Tuesday, December 15th
"You starting?" Alice asked Technoblade. She was apparently joining him in a quest Dream had for them.
In most things, she didn't like being uniformed but when it came to roleplaying, she didn't want to know everything. She chose not to know the outcome of Dream's offer.
"Yup, we're live and we've got some work to do," He responded. Alice got things prepared for their journey as Techno explained what he was doing today. (You can find Techno's VODS on his channel, this all actually happened if you were wondering:))
"So he wants me to meet him at this mountain. And you see this is the same mountain I met him at 3 months ago," Techno explained. He let that sink in and Alice turned to him slowly.
"You don't remember-"
"I don't remember where it is," He let out a laugh as Alice groaned.
"And you're not going to ask-"
"I'm not going to ask where it is," He confirmed. "But I did get you this." He threw her a trident and she let out a small gasp.
"Thank you," She switched it between her hands.
"Are you going to wear armor?" He asked. Currently she had enchanted diamond armor on with enchanted diamond tools. Her netherite sets were tucked away in her enderchest.
"Appear weak when you are strong," She hummed the quote. Her friend chuckled in response.
"Well, I guess we should try to figure out where this mountain is," She followed him to his nether portal. They fell into comfortable conversation as they searched for the mountain and Alice messed around with her trident.
"Human Gps! That's the mountain right there! I'm so smart!" Alice laughed at her friend's excitement and followed him to the cliff. They scaled their way up and Dream was waiting at the top.
"Alright, let's vc..." Techno mumbled and soon Dream was in their call.
"Hi," He greeted the two.
"Hellloo," Techno responded.
"You brought Alice..?"
"Never leave home without her," Techno chuckled.
"You can barley manage to leave without me," She rolled her eyes.
"That's besides the point," He muttered. "Long time no see, Dream. I definitely did not forget where this mountain was."
"Yeah..I was gonna say, you came from a weird direction," Dream spun around. "And I didn't expect Alice to come with you."
"Well, we're partners Dream. Where he goes I go," She said smugly.
"Then I can assume you'll be on his side?" He asked.
"What can I say? I know where my loyalty lies, you're smart, I'm sure you can figure enough out," She answered.
"You flatter me," He chuckled.
"If that's what you want to call it," She muttered.
"We obviously know that since you're so smart, we had to obscure the way back to our base, hence the acting lost when in reality, we were just thinking ahead.." Techno was trying to make himself feel better. Dream didn't answer for a moment, before letting out a wheeze at his wording.
"Anyways! You, uh you said you had some sort of map, Dream," Techno moved on.
"Yes! I also have information along side the map," Dream said. "I have heard from a spy of mine, that there is a bounty hunting team planning to hunt you down and kill you."
A spy...
He was always in control, always one step ahead of everyone else. Other than Alice of course, as much as he thought he controlled her. He didn't.
"And this isn't dangerous?" Techno asked.
"No, it would be in my..best interest that you didn't die," Dream answered. "Alice along with that, you two are better alive."
"If we get hurt in this.."
"You won't! I'm doing you a favor, besides even if it does end up being dangerous, the two of you could deal with it," Dream cut her off.
She didn't really like that answer but it would have to do.
Dream and Techno had a moment of 0 IQ where they couldn't read the map, so Alice had to do it for them. She and Techno spent an hour getting to a woodland mansion and she was worried there might be some sort of trap.
They ended up getting three totems of undying, which Alice thought of success. Dream was telling the truth, there really wasn't any danger. Then chat trolled them. Not a success.
•
Now that the stream was over, she could call Sean and talk to him about Christmas. She had texted him earlier saying they had something important to talk about, so now she could get it over with.
"What's up Allie?"
"Hey Sean, how's your day been?" She asked.
"Pretty fucking stressful because you said we need to have an important talk and then you go and stream for an hour," He said pointy.
"I just had to made sure I didn't forget!"
"Forget my ass, I know you've been thinking about it all day," He objected.
"You don't know that," She argued on.
"I bet I do," He challenged.
"...It wasn't all I thought about," She grumbled
"HAHA I WAS RIGHT," He shouted. "Now important thing, tell me now."
"We aren't going to San Francisco for Christmas," She told him.
"Oh?"
"Yeah, we didn't want to deal with all of...that," She chuckled.
"I wouldn't want to either," He scoffed. "Are you just staying home instead?"
"Not exactly.." She tried to think of a way to word it. "We..wanted to visit..you maybe?"
