Song: heaven by Troye Sivan
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I was at my locker putting in books that I didn't need for my first few classes when cold lanky fingers covered my eyes and warm air blew on my left ear.
"Hey princess." The person whispered.
"Tyler!" I called excitedly while prying his hands off my eyes and turning to face him.
He chuckled and engulfed me in a bear hug.
"You came early?" I stated more than asked.
"Surprise?" He said.
"Hey! I'm here too" Blake pouted.
"Oh hey! Do I know you?" I joked.
"Ouch!" He gasped placing a hand over his heart.
"Shut up!" I said lightly and closed my locker.
"So, you had fun?" I asked Tyler as we walked towards our Biology class.
"Not really, my family can be overwhelming sometimes. Besides, I missed you guys." Tyler answered.
"Wow so cute." Blake said in a girly accent and pretended to dry his tears with the back of his hand.
They started to bicker back and forth but I tuned out of their conversation.
Today will be a good day to sleep through classes. I thought.
- - - - -
"FriYAY!" Tyler exclaimed, "who's up for a sleepover?"
It was finally Friday and we were walking towards the school's parking lot, relishing in our freedom from the jail that forces us to study things that we will never be using in real life.
"Hmm..." I tapped my chin pretending to think about his proposal, "let's see, do we get to paint each others nails and eat a lot of ice cream?", I asked half joking.
"Well duh!" Tyler replied almost immediately.
"No no no no. No painting nails." Blake shook his head with a horrified expression.
"Aww Blakey, you're no fun." I said ruffling his jet black hair and making them messier then before. "Don't worry, I'll paint your nails white. That way, you can match your room."
"Ha. Ha." He made a poker face as he unlocked his car and got in.
"Bye! See you at Blake's." Ty said and walked towards his car.
"Bye!" I said and got in the passenger seat of Blake's car.
We drove in silence for a while but Blake broke it by chucking lightly.
"What's so funny?" I asked furrowing my eyebrows.
"You know, Ty Ty has a new crush." He chuckled.
"Really? Who is it?" I asked.
"There was this boy in the park the other day, he was painting something on a canvas. And Tyler couldn't help but "admire" his "talent"." He said making air quotation marks with one hand while the other one was on the steering wheel.
"Cute." I said, "Do you have a crush?"
He momentarily glanced at me and then turned his attention back on the road before blushing?
"Maybe." He answered.
I chuckled at his flushed state.
Sometimes he was way too cute for his own good.
The car screeched to a halt and I realised we were already outside the apartment complex. Wow, that was fast. Ty was already there, getting out of his car. We got out and joined him.
"I won!" He cheered referring to the race that was never decided upon.
"Come on lover boy, let's go inside." Blake commented and walked towards the building.
"Shut up." Tyler said and he followed behind.
I followed suit.
"I gotta take a shower first. You two can decide a movie to watch till then oh! And make some popcorn too." Tyler announced as soon as we entered the apartment and rushed towards his room.
I plopped down on the sofa, exhausted from all the studying at school and started scrolling through my phone. While Blake walked towards the kitchen.
"Water?" Came his voice a few minutes later and I saw his outstretched hand with a glass of water in it.
"Thanks." I said realising that I was in fact quite thirsty.
"Ila..." He spoke so softly but with a pained edge to his voice, "What's this?" He asked.
"What?" I looked towards him only to find him glancing towards my left arm? Holy shit! How the hell did my sleeve get pulled up?
I yanked my sleeve down and looked away. Ashamed. Scared. Terrified.
"It's nothing." I managed to croak through the lump forming in my throat.
"Nothing?" He was breathing heavily.
I didn't dare meet his eyes, too afraid of what I might see in them.
"Why?" He asked.
Well, I don't know. Maybe because....I want to die? I thought bitterly.
"Blake please just forget about it. It's nothing." I quaked looking anywhere but his eyes.
"Forget about it? Tell me Ila! how do I pretend it's nothing when- when I know you do this to yourself?" He asked.
"Then kill me because I can't do this anymore." I blurted, finally meeting his eyes and I could have sworn I saw something crack in them.
"Do what?" He whispered.
Live.
"Nothing." I looked down, lips trembling, eyes brimming with tears that felt like lava.
"Just tell me, Goddamnit!" He said.
I remained silent. He took a ragged breath before continuing.
"Why can't you let me in?" He asked, "why do you always block me out?"
His voice was dripping with so much pain and sadness that I felt like my heart would cave in at any moment.
"I can't." I begged him to understand."It's too dark inside."
Silence.
"I let it slip." he said in a low voice, slouching against the couch, "I let it slip everytime, never pressured you to tell me anything even when I knew you weren't okay. But now, I can't. I can't see you do this to yourself?"
He ran his hand through his hair roughly and took in a deep breath.
"Why don't you understand?" He begged, "You're killing me."
I opened my mouth to say something, anything. But before I could do so, Tyler walked in the living room rubbing his hair dry with a towel. I straightened up and put a smile on my face instatly and so did Blake, for which I was very grateful.
"Everything okay?" Tyler asked with squinted eyes.
"Yeah." I said, "why?"
He shook his head as if dismissing a thought.
"Nothing. Who wants hot chocolate?" He asked cheerily.
"Is that even a question?" I said.
Tyler laughed at that.
"I'll be back with three heavenly cups of hot chocolate in a few." He said walking towards the kitchen.
"I'll help you." I got up quickly but was pulled by a hand on my wrist. Blake gave me a knowing look.
"We're not done talking about that." He spoke in a low tone so only I could hear him and then unclasped his hand from my wrist.
I walked towards the kitchen counter with a racing heart and a thousand merciless thoughts in my head.
"You okay? You look a little pale." Tyler asked when he saw me coming.
"Yeah." I said with what I assumed was a convincing smile but he looked unsure.
"Are you sure?" he asked trying to read my eyes or at least that's was I thought he was trying to do. I looked away abruptly.
"Yes, now hurry up and make hot chocolate." I spoke.
"Okay...." He said and turned towards the the counter mixing stuff.
_ _ _ _ _
[A/N: Ah! It's been a while since I've last uploaded. You can blame college and my terrible writer's block.
Anyway, here's another chapter. Hope you like it. Don't forget to vote and comment :) ]