Echo • Six Of Crows - Kaz Brekker

7

Mavka shot up from her bed with remnants of a blurred figure above her in her eyes like reels. darting away from her covers and half falling to the floor, trying to kick the sheet around her leg away like it was dragging her back. She felt like she was being grabbed, and scrambled back with harsh, wheezing breaths until the sheet fell away from her body, untangled itself.

Her chest felt like it could break.

Her mind had been haunted by horrific things she'd never wanted to see again, to feel, to even think about or acknowledge - and bile rised in her throat.

She swallowed thickly and picked herself up, limbs jittering with tremors so much she was astonished her legs were keeping her upright.

She went from cracking her knuckles and putting hands on back of neck, looking up at the ceiling with a pounding heart. She shook her hands out at her sides, feeling like her skin was in fire as tingling grew in her fingertips.

Her breaths came out in short gasps, her throat feeling like it was constricted by something that wasn't physically there, yet it felt terrifyingly real.

She was so caught up in her own panic she didn't hear the gentle knocking at her door until it sounded out a second time.

Mavka grimaced and covered her face with her hands. Someone at her door wasn't what she needed at that moment.

Her hand trailed down to cover her mouth, quiet her breaths, suddenly entirely self conscious of the noise she was making and dreading opening the door.

She didnt even want to know who was there, who she had disturbed in their sleep, and the internalised anxiety grew - she felt small, like a kid again, the only difference being that the person at her door wouldn't have knocked back then but stormed in nearly ripping the door off of its hinges and made a beeline for her with clenched fists and an impossibly loud voice.

Mavka inhaled deeply, going to the door with wobbling knees.

Instead of opening it, she stared at the wood with dread, trying to convince herself that she wasn't in that house anymore and she was safe with the people she was with now. Things had changed.

It seemed her mind hadn't caught up to that fact and enjoyed seeing her suffer.

After a few minutes of waiting in silence, she hoped that the person on the opposite side of the wood was gone.

She went to turn away and put a hand to her forehead, her eyes beginning to tear up, when she heard it again.

Two small, hesitant knocks.

Mavka wiped underneath her eyes and grasped the handle finally, opening the door a slither so she could see through, trying her best to hide behind it.

At seeing who was outside in a blur through her tears, she frowned in confusion.

Wylan stood outside her door, fiddling with his hands and looking at her with a shy sense of curiosity. Some curls covered his face and his eyes looked tired.

"I'm sorry," he said hesitantly. "I didn't mean to intrude - I just-" he rubbed the back of his neck. "I wanted to ask if you were alright."

Mavka's eyes softened and a lump formed in her throat. She fought the urge to slam the door and retreat into her room.

The awkward boy continued when she simply stared back at him and said nothing.

"I could hear..." he trailed off, seeing her sudden ashamed expression through the gap in the door and scrawled that thought. "I mean, would you like me to get someone?"

Mavka stared back at the boy with tears in her eyes, confused by the young boys kindness and consideration. She didnt move, but looked away and sniffled quietly, shaking her head rapidly.

"I can- i can get Inej, or... or Kaz," he seemed like he just wanted to help and she found it sweet, but her heart raced again at the thought of Kaz seeing her in this pathetic state.

Her head shaking became more adamantly, and he frowned.

"Im sorry, I just wanted to help somehow," said Wylan softly. "I sometimes..."

When he trailed off, a pink tint rose in his cheeks and he looked down, cutting himself off.

Mavka watched the boy with soft eyes, not even noticing that her racing heart was beginning to calm, and the tremors were slowly but surely subsiding, her mind no longer as fixated on the traumatic memories that had dragged her from her much needed sleep.

Now, she could just feel the exhaustion weighing her down like ropes tethering her bones to the floor.

"I-I'm sorry for bothering you," Wylan stepped back, not catching her gaze, going to leave.

Words of protest caught at the lump in her throat, and she would have said something to stop him but for some reason they wouldn't move past her lips.

Her teary eyes watched his back as he went, turning back to the room just to the right of her own.

Shame made her close her door and rest her forehead against the wood with closed eyes. She had woken him up.

She moved back, her hands reaching up to tug at her hair in fists, right from the roots. The pain numbed the swarm of emotions bombarding her - she was stuck in the middle of a tornado.

The urge to let out a bone shattering scream was overwhelming but the results would be disastrous. She couldn't.

Mavka didn't go back to sleep the rest of the night, instead sitting perched on a chair by the window with one leg drawn up to her chest that she clutched, nails digging into her bare skin.

The oversized white shirt she had on as a makeshift night gown made the scars littering her legs more apparent.

After a while she looked down at her shin in the dim moonlight, eyes roaming the mottled black and blue bruising that ran in harsh lines across several parts of her leg.

By the time the sun began to rise, Mavka was the first one up and ready.

She'd bypassed every closed door, washed and changed, ensuring her jacket still held the Kruge stack securely.

With tired eyes and bruised rings underneath them, Mavka left without letting anyone know. Kaz would reprimand her for it later but she didn't give a shit.

She had to prepare herself for later and had a feeling she'd feel better if she busied herself.

Her stomach growled as she walked with her head down, cloak clutched around her body into the Financial district.

Kaz said he wanted her to exchange the money before tonight, so she would.

If any of them had something to say about her being gone so early they could simply fuck off. She was getting the job done.

And she sorely needed a distraction.