*broken hearts*
*The day of engagement*
"Aaaaahhh.." a child screams in pain. Everyone including Bondita runs to him nd sees blood coming out of his leg. Bondita nd Misha runs to him nd make him sit down. They take a cloth nd water nd cleans it nd then cover it. During that the boy kept screaming nd no one came for the help...
"Ae! Kya ho rha h yaha pe? Chalo sab. Kaam karo apna." The men push everyone for work. Everyone gets busy in their work, not wanting to do this. Some of them were digging; some were breaking the bricks, nd some were transporting the broken bricks nd soil to other places... Everyome just wanted to go home, to their loved ones...
There few guards were talking about Indra nd Neeya's engagement which gets Bondita's attention. 1st man "Aaj to Indra babu aur Neeya ki sagai h." 2nd man "Ha. Are Neeya whi h na jisne us Subhadh ka katla kia?" 1st man "Ha. Whi h." 3rd man "Hey durga! Aisi ladki se koi kaise shadi kar skta h. Hehh!!" 1st man,"are aaj to jadhn hoga." Bondita gets worried bout Neeya.. Neeya didi ki sagai...Indra se...nhi!
*•______________________•*
Neeya decided to go to the Roy Choudhary Haveli with her Ma as she dont have anything to do and after what happened in Sampoorna's wedding, she wanted to talk to Anirudh.
On the other hand, Anirudh was in balcony with Saudamini sipping his coffee. "Aaj Indra ki sagai h. Tum chaloge?" Saudamini ask.
Anirudh nods, but for some reason he dont want to; maybe he dont want to see Neeya or maybe cuz he cant see her getting engaged with someone else... "Aaj maine baba se suna ki Neeya ne kisi Subhash ji ko maar dia!? Mujhe vishwas nhi ho rha ki wo aisa kar skti h." Anirudh turns to her,"Bhaumik kaka ne? Aur kya kaha?" "Kal shaam ghar pe kuch mehman aae the. Wo log apas mai baat kr rhe the ki Neeya ne hi Subhash ji ko mara h aur yaha tak ki baaki baccho ke sath unka beta bhi gayab h." "Par Neeya q karegi ye sab?" "Mujhe nhi pata lekin wo keh rhe the Neeya ke baba ko dand dia gaya tha kyuki wo sabko bhadka rhe the aur isilie Kamal Kaka ne uske baba ko dand dia lekin usse pehle hi uske baba ne gun cheenke khud ko goli maar di.....Mujhe jyada to nhi pata lekin ho sakta h ki Subhashji ko sacchai pata chal gai ho aur isiie Neeya ne unhe maar dia?" Anirudh thinks for awhile.
He recalls Neeya mentioning bout her baba and promising herself to show what killing her Baba means. "Anirudh! Humari sagai ki tareekh nikal gi h." Anirudh looks at her. "Agle 2 hafte mai h. Mai bahut khush hu Anirudh...Bahut" She hugs him. Anirudh fakes a smile nd keeps his hand on her back. 'Mai humesha se tumse shadi karna chahta tha Mini....phir mujhe utni khushi q nhi ho rhi jitni tumhe itne din baad dekhne se hui...Q sab galat sa lag rha...Q mera mann khush hone ke bajaye udaas h. q?'
Neeya reach Haveli nd sees both Anirudh nd Saudamini hugging each other on the balcony.She feels jealousy by looking at Saudamini hugging him. How much she has always wanted to hug him. Anirudh notice Neeya looking at them nd they lock eyes. After few seconds he separates himself from her. Neeya also goes inside to the kitchen with her Ma.
"Nomoskar Koyli kaki, Bihari kaka." She greets them. She looks at everyone cooking. Ma was cooking some vegetable whereas Koyli kaki was making roti. She thought to cook something too. "Ma. Mai saundesh bana du?" Ma smiles nd nods.
