When school started back up at the end of that summer, I was disappointed. The summer of 2012 was one of the more memorable. I lost a lot of weight, was feeling good about myself, got a car, did a lot of things... but I loved the amount of writing I got in. Going back to school ruined that. I went back to the same schedule of updating Handcuffed Love. However, just because I couldn't update like before didn't make me any less excited when I did.
Throughout the summer, I started to figure out where this story was headed. At the beginning, I had Albany struggling with drugs. Now, this is where writing can sometimes be tricky, if you don't know much about the subject. And I didn't. I don't do drugs, never had. That's why it was hard for those several chapters to try and get into her head. I knew it would be intense, her trying to escape, resist... I admit I wish I played it out better though. I didn't show just how desperate it made Albany - but of course, that's something to fix later on. Another thing I should probably fix... was the clarity that it was obvious she wasn't having withdrawal from the weed. A lot of people were confused about that. I made it look as if she thought she was in pain because of the weed even though I knew that can't technically happen, getting addicted to weed. She got addicted to cocaine. Even though I wanted to show people that Albany makes mistakes and can be ignorant a little through this at this point, it came across as me just being dumb and not knowing the different effects. So, I should probably clarify that too.
But clarity... is something that can be a let down too. I want to get people thinking and wondering what is going to happen next. That's why I kind of began to add in that issue with Mark. Things were meant to get complicated as time went on. And it's not to make her get abused for no reason. It's to show her strength. I made it a point that Albany doesn't cry. I'm not saying that is a weakness but in her mind, it can be the start of weakness. She is very tough at this point and I wanted her to show that she is strong - and it's because of her past. The book started when she got home so you don't see directly what happened to her before that. That's why it is important to show a character's personality, their strength, and what they find important when it comes to being strong. It reflects on the possibilities of her past and again, it gets the mind going... like what exactly happened to her? Then slowly, you start to unveil it only to bring up something that gets more questions rolling.
Her strength shows what she went through. But the fact that she finds Luke to be the point of her vulnerability make things interesting. I didn't want to start with a story with romance right away; rather, I want to gradually establish some type of connection. And that connection needed to happen between two completely different people. It would be boring if Albany became interested in someone exactly like her. That's why her and Luke connect, because they are so different and it's because of that that creates a balance. She speaks her mind at the beginning and doesn't like showing how she feels. She is sarcastic and witty. Luke, however, is more held back in that aspect. He doesn't mind speaking his feelings really and isn't as sarcastic as Albany is, not as open to sharing a ridiculous opinion. But as the story comes along in the early chapters... that's what brings them together very slowly as friends. Luke has the seriousness she didn't and she has the carefree and dark nature he didn't want to really embrace at first. So those difference resulted in a strange bond, in a sense. Even more so was their deep similarities. How neither will give up in a fight, how they both crave control... both need to be in control. And how sometimes, that can be too much and then they crave destruction at the same time. That hidden want to just let everything go and fade away with it without showing the miserable side to that.
It's these things that bring them together initially into that rocky friendship. But once things between them begin to develop, like a good understanding of each other, I planned to have them slowly start to transform with the traits the others had (for example, much later in the book, Albany possesses the responsibility she didn't have before and Luke shows his humor more).
Just as I was diving into the next part of the book, after she is done with the withdrawal, school starts and it slowed me down. I was starting 11th grade. I found it to be so funny that my little brother, that was going into the 7th grade, ended up getting that same teacher I confessed I had a crush on. Yeah. My brother, Brian, had that same guy in class three times a day. I swear, it was just funny. Of course, that wasn't my first English teacher I had a crush on either (10th grade, I had another crush on a different English teacher I had; don't judge guys. At least I didn't tell that guy I had a crush on him like the last).
This was 11th grade though and those teachers were behind me. In front of me were new classes and a lot of homework. But I still found time to write. It sucked, how I needed to wait until nobody was around to write. During the summer, I had enough chances because my mom wasn't home but at work during the day. She just got that new shift... and during the summer, that was great. She was gone, 6 - 3 and during that time, I would write as much as I could before she got home. Now though, she was at work when I was at school. So it was tricky to fit much writing time in without her knowing. Sometimes, I didn't hide it. A lot of the time, I said it was homework (which it usually was... I would just go back and forth doing that and writing on Wattpad).