"Me?! Wait, you want to come here?! Allie!"
"I mean, yeah..how long has it been since we've seen each other?" She chuckled at his response.
"A very fucking long time!"
"Yeah, so I was hoping we could visit and see you for Christmas. We'd quarantine and we can get a hotel room or-"
"Stay in a hotel? Allie, if you're saying you can get Techno on a plane then you're staying at my place," He assured.
"You're agreeing very easily.." She said carefully.
"Is it that unbelievable that I want you to come stay with me?! I can show you around and we'd spend Christmas together and oh this is going to be so great."
"We haven't even looked at tickets yet.."
"I'll fly you out, I don't care," He exclaimed. "What days do you want to stay? How long would you even stay for? Don't you have a whole roleplay thing going on?"
"Umm, I don't know, I don't know, and yes but we can bring our laptops and headsets," She answered. She heard him giggle like a little kid and held back a laugh.
"Please tell me this isn't a joke, you aren't yanking my chain?"
"I'm serious, I'd love to spend Christmas with you and Techno thinks you're cool so he's fine with coming," She told him.
"Well yeah, I knew you wouldn't come here if he wasn't going to. That's sort of how you two work these days," He said amusingly.
"Yeah..and on another note, if Corpse were to say he'd watch your cat anytime, would this be exaggerated or the truth?" She asked. Alice shared a lot of pictures of Zu with Corpse and he offered to cat sit anytime just so he could see him.
"He would take your cat in a heartbeat," Sean laughed. "Do you know how many times he's told me about Zu without showing me actually pictures?" Alice laughed at that.
"I was thinking of asking him to watch Zu while we visit you," She offered.
"I'm so proud, you guys are like best friends now," She could hear him fake cry. "I think if he were to meet up with anyone, it'd definitely be you."
"I don't want to overstep any boundaries though," She said.
"Then talk to him about it, he can always wear a mask and sunglasses or something. Go full cameo and wear some camouflage, you'd never see him," Sean joked.
"Yeah, I will. Thank you," She smiled.
"We can talk about Britain plans later, I've got an Among Us game to join. Do you want me to text you if a spot opens up?"
"Nah, I'll be fine. I think I'll be joining Karl when he tours Corpse around the smp," She declined.
"Alright, have fun!" He yelled.
"Bye Sean," She laughed.
"I love you!"
"Love you too," She went back to her computer after he hung up. She'd just have to chill and wait until her time to join. She texted Corpse saying she wanted to talk to him afterwards.
•
Alice got a bit distracted with watching Sean's stream but she eventually joined the server and their vc.
"Is that Alice?!" Karl did his greeting.
"Alice?" Quackity did a british accent.
"Hello!" Niki said happily. Sapnap didn't greet her, the little bitch.
"Hellloo," She responded.
"Hi Alice," Corpse said.
"Hey buddy, how's the tour going?"
"They were building me a house but now they're doing a talent show or something.."
"Ah, sounds fun," She chuckled.
"Join us, please," He requested.
"Alright," She smiled and made her way to wherever they were, listening to the yelling. Once she got there, she had to take a moment.
"Why is that your skin?"
"It's Bingus, don't tell me you don't like Bingus," He gasped.
"No...no he's great.." She trailed off. "I'm just gonna look at pretty Niki over here.."
"Awwe!" Niki crouched at her a bunch as Karl comforted a sad Corpse.
•
She tried to laugh silently as Karl sang "White Tee" in a very upbeat tone but she wasn't very successful.
"You think it's funny? These are my lyrics Alice," Corpse said, faking offense. "I can't believe you'd laugh at them." She had to wheeze because she was trying to hold the laughter back. Corpse chuckled at her once she stopped which made her start wheezing again.
"St..op," She forced out.
"It's not," He was saying through his giggles. "It's not my fault." She turned to look at him and the Bingus skin just made her laugh again.
"Why do you have to be fucking Bingus?" She asked.
"I don't wanna talk to you anymore," He turned away from her.
"No! No...I'm sorry," Her stomach was starting to hurt from laughing so hard.
"I'm gonna block you," He threatened.
"No! No, no, no, we have things to discuss remember? You can't block me!"
"...Oh yeah, that's true.." He mumbled. "After we talk, then I'll decide."
"W-what do you guys have to discuss?" Karl asked.
"It's a secret," Corpse replied.
"Well you can tell us," Karl decided.
"No, I-"
"Yeah you can tell us," Karl said.