Neeya with the help of Ma collects required ingredients:-milk, lemon, sugar, jaggery(Gudh) nd a cooking pot. She first start preparing the fresh paneer by boiling the milk and then adding adding lemon(nimbu). After that milk begins curdling. She puts the pot down once the milk is curdled. She takes another pot nd cover it with clean cloth nd pours al the curdled milk over it. She sees paneer on the cloth nd smiles. After this she mashed the paneer and then cook it with a mixture of sugar and jaggery. At last she put it on low flame to get the right texture and consistency in the saundesh. 'Anirudh ji ko saundesh bahut psnd h. Ye apke lie h Anirudh ji.' She smiles.
"Ban gaya? Bahar sab nashta kar chuke h, to unko meethe ke lie Saundesh de aau?" Ma comes there nd sees saundesh on the plate nd smiles. Neeya takes it nd moves to go her mother stops her. "Ruk ja Shona."
Neeya looks back at her. "Tu rehn de mai de aaungi. Waise bhi Jo afwah gaon mai faili h uske baad kaun hi there haath se khaega." This hurts her. She looks down at her hands that were holding the tray and her bloody hands comes in front of her eyes making her anxious and shiver.
Before she can loose the hold on tray, Ma quickly holds it and goes from there to serve. But before going out she warns Neeya not to come out to dining hall in front of them.
Neeya looks on with teary eyes. And she moves and stoods at the door looking at her mother serving food to everyone including saundesh.
Her eyes falls on Anirudh who seems to be lost with expressionless face, but she knows, he was hiding it, his true emotions, emotion of feeling hurt.
"Are waah! Aaj to Anirudh ka manapasand misthaan bana h. Khake batao to, kaisa bana h?" Sujata(ma) serves him misthaan and Anirudh looks on. "Khao beta." Trilochan says bringing him out of his thoughts of previous night.
Anirudh nods and he takes it in the spoon and takes it in his mouth.
Neeya looks at him curiously to know whether he likes it or not.
As he was eating, he smiles a little at the heavenly taste of it.
Neeya looks at him smiling and suddenly she felt electric pass in her body making her smile little too.
Unhe accha laga..
"Bahut accha bana h kaki. Aisa saundesh shayad hi Maine kabhi khaya ho. Aapne banaya?" Anirudh ask and at this, Sujata looks back at the kitchen door quitely which didn't go unnoticed by Anirudh.
When he turns to the kitchen, his eyes falls on angel he desires for everytime. Neeya
And all the memories of previous night, knife in her hands, blood and he looks away.
"Maine banaya h chote Malik." Sujata answers.
Jhooth Anirudh nods his head and he keeps down the bowl and stands up. "Mera pait Bhar gaya hai. Aur ye saundesh mujhe Kuch khaas accha nahi laga." He specifically says last line looking at Neeya. He looks at her for few seconds and he can see her getting sad and hurt and he goes from there before he weakens.
*__________________*
Anirudh goes to the balcony and sits there.
The taste of saundesh was still there, lingering his mind. It would be a lie if he say he didn't want to eat the whole saundesh she made. It would be a lie that it didn't taste that good. It would be a lie if he says that he didn't want to go to her, hug her and console her. It would be a lie if he says that he wasn't hurt with what he did there, how he ignored her.
But his mind was still not able to accept what he saw yesterday. It was hard for him, too hard.
He recalls seeing her looking at him and Saudamini hugging each other and he did notice something in her eyes, jealousy?
He closes his eyes trying to take her out of his mind for a moment, just a second would be enough too to give him peace, but no, it wasn't possible. She was everywhere in his mind, in every corner. Even when he closes his eye, he still sees her, he can still feel her scent, hear her bangles and payal jingling sound. And it would be a lie to say he didn't felt anything.
Suddenly he felt a presence behind him. He knew who the person might be nd he was right. Neeya
He don't need to turn around to see who it was. He was that familiar with her aura. He stands and walks to the end of balcony and holds the grill tightly.
