MAMA SAID

It Was Me

Here are the scraps y'all asked for. Will it be short? Yes! Will y'all be upset? Absolutely. Didn't thoroughly edit this. All mistakes are mine and should be looked over.  Happy reading. Happy holidays.

The vast majority of people don't know what hunger feels like. When people say "I'm starving," they mean they skipped breakfast and have an appetite for steak and potatoes for dinner. They say "I'm famished," when they crave an ice cream sundae and get a stomach ache when they eat their fill of it. They think hunger is a feeling you get in your stomach, your throat and your mouth. They think hunger is just craving a taste and texture on your tongue, but they don't know what hunger truly is.

No.

Hunger is when the pangs you feel gnawing away in your gut, the ravenous want you experience when you smell something cooking, the way you can almost feel and taste food on your tongue, consumes your whole body. Your entire body screams for just the tiniest bit of nourishment that it hurts.

Ooh. It hurt so much.

Halle knew of this pain. Her bones recognized the familiar ache slowly grinding away at her insides; gnawing away at her ability to differentiate night and day. In a previous life, a very troubled distant past, the child sat with the aches for days at a time. That's why it was so hard to watch her little sister writhing on the floor as she clenched her stomach. "It hurts," Blue said softly, before peering back at the wooden locked door.

"I'm so so sorry Baba," she whimpered, leaning back weakly against the headboard of the tiny twin sized bed she wanted to forget all together.

How long has it been?

With trembling hands, Blue lifted a plastic cup Mike gave her some time ago to her lips, praying that there was still a drop of moisture left inside. Maybe it was the constant pain or her feeble mind, but she couldn't recall the last time she had tasted water or any decent nutrients beyond the stale granola bars Mike had slid underneath the door. Blue's once healthy form was no more. Her arms and legs felt like they were nothing but skin and minimal flesh beneath it to protect the bone, and her stomach felt like it had distended uncomfortably, as if begging to be filled.

Halle had been unwilling to eat the small amount of cereal bars Mike had for them, prioritizing her sister's needs before her own. In reality, she wanted to rip the fiber filled snack from the child's grip and stuff it to the back of her throat until the weird ringing sound left her ears. She was starving but her six year old sister should never know the pain of a constantly empty stomach or atrophying muscles. The teen sat up, wincing as she clutched her aching ribs. She very slowly, and very, very carefully swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Her legs were wobbly and weak from not having been used in such a long time, and she found that she had a hard time even just standing.

Halle looked around the room more attentively this time, out of her previous daze, and saw the red plastic cup sitting on the nightstand. With shaky limbs she lifted it. She pressed her dried, cracked lips to the rim of the cup and swore when nothing but warm air brushed over them. With fury, she threw the useless object to the floor, and her aching knees gave way too.

Ssll. Ouch!

Kneeling on a heap of strewn toys and playthings, her body too tired to even stand again, Halle kissed her baby sister's head. She couldn't believe that this would be how she left her. Crouching on the floor with nobody to care for her. No doubt Blue would eventually succumb to starvation too, a thought that made her heart ache and tears flow freely down her pale cheeks. The singer took in the dried tears that ghosted her baby sisters' chubby cheeks and neck. Blue had her eyes shut tight, seemingly wishing herself free of this bad terrible place.

"Mommyyy." She whispered as she rocked her small frame from side to side.

Be quiet Halle thought. Noises were bothering her today, they seemed to hurt her brain. She couldn't really describe how much certain little noises annoyed her. They caused an itch in her brain that she couldn't scratch and sometimes she felt a weird, impulsive urge to just run away from what was causing the noise.

"I want my mommyyyy!" Blue cried louder this time.

Halle couldn't run away from the noise. She was stuck and when she was restricted to one place unable to move, her bottled-up anger wanted desperately to come forth. But she couldn't take it out on Blue, at least not right now.

"Mommmmy-y-y" The six year old continued to be with her tears.

Halle's heart shattered at the amount of grief that shadowed her sisters' somber features.

Think like Chlo...
Chloe.
The teens breathing picked up in a mildly contained panic.
Chloeee.
Shit. What would Chloe do? What would Chloe do?
The thirteen year old swallowed every feeling of doubt, fear, and delay. A new presence of resolve made room on her otherwise defeated features.

"I'm-I'm gonna get us help." Halle whimpered. "I'm gonna get us help, okay Baba? It's okay." Even lifting her fingers to caress Blue's cheeks hurt, her weakened muscles screaming out in protest. She felt like a car running out of gas - ready to break down and be scrapped any moment.

"Promise?" Blue croaked.

"Promise." Halle nodded. She could only hope to make good on it.

Through the thin paneling of the walls, Blue and Halle could hear groaning...Deep and pain filled moans. Halle's hand tapped nervously against her thigh, getting more frantic as she started to hear more noise. She peered at her younger sister who lay grasping for her but still unable to move. The teen fought the urge to plug one ear and shake her head. Instead she put Blue out of her misery of needing to be close, crawling closer and pulling the child into her lap. The groaning from the other room turned into nasty sounds of someone retching and the boisterous voice of Mike complaining loudly about the mess. Though it triggered her fight or flight senses, the loud retching was music to the girl's ears.

Retching was a sign of life.

Purging: New beginnings.

Halle chuckled at that, dehydration, pain, hunger forming hysteria in her and forcing out a laugh, that turned into pitiful sobs. "Someone help! Please just help us!" She croaked, barely able to speak.

