tables , alone
I walked up to him and he stared at me for a second before he stood up
I repeatedly punched him while I mumbled words
I don't think they hurt because he just stood there
Eventually I got tired and just stood there and slightly cried into his shirt
"I hate you" "I know" "you pressured me into saying something that I promised myself I'd take to my grave" "I know , I'm sorry" "and you told people"
"I only told Archie" "and he told Veronica" "Veronica won't tell anyone"
"I don't want to be you're friend anymore" "we can work past this"
"You can work past this because you were the one who did it  but I- I just can't and I won't"
It's been two weeks
Me and jughead haven't spoken , at all
It's been okay , I started talking to someone , his names Jason ,
He said he's gonna take me out today.
It was later on and he took me to pops , not to exciting , and I felt
Like I wanted to disappear when you know who walked through the door
He sat with his table and I noticed him look at me a few times until he got up and
Walked over to me "betty can we talk" "about what" "just come" he said as he grabbed my arm and lead me outside "I know you hate me and you have every reason to" , I nodded
"But listen he doesn't have good intentions" , I scoffed "are you jealous"
"Me? Jealous? No." "Do you have like a little crush on me or something"
"We both know I don't" "maybe that's why you were so mad that I didn't want to kiss you"
"I'm just telling you" "you don't have to worry about me"
"Yeah but I do" "I'll see you around jughead" I said before I walked back in
"What was that" "oh nothing , we're just science partners and he was asking me about our project " he nodded ,
we were in my room , and I assumed he was gonna leave soon
"Do you think I could sleepover" I didn't really want to say yes , but I would feel bad
"Um , sure , the guest rooms just down the haul"
"I didn't mean In the guest room , I meant in here"
"Why in here" "you know why"
"I just want it to be crystal clear , I don't want to have sex with you"
"Glad we're on the same page"
"Great, well you can sleep on the right side and I can sleep on the left"
He nodded,
The next morning he left with out saying a word ,
I got ready for school because I was almost late , 
I felt like everyone was looking at me , when suddenly Veronica grabbed my hand and
Pulled me into the bathroom "have you checked Instagram"
"No why" she showed me her phone and it was a picture of me with some syrup looking
Thing on my face" "sticky maples? Those still exist?"
"Sadly" , the weirdest part was that it was a picture of me sleeping , last night.
Well aware who did it I walked out the bathroom and walked around the hall and I saw him , surrounded by a group of people , he looked so proud.
And then I saw jughead , I was to far to see what they said to each other
But I saw jughead holding his phone up to his face witch lead to a small argument and then a
Large fist fight , the second there's a fight everyone goes running like someone just dropped
A million dollars, I stood there and watched to see who'd win at least
When it sort of ended Jason was laying on the floor, I think he had passed out.
And then jughead looked up at me . Right before I walked away,
He followed me to my car I didn't say anything , I felt like if I did I would break down
I unlocked my car and sat there for a moment right before he opened the passenger door and sat down , I looked at him for a second before I grabbed a tissue "your nose is bleeding"
"Thanks" we sat there for a moment, "so what , did you come here for ,
to tell me I told you so?" "I know that it seems like the most surprising thing in the world
That someone can actually care about you but I do"
"You don't even know me" "then let me"
"Seriously what are you getting from this ? Does this make you feel like any more
Of a good person or something? Does this make you feel good about yourself"
"In most cases after talking to you I feel worse about myself so no , not really"
"I told you why I don't want you close to me" "what because your suicidal ?
So is everyone else in this school , you're just the only one who
Isn't living you're life because of it"
"All those other narcissistic wouldn't do half the shit I have
Just because they dread there life doesn't mean they'd ever actually end it"
"The world isn't out to get you betty"
We sat there for a bit trying to figure out what to say
"I didn't even sleep with him like that you know" , he nodded
"You probably don't believe me , and I blame you, i never even kissed him"
"Why'd you feel so comfortable letting him in you're life"
"I thought I could try to be normal , push myself to the edge, i didn't like him
Not in the slightest , I've already destroyed my life so what's the harm in messing around with someone" and it went quiet again
"The truth is , I want to be you're friend , I really do
But I Couldn't imagine doing that to you"
"You don't have to , just give me a chance at least , and maybe your life won't be so dreadful
You don't have to completely give up on yourself just because you had a rough year or two"
"There's so much I want to say to you , but I don't know we're to start"
"You don't have to say anything"
He held out his hand "friends?" I nodded and I shook his hand