Neeya was standing there with a bowl of saundesh in her hands. She keeps the bowl on table. "Aap aisa q kr rhe h mere saath?" This question breaks his heart, but more than that, how much sadness and pain those voice held.
He deeply inhales and says sternly,"Mai kya kar rha hu?" Anirudh doesn't turn around. He has no strength to face her, to look at her hurt.
"Aap acche se jante h aap kya kar rhe h? Aap q mujhe is trh nazarandaz kar rhe h?"
"Aisa kuch nhi h." Anirudh says defending. Lier his mind answers him.
"Accha! Aisa kuch nhi h? To kal parso raat wali ghatna se q nhi baat kr rhe aap mujhse?. Q aise paish arahe h jaise mai hu hi nhi? Kaise mai khooni hu Q?" He doesnt answer but clutches his fist. He felt like someone just stabbed him.
"Bolie Anirudh ji. Q? Kya mujhse koi galti hui h? Kya maine kuch kia-"
"-HA!! Kia h tumne.! Jooth bola h tumne mujhse.!" Anirudh cuts her shouting on her facing her. Now was enough. He needs the answer now.
Neeya looks on, taken back, hurt. She looks at him, waiting that he might say he didn't mean it, but it never came out. Tears slipped off her eyes. "Jooth!?...Maine-" her tone was now soft, sad.
"-Ha tumne. Jooth bola h tumne mujhse Neeya. Q?" He holds her by her shoulder nd shouts on her, taking all his anger out on her,"Maine sabse jyada tum pe bharosha kia. Mujhe laga tha ki shayad tum aur mai sath milkar is samaaj mai badlaw la skte h...par nhi. Tum to...tumne to Subhash ji ke sath sath mere mann mai tumhare lie jo bharosha tha use bhi maar dala." Whatever he said, he whom she trust alot, he in whom she sees her father, he whom she started falling for felt like something hit her so hard. She looked in his eyes,"aap..??...apko lagta h ki mai aisa-" "-tumne aisa kar dia h!" His hold tightens making her flinch.
That's it! The remaining strength, the power girl that was inside her, was now broken. It was there cuz she believed that after her baba, there was Anirudh with her. But now, it was gone. Her world was shattered, her heart was now shattered into the broken piece. Her legs were weak but Anirudh's hold keep her standing.
Anirudh was still holding her by her shoulder,"Chodhie mujhe." Anirudh looks ath quivering lips. When that sad and broken voice came out of her mouth, he realized what he was doing, how tightly he held her.
He leaves her and stands there. But deep inside, he was cussing himself for doing that to her. His hand, that was holding her tightly giving her pain, were feeling heavy.
There was lump forming in his throat but he managed to control it.
"Q Neeya? Q kia?" "Mai nhi janti ki kisi ne apko kya kaha h? Aap q aisa soch rhe h par maine Subhash ji ko nhi mara h aur na hi apka bharosha toda h."
Anirudh was more frustrated now,"Tumhare baba ne sabko bhadkaya aur uski saza unko mili. Kamal kaka se bandook cheen ke mara tha na unhone khud ko. Q?" Neeya looks on more shocked. She stumbles back. "Qki tumhare baba ki asliyat sabke samne aagai thi. Aur unhe darr tha! Aur ab tum" he says pointing his finger towards her,"tum unki maut ka badla lena chahti ho aur tum bhi apne baba ke kadam pe hi chal rhi ho!......ab mujhe koi baat nhi karni tumse." Anirudh turned around not able to face her. He closed his eyes not able believe what he said to her.
Neeya closed her eyes letting all her tears fall down. When she opened her eyes, it was filled with hurt, nd nothing else. It felt like everything was spinning around her. She can feel the panic rising in her heart.