I tried my best nonetheless... I was getting more excited about the story as the time past. I was trying to think about possible ways to go about having Albany escape, how Luke would defend Clare, and how the summer would be spent bonding together. I wanted Albany to be the one to usually not get the upper hand when fighting Clare, even through she can beat her. I wanted to show Clare winning because then, it would put Luke in a very specific position. He would have to believe his wife, stay loyal to her. That's something else that drew Albany to Luke. He was incredibly loyal to his wife, even when she could tell that his heart wasn't into it. Because, despite her blunt nature, she liked people that stayed strong and were loyal (even if she was in fact a rebel). A lot of people at this time really didn't like Luke, which I found kind of funny because I figured it would have the opposite reaction. A lot of my readers were upset that he just wouldn't open his eyes to what was really happening. At the same time, that was kind of the point. It was frustrating, yes, but it showed the impact Clare had on Luke and how loyal he was... to the point where he refused to buy what Albany said. He was blind. But he was being blind because he was all about doing the right thing, especially when he could feel he wanted the wrong thing, if that makes sense.
I made Albany mad because though she is incredibly understanding, it's almost as if she just doesn't want to be at times. Yet, at the same time, I wanted her to deal with that. She buried herself in drugs in the past, didn't hang out with the right group, and didn't have the best values at hand because she wasn't taught any better. But with Luke, as her exception, with his impact, she would deal with him not believing her. Even though it hurt because he was turning out to be the one person she could trust, she knew he wouldn't fully trust her. And it hurt, especially when she barely lets anyone in to begin with. She however recognized her 'getting pathetically fluffy' and wasn't sure how to feel about it. She just knew that she felt different and wanted her time with Luke over the summer to last.
That's how I started to slowly introduce the reality of just how much she missed out on. By the fun things Luke and her would do that she never did before. Like golfing - which was just fun for me to write, because Albany is very amusing naturally and everything looks new and big to her in a way. And camping, when that came around.
But even though she wasn't experienced in much, when I introduced Patrick early on then later the people from her old friends that beat her up... I tried showing her past catching up with her - a constant in this story. When Luke first arrested Patrick, he began to realize what she had been in before. And it was during this for the first time, Luke showed a different side of him. A side that came out thanks to Albany he didn't have before. He beat Patrick up on the shoulder of the road, the first time in which he lost his temper at seeing the harassment aimed at Albany (even when he didn't realize he was somewhat of an alternative contributor too).
It was around this time I believe that I began to think... that this could easily become three books not one. I always thought about it but didn't consider it. The plan was to write it and end the book with Clare in jail and Albany and Luke together. But... that just seemed way too fast, too easy, and too predictable. This, I knew, was a very unique story and I loved it very much. So... with how their relationship is slowly growing and how gradual Albany is moving up in her life... I figured three books would be perfect for this story. Not just because of the character's personal developments. But of just how many ideas I had for this story too I wouldn't be able to express if I only made this into one book. So many different twists I wanted to take, and really elaborate on. Two books would even be enough once I really started to think about it. Three would be for the best, especially with what I had planned to happen at the end of the second book. Because really, you can't end the second book with the ideas I had and not make a third which I could already tell would kill me if I didn't write three. The ideas stretched and could span out perfectly. It was up to me to make it happen.
So, with really thinking over whether this would be the right thing - to make three books and spend a good guess of over three years on this one story - I decided. And yes, I would happily spend three years on this. Because the story was just that intriguing to me.
And... since that became the case, I needed book names that would match up with what is happening in the story. The tittle Handcuffed Love... that just was not the story I realized after starting to write it. It wasn't about love and if it came, it wouldn't be any time soon. So I just decided to shorten it to Handcuffed. Because love isn't what is holding her prisoner or Luke for that matter. She is in a tight position thanks to many different aspects. Like where she is at with society, with nobody believing her, with how she can't seem to make a run for it. With going through withdrawal, acceptance, school, her old friends, and her relationships with people in general.
It was at this time when I came up with the name of the last two books too. The second book, I decided at that point, would be called Fractured. The third... is a surprise for whoever reads this now since I didn't start it yet. But it's a little different from the first two titles, which does fit because the third book, I figured out would be very different than the two before it.
After coming up with the titles, I soon had all three covers made, which only made me that much more of a spaz in excitement. I felt accomplished and ready for this and was happy to have this challenge. After all, my very first story idea was one that would have expanded into several books. That's why I was on Wattpad; to build up to something like that. And a trilogy would not only be fun and one hell of an experience, it would be one large step towards writing long series.
All these ideas for those future stories in the series in my head... very exciting. Of course, one step at a time. I was still reeling over writing Handcuffed, after all.