But no one came. If she remembered correctly, no one would ever come. Minutes seemed to turn into hours, hours were mistaken for days, days deluded for weeks. It seemed she would stay here until her death...and even longer after that. She just wanted her mom and dad. She wanted to feel how her own hot breath would bounce off of her mothers neck and back onto her face when she would hold her so tight to her chest to make anything bad go away. She wanted to feel the softness of blonde vanilla scented curls ghosting her face as she was rocked. She wanted to hear her dad's unmistakable laugh when her mama would yell at him for letting her sneak food into her bedroom or seeing his nod of approval when they laid down a track that he was fond of.

She wanted her life back and even though she knew she was being childish, she couldn't help it. She continued to sob, cry, and scream for help, curling into her sister who had joined her in her tirade as the sobs shook her ribs and shot a sharp pain through them. A somber duet that should've never been.

Eventually, their screams faded to sobs, faded to tears, and faded to silence. The groaning from the other room hadn't stopped, but it soothed Blue in a weird way. The heaviness of her mothers voice always brought her peace. If she just molded the lack of syllables into her mother's words, she almost felt at home in her bed, after a bad day at school. Briefly she wondered what Wyatt was doing at this moment. Probably picking his nose again, she decided. "Ugh."

All of a sudden, Halle stood up, placing her sister on her unsteady feet. The teen felt a whole lot better. Not just mentally, but physically, too. Bravado warped her reality, giving her the courage to take charge. She didn't even feel hungry anymore. Something tugged in her mind that that might be bad, but the teen didn't care. She felt 'better'.

Something caught her eye that matched her new, more optimistic, mood:

A slinky.

A small metal Slinky.

Blue watched as her sister eyed the strange looking toy. Halle tossed it from one hand to the other as if weighing her options. She pulled the metal coil, stretching the loops out as far as it would allow.

"What are you doing?" Blue croaked with her eyebrows cinched in anger. "What is that?"

Halle smiled brightly at the object in her hands as she held it like it was made of Gold. "It's a slinky...a piece of scrap metal old people used to play with before actual toys and the internet was invented. It's ancient."

Blue rolled her eyes and folded her arms. "Now is not the time for toys...stupid!"

"Mama said you can't call me THAT!" Halle screamed so loud her voice cracked at the last word.

"I don't care!" Blue let out a sob as she maintained her infamous scowl. Their hunger brought on the worst mood swings.

Ignoring the distasteful look on the younger girl's face and while wiping a few pesky tears, Halle slowly made her way towards the door. "And besides," she stared at the trinket in her hand like it was a life vest. "It's not just a toy. I'm gonna try to use this to unlock the door."

"But the man broke it dum—

"You see this?" Halle turned one end of the coil to her sister. "This is small enough to fit through the hole and it curves so it'll be easy to turn it and release the latch. It's not a deadbolt so that would make it easier. Imma go and get Chloe and sneak her back here. Then we can all just leave out the window. " she paced back and forth kicking toys out of her way as she seemed incapable of standing still.

Blue's eyes shifted in panic. "We can't...y-you sa-But you said the man would hear. The man is gonna hur-"

"I know what I said." Halle's eyes were bulging as she turned and bent so that she was eye level with the child, "But if we don't try we'll die here Baba. Okay? We'll die."

"Like Auntie Iris?" Blue was finally understanding the depth of their situation. "Mama said Auntie Iris died..." She backed away from the older girl shaking her head. "Then she-she went into the ground. Are we gonn-"

Halle grabbed her sisters shoulders and gave her one small shake like Chloe used to do when she spiraled. "No! We're gonna make it out. We-We can make a distraction or something and —"

"What's a distraction?"

"Like an interruption...ummm something that could get his attention so he's not focusing on what we're doing. He's focused on something else."

"What about mommy?" Blue glanced towards the wall where she'd heard her mother's cries many-a-times.

Halle swallowed deeply. Making sure she said the right things. "Umm She'll have to stay until we can get help."

"But it's mommy..."

———————————

And her gates shall lament and mourn, and she shall sit desolate on the ground. —Isaiah 3:26

"Why didn't you tell me you was about to be sick, baby? I would've helped you to the bathroom..." Mike asked as he dipped a mop into a red bucket filled with soapy water.

Bey answered with a loud groan and a firm clutch of her stomach. It had been aching for hours on end, and every once in a while it would give a twist, or a lurch and she felt as though she would be sick again. "I d-didn't know." She sighed and closed her eyes grimacing as her stomach gave an especially strong pitch.

"You need the bathroom?" Mike's voice broke into her nauseous cloud of vision.

"Yes," Bey rasped, eyes drifting over the man's stocky build. The pain in her stomach overwhelmed her, pulling and yanking her in and out of consciousness. She laid flat on her back, focusing on the gray ceiling. The springs in the mattress dug into her back, but the idea of moving and bringing more pain upon herself had her stomach rolling.

God Help Me

Mike let the mop go, allowing it to lean on a wall nearby before sitting on the bed. His first instinct was to try and soothe the woman but like before, she moved as far away from him as the chain on her ankle would allow.

The man's hand hovered over the rusted metallic restraints before he decidedly pulled away with a sigh. "How am I supposed to know you won't do anything stupid when I take your leg out?"

Bey slowly craned her neck around, wincing at the shooting pains through her torso."W-where am I g-gonna...w-w-where am I? Where will I-I go?" She closed her eyes, barely managing to keep down the single granola bar she had been offered.

"Having nowhere to go ain't stop you before." He grimaced after remembering the scene in the front room that caused him to restrain the woman in the first place.