She wiped her tears away nd maintain herself and said,"Theek h! Mai chal rhi hu apne baba ke kadam pe aur chalungi. Aur ha, mere baba ne kabhi kisi ka boora nhi chaha.... Mere baba ne hi khud ko goli maari thi. Par maine apko nhi bataya. Pata h q? Qki-...Khair. Ab kya faida janke. Mujhe batana bhi nhi h apko ab. Maine apme apne baba ki parchai dekhi thi. Itna vishwas tha aap par mujhe " Anirudh looks on, still angry nd eyes closed. "Aapne kaha maine apka bharosha toda. Heh! Maine nhi, apne mera bharosha toda....aur yhi nhi. Apne aaj...humari dosti bhi todh dia apne."
Anirudh opens his eyes which was red and filled with tears. The fist that was holding the pillar, loosens.
'aaj humari dosti bhi todh dia apne'
These words kept ringing in his mind. Her friendship, her being with him means a whole world to him. But today, it was broken too...
Tears slip off his eyes. He just want to turn around and hug her and never let her go away but he know, it's all messed up.
. "Aur ab mai apke paas nhi aungi....kabhi nhi!" Nd she goes from there crying, with heavy heart.
Again, broken...another tear slip off Anirudh's eye and it doesn't stop. He stumbles down crying.
Nd there, Saudamini was watching all this from her window with her binoculars, smiling.
*__________________*
Neeya walks to the store room of haveli nd sits there crying all her heart out..
And there, Anirudh was also broken. He falls down on his knees crying in the balcony.
N:
Q Anirudh ji? Q?...Q apne aaj mera bharosha toda...q?
A:
Neeya...Tum to mujhe sab bata sakti thi na...phir q...
Neeya was sitting there, feeling all alone, hugging her knees nd crying.
There, Anirudh was on his knees with his face down when his eyes fall on Saundesh cooked by her. He takes the bowl in his hand nd with shaking hand, takes a bite. He closed his eyes letting all the tears fall nd enjoying the taste of it...
A:
Saundesh!..tumhe pata tha ki mujhe saundesh psnd h..tumne mere lie banaya bhi...shayad ab mai tumhe kabhi bata na pau...par tumhare hath ki bani saundesh..mere Zindagi mai sabse anmol h....
He eats it slowly taking in all the taste.
Both of them recalls all the moment they had together, whether it was sharing their emotions..helping her saving her Ma from sati or enjoying together...first meeting...or dancing nd playing in the rain...looking in each other eyes..
N:
Maine humesha socha tha ki koi...koi bhi mera sath de ya na de...par jab tak aap h... mujhe kisi ki jaroorat nhi...aaj mai apne baba ko khone ke baad...ek bar phir akeli padh gi Anirudh ji...
A:
Maine jo kaha...wo mai nhi kehna chahta tha....par...tumne mujhse jooth bola....q Neeya q?...
N:
Kaash mai apko bata pati...par apne..apne kaise doosro pe yakeen kar lia....kya bas itna hi bharosha tha apko mujhpe..
Both of them were feeling betrayed, heartbroken, feeling like never before... Both were sitting all alone crying.. They wanted to go to each other but...they weren't....
N:
Maine humesha aap ko khush dekhna chaha, aap pe vishwas kia bharosha kia...apke sath bitaye har pal mere jindagi ka sabse khubsurat pal h...aur apne...ek jhatke mai sab...
Neeya starts crying more badly..
A:
Shayad maine kabhi jana nhi...lekin ab keh skta hu...tum meri sabse acchi dost ho..jiske sath..bitaya hua har pal...kisi khubsurat lamhe se kam nhi....
{A/n...But was she only his best, close friend? Only friend?}
Anirudh was also crying sitting on the balcony with Saundesh in his hand, feeling somewhat guilty nd broken. Kya sach mai maine Neeya ko galat samjha?
N:
Anirudh ji....Ami....Tomake...Bhalobashi!!!(i love you)..nd she cries more nd more....
*〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️*