In Memoriam - An AJR Fic (Everything Clicks - Book 2)

Birthday Party (404 - ERR[/OR)

"Okay, you can open your eyes now."

"...A bar?"

"Yeah! Happy Birthday!"

A giddy smile spread across Ryan's face as he sat across from me in the restaurant booth. I waited for the punchline, for something more to happen, but it seemed there was nothing else. He slumped slightly in his seat when he saw my reaction and sighed with frustration.

"Look...I know it isn't what we'd normally do. But today's a special day and I wanted to do something out of the ordinary to celebrate. These past few months have been hard for us...I wish we could go to a fancy Italian place or something, but-"

"No, no. I'm glad we could do something," I smiled. "Let's face it, I'd have been moping around the hotel room if you hadn't dragged me out."

Ryan smirked as he shook his head. "You're young yet. You can live a little."

"Look who's talking, kiddo."

"Hey! I'm not that much younger than you!"

We chuckled and listened to the sounds of sports playing on every television in the building. It wasn't interesting, but at least it wasn't silent. Ryan seemed down.

"...He would've been 20 just a few days ago," Ryan muttered dismally.

"Do we have to do this now?"

"We don't have to dwell on it, I'm just stating a fact," Ryan replied with a sigh. "I just...I feel like we should celebrate him too. Since he isn't here anymore."

I took a moment to think about it. As much as I wanted to leave the past in the past, maybe it was the right thing to do. For his sake.

"You're right...maybe we should."

"I can be right sometimes too, you know."

I ordered drinks for both of us. We sat patiently until they arrived. I looked to Ryan and lifted my arm in a toast.

"To Jack," I began, struggling to find my next words. I tried my damndest to hold back tears.

"Even though it's my 27th, I can't really think about myself today. You're supposed to be next to us. Celebrating with us. But...hell, we don't know where you are now. It's been tough trying to keep up the fight without you. But I know that you'd want us to keep going. So...for you, that's what we'll do. And I hope that we make you proud."

Ryan sniffled as he whispered a quiet "Here, here" and clinked his glass with mine.

I took a sip and stared at the corner of the table. I felt tuned out from everything. All of the noise from the bar suddenly went quiet. I felt alone; I didn't feel like I was in a building full of people. Where was I? What was I doing? What was happening?

"Adam? Is everything okay?"

I glanced across the table to see Ryan watching me with concern.

I shook my head. "...He should be here...he should be with us."

"I know," Ryan mumbled. "I know..."

I felt the tears begin to roll down my face. "W...Why didn't we save him?"

"Was there anything we could do? We were in danger, Adam. We thought he was dead and we almost joined him."

"Was he dead?! Did we know that?!"

Ryan sighed. "He wasn't breathing-"

"We still could've had a chance at saving him. If we were quick enough and got him off the train in time-"

"Adam, we wouldn't have been quick enough," Ryan declared. He looked me in the eye blankly. "By the time we got out of there, he would've been gone. No one, not even the best doctor in the world, could've helped him! There's nothing we could've done."

I was hyperventilating. I felt lightheaded and weak. I took a deep breath and fell back in my seat. People were staring at me from all over the restaurant. I could feel my face turning red with embarrassment.

"...I'm sorry," I blurted after a minute.

Ryan shook his head. "Don't be. I honestly didn't think you were that passionate about it all."

I chuckled slightly. "Do I really come off that way?"

"Sometimes it's not necessarily a bad thing not to be."

I sat with my own thoughts for a little while and took a few deep breaths as everything came back into focus. I could hear the sounds from the bar again. Things seemed okay. In the corner of my peripheral, I could see Ryan intensely looking over my shoulder at something behind me. He then turned back to me, his face devoid of all color.

"We need to leave."

"What? We just got here."

"Adam, trust me. We are in danger."

"Ryan, what the fuck are you talking about?"

"Look behind you. Carefully. Don't make it obvious."

I acted like I was looking at one of the television screens by the bar and turned to look behind me. My eyes widened and shock filled my body.

Sitting behind me at the bar was a man. He sat upright, his gaze locked on the opposite wall. He had short hair, a grey shirt, and camouflage pants. I recognized him all too well.

"...Christ," I whispered. I looked back at Ryan with fear.

"You thought I was kidding," He replied.

"Now I don't."

Without saying another word, I took out my wallet and put more than enough cash to cover our bill on the table. We kept our eyes fixed in the opposite direction and sprinted out the door into the night, hoping we weren't being followed. We ran to the corner of the building to catch our breath and our thoughts.

"How? How is he here?!" I snapped.

"I have...no idea..." Ryan muttered, shaking his head.

"You saw him at the hotel..."

"I think that was just...a hallucination, or something. The only person there was the janitor."

"But he was just at the bar, how do we know he wasn't at the hotel, too?"

"I...I don't know."

I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. Ryan began pacing back and forth on the sidewalk.

"I'm...I'm terrified." I confided.

"I know," Ryan agreed. "Me too."

"I told you that I wouldn't let him find us, but..."

"We'll figure something out," Ryan stated. "We always do."

At that moment, the door of the bar opened. A man with short hair and wearing a grey shirt and hunting pants exited. He looked our way and gave a quick wave before continuing down the sidewalk toward his car. Ryan and I stood frozen, and I struggled to find words.

"That...That's...That's not him-"

"No..." Ryan looked horrified.

"...But...we both saw him...?"

"I have no idea what's going on."

"I don't either."

Ryan looked around the area. "We should go, in case something bad does happen."

"Good thinking."

We sat on the curb and waited for a taxi to drive by. It felt almost like...deja vu. For the first time in three months, I trusted myself with a taxi.

"Sorry your birthday got ruined..." Ryan atoned. "Well, both of your birthdays."

I chuckled slightly. "It's fine, Ryan. I promise," I looked to the streets around us wistfully. "I'm sure he'd forgive you, too."

Ryan smirked as cars passed by, back and forth on the street. Their headlights were nearly blinding.