"I-I already a-apologized for that." Bey clenched her mouth shut, ignoring her pale, clammy skin. She was sweating and the turns of her stomach were getting worse. "Mike..." She groaned. "I-I'm gon—gonna be sick."

The man nodded slowly, watching her for a while. "Okay...okay." He reached into his pocket for an oversized key ring. Bey looked on with saucers for eyes as the man took his time sorting through key after key. She did her best at stifling another gag.

Hearing the clink from the awful metal bracelet being unsecured nearly sent her flying for the nearest exit, but unfortunately her enervated legs, her worn body, and her clouded mind simply wouldn't allow any sudden movements.

"Come on baby," Mike said soothingly, helping her up. She held onto him tightly, afraid that she'd fall if she let go. "One step at a time..." He coached.

She listened, tilting her leg just enough to see if the pain she felt at her inner thighs was real or simply a figment of her imagination. Dried blood clung to her pale skin in red-brown patches, flaking off anytime she moved. Science and common sense told her it wasn't from her period. Plus there was too much of it for that.

They made fairly quick timing despite the woman nearly throwing up twice on the short trek to the adjoining bathroom. The man cringed as she began vomiting. He moved closer and gently put his hand on her back, rubbing it soothingly. He felt her back and shoulders tense as she heaved up barely nothing. After a few moments, her shoulders slumped and loosened as her body ran out of energy. She sat leaning on the toilet as she breathed slowly in and out, her limbs still weak and clammy.

Mike backed out of the way as she pulled herself up and limped to the sink bending over it to rinse her mouth of the acrid taste. When she finished, she remained leaning on the sink, inhaling and exhaling carefully. Finally she looked up into the mirror at her reflection, the flickering fluorescent lights so bright she was squinting. The gasp she let out just might have woken the birds. She brushed back her hair and studied one bruise in particular on her face, a large circle on her cheek, dark purple tint in color. Her injured hand was the same color but that didn't pique her interest in the slightest. Her eyes landed on the nightgown. Unbeknownst to her it had been changed. This gown had red lace along the top and around the bottom, and it fell well above her knees.

"It's the most modest one we have here." Mike claimed, witnessing her facial expression sour.

Her brain cut to her husband and the 'house on the prairie' jokes he'd bombard her with whenever she'd wear a nightgown back at home. Bey briefly wondered if Shawn hadn't left the house, would she be here right now counting bruise after bruise in some strange cabin.

The woman felt a tear go down her cheek as she thought those troubling thoughts, the flickering lights above her going double time. She wiped her face and said nothing as she stood frozen, like a framed picture that hung on the wall, realizing that even if she didn't have much left, she still had her pride. She found herself glaring into the mirror examining her tired features; the purple bruises underneath her eyes weren't exactly beautiful, the nasty gash on her forehead was no longer hidden beneath a half-assed attempt at a bandage, the left side of her chin was a repulsive reddish color, her lip was busted, and her hair needed a good washing. "C-can I t-t-take a bath?" She didn't think she could stand up long enough for a shower.

Mike stepped closer and began to caress her cheek. At his touch, Bey felt herself become overtaken by anger. He touched her so gently and looked at her with great curiosity and awe. The hand that touched her cheek began to play with her hair as his other one pulled her closer to him before he wrapped it around her waist. There was no space between their bodies now as her front was pressed up against his. All the while their eye contact never broke. "Only if I can join."

Somewhere inside of her, Bey had to talk herself out of strangling him because she knew it wouldn't end in her favor. Somewhere inside of her, Bey was told that it was okay to touch him. Her hands were placed on his chest at the time but quickly one began to make its way up to his face as she stroked the surface of his lips softly. With that same finger, she trailed over the man's shoulder. "Please? J-just ten minutes...I'm a-all dirty." Bey knew that it was wrong to entice a man who had done the things he had done but she didn't want to be chained to the bed again so soon and she really needed to be clean.

"Something's wrong with the water heater. It's not reaching here. The water is too cold." He said.

Her hand touched his face as he began to whisk her hair that covered one side of her neck behind her shoulder. He tilted his head in a very slow movement as he looked at her as if she was the most beautiful thing that he'd come across in a while. Before he leaned in he said, "but we can warm it up..."

Bey rolled her eyes at that.

Swiftly he clutched the back of her head as he grasped at her beautiful blonde hair in his palm while his other arm was still wrapped around her waist. "I'm just joking...damn loosen up." He kissed her neck.

She was becoming dizzier with each second that passed by. "Okay..." she called out. "Okay s-stop."

"Always teasing." He pouted when she pulled back feeling lonely.

She breathed hard as her chest heaved while she found his touch moving up from her stomach, over her breast and stopped at its destination, once again caressing her check. "I-I just want to be clean." She croaked with pleading eyes.

"I'm sorry. I just—I've waited so long for this," He whispered, pecking where he'd last touched.

Her eyes met his again as he stroked her face. "At l-least let me t-t-take a bath. Th-that's all I'm asking." She pushed at his chest but he didn't let that deter him.

"Anything for you...anything." He said as he leaned in to kiss her. Bey pulled her face away, but the man caught her by the chin.

"I-I just threw up a-and y-you wanna kiss me?" The woman asked.

"You're mine." The man gruffed out and shrugged.  "I'll have you in any way shape or form...don't really matter to me." His eyes watched her carefully as she found herself trapped once more under his hold.

"Kiss me," he commanded.

Bey kept talking to herself in her mind. She wasn't his. She was her own damn person! She wasn't going to be subjected to what he wanted.

"Mike." She was exasperated. Did he never grow tired of this game of cat and mouse?

