quiero cabeza????
-I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight-
Jahseh Onfroy
"Are you okay?" Stokeley asked me for the seventh time.
"I'm fine Stokeley," I said again for the seventh time.
"Why didn't you tell me he raped you?" He asked. I tensed up and looked at the blankets on our bed.
"That's not something I was open to talking about," I stated.
"Yeah but I feel really bad, like when we first met and earlier in our relationship, I feel like I was sally pushy with us having se-"
"No stokeley." I stopped him. "It wasn't like that, we both wanted it, it was fine." I told him.
"Yeah but I was pushy a-"
"And so what? I love you and you never hurt me in that way. If you did, or ever do, Id tell you." I told him.
"Promise?" He asked.
"I promise, now can we stop talking about this please?" I asked. "It's making me uncomfortable."
"Yeah," he nodded his head. I looked up at him and I could tell there was so much more he wanted to say. But he was holding back.
I ignored it, not wanting to dig into my past at the moment.
I moved over to his lap and laid my head on his chest, straddling him. I stuck my thumb into my mouth.
Something is slipping away in me....
Stokeley:
Jahseh stuck his thumb in his mouth and then his eyes glossed over.
"Seh?" I rubbed his back.
He looked up at me with his thumb in his mouth, and grabbed a fistful of my shirt, he snuggled into his chest.
"Dada," he looked up at me with tears in his eyes.
"What's wrong baby?" I asked my two year old little.
Jahseh became a little some time during tour. It happened the first time when I took him to see Trolls in the movie theaters.
It didn't happen more than once a week, but recently he slips a lot. I think he just wants to escape reality. Because to be honest, our reality stinks right now.
I reached to his face and wiped some tears away, "shh shh don't cry baby." I told him.
"Dada bwad man," he cried.
"Who?" I asked.
"Bon-aw-tan (johnathan)" He quivered his lip.
"He won't hurt you no more," I promised. I'm going to kill that son of a bitch. I swear to god I will kill him.
"Pwognish, (promise)" He quivered his lips.
"I promise, now come on go to sleep baby," I wrapped my arms around him.
I laid back, and he stayed on my lap, straddling me while he laid his head on my chest.
30 minutes later
I laid Jahseh on the bed and grabbed my keys and phone off the nightstand.
He fell asleep about fifteen minutes ago, and I called Tay and asked him if they still had Blue in the warehouse.
They said they aren't letting him go anytime soon before he might snitch. They want to wait until he heals. But I wanna kill this son of a bitch.
I looked at Jahseh one last time before kissing hus hair and then walking out of our bedroom, leaving out of the house.
"Heading our so late?" Bruce, our security guard asked me as I walked out the front door.
"Uh yeah I'm just finna go meet with a friend real quick." I lied.
"Don't hurt him," Bruce gave me a bullshit look.
"I'm trying to protect him, I'm not going to hurt him." I stated and then walked out of the house, and began the short drive to Tays warehouse.
When I got there, it was quiet, but Tay and and Nahmir were there waiting for me.
"What's the plan?" Tay asked me as he led me to where he was keeping Blue.
"I'm going to kill him," I said coldly.
Nahmir laughed, "no balls."
"I'm not joking. You see a smile on my face?" I gave him a blank stare.
"Hey you don't gotta do it, I have no problem having someone handle it." Tay told me.
"Nah this is personal, I gotta do this myself," I said as we stopped at a door. It was metal with about six pad locks on it. I watched as Nahmir unlocked the door, opening it for me.
"Let me go!" I heard the cries of my enemy.
"Nah," I gave him a cold stare as the bright lights came on, making him close his eyes.
He was tied to a chair, with a pillow under his ass.
"Who are you?" He looked at me.
"Jahsehs boyfriend." I smiled.
"Oh," his eyes went wide.
"I just have a question," I lied as I approached him.
"I wanna know what went through your mind when you hurt my baby," I said as I was finally in front of him.
"We were in love!" He let out between long breaths.
I pulled my gun out of my pants and pointed it at his head.
"Aye no use this, if they find him and trace that bullet to your gun, that's yo ass," Tay said as he walked over to me and handed me a glock.
I nodded my head, putting my gun back in my pants and then taking the gun from Tay.
"Man him and his mans crazy as fuck," I heard Nahmir chuckled.
"That's the best way," I mumbled and looked back at blue.
"He doesn't love you, he hates you," I told him.
"He loved me enough to have my baby." Blue smirked.
A baby?
My heart dropped to my ass, "what baby?" I pointed the gun at him.
"He was pregnant," blue stated. "I don't know what happened to the baby though."
"You're lying." I hoped to god he was lying.
"What do I got to lie for, I'm half dead what do I have to lose?"
He's got a point.
"When was this?" I asked.
"The night of the party."
"Man I was deep in his guts, he's a scre-" I cut him off, putting a bullet through his head.
I don't wanna hear shit he had to say.
And I feel some type of way, knowing he got Jahseh pregnant. What did happen to their baby?
"You good?" Tay asked.
"Yeah." I gave him his gun back and started to leave.
What the fuck.