Caffeine Withdrawals: An Unspoken Collaboration

Drawing Beautiful

1. 

That silent scream,  

Through your head. 

Those people with no words,  

Who wish for the end.  

But leave you to find,  

Tears in your eyes.

Those nasty jeers,  

And horrible names.  

Leave you upset,  

At their harsh games.  

While your head is left,  

To silently scream.

Pain flooding through,  

Every inch of your body.  

As strong fists collide, 

What can you do. 

Stuck in a corner,  

Hoping it will end.

That silent scream,  

Your fears take over.  

But stand up for yourself,  

For you,  

Are your own lucky clover.

2. 

Each laugh and each smile, 

So fake all the while.

Trying to keep the pain hidden,  

Locked away and forbidden.

From them not from you,  

The pain is so fresh and so new.

A new kind of a pain,  

Looked down upon with distain.

You can make it go away,  

Is today the day?

It's kept safe and out of sight,  

Not touching it takes all your might.

Needing to feel the relief that it brings,  

With each touch your soul sings.

But no, today is not the day,  

For you will no longer play this game.

For you are a fighter,  

With a future much brighter.

There's no doubt it'll be tough,  

But today, today is enough.

Today you take back your life,  

Ridding yourself of that blade or that knife.

Inside you are stronger,  

With hope that lasts longer.

And remember my friend,  

You are not alone, and this is not the end.

3. 

A lot of people hear the phrase 'self-harm' and jump to conclusions about the sort of person who would hurt their own body; emo, suicidal, attention seeking. Because isn't that what it is, a social outcast who hopes by having and following through with suicidal thoughts will achieve a great amount of attention?  

It's funny how many don't fall into a single one of those categories and yet brings damage upon their own bodies. These people look and act like everybody else, they smile all the time and laugh more than anyone else. They're happy. They're normal. But nobody see's the thoughts that clouded their minds, the thoughts that keep them restless at night and tired during the days.  

Those around them may see the scars, may see the fresh new cuts, but since these people are normal they can't possibly have been caused by them, oh no, of course not. That is after all, the opposite of normal. The scars covering their arms must be from something else, something stupid, like falling out of a treehouse. The bracelets they wear are not to cover the multiple scars covering their wrists, they're worn as another way of them rebelling against the school uniform they're forced to wear. Them pushing themselves to their physical limit, is not too too cause physical pain in order to numb the mental pain, it's their way of getting healthier and becoming the best.  

Nobody sees what harm these people do when they're alone, how some take a blade and run it against their skin, enjoying how, for a split second, the pain fades and is replaced by something else, or how the feel of the smooth blade slicing their skin makes them feel something when usually they feel nothing. Some take to alcohol or drugs, abusing them to numb the pain they feel, others push their bodies to the limits, only stopping when they physically can't go on, wanting to block the constant thoughts for as long as possible. The rest find other ways to help them cope, not eating, eating too much before empty the contents of their stomachs, burning, piercing, bruising their skin. 

Each one of these people share one thing in common. Surrounded by friends and family and yet they feel so alone, as if the world's against them. But this can not be further from the truth, as they are not alone in this world, there are so many others struggling to cope just like they do. Together they can learn to cope. Learn to deal with the pain, the feeling of bring numb, the anger, the hurt, and everything else. As long as they remember that they are not alone, and this is not how they have to live their lives, they can control their inner monsters.