"Aht what did I say?" He raised his brow in warning.

Tears filled her eyes as defeat emerged. She did as he said as she brought her hands up to his face and kissed him, leaning on her tippy toes. The kiss was gentle and sweet. The softness of his lips kissing her was much different than the hungry bites he gave her moments earlier.

Please
please...someone...anyone...someone...anyone...

Someone...anyone...please, please...I'm begging you...

Help me, help me, please!...Someone...someone help me!

Stop, please...stop now!

Stop it, stop it! Get your hands off me...

His lips moved gently against hers; no force or heavy pressure. Just sweet, soothing probing against her lips...her unresponsive lips. She let him kiss her, not because she was losing herself to him again but because she wanted to distract him, to keep him as calm as possible. Her mind was racing for an escape plan when Mike pulled away only to look deep into her eyes. "Tell me you want me." The crows feet around his eyes stretched as he attempted a smile.

She knew saying those words would be equivalent to giving him permission to do anything he felt was necessary. "I-I'm not doing th-that." Bey shook her head but regretted it immediately. The migraine that followed wasn't worth the strenuous shake.

Mike let her go and moved to turn on the faucet to the tub. "It's okay. You gonna say it before we leave this place. You'll be more comfortable with me  when we settle somewhere else. Somewhere less...rugged." He stood and touched her forehead, moving a strand that was in her eyes which flashed with hurt. What did he mean? She didn't like the way that sounded. She had hoped by now the man would realize what he was doing was wrong and let her children and her free. In that order. But it seemed he would never have plans of releasing them. Ever. He had plans of leaving town for good  and taking them with him.

"You j-just gone keep us forever? Agai—against our will?" Bey asked disbelievingly.

"Now you getting it." Mike nodded as he stared at the bathtub filling up. "That brain is starting to wake up I see." He looked very serious and that made her sick to her stomach.

"My mama...my f-family will look for us. They'll find us. What's n-not clicking?" The blonde said trying to convince him but it sounded more like she was trying to convince herself.

"If they ain't found y'all by now there ain't no use of wasting energy hoping and wishing. Nobody looking for you." He turned the knob to the faucet off when the water had taken up most of the space in the ratty old tub.

"Y-you kidding me? I'm s-supposed to be on t-tour right now... nobody's looking for m-me? Me? Beyoncé? The president w-w-will probably send his t-troops. E-Everyone's looking for me. I-I-I can't just go missing and n-nobody looks for me. Y-you ain't take some r-regular woman a-and her kids. You took m-me! Beyoncé! And a-all three Carter girls!"

"Ain't no Carter girls!" Came his growling reply. "Nobody's coming to save you!"  He breathed heavily as he encroached in her space. "No knight in shining armor is pulling up to rescue the Queen." He used air quotes. "You and the two little princesses and that annoying ass lady in waiting are here to stay." He added with a hearty chuckle leaving the woman stunned. "I'll be back with some extra clothes. Soap and towels should be underneath the cabinet." He announced but before he could make his exit, Bey stopped him with a burning question that was weighing heavy on her chest.

"W-Why do you w-want me? Y-you don't even kn-know me," she asked forwardly.

Mike was at a loss for words. All the while he continued to look gently into her hazel eyes. "I knew you once," he whispered, which didn't make any sense to Bey. Even in her teens when they went to the same school he didn't know her. He knew of her and she was nothing like that mouse of a child now. He didn't know her. He didn't know her at all.

"And ever since then I didn't need to guess how love felt...because I had already found it." In this moment he resembled an honest man; shoulders broad, neck jutted, and clear eyes.

Bey wondered for a second what it would be like to just accept things for the way they were. If she just let Mike have his way, let him delve deeper into his delusions, maybe she wouldn't be scared anymore. Would it be for the best just to go with the flow and pretend to be his? Bey decided it wouldn't because in her heart she didn't want to die. She'd seen enough clichéd movies where the crazed man stalked a woman he was obsessed with and ended up killing her then himself so they could be together forever.

Forever was an awfully long time and Beyoncé knew she didn't want that. She wanted to live. She wanted her kids to grow up and fall in love and have kids of their own. She wanted to have choices again. She wanted her life back, and if she surrendered herself to him, she could kiss her life goodbye because he would take it from her. No matter how much she pleaded. No matter how hard she prayed for mercy, this monster ultimately had the last say.

A few times she'd hear his voice inside her mind talking to her. Reminding her that there was no way out and that all of this was her fault. She wanted so desperately to make it stop. But there was no way to make him stop. He was determined to have her. He was determined to claim her children and her mind. Just as that thought snaked around, she heard Blue and Halle calling out for help. A chill, sinister feeling crept over her, but she kept her gaze fixed steadily in the same direction. She stared at Mike as he stared back. When she opened her mouth to retort she was still utterly unprepared as to what it was she could even say. She didn't know how to communicate effectively with someone so far gone. So Bey was stuck in a strange emotional limbo – looking for a moment too long at the man like a pathetic imbecile who couldn't form words.

"You never knew me," she grumbled, finally.

Mike let out a brazen huff and finally made his exit. In less than a minute he returned just as promised, holding clothing that was folded neatly in his hands. "Be careful with this sweater, it was my grandmother's." He placed the items down on the back of the toilet.

"Thank you." It rushed out of her mouth before he changed his mind, because she deserved this much, at least, and he was not used to pointless niceties.

There was not a single shift in Mike's features, but he stayed quiet and his eyes held hers like it was a silent challenge to reveal some ulterior motive.

