{the desert}
after another two days of staying in the shack, they decided to move on. they managed to travel quite a bit, but that was because of their still very stolen ostrich.
and that's how they got where they were now, the middle of nowhere, with a groaning iroh, an annoyed zuko, and a very tired hana.
zuko finally said something, "maybe we should make camp."
"no, please, don't stop for me," iroh said with pain in his voice.
more moans and groans came from him.
hana sighed, "let's make camp."
zuko quickly stopped the ostrich and got off. hana and iroh jumped off as well. iroh ran over and sat on a large rock.
the ostrich horse clearly heard something because it perked up and looked out towards the distance. zuko and hana quickly got into defensive positions, they were going to defend whatever they had.
"what now?" iroh was defeated.
rhinos surrounded them but hana and zuko didn't drop their positions.
it seemed iroh recognized one of them, "colonel mongke! what a pleasant surprise!"
"if you're surprised we're here then the dragon of the west has lost a few steps," the colonel was stern and his men readied their weapons
hana sighed in defeat. she dropped her pose.
we can't get a week without shit, can we?
"you know these guys?" zuko asked.
"sure. colonel mongke and the rough riders are legendary. each one is a different kind of weapons specialist. they are also a very capable singing group," he explained.
"cool, but are they gonna kill us?" hana asked, clearly done with this encounter already.
iroh shrugged in response.
oh, good to know.
"we're not here to give a concert. we're here to apprehend fugitives!"
"would you like some tea first? i'd love some. how about you, kachi? I make you as a jasmine man. am i right?" iroh offered.
truthfully, hana couldn't tell if he was fucking around. maybe he was trying to bait them and he'd kick their ass, but hana really didn't know.
mongke was annoyed, "enough stalling! round 'em up!"
a man threw a ball with chains wrapped around it at iroh. iroh quickly kicked the ball way, redirecting it. it wrapped around another warrior's rhinos.
blasts of fire were thrown at iroh but he was able to dodge them, tumbling to the ground. he got back up and got close to the rhino he had wrapped the ball around. he slapped it's back and it took off with the man who originally had thrown the ball at iroh.
arrows were being shot at zuko, he quickly destroyed the arrows and shot fire at the warrior responsible.
hana saw a rhino come towards iroh, it was mongke's rhino. he began to blast fire at him. hana quickly reacted and blasted a piece of earth up under the rhino.
the rhino lifted its front legs trying to avoid it, but the colonel was thrown off. iroh quickly grabbed their ostrich and jumped on. hana and zuko quickly got on too.
they were being followed by another man and his rhino. he tosses a grenade at them, hoping to either kill them or injury them enough to apprehend them.
luckily, though, they missed it when it exploded. the only thing that hit them was the smoke. they were able to emerge from the smoke unharmed.
"it's nice to see old friends," iroh said.
"FRIENDS? i would have thought you were sworn enemies," hana replied.
"too bad you don't have any old friends that don't want to attack you," zuko was a bit bitter.
iroh hummed, "old friends that don't want to attack me..."
they traveled for a long time. they found a bar. it seemed to be where travelers have stopped to get supplies, or to get piss drunk.
they walked in and found a table. they paid for some tea and sat quietly for a while. they were looking for help but she knew that there was a small chance of that happening.
"no one here is going to help us. these people just look like filthy wanderers," zuko's temper was quite evident.
hana rolled her eyes, "so do we, dipshit!"
iroh pointed to a bald man at a pai sho table, "ah, this is interesting. i think i've found our friend."
"you brought us here to gamble on pai sho?" zuko said and iroh stood up.
"i don't think this is a gamble," he walked over to the man.
hana and zuko quickly got up and followed. they whispered to each other trying to figure out what the fuck the elder was doing.
"he's so cryptic sometimes," zuko let out an exasperated sigh.
"you're telling me," she snorted.
they watched as iroh took a seat, "may i have this game?"
"the guest has the first move," he waved his arm, telling him to sit. iroh quickly placed a lotus tile down, "i see you favor the white lotus gambit. not many still cling to the ancient ways."
"those who do can always find a friend," he responded.