"No, I really don't know because it's a secret," He laughed.
"Well Alice you can tell us," Karl suggested.
"No," She smiled.
"No, you can tell us," He insisted.
"Yeah no secrets," Sapnap agreed.
"I gotta go," She sighed.
"You can't dip!" Quackity said in his auto tune.
"I have more secret things to do," She said ominously.
"You gotta tell us," Karl whined.
"Well I'll tell Corpse later, but I can't tell you," She chuckled
"Whyyyy?" Quackity cried.
"Because I don't know if it's actually going to happen, that's why we have to discuss," She explained.
"Is Alice planning something?" Karl questioned.
"Perhaps, perhaps," She smiled and listened to Karl's laugh. "I'm still leaving though, I have some stuff I have to talk about with Techno."
"I'll talk to you later then buddy," Corpse said. Alice paused.
"Buddy?"
"Bye bye bud," He said and she could hear him smiling.
"Bye bye Buddy," She said quietly and left. She didn't expect him to reciprocate the nickname but it made her happy. Now to talk to Techno about more possible ideas for Britain.
•
She picked up the phone as Corpse called.
"Hello, hello," She greeted. Her excitement was growing but the minute as she realized just how fun this would be.
"Hi, what exactly are we discussing?" He asked straightaway.
"I'm going to Britain for Christmas!" She almost sang.
"Wow, that's fun," He chuckled.
"And Zu needs a babysitter," She gave him the hint.
"Well you should probably find one fast, Christmas in like..ten days," He advised.
"Buddy...you're the babysitter," She said slowly.
"What?...oh, ohhhh..wait really?!"
"I mean, I'd like you to be?" She laughed as she questioned.
"I'll definitely be," He said instantly. "Wait does this mean we get to meet up?"
"Sure, you could wear a mask and sunglasses if you wanted," She shrugged.
"I feel bad then.."
"Don't, it's your face..that's kinda a big deal," She chuckled.
"I'll think about it, but yes I will watch Zu," He confirmed. "Are you excited?"
"I'm extremely excited and I think I'm even more nervous," She let out an anxious laugh.
"Tell me about your plans, I want to hear all about it," He said. Alice smiled as she started to talk about it. How did she get this lucky because of a pineapple?
•
Alice was feeling great, she was going to be in Britain for Christmas and she wouldn't have to deal with a dysfunctional family.
She picked up the phone in a state on confusion as Wilbur called her. It was almost 4am, why was he awake?
"Alice darling!"
"Wilbur? Why are you awake?" She asked.
"I'm having a nice glass of wine!" He told her. "I'm definitely not sober!" He laughed.
"Are you alright? Why are you drinking?"
"Cause it's been a good week! My week's been so great and so wine," He concluded.
"Are you at home?"
"Yes of course, I'm in my room," He responded. "You ask so many questions!"
"Well, I'm a bit worried considering you just called me to say your drunk," She exclaimed.
"I'm not drunk, tipsy I'd say...yeah tipsy," He chuckled. "Hey, y'know Big Q is live right now? I joined him earlier and had a little chat. He's just talkin to his stream..I'd like to have a wine stream with him. You could join us!"
"I don't drink Wilbur," She sighed.
"Oh boo," He pouted. "I'm going to join Quackity and ask him."
"No, no, no Wilbur-" He left before she finished. "Technoblade, Wilbur is drunk and he's joining Quackity's stream!"
"Of course he is," She heard him sigh. She went to discord and joined Quackity's as Wilbur was asking a tired Tubbo if he romanticized life.
"Wilbur, Wilbur," She sighed. "Leave the poor boy alone."
"I'm just asking! Quackity said he'd do the stream with me since yOu DoNt DrInK," He mocked her.
"Hi Alice," A sleepy Tubbo greeted.
"Sorry Tubbo," She apologized.
"It's okay," He yawned.
"Alice, Alice you don't drink?" Quackity asked.
"Boring right?!" Wilbur laughed. "Wine is so good and she won't even drink it." Alice just sighed and rubbed her temple.
"Alice were you and Wilbur on a call before this?" Quackity laughed nervously
"We call all the time! Dream and George would be jealous of all of our sleep calls," He chuckled.
"Wilbur!" Alice groaned.
"Speaking of sleeping, Tubbo you need to flip that pillow around. You deserve the cold side brother, you deserve it," His voice was muffled from discord on his phone. "You flip that motherfucker to the cold side because you deserve it."