"You didn't have to g-give me anything so...thank you."

Instead of loosening up, his gaze narrowed, full of suspicion and pride. "I did it for me. So you'd be clean and comfortable for our alone time later on." He cupped her face, running his thumb up and down her cheek.

I'm gonna kill him, Bey thought as angry tears streamed from her eyes and fell like exotic waterfalls down both of her cheeks. Mike wiped them away as he kissed her on her left cheek. The touch of him made her sob harder.

I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna kill him! Each tear was an ungodly pledge to being this man's personal grave digger.

"Don't cry, baby. I keep telling you I'm doing this because I love you. I'm doing this for us."

"But I-I don't love you," she argued.

Mike became instantly irked by her reply. Both of his hands gently grasped her shoulders and he searched her eyes, as if he were trying to determine if she'd just lied to him. "You do. You just don't know it yet," he sighed as he nuzzled against her ear.

Bey lost all will to bite her tongue any more. In an instant she shoved him and hit him. Mike didn't try to defend himself at all since her blows did no harm to him. But her first swing really took him off guard. The blonde was screaming bloody murder as she continued to hit his chest. "I hate you! I hate you!" She repeated over and over again. "I HATE YOU!"

Mike let out a lightheartedly mocking snort and replied in a lofty tone,"You don't mean that. It's the head injury talking."

At these simple words, a violent flash of the many hours she spent alone in this God forsaken room with this crazed man bombarded her mind. She cried out and fell to her knees, clutching almost painfully tight at her temples while Mike held her in his arms. "Shhhhhh." He cooed.

She didn't want him to comfort her, she wanted him to release her. "Why a-are you doing this to m-me?" The annoyance she felt carried through the question. "Tell me."

He didn't have an answer for her because he knew that she wouldn't understand. After a while of sobbing she pulled away from him and rose to her feet. She forced as much hatred she could produce into her eyes as she spat at him. "At least g-go out and get my kids s-some FOOD! You sitting here listening to th-them cry cause th-they hungry! What kind of person does that t-t-to children?"

Mike smacked his lips, standing as well. "Chloe is n—

"They KIDS!" Bey screamed, finding fuel from the darkest pits of her soul. "ALL THREE OF'EM! I don't care h-how you try to rationalize in that s-sick head of yours! Chloe is a damn Child! Can't even take a field trip to the zoo with–without m-my signature!"

"She a kid but she ain't a kid kid," he scratched his head.

"Even y-you starting to h-hear how crazy you sound! What the hell is a kid kid? She's —

"Around the same age you was when we—

"Don't you D-DARE say what I think you about t-to say!" Bey cut him off. "Because e-even then you were only a couple years older than I was. You are a grown ass man now and your pr-preferences still ain't changed?"

Mike approached her with playfulness locked in his eyes. "They kinda changed..." His smirk grew deeper, making Bey even madder.

A beat of silence passed.

"You sick bitch!" She cried. "I d-don't wanna talk about this n-no more."

"You the one who brought it up. Now you don't wanna talk about it?" Mike asked.

"Ain't that w-what I said?" The woman bit out angrily.

The man grabbed her by the waist with strength and forced her to look at him. At one point Bey tried to push him away but he latched on to her tightly and began to plant hot and intense kisses down her neck, to her chest and ended at the top of her breast.

"Stop," she panted.

"Make me." He jumped at her.

Bey flinched, exhaling deeply. "Please, w-why are you d-doing this to me? Why won't you tell me? Just t-tell me!" She begged, tears taking up most of her face.

He hugged her, rubbing her back to calm her down.
"Did you ever think to yourself, that maybe you wanted this? That maybe I'm just here to finish what you started?" He backed out and left the door cracked a few inches. Which surprised her. In her mind she just knew the man would sit in while she bathed and whisper sick nothings to her the entire time.

The cries from her youngest children had died by now, but deep down Bey wanted their tirade to go on for hours if only to hear their sweet voices again. Almost immediately she cursed herself for the selfish thought.

I'm not gonna leave you

I'm not gonna leave you

Mama's not gonna—

"Shit!" The woman groaned as she bent down to search the contents of the cabinet. It was like she was on autopilot the way her fingers grabbed the bathing necessities. She stood up, accidentally catching another glimpse of herself in the mirror. Ugh. She thought. She could hardly even recognize herself and now understood why Blue told her she looked scary.

Unable to look at herself any longer, she stripped off her gown, moved the new clothes from the toilet to the sink, and stuffed her dirty nightgown in the corner before she braved it and climbed into the bath.

Cold was not an accurate description for the water she sat down in, as fast as she could before she chickened out. Freezing wasn't even a good enough word. She hadn't any good enough words for the temperature of the bath because her brain and flesh practically went numb the minute she got in. Her teeth began to chatter immediately and soon the numbness gave way to an intense burning, so cold it was like she had doused herself in bleach. Trying to be quick, despite the new heaviness in her limbs, she scrubbed her flesh, starting at her toes and working up to her hips.

