The Angel,The Devil,The Nerd

Chapter 20 - We are nothing to each other

CHAPTER 20 - WE ARE NOTHING TO EACH OTHER

In the end, the party last night wasn't too bad, especially as, just as Eric left, Aisha came to me, saying she had to flee from that boy she'd been texting, because he was so boring and she couldn't stand him anymore. So she brought me back to the party and I kind of managed to have some fun, even talking to Kyle and a few other people. In the end it wasn't too bad, but I still kept thinking about Eric and his words ...

I matter. What's that supposed to mean? I matter to him? Why? Even if he's always known me without me ever realizing it, we still are pretty much strangers to each other. Every time we talk, it's just me stammering in fear and him grunting, well, at first, then it became him freaking me out with his odd phrases, just like last night.

I matter. The more I think about it, the more I convince myself of the most wrong interpretation: that I matter to him. And it's impossible and certainly I'm wrong, but ... well, the simple thought brought a small smile on my lips. Don't ask me why, I have no idea.

"Who?" I heard someone asking from behind me, just as a hand came in contact with my shoulder. I swear, I'll get the bruise sooner or later for how much she slaps it.

I turned around to a grinning Aisha, who seemed particularly in a good mood as she wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"Who what?" I asked, confused.

She chuckled. "Who were you thinking about?" She asked and I kind of blushed, knowing she'd just busted me, seeing me smile all alone and for no reason while I stood in front of my locker that I'd just closed.

Aisha squeezed me against her slim side, grinning. "It's him, isn't it? The blonde stud. You were smiling so bright. Did you guys make up? I bet he smacked a wet kiss on your pinky cheek and you forgot it all. Or did he go further?"

"Aisha ..."

"Oh! Don't tell me, you guys made out!" She pulled back, practically shoving me away in her flabbergasted moment, as she awed. "Natalie! Good girls don't do those things!"

I lowered my glanced, my cheeks now crimson, as she all but shouted that, so much that a few heads turned to us and even one in particular I could spot beneath the stairs glanced at me.

When we locked gazes, Eric held his stare but I gulped, quickly averting my eyes, not really feeling able to endure that intense look, especially after last night and my mind-blowing thoughts about him that keep on changing.

I mean, one moment I hate him and I think he's the real incarnation of evil, the other I blush and stupidly smile at the thought of him actually caring about me.

Because I matter, he said. For as much as I know it can't be it, I know what he meant ... I matter to him. So he cares. Which is odd per se, considering he never cares about anybody, but it's even weirder if you consider we are nothing to each other. But maybe with the fact that he knows me, has known me from afar since years apparently, maybe with that, he came to care, possibly just because he pities me and my awkward self. Yeah, there can't be any other explanation.

Aisha laughed out loud when she saw me so embarrassed, once more wrapping her arm around my shoulders and leaning her temple on mine. "There you go, I got you your boy's attention. Now why don't you walk up to him and greet him like a real woman does?"

My eyes widened as she practically implied I should just walk up straight to Eric and kiss him, she even shoved me towards his direction. Why on Earth would I ever do that? So that he can push me away and make of me the clown of the whole school? No, thanks.