Dušica's P.O.V.
Sam was giving me a cold shoulder all day long, I know I was a little distant and cold lately, but what happened all of sudden. God, I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
I forgot my equipment for practice at home so I just decided to skip last period and go to get it. I could just call someone to get it for me but I wanna take my mind of some stuff...
I came home, asked Willy to prepare a car and went into my room. I showered real quick and dressed my jersey took my bag and went downstairs. I took out my phone and realized it was off.
"Fuck" I mumbled and turned it on.
Just when it was on I had like hundred messages and missed calls from Sam, Mia and Elena. I was about to call Sam and see what's going on when my phone rung again, it was Mia.
"Hey, Mia wha-" I answered and opened door of house to walk out when I was cut off by yelling.
"Thank god!" Mia's voice was heard like she was standing right there, I looked at my phone and turned around and saw her and Elena getting out of her car. Oh, now that make sense.
"What's up?" I asked but she just ran towards me and hugged me tightly.
"I'm sorry" she whispered, her voice breaking like she was crying. She remembered.
"It's okay" I said and caressed her hair "Please don't cry"
"No, It's not okay" she said and pulled away when Elena came and took my hand in hers, I smiled lightly and she kissed my cheek "I'm so sorry baby" she whispered and I nodded, I honestly didn't know what to do or say, It's not their fault, I mean they don't have to remember everything right? I just sat down on stairs in front of house and zoomed out while looking, well, somewhere I guess..
"I was too busy with my life that I totally forgot something that important. I was shocked when Sam came to me this morning. God, I'm such a bad friend!" She said and sighed "Will you ever forgive me?"
"Jeez, Mia, chill. First of all you didn't do anything wrong, it could happen to anyone and I am not mad, okay? And second, Sam talked to you?" I asked and tilted my head aside.
They laughed a little, even Elena mumbled ''whipped" under her breath but I just pretended like she didn't hear that, and Mia nodded.
"Yeah, she was freaking out" Mia said and I pulled her by shirt and she was down next to me which made Elena laugh.
"Talk" I said simply and Lena said on my other side putting her hand on my tight.
"Girl was so worried about your behavior, she thought you were going to break up with her"
"WHAT!?" I jumped on my feet, god I was so shocked! "Did she - did she really think that?" I asked and Mia nodded. I just sighed and run hand through my hair.
"But then I remembered why you are like this and I told her" she added and I stared at her like she is on some drugs or something like that.
"You told her?" and she nodded again.
"Dear god" I mumbled "Come on, we have to go" I said and practically dragged them in Mia's car and shut the door.
"Wait, why don't you go with us?" Mia asked after opening the window.
"Sam came with me this morning so" I said with shrug and turned around and climbed in my car.
"I told you, whipped" Elena said to Mia and they laughed.
"I HEARD THAT!" I yelled with smile and they laughed even more.
"That was the point" she said before I turned on the engine and drove past them with middle finger up in sky.
Honestly, if you ask me, I was a little sad Sam thought I would leave her. What the actual fuck? I meannnn why would I ever do something like that? I'd probably be out of my mind if I ever even think about doing something like that, I mean come on!
I was already in front of school, waiting for the two to come. After few minutes they were finally here.
"You ready?" Mia asked and I shook my head.
"I don't know actually"
"Come on, everything is going to be just fine" Elena said with smile and hand on my back, like she was leading me.
We opened door of changing room and my eyes were immediately met with the blue ones in which I could stare all day long. Mia looked at Elena and nodded and they left.
I walked towards Sam, the two left us alone, well there was few more girls but who cares.
Sam opened her mouth to say something but it looked like words just couldn't roll over here lips. It was cute actually, I couldn't help but smiled a little.
"Mia told me" I said but sadness was heard in my voice. Damn, I don't want that, I don't want her to feel guilty but bitterness in my voice will make her feel just like that. I hate myself right now.
"I-" she started but was cut by yelling of Ms. Rose.
"Get out already, we have to start!" She yelled and I smiled at Sam, I put my hand on her elbow.
"I have to go, but we'll talk later, okay?" I asked and she just nodded before I walked away.