That alone took several minutes, each pass of the towel and squirt of soap washing away crusted blood and dirt, revealing her actual skin. Another large bout of time was spent on her upper body, working from her hips up to her stomach, ignoring the scars that Mike left. Trailing up and down her back as much as she could reach, her chest and thighs. The instant those damp fibers touched the inside of her right thigh, she hissed in pain. Taking her time, she dabbed at the wounds a little more tenderly, watching as deep lacerations and imprints of sharp nails were uncovered. Then she moved on to her neck, her face, her ears, scrubbing until it hurt as much as the water did. A couple times she split open her wounds again, tearing into the grooves and lines that the man left behind with the blunt edges of her fingernails, until she screamed in cold anguish. It was all she could do to not feel like a ghost. Now as she washed her marked up body, her soapy hands absentmindedly scrubbing up and down her scars, protruding and swollen, she did not think of how Mike mutilated her. She did not dwell on the knowledge that he had destroyed her body, that she will forever have to hide herself and her skin, that her husband will never be able to look upon her nakedness again without horror and disgust. She did not think of these things, because her mind was fixated on a single, happy memory. Seeing her family again, leaping into her mother's arms. Kelly's obnoxious laugh, her husband's gentle touch. Solange's stupid smirk played on a blissed out loop in her psyche as she rang the towel out for the last time. Blood tinted it a very faint and subtle pink as she leaned back against the white cast iron tub. With a deep breath, she lowered herself under the surface, enjoying the weightless floating feeling.

Was this what it felt like to be dead? Was there any feeling for the dead at all or were they just simply lifeless? She wasn't entirely sure she wanted to know those answers. Popping back up to breathe, she felt her sense of peace shatter as the sound of Blue's whining broke her serenity. With a frown and a sigh of resignation, the woman folded the washcloth neatly, placing it on the edge of the tub.

When she was done, she shook with the cold, her flesh stinging. It was worth it though when she raised her hand and it was her skin, not blood or dirt. Her pale skin, clean nail beds and wrinkled, pruned fingertips. It was all her, and the bath she was sitting in was a color she couldn't possibly describe, the monster she washed off. Red, black, brown and crusting at the edges of the bath already.

The thought of laying down in it turned her stomach so she got out, the water running off her splattering red on the bathroom floor. There was another towel under the sink and it was stiff but warm and she shivered uncontrollably as she bent over the tub to wash her hair. Even more time was spent on her hair, washing it through, wringing it out and then wrapping it in yet another stiff towel. By the time she sat down to dry herself off, her skin was covered in goosebumps and her pruney fingers were the same color as the bath water.

She pulled on her new clothes, including the sweater that smelled oddly of mothballs, as her teeth chattered so badly they sank continuously into her bottom lip, her flesh numb beneath the fabrics as they covered her up. There was a second where she debated getting back in the tub if only for a second longer by herself but the bath water was nowhere near clean and she wasn't sure she could brave the cold again, so she sat on the toilet contemplating life.

"What am I gonna do?" She whispered to herself. It wasn't until now that the severity of her situation truly settled in. Nestled comfortably next to her like a luscious looming death. A passing of four vital lives weighing wearily on her mournful body full of shame. The blonde grabbed the tattered nightgown from the floor, squeezing it until it was but a ball of fabric scrunched in her palms. She pressed the gown tightly over her mouth until she was sure no one could hear any sound that she might've made. "Ahhhhh!" She screamed, clenching her eyes shut. She sat up, placing the fabric in her lap. "What am I-I gonna do?" Her feet arched then flexed as her thumb scratched tirelessly at her middle finger. "What am I g-gonna do?" Her body, though stoic, rocked desperately back and forth. "God..." she closed her eyes, her head hung humbly. "Oshosi, Elegba," Her hands were clasped tightly while she continued her incessant rocking. "Yemeyá, Oshún...p-please, what am I gonna do? Y-you gotta help me out h-here."

The front of her damp hair fell from the towel it was wrapped in, dripping one two three onto her face, mixing with her salty tears. "You see I'm–I'm struggling. You see I c-can't do it..." Her voice cracked but she continued. "I can't do it by myself so p-please help me...please," she rasped. "I'm not asking for m-me...I'm asking f-for my children. Please help them. Please please? They d-don't deserve this. Baba just turned six...like just. My baby sh-shouldn't have to be here. LilBit e-even though she swear she so b-big and bad, deep down she's j-just a sweet little girl who—who needs her mother." The woman took a breath.  "A-and Chloe she—she just s-started calling me mama. Can you believe th-that?" Bey chuckled lowly to herself. "Mama," she smiled despite the sore on her lip stinging. "My babies n-need me," she got angry again. "They need m-me. God I know y-you w-wouldn't bring all of us together j-just to tear us apart l-like this, so what's the plan? Wh-what am I gonna do?" She sat in utter silence, her heart jumping at every creak and groan the cabin gave as she clutched the fabric of the nightgown tighter to her chest. "What am I gonna d-do?" She sniffed, glancing at the remaining filth inside of the tub, her shoulders dropping in dejection soon after.

"You good in there?" Mike yelled.

Bey kept her face blank and maintained a steady voice as she politely responded, "yes th-thank you."

The man gruffed and let out a hum of acknowledgment before reversing from the door and headed off to wander somewhere in the cabin.

———————————

"It's not gonna work. It's never gonna work." Blue stood behind her sister watching as she ineptly fiddled with the broken door handle.

"Shhhh!" Halle spat, sticking her tongue to the side of her mouth to ensure her undeterred concentration.

The six year old folded her arms across her chest and made a show of rolling her eyes. "Do you even know what you're doing?"  She lazily kicked at a stuffed animal.

"Blue it's already hard as is trying to focus...keep my head clear. I don't need your commentary." Halle whispered.

"But why is it taking so looong?" Blue whined, stomping her foot indignantly. "I'm hungr—

"Agh!" Halle yanked her hand away from the sharp metal that nicked her finger and bit her lip to keep from crying out at the numbing pain. She carefully took a few silent steps back, instinctively avoiding the creaky floorboard just in front of the closed door. "See that's why you need to be quiet! Dang! Mommy told you about distracting me when I'm doing something important!You know it doesn't help!"

