Its 3:00 in the afternoon and Calum is gone. I sit up in his bed feeling awkward. What does someone do in their ex boyfriend's bed?well actually at this point im not sure exactly what calum is to me or what I am to him. Last night was pretty eventful. I dont want to think about any of it,but the sexual harassment and the sight of my mother in pain at the hands of my father isnt something I can forget so quickly. I sigh and look around. Not a thing has changed in Calums room. The same broken lamp stands crookedly on his night stand,the same posters are hung up on the walls(the Kurt cobain one where he is bent over a guitar and smoking a cigarette is still my favorite),and of course his bass and electric acoustic lying calmly against his bookshelf. I remember how the lamp on his nightstand broke. Its pretty embarassing. My butt might have knocked it over the first time we kissed. I was so nervous when he leaned in I backed up to quickly and it fell to the floor.
*
Its been an hour and 25 minutes and calum still isn't here. Im growing uncomfortable in this oversized t shirt of his and I don't want to roam around his house with nothing else on. Where are my fucking clothes?
I pull the comforter off of my bare legs and shiver. I look around his room for where my clothes could be. As I look through his closet I accidentally knock a shoe box filled with papers over." Dammit." I mutter. All it is is a bunch of soccer certificates a few concert tickets and a piece of notebook paper that happens to be crumpled up.please don't let it be what I think it is.
Suprisingly its not the bet,but song lyrics. Its called "Amnesia".I read over all the lyrics and when im done I pause and sit on the bedroom floor. These lyrics said everything I needed to hear and realize. Calum was sorry and even though he'd hurt me.. I'd hurt him the most.
*
At 5:30 Calum eventually came back. I was laying in his bed when I heard the bedroom door squeak and shut. I think he thinks im sleeping but im watching him. Not creepy at all Skylar. He takes off his shoes and his shirt and comes and lays down next to me. I don't bother with the "pretend im sleeping" act. I look over at him and he looks over at me. We lay there in silence. Its like a game to see who will speak first.
"Im sorry." I tell him. He looks confused. I don't say anything else and neither does he. I just lye my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat.
