Josh was feeling nervous now that 4 o'clock was rolling around. What if they weren't as accepting as Sam and Chris had been? He was wearing his mask. Even though Sam and Chris both said he looked fine. Good, even. He had decided it was better not to show the scars on first meeting. He was currently waiting with Chris in the living room.
"You okay?"
He smiled, always so keen to be kind his Chris was. "Nervous."
"Anything I can do?"
"Hold my hand, Cochise." His mocking tone only got a small smile out of Chris. Then their fingers were laced together. He looked from their fingers to Chris. The blonde was about to speak but their was a knock on the door. Sam let the, what sounded like, two people in.
Mike met his eyes and hugged Jess to his side. Sam spoke softly to them both and Mike was the first to nod. They slowly approached. It was silent for a bit. He was unsure of how to start.
"I thought you were dead. I'm so sorry." Mike's head hung.
Josh looked up at him silently for a minute. "No, I'm really sorry-"
"No don't, in hindsight you didn't do anything. I don't blame Jess or wendigos on you. I'm actually really glad you made it out."
"Josh" The voice was so broken and small. He turned his attention to Jessica. "Why do you have that mask on?"
He looked away at this. "I uh, I got pretty hungry up there." It was silent again.
"You are okay now, though?" The frail voice asked. He looked at her and slowly nodded, "Can I see?" For some reason he was comfortable lifting the mask off his face. "Oh, Josh" She looked sad. He ran his fingers over the distorted skin.
Mike was the one to reach out and put a hand on his knee cap. "I am so sorry we left you. Just like-"
"She never came back for me." Josh hadn't really talked about this part. He liked to avoid it. "She took me to the mines. but she never came back." It was awkward to speak around his sharp teeth but he knew they could see them. Jessica's eyes were following them.
"Yah, we uh, we burned her. She can rest easy now."
He nodded with a smile. "Thank you, Michael."
They were so kind. Of course they hadn't been a big part of his game. Mike had been involved but for different reasons.
When Matt and Emily showed up Emily was not pleased. It was Jessica's soft broken voice that actually calmed her down. He guessed she was the most traumatized, so everyone was careful with her. And when she trusted someone they all knew it was okay. Matt and Emily took his apology and he actually got one from Emily about his sisters, at this Mike chimed in. Their apology made him tear up. It meant a lot to hear.
When Ash showed up is when it all when down hill. Chris on the one hand was not happy to see her. Ans Ash was not happy to see Josh.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" She shook her head.
"Ashley" Chris spoke first.
"No no, I'm not listening to his bullshit."
"Ash!" Mike glared. "Hes not going to hurt you. Alright?" She kept her distance though.
"Ash, I can't even put into words how sorry I am for what I put you and Chris through." He tried to look her in the eyes but she wouldn't.
"He may forgive you but I won't"
Chris stood up at this, "Ash, we left him starving. When I found him he was becoming a wendigo. That is nothing compared to some prank. No matter how scared we were. We left him to a fate worse then death."
"Bullshit." Josh opened his mouth to speak but she gasped. " Oh my god his teeth!" She covered her mouth.
Once again silence befell them. "Ash. I know I hurt you, but I hope you can forgive me." He spoke gently.
She shook her head. "No, no way. I'm leaving." She was already turning to go.
"Hey, you tried right, bro?"
Josh only nodded. If Ash didn't want to be near him it was understandable.
"Hey who needs her." Emily crossed her arms.
"How about we get some drinks going, huh?" Sam was already passing around cups.
It didn't take long for everyone to get a buzz going. For everything to return to seemingly normal. Josh had decided that his drugs and alcohol probably didn't go together. So, no alcohol for him. Chris on the other hand had taken a few drinks. The blonde had always was a light weight. Ever since they had had their first taste in freshman year of High school. Chris stumbled into Josh and sat down next to him on the couch.
"H-having a good time, babe?" Chris gave him a sweet smile. Babe? What was going on? Whatever it was it sent his stomach fluttering.
"Yah, feels like old times." Chris was staring at his lips. "Dude?"
"Sorry. You're just really attractive."
"You're really drunk, Chris." He smiles at the blonde.
"Yah, I am." Chris laughs, "but I'm supposed to tell you I'm in love with you."
Shit. That was Chris's voice right? Yah it was. Shit. But Chris was drunk. Its not true. "Dude, you are super drunk."
"Doesn't mean what I say isn't true. Iss still me, my protective walls juss down."
"I guess." Not sure that was really true but he vaguely remembered seeing it somewhere in a textbook. Chris was leaning in. Not good. He put his hand on Chris's chest. "Look, Chris. You're protective wall or whatever is down. I want the real non drunk you."
Chris laughed as he pulled himself away. "Right, well tell me what I told you. Remind me and we'll talk about it when I'm sober."