"It's not my fault you have that disease." Blue shrugged.

Halle's face fell, but before she could utter a retort, a looming shadow appeared underneath the door. Her gaze traveled down to the doorknob as it began to turn. "Move back," she pushed her younger sister behind her. Fear, none-the-less, threatened to take over but she refused to let it show. She couldn't. Not with the strong grip Blue had around her waist. "He's coming in." The six year old whispered.

"Remember Baba, just don't talk to him okay?" Halle pulled her sister's arms away and escorted her to the bed, sitting her down. "Don't look him in the eye." She held the girl by her shoulders. "He might take it the wrong way. Like you're challenging him."

Blue nodded with a confused look on her face. She glanced from the twisting knob back to her sister's fiery wide eyes. "Look at the floor?" She asked. Voice shaking.

"Anywhere but at him." Halle stiffened, hearing the squeak from the rusted door clicking open. "Just please please be quiet so he can leave fast. We're still sticking to the plan okay?"

"Okay." Blue swallowed heavily. She had assumed as much. "Okay." She whispered to herself. "Okay." She nodded once though she knew it was mostly to herself than to affirm any kind of plan of action.

The girl seemed to understand, which was a relief. Halle's eyebrows scrunched together as she turned her head towards the door but allowed her eyes to roam over the pink room some more, keeping her hands busy as if having trouble tying the string to her joggers. Blue's frown deepened and her head lowered as the door finally creaked open. The child pushed herself toward the headboard and made herself into a tiny ball. Halle on the other hand stood ten toes down as she grimaced in Mike's direction. She gritted her teeth when she saw that signature grin take over his features.

"Hey baby girl. Hey Baby Bey." He waved casually.

He's such a fucking bum ugh, Halle thought with frustrated bitterness. "Hey," she forced a sad smile, still picking at the strings of her pants.

Seeing him again was like a sledgehammer to her heart, it ached upon seeing the man she regarded as the devil.

"Hey," Mike said again, directing his attention towards a silent Blue.

"Hi..." she whispered but wasn't able to suppress the shiver that tried to make its way up her spine.

The man stopped at the entrance when he spotted Halle's disgusted glare trained on him. "You got something to say?"

She twitched her hand longing to fidget, trying to make the discomfort go away. No sound left the teen's mouth but that sickening glare refused to waver even for a second. Mike raised both his hands and closed the door softly behind him with his foot. It clicked shut and he took a step forward. Halle took a step back.

"I just came to check on y'all. Your mama was worried about all the crying and carrying on." He said taking another step. "Baby Bey you okay?" Blue flinched at the nickname while he continued to take slow steps towards them one at a time.

Don't look at him. Blue repeated in her mind.
The child's knees were pressed so hard into her chest she thought it would stop her from breathing.

Don't look at him. Look down. Look down.

Mike scratched at the hair on his chin, taking in the way the small girl purposely turned away from him. "Why you not answering me Baby Bey? What's wrong?"

Still, Blue was silent.

Halle's hands were twitching but her eyes remained trained on the man in front of her. "She's fine."

"Are you?" He questioned, pausing in his stride and shifted his hands from in front of him to be clasped behind his back. He regarded the way Blue refused to look his way. He and Halle were at an impasse for a few seconds before the man grinned confidently. "You okay baby?" He walked past Halle heading towards the bed.

The teen followed, tripping over the toy slinky in the process. "I-I said she's FINE!" She stood between the bed and the man, attempting to block his view of the six year old. "There's nothing wrong with her. She's just hungry. That's why she was crying. You can leave now."

"Oh I can leave now?" Mike chuckled lightly, staring daggers.

Halle's shoulders clenched and she felt the urge to sprint away. She tried to stop her breaths from becoming short and shallow but she couldn't focus on anything besides her hatred for the man in front of her.

"You wanna apologize or you gonna just stand there acting like you gone do something?" He sounded angry yet nice at the same time.

Rolling her eyes only gave her a momentary reprieve from her nervousness. She tapped her foot, breathing in the cramped muggy air.

"You deaf?" He taunted her with a quick shove of her shoulders causing her to stumble backwards.

"Huh?" He pushed her again.

"I..." The thirteen year old did nothing but fidget with the strings of her pants. She felt herself getting angry and barely noticed when her foot began to tap incessantly again. "I'm..."

"You, what?" Mike shoved at her shoulder once more. "Hm?" Another shove brought wrathful tears to Halle's eyes.

Mike couldn't care less. "Do you hear me?" He asked with another shove.

Blue's stomach dropped after witnessing the man push her sister around. Her chest tightened and suddenly she really wanted to say something. But Halle said don't talk to him, she thought.

The girl went back and forth with herself, weighing the pros and cons as best as her feeble mind could. However, she felt slightly nauseous, and her lungs physically hurt from keeping her thoughts to herself. The six year old tried to take some deep breaths, but she couldn't, there was too much pressure on her chest so much she thought she would explode. "She has HDHD!" Blue screamed as loud as she could. "And my mommy said give her some time to answer one question before you ask another one!"

Mike folded his arms and took a long look at Halle, scrutinizing every feature of her fuming face. "Is that what they putting in your head?"

Halle couldn't help spiraling down into a deep well of self pity and sadness. It had been awhile since she felt this way. Her life for the past year had been filled with people who loved her and only built her up; not rip and tear at her insecurities like this man did. She dipped her head, her face gaining a confused frown and instead of answering his question, she asked one herself. "Why are you like this?" The way she looked at him, and the tone of her voice, it was almost pitying, a sort of awkward pity.