"then let us play."
hana raised her eyebrows. this was so damn cryptic, it was even worse than usual. she hated it. she hated not knowing what was going to happen because it scared her.
zuko and hana watched as they quickly slapped down tiles on the bored. their eyes moved from each man as they played another tile.
it was so quick, hana didn't even notice the form it took. it was the shape of a lotus flower.
"welcome, brother. the white lotus opens wide to those who know her secrets," the man ominously said.
zuko was through with their theatrics, "what are you old gasbags talking about?"
hana nearly died laughing but managed to keep her mouth shut.
iroh rolled a tile over his knuckles and clutched it, "i always tried to tell you that pai sho is more than just a game."
"it's over!" a man yelled at them. "you three fugitives are coming with me."
the man that iroh had played pai sho with walked in front of the man, "i knew it! you three are wanted criminals with a giant bounty on your heads!"
"i thought you said he would help!" zuko looked at iroh panicked.
"uh, yeah, what the fuck?" hana was also terrified.
"he is. just watch."
the 'snitch', which was what hana dubbed him, turned around and looked at the big dude behind him, "you think you're going to capture them and collect all that gold?"
"gold," another in the bar became interested.
this wasn't how i wanted to die, but i guess it's fine.
everyone in the bar surrounded the big man and his friend. the big one smiles, he clearly knew he could handle it.
zuko, hana, iroh, and the snitch quickly ran out. he guided them to a small village. he let them enter one of the buildings. it was a flower shop.
how fitting.
the man closed the door, turned to the three, and bowed, "it is an honor to welcome such a high-ranking member of the order of the white lotus. being a grand master, you must know many secrets."
"now that you played pai sho, are you going to do some flower arranging, or is this club going to offer some real help?" zuko crossed his arms.
hana turned and smacked his arm, "shut up. he's helped us enough."
"you must forgive my nephew and his friend. they are not initiated and have little appreciation for the cryptic arts," iroh walked to the door in the back of the shop with the man. hana and zuko followed them.
"to be fair, that shit was a bit too creepy for my liking," she defended herself.
the man knocked on the door and a man from the inside responded, "who knocks at the guarded gate?"
"one who has eaten the fruit and tasted its mysteries," the door opened.
the snitch and iroh walked in, but when hana and zuko tried the door shut.
the door's window open and iroh peaked his head out, "i'm afraid it's members only. wait out here."
the two grumbled. hana quickly found a spot on the ground and zuko stood next to a plant. the two fell asleep in their positions.
they awoke when iroh came out. it scared zuko and he almost hit his uncle. hana bumped herself up using her bending.
"what's going on? is the club meeting over?" zuko asked at a rapid speed.
"everything is taken care of. we're heading to ba sing se," iroh told the two.
"ba sing se?" hana asked.
"why would we go to the earth kingdom capital?" zuko questioned.
"the city is filled with refugees. no one will notice three more," the snitch informed them.
iroh and him bowed, "we can hide in plain sight there. and it's the safest place in the world from the fire nation. even i couldn't break through the city."
another entered the shop, "i have the passports for our guests, but there are two mean out of the street looking for them."
hana peered out the window and looked at the men, "i have an idea."
"what is it?" they asked.
she pointed to large flower pots, "the pots. we put fake ones on top. iroh in one and zuko and i in the other. we're skinny enough to make it work."
the man nodded, "yes, excellent idea."
they pulled over the pots, quickly dumped out the things they had in it, and they put them on wagons.
"i guess i'll go in first," hana said.
zuko acted as a balance for her as she got in. she was careful not to break anything.
"are you in there?" he asked.
hana moved around, creating space for zuko to get in, "yeah! come in!"
zuko squeezed himself in, "i'm surprised we fit."
"me too."
they heard iroh struggling to get in his. they snorted but kept it quiet.
someone tapped on their pot, "are you ready?"
"yeah!" they called out at the same time.
the wagon began to move. hana and zuko looked at each other with fear in their eyes, they really did not want to be caught.
they kept it quiet until they no longer heard the rustling of the small village. then they communicated quietly.
when they definitely knew it was safe, they poked their heads out of the pot and saw nothing but sand. they sunk back into their pot.
"this is going to be a long journey, isn't it?"
"yep."
"fuck."
lexi speaks;
those last lines literally could be either one of them and i think that its so funny