→ pt. 2 of the previous imagine/chapter thing !!
☆ also !! i completely re-wrote 'a lovely mess' and then started it's sequel 'echoes in my mind' so if you guys check those out and vote etc then i'll do a follow spree or smth !! :)
(( also this is another side note but my tattoo is at the healing stage where it itches and holy heck i hate this bc all i wanna do is itch it but i can't and it's drIVING ME INSANE OMG hurRY UP W HEALING ALREADY THANK ))
// words: 870
the words swam through your head, "matty healy running off stage crying" and you knew it was all because of you. because you couldn't deal with matty's life and blamed him for everything.
no, you thought, i can't go back to him, not now.
you were having a battle against yourself, it was a constant war in your head ever since you left. one side was screaming, "why did you leave?" while the other was saying, "it was the right thing." and you had no idea which one to believe anymore.
it drove you insane, not being next to matty. because he was your comfort, your warmth, your safeguard, your home.
flashbacks filled your head, of the first night you met him in a bar, he was drinking his sorrows away from an ex who had cheated on him and he had found a sense of ease in your touch.
you were both hooked from then on, taking in as much of each other as you possibly could, but maybe - you had had too much.
it wasn't that you didn't love matty, because you did. you loved him so much it hurt you physically to the point you thought your heart would burst, but maybe that's the case.
you loved him so much, you had to let him go.
it was nearly two weeks later, when you heard the familar knock on your door. you only knew one person who knocked like that. you walked towards to door and turned the knob, opening the door to see none other than matty.
"y/n." he spoke softly, his voice was hoarse and dry, and his eyes were red and puffy like all he'd done was cry.
"what do you want, matty?"
he walked towards the doorway more and you let him in, for fear of the neighbors talking if you had a argument in the hallway.
"i want you, i want you back, y/n." he pleaded, "i'll do anything."
he was crying again and you'd never seen matty this vulnerable, he never let his gaurd down. it wasn't him. but to do it around you and to the point where he would do anything, it astonished you.
"matty, i can't. that's your life, not mine. and i'm just holding you back from it."
tears were flowing onto your cheeks as you spoke each word and more were flowing. you didn't want too, of course you didn't.
who wants to let go of the love of their life?
"baby, y/n. i don't care. if it means loosing you, the most important thing in my life than fuck everything else. yeah i know touring is my dream, the band, everything. but so are you. and if doing that means i lose you, then i don't want it." every sentence he spoke he moved closer, like he did before.
he closed the gap of space between you, touching your face so softly he thought you might shatter instantly.
"what will the fans say? the boys? everyone?" you questioned as you looked up at him. of course you wanted him to quit and stay with you, but it wasn't that simple. it never is.
"they'll be mad. but it's my life, not theirs. and if i want to spend the rest of my life by your side, so be it."
you stood there for a long time, thinking on his words.
would it be worth it? going back to him but knowing he'd be giving up his life dream for you?
"matty, i don't think-"
he cut you off, "it's my choice, y/n. and i choose you."
his thumb brushed your cheek, you looked into his eyes and you saw something - something you'd only seen once in matty's eyes the entire time you've known him: pure, unconditional love.
you knew he wasn't lying, of course he wouldn't. you just wanted him to be happy no matter what.
then you thought, "matty, maybe you won't have to give anything up." he stared at you with a puzzled expression.
"i'll deal with the tours and fans, as long as you keep doing what you love. and so i can be with you too."
he registered your words, letting each syllable sink in before he broke into an ear-splitting grin and spun you around.
"thank you." he whispered in your ear.
he kissed you repeatedly and spoke of how much he loved you.
"i love you." he whispered against your lips before connecting them once more.
"i love you." you replied back; letting his lips mould with yours.
and you truly did.
//
idk if i like this one or the 1st part more hm ??