***
All time during practice I could feel eyes on me, there was no need to turn around and see who that was, I already knew. Oh by the way, since Kendall kissed me that day, she stopped talking to me. And honestly, that's for the best. Anyway, this is finally done and I'm so sweaty eww. I'm tired and just wanna go home and sleep but I know I have to talk with Sam.
Someone grabbed my elbow and spun me around. Of course it was her, she looked really worried and I hated seeing her like that.
"Can we, like, talk now?"
"I really need a shower, I mean look at me-" and I heard her mumble "I am" while biting her lip "I'm all sweaty" I finished and tilted my head aside.
She blushed adorably and I giggled. I caressed her cheek and she leaned on my hand.
"Hurry up then" she said, eyes closed.
"Will do, ma'am" I said and kissed her cheek, I heard her laugh when I left.
Everything's going to be fine, I told to myself.
***
Once I walked out in my underwear, only Sam was there. She was drying her arms and neck after shower. She only had her jeans and bra on, and honestly she looked better than ever. She looked up and smiled.
"Where are everyone?" I asked and took my jeans.
"I may or may not throw them out" she said casually and I glared at her which made her roll her eyes "What? I don't like them seeing you like that" she added and motioned at my body without any clothes, except underwear, on.
We dressed up quickly in silence. I sat down on bench and pulled Sam into my lap. She wrapped her hands around my neck, while mine were around her waist, and smiled sadly.
"I'm sorry" she whispered "I'm so sorry baby"
"Shh" I said while caressed her cheek "It's okay, babe. You didn't know, it's not your fault, please don't worry about that" I added and kissed her nose which made her smile "Also, I want to apologize as well for my behavior" but she cut me off by shaking her head like crazy.
"No, no, please there's nothing to apologize for, if I only knew I'd be more supportive and-" I just kissed her to shut her up.
"You are amazing!" I said and she tightened her grip around me. "But did you really think I'm going to break up with you?" I asked with raised eyebrow and she looked down a little embarrassed.
"Maybe" she mumbled and I lifted her chin so she could look at me.
"Baby, you know how much I love you, you mean everything to me"
"I know, but I'm just insecure, I guess"
"Why?" I asked while playing with her hair and looking her straight in the eyes.
"Because" she stopped for second like she was thinking about that "Because, I kinda never had something this good in my life, you know, and I don't really know how to act about that, and trust me when I say that you are the best thing I have ever had in my life " she said shyly and I smiled a little.
"I love you" I whispered and kissed her lips gently, she answered immediately. Guess we were smiling too much that we just had to pull away. "But there is still something I have to tell you" I said and she tilted her head a little waiting for me to continue. I took deep breath and "I'm leaving"
"What?" she asked and moved away from me, leaving me to miss her warmth. "What do you mean by leaving?"
"I'm leaving for London" I said and wrapped my hands around me, literally hugging myself.
She bit her lip and kneeled down in front of me, taking my hands in hers.
"I understand" she said "But how long?"
I shook my head "I don't know, it may be just for a weekend or maybe whole next week, I don't know, I'll see how I'll feel" I said and she nodded in understanding.
She kissed my knuckles "Promise you'll call every day"
I gulped and lift her up "Look" I started "I was wondering, if you'd, maybe, I don't know" I looked down and sighed, playing with the sleeve of my hoodie.
"Babe, calm"
"Would you like to come with me?" I asked and she smiled, big smile.
"God, I thought you'll never ask" she said playfully and I smacked her arm.
"But seriously, I know this might sound weird, but I'd like you to meet her, I mean, you know... Never mind."
"I understand, baby" she said and kissed my forehead while cupping my cheeks, which made me close my eyes. "And, I'd love that too"
Dear god, how much I love this girl.
***
It's Thursday already and Sam and I are in plane for London. My parents aren't coming because they are still devastated, I've seen mom crying every day this week and that makes me even sadder, dad is trying to stay strong, at least for mom but he can't. Even I hadn't been for these few years, but I thought it's time now.
Sam doesn't talk much, I guess she knows how I feel so she is just holding me in her arms which are more comfy than anything.
We are lying on bed, my head on her chest and her hands in my hair.
