one

twenty two

Sophie's point of view

We both unspokenly seemed to decide at the same time that we needed to finally get up off the sofa, Maeve to wash the dried-up tears off her face and me to cook her some breakfast, or in other words pour cereal into a bowl and carry it through to the table. As usual, Maeve gave me no end of shit for making something so simple, "God I feel like fucking royalty today" she said smirking broadly at me "cereal in a bowl, who would have thought it could be possible". I glared at her, knowing full well that she was barely capable of this, "you mean this isn't the best, most adventurous meal you've had in your entire life", I shot back sarcastically. Maeve rolled her eyes at me, her spoon still hanging out of her mouth making her look adorable despite her angry expression. I grinned despite myself, my stomach suddenly feeling churned up and out of place inside my body. "What?" Maeve asked, realisation setting in that I was starting to blush yet again. "You just, you look really beautiful today" I choked out, my voice getting slightly stronger as I went on. Maeve went dramatically bright red and smiled despite herself, then, quickly looking down at the floor "perv" she said jokingly. I gasped dramatically and leapt up from my bowl, dancing over to leap on top of her, "we all know you're the real perv around here" I whispered in her ear. Maeve twisted round, tickling me aggressively from all angles. We fell off the chair, landing tangled but still laughing hysterically, on the floor. I reached up and grabbed Maeve's arm, twisting her round so that I was finally in control. She deftly flipped me over, pressing my body into the floor seemingly effortlessly and letting her weight dangle above me. Suddenly her hands seemed to loosen around my wrists, her body retreating. I took the opportunity to sit up, not quite anticipating how close that would bring our bodies together. My chest pressed into Maeve's, my body almost leaning into hers despite itself, for support. Maeve's eyes seemed to change colour slightly and her breathing sped up, odd given we were finally sitting still. I let myself take her in, her eyebrows like little hats over her eyes and her freckles constellations around her nose. Her hands were clenched, confused and the tension between us ever-increasing. Maeve was intoxicating, some unknown force that lingered in the room constantly pulling us closer, whether I wanted that or not. She was simultaneously calming and made my heartbeat go wild, my hands curling inwards, fingers pressing down on thumbs in an effort to restrain themselves from reaching over and grabbing her hand. She was so close to me. My body and brain seemed to grapple, the rational part telling me to get out of that situation as quickly as possible, after all Maeve and I had only just mended our friendship, I didn't want to mess it up again. On the other hand though, the emotional part of me wanted to run my hands over Maeve's cheeks, trace the outline of her lips and most of all, just stay here with her, letting the want take me away. It didn't help that Maeve's eyes were glued on my face, her eyes open in apparent wonder. She leant forwards, biting her bottom lip in apparent anticipation, and I tilted my head, my hands unclenching and reaching up towards her shoulders to cup the back of her neck. 

Interrupted by sudden knocking at the door we sprung apart, heads spinning from being so close together. I sat back, still panting and watched as Maeve walked over to the door, unsure if I had enough strength left to do the same. Intensity clearly really takes it out of you. Aimee and Kyle, her current boyfriend, were waving outside, shouldering a massive bag of popcorn and two bottles of vodka between them. I felt angry despite myself, we had been so close. Maeve turned, immediately noticing the change in expression on my face. "Don't worry Sophie, I'm sure next time we try to kiss we won't be interrupted". I blinked quickly, Maeve's brashness about the whole thing catching me off guard. "Next time" I whispered silently again and again, a smile taking over my features. 

"God, someone's happy to see me" Kyle announced, gesturing at me and grinning. Aimee interrupted "no it's me and Soph that are friends", then unsure "we are friends aren't we?". I finally stood up, pulling Aimee over to sit next to me on the sofa "Of course we are". Maeve pouted and pushed me over so that she could sit on the other side of my body, intertwining her hands with mine under the blanket we had slept under outside.

Later that evening I lay awake, listening to the calm breaths of those around me. We had watched far too may episodes of Atypical, a series we had decided at the beginning of term we would discover together, then, us high on life and Kyle on weed, talked into the early hours of the morning, Maeve and I finding out far more about Aimee and Kyle's sex life than we ever wanted to know. I pulled my eyes open, forcing myself to stay awake long enough to remember what had happened today. Then, shifting my body weight slightly, I managed to pull my pencil and song list out of my guitar case that was propped up nearby on the sofa. I scribbled a messy 

9. I'm in love with you, sorry - j'san

at the bottom of the page. It was a beautiful song, a perfect portrayal of loving someone and knowing the world will eventually implode and life is meaningless, but loving them anyway, because love isn't something you choose it just happens sometimes. 

I fell asleep, halfway through a train of thought, my song list resting precariously on my chest.