"What's going on?" Tubbo sounded exhausted. Alice mentally sobbed at the fact that this poor boy had to deal with a drunk Wilbur.
"Apparently you deserve the cold side," Ranboo joined them.
"Ohhh no, Ranboo no," She cried, making Quackity bark out a laugh.
"What's wrong with Alice?"
"Wilbur please..." She said hopelessly as he repeatedly said 'take a swig of water.'
The conversation became strangely motivational as Wilbur and Quackity screamed about being the main character in your own world. Technoblade joined half way through and started yelling with them, making Alice feel even worse for Tubbo and Ranboo.
"I'm having another glass of wine," Wilbur decided after their yelling about being kings.
"Noooo," Alice dragged the word out.
"I think we broke Alice," Ranboo observed.
"She'll be finnne," Techno assured. "Back to the king talk." He insinuated another long and loud discussion about kings. It somehow shifted into challenging the sun.
"We're gonna chase after the sun and force it to have a staring contest with us!" Technoblade was using quite a lot of emotion in his voice.
"Why can't you guys just be normal," Alice said in a defeated manner. She felt like Phil when he was the one left to watch over the group of crack addicts.
"They aren't normal," Ranboo sighed.
"Alice has just been put on babysitting duty and she's failing miserably," Tubbo laughed.
"Why aren't you sleeping, it's 4am!" She yelled. "Quackity you can't drink if you're in America right now! And Techno, stop encouraging them!"
"Tomorrow, I'm going to go into a field and build a barn!" Wilbur said in a deep voice.
"Why?!" Alice shouted. "Where is Dadza when you need him?"
Wilbur continued to talk about barns and she wondered if this was another hyperfixation he was having. It continued on for another ten minutes before Wilbur started to crash.
"God...I am..I am so fucking drunk," He laughed.
"But that was all your choice Wilbur, it's your day!" Quackity kept the bit going. "Do jumping jacks Wilbur, do some jumping jacks."
"No.." Alice groaned.
"I'm doing my jumping jacks!" Wilbur told them.
Quackity started doing his own calisthenics and Wilbur announced that he'd ascended.
"Do we need to call someone?" Ranboo asked, Alice assumed herself.
"I don't know," She sighed. "Don't hurt yourself please."
"Don't fall!" Ranboo added. The talk about ascending went on for a while and Alice stopped comprehending what happened at that point. She could feel a headache coming on from the overwhelming stress that was provided.
"Quackity I'm going to sleep so fucking hard, but you have to build the barn," Wilbur requested.
"I'll build the barn!"
"Build the barn, Alice I'll call you, Quackity build that barn," Wilbur left the call.
"Goodnight everyone," Alice sighed before leaving. She answered Wilbur's FaceTime a moment later and he was crashed on his bed.
"Hey pretty lady," He grinned at the camera making Alice shake her head and flush red.
"Are you going to bed?" She asked.
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not, you never know with a dirty crime boy," He snickered.
"Well I'm wondering because you still have your glasses and clothes on," She noticed. "I don't think sleeping in a sweater is very comfortable."
"I'll change since you're sooo worried about it," He winked before leaving the frame. Of course drunk Wilbur was just more chaotic and charismatic.
He laid back down on his bed and held the camera sideways. "There, happy now?"
"Have you been drinking water?"
"So many questions," He sighed.
"Wilbur."
"No, I haven't. I'll get my water bottle," He groaned, left, and came back with his bottle. He made a big show of drinking it before giving her a look.
"Now I'm happy, yes," She told him.
"Why don't you drink?" He asked. He was acting like a child, getting wrapped up in his blankets.
"I don't know, bad history with it I suppose. Sometimes people aren't the nicest when they're drunk..it just sort of sticks with you," She shrugged and frowned.
"Turn that frown upside down! I'll buy a barn for you too if it makes you feel better," He promise, making her laugh.
"What is this obsession about barns?"
"I just think they're nice," He gave her a dopey smile before yawning. "I am so incredibly tired."
"I'll let you sleep then," She nodded.
"You'll stay right? You'll stay with me?" He asked worriedly.
"I'll stay," She said softly.
"I like it better when you're around darling," He said tiredly and for a moment, it felt like her heart squeezed.
"Well, I'm not going anywhere," She promised. She was faintly aware of just how true that statement would be.
——————————————————————————
Why is every Quackity stream more chaotic than the last, I legit can't make this shit up.