Josh smiled. "Okay."
"Good, can I at least dance with you?"
"Chris, theres no music even playing."
"Yah, but we can slow dance to nothing."
Was that a good idea? Probably not but Chris wouldn't remember anyways. "Okay."
He was pulled to his feet and into Chris's arms. Chris was tall and lean. Always had been. He kept his hands on Chris's shoulder blades. Chris's hands went straight for his waist. His breath hitched as Chris nuzzled into his neck. He expected to be kissed there but Chris only nuzzled in. Josh lightly put his chin on the taller boys shoulder.
They swayed together. A sleepy rhythm that had his eyelids feeling heavy. Sam was whispering to Jessica. She gave him a thumbs up and he smiled back. Jessica giggled.
"Hey, we should head home."
"But I'm having such a good time, Josh." Chris's hot breath against his neck made him shiver.
"You need rest, c'mon." He slid out of the other mans grasp. He helped Chris to the car and drove them home. He was a bit rusty but got the hang of it again pretty fast. There was no way he was going to let Chris drive them home anyways. Once home Chris collapsed into bed and Josh had to help him with his shoes.
At some point during the night a less drunk Chris threw an arm over him. He took it as an invitation and curled up with the other man.
***
It was about 2 o'clock. Chris was at the table, The side parallel to the back wall. Filling out paper work. Nothing had been said about last night. Josh had hoped Chris would address it by himself but it didn't look like that would happen anytime soon.
"Chris?"
The blonde looked up over his glasses at Josh, realized he could not see and looked up fully. "Hm?"
"We need to talk about last night." Chris blushed, so he did remember. "You said I could ask so I am."
"Josh, look, I was drunk and-"
Rage was the first thing that boiled up in him. He was so tired of this shit. He felt like he was being used and stood up. Chris was always saying Josh didn't deserve anything bad that happened. So why was Chris being such a dick? He could feel the anger and confusion take control. He flung the papers off the table and they fluttered downwards.
"Hey!-" Chris let out a heavy breath. Josh always had felt stronger after the mountain. He assumed it was left over from being a wendigo. This really only proved a point. He pushed the table forwards. Chris's chair was slammed against the wall with him in it. Pinning the blonde with the table. Chris's face turned from surprise to fear.
"Listen here you flip flopping piece of wishy washy garbage." He pointed a finger to the blonde. "You are being a giant dick. One minute you say you aren't sure and then the next you invite me into your bed? You hold my hand, you comfort me. You say you love me and dance with me like we are something. Like WE matter. Then you say it was all bullshit!? Chris I can't take this. You have to pick yes or no. I can't live with having you sometimes and then you leaving whenever you want! You and I both know I need stability. I need yes or no, Chris. Not a 'maybe' or a 'whenever I feel like using you cause you are in love with me.' You yourself said that when you are drunk your wall is down but everything you say is how you really feel. So don't pull any of that drunk excuse shit on me."
Josh aggressively shoved a hand in his pocked and yanked out an orange bottle. The craving was back. In his anger he wanted to rip Chris apart. He jerked the top off and crunched a pill with his sharp teeth. The taste didn't bother him. The blonde looked from the bottle up to him.
"Shit, Chris, we have known each other for way to long. Why would it be so bad?"
"It wouldn't be bad. I just don't want to loose you, you know? If it doesn't work out." Chris's voice was small. It was silent for a good minute before Chris pushed the table a bit to free himself.
Once free the blonde stood in front of Josh. "I'm sorry." The other man cupped his cheeks. "I love you, Josh." Chris brought their lips together. Josh immediately responded. They moved slowly, Chris's hands went from his face to his hips. Josh wrapped his arms around the blondes neck. It felt kind of weird to be kissing his best friend but it also felt real and solid. They had shared plenty of things that they didn't like or did like. It made it easier now. He knew Chris liked long drawn out kisses.
"Fucking finally, Cochise." Josh grinned as they pulled away.
Chris only smiled and closed the distance again. This kiss was deeper. Chris's hands gripped his hips and the next thing he knew his back was against the wall. Desperate is what Josh would call this.
OoOoOh, he liked that. Chris had wedged a thigh between his own. His hands gripped Chris's hair and neck as he rutted down into the offered leg. Finally a bit of friction. Chris was hard too, he could feel it.
The blonde was the first to pull away. Their breathing was ragged. Uneven together. "Shit" Chris smiled slightly.
Josh smiled smugly, "Wow, didn't know you had it in you, Cochise."
Chris blushed. "We should stop. You know, for now."
"Aw, not going to take me to the bone zone, bro?" He grinned at his own stupid joke.
"No," Chris laughed and rolled his eyes.
Josh leaned forward and pushed their lips back together.