CRIMINAL / l.t

Ch. 7

Louis' POV

I enter the small house quietly, hoping he's asleep.
I waited until the middle of the night, just to be sure.
I nearly gag at the raw stench of smoke and dirt penetrating the little air this house has.
As I hesitantly walk towards the stair case, I see the familiar view of the dark living room, with the tv on and empty beer bottles covering any empty space.
I take another step and the wood floor creaks underneath me.
"Shit" I curse to myself silently
A groan travels from the other room.
My body stiffens and I'm not sure of what to do.
"Louis?"
My breathing slows.
"Is that you boy?" the deep voice becomes louder.
My mouth is incapable of answering to him.
My legs are incapable of moving further, escaping.
I stand there, like a deer under headlights, as the figure approaches me.
He's wearing the same, stained, shirt as before. His hair is still a mess and his beard is growing.
The smell he carries is worse than the house and I try to not breathe in as much.
He looks at me with his dilated blue eyes and scowls.
"Where have you been? I haven't seen your face for months." he slurs
"Studying." I whisper
"Studying?" he chuckles to himself, "You spend your time studying when you should be getting a job so you can fix things here." he says, raising his voice.
I clench my fists and my body tenses at his words.
"Fuck you" I yell, fresh tears stinging. "You're the father here. You're the one who should be mending things in this house, but ever since mom died, you've been wasting your life away."
The words rush past my lips without thought, but I don't care anymore. I'm tired of living in this fear. I'm tired of being the target for my weak father's agony.
He takes a step back, glaring at me.
It's clear he did not expect this sudden outburst.
"Don't you dare speak to me like that, boy" his voice booms.
Time seems to go faster now as his body comes in contact with mine.
I struggle to keep my feet up as I receive hard blows on the face, followed by my wrists being held with incredible force.
I can hear my heart pumping in my ears as I try to struggle free from his clammy hands.
I can taste the metallic blood in my mouth now.
My body is aching in pain.
He is yelling things that my ears can't hear.
He pulls my body to the door of the basement.
I know what is about to happen and my screams become louder.
I try to fight him, but I don't stand any chance against him.
I can feel myself going unconscious as my father begins to shove me into the steel box he has downstairs.
He forcefully shuts the box closed and I begin to gasp for air because there are only a few small holes above me.
Darkness.
The darkness is closing in on me slowly.
The cold walls of the small box are engulfing me.
Trapped.
I scream and pound, but I have no one that can help me.
I am alone in this back void.
Reality becomes lost as more time passes by and I can't tell whether I'm dead or alive.
My eyesight is dimming more and I can feel myself fading away.
..

My eyes flutter wide open.
My breathing is heavy and my body is covered in a layer of sweat.
It was just a dream.
I sit up from my bed and run my fingers through my hair, trying to calm my shaking body.
I haven't had that dream for many months now, but the feeling of reliving the memory is still the same.
It's a memory I keep locked away and no one knows about it.
What happened in that memory is the cause of my life turning out how it is.
I managed to escape from that box, but I had to leave home and I was only sixteen years old then.
The only way to survive, that young, was to make friends with the wrong sort and live off of illegal acts.
I had to throw everything I could have had in my life because I couldn't handle the abuse of my father any longer.
At the time of the dream, I filled my days with studying so that one day I could escape my old life and be successful with a good job and family.
I couldn't reach that goal anymore when I had to go be alone without a home and without money.
I had to change myself at a young age and now I'm a completely different person.
I'm incapable of having any type of relationship with someone.
I don't feel pain anymore and I don't feel sympathy when taking someone's life away.
I've grown immune to it all and I don't care.
I used to hate who I had become, but now I've come to the conclusion that this was the life meant for me and I at times I enjoy it.
I sigh.
Why has so much happened lately?
I lay back on my bed and shut my eyes and hope I can have some rest.