"How do you feel?" she whispered and I shrugged, I don't really know how to answer on that. She kissed top of my head and I smiled. I think, if you want me to be honest, she is the only thing that keeps me alive. I don't know, you probably won't get it, what more could I possibly need in my life right?
Ugh I just wanted to sleep, but I couldn't even close my eyes because of all freaking thoughts that were running through my mind.
It looks like Sam eventually fell asleep so I slowly got up and walked out of room. I sat on armchair that looks through the window and took my headphones and book, just to take my mind off of things.
***
We were landing in few minutes and Sam was still sleeping so I decided it was time to wake her up.
She was so cute, with her hair all over her face. I honestly didn't even want to wake her up but I had to. I sat down next to her and gently shook her shoulder.
"Baby" she shook her head which made me smile "come on, princess, wake up"
"Just five more minutes" she said and put her hand on my leg "please"
God, how much I just wanted to let her sleep, but you know I can't, don't hate me!
"Come on sleepyhead, we are almost there" I said and she sighed then peaked.
"So fast" she mumble and sat up.
I put strain of her blonde hair behind her ear and smiled "You are so pretty" I whispered and kissed her nose.
"I just woke up, and you are already making me blush" she said and put her head on my shoulder.
"That's my job, beautiful." I whispered in her ear "Come on now, we have to go"
***
We came in hotel, I didn't really want to go to our house you know, so we are here. No one works for us here actually. We'll spend the night here and tomorrow, well we'll see what will happen. Honestly, I was soooo tired, but you could see Sam was as well even though she slept.
"I am so sleepy" I said when we were in the elevator and Sam nodded.
"I know baby" she said and kissed my cheek, which instantly made me smile, seriously this girl makes me forget all the bad things.
We got ready for bed and Sam immediately lay on top of me.
"I love you, Mickey" she whispered and I smiled "I love you too, Minnie"
***
H
ere we are. Driver drove us here, I was sitting silently whole time, Sam's hand was on my tight but I couldn't, I just couldn't speak nor talk. After all this time, coming here now was really hard for me. Here we are standing before the gate.
I bit my lip but tears were already running down my cheeks. Sam reached for my hand and I took a deep breath.
"It's okay, baby, you can do this" she whispered and I nodded.
She is right, I can, and my sister deserves this. We walked a little while I was trying to find her grave. I was holding white roses, her favorites, so tight that my left hand started bleeding but I didn't even care.
Finally, I found it and some wilted flowers were there.
"Weird" I whispered and sat down the roses.
It was cold, it was really really cold right now. This is London and I'm glad it's not raining.
I sat down and looked at her picture.
"I miss you" were first words I could say, I was crying so hard right now that I even could easily choke. Sam put her hand on my shoulder and I smiled a little without looking at her. "Your monkey's here. I'm sorry, I am so sorry I didn't come before. You know it was hard for me, but it's not an excuse I know I know. I miss you so much, every day. I just miss how you always used to cheer me up. You were the only person that really believed at me and helped me through every bad period in my life" I don't know how I survived all this words, they are just running out of my mouth like I don't control anything. "Mom and dad miss you too, they try to act strong just for me but sometimes they are failing and I don't know what to do."
I looked up at Sam that was standing next to me and smiled.
"Also, I wish you were here so you could get a chance to meet the most amazing person I have ever met, no offense. This is Sam" I said and took her hand while she smiled "My girlfriend"
"Hey" she mumbled "believe it or no, Dušica talks about you a lot, all good don't worry" she said and I laughed a little between sobs. She looked at me seriously and than at Alex's grave "I know how much you cared about her and don't worry, I won't hurt her in any way, I promise" Sam finished and kissed my cheek then wiped away my tears.
"I think, if you are still here, I would be most scared to tell this to you, you know how much I cared about your opinion and I don't know how I'd deal with you being against it. And I really hope you would be fine with this"
"Oh, trust me she wouldn't mind at all" unfamiliar voice come from behind which made both, me and Sam, jump.
I turned around just to see girl, I guess about 20 years old? Her eyes were puffy and red like she was crying. She was holding white roses in her arms.
"Excuse me, but who are you?" I asked and she smiled sadly.
"I am, well, I was Alex's girlfriend"
A/N: Well hello there, beautiful people. Here's a nice/sad update for you, tell me what you think!