"God made me like this." He replied, not being able to completely hide the traces of bitterness in his tone.

"Well God has some explaining to do." Halle let out a frustrated huff, wiping her face free of tears.

The man bent lower so that he was eye level with the teen. "Is that any way to talk to daddy?" He pushed her hair to one side of her face. "You are not like those uppity rich kids your mama had you hanging with back at her house." His voice was smooth, calm. "You are nothing—"

"You're not her dad!" Blue interrupted harshly, not caring about the flash in Mike's eyes at that. "You're not any of our dad! You're a weird man! Stop saying that! Our dad is at home! At our real house! The nice one!" Blue yelled, her eyes flashing with rage and fear.

Mike surged forward but before he got a chance to lift a finger, Halle was there in front of him, pushing him backwards. She doubled down and struck the man with equal if not greater fury in his stomach. "Get away from her!"

She felt her wrist being yanked and her body being brought so close to the man their breath mingled. Mike stared into Halle's furious eyes while trying to ignore the fast paced beating of his heart.

"Let me go." The words came out fast but calmly from the thirteen year olds clenched jaw.

"Not if you gonna continue to act like a little spoiled brat who has no home training." Mike countered fiercely, glaring at the teen.

"Am I?" She whispered softly, not breaking his glare this time. "Or did you come in here starting stuff? If I'm acting like a spoiled brat because I don't want you to touch my six year old sister then so be it." Her face grew an angry shade of red and her aura reflected her irritation, blazing like a fire.

Mike jerked as if slapped, staring at her with wide eyes that instantly lost their anger and filled with regret instead. Halle turned away from the sight, not wanting to see it. How dare he fix her with eyes so caring, it's what kept her on his leash for so long. He was amazing at mimicking actual human emotions. "I...I don't—please don't treat her like you treated me. Please? Please?" She shifted away and Mike allowed her to, his hands falling limply to his sides. They stood in silence for a while but it was broken by the man.

"If there was any action I could take back..." he stated but trailed off. Halle wasn't facing him but she could hear the tremor in his voice. Blue stared at the pink comforter, pretending to be interested in its patterns but Halle caught the subtle glances her way.

"It would be how I treated you." Mike finished his sentence.

Halle shook her head, refusing to turn around. "It's too late for that now. The only thing you could do to make up for it is to let us go." She informed him, turning her head to see that Mike was watching her. "Let us go before my mom gets worse." She pleaded. "If anything happens to her. If she..." Halle shook the morbid thoughts away before swallowing deeply and continuing "Her death will haunt your conscience...forever..."

The man studied the fierceness radiating off of the once susceptible little girl standing before him. Something was different. Her body seemed to shake with pure determination. "If I let you go I'll be alone." He said soft enough Halle wasn't sure she was supposed to hear it at all.

She stared.

With tears filling her eyes all she did was stare.

"That's why you brought us here?" She shifted her weight from one foot to the other. "So you wouldn't be alone?" The thirteen year old asked, though it sounded more like a statement. A sad acknowledging one.

"Maybe." Mike replied simply, eyes sadly traveling to Blue then back to Halle.

It was hard being here, being so close yet feeling like they were standing on opposite points of the world. They might as well have been for how crushed, how defeated Halle was feeling being in Mike's presence. She watched the man go through his thoughts and once again goosebumps appeared on her skin.

No.

"You don't have to do this." The girl approached him. "You don't have to keep us here." Tears were welling in her eyes again as she cupped his cheek with one hand. Her thumb slowly stroked his cheekbone. "You can be a good man if you try. I've seen it."

Mike opened his mouth to protest but was stopped when Blue's stomach called out with a fierce growl. The man let out a deep breath through his nose and pressed his forehead to Halle's, closing his eyes and taking in her familiar scent. "I'll try for you...for all of you." He whispered, glancing towards the cowering six year old. "I'm gonna be good this time...I can be the father you deserved." He stood to his full height.

"I'm gonna run to the store...get you girls some snacks. How does that sound?" He reached over, giving Blue's leg a light squeeze which she flinched away from. She didn't want to end up like her mommy all bruised and scary looking. "What type of candy do you like?"

Blue's eyes lit up at the prospect of something to eat...especially candy. "Candy?"

Halle suddenly felt cold. "Uh-um she's not allowed to eat any candy," she lied quickly trying to intervene. "Maybe pick her up some regular food? No...no candy." She said firmly, trying to ignore the spikes jabbing into her heart at her own words.

Anything but candy.

"Your mama won't let you eat candy?" He leaned in, looking down at the child in question. Blue's head snapped in the direction of her sister confused on why they were telling a tale about something so simple. The two sisters shared an intense moment where they let their eyes hold a conversation their mouths weren't allowed to. Blue could see the veins in Halle's neck twitch and the six year old got the hint.

No candy.

The room was quiet. The silent reply from the youngest drew out a heavy sigh from the man as he pulled away from her. "She lets y'all disrespect adults all day but draws the line at a piece of candy?" He muttered to himself. "How about this?" Mike smiled at Blue. Halle's fists twitched at her sides. He had a serpent's smile. It lacked so much authenticity that the ophidian-like grin caused her to take a small step forward.

"You can come with me to the store and pick out anything you want." Mike's giant frame towered over the child who's eyes never strayed away from her big sister's.

Halle's tough, she'll protect me. Mommy said my sisters would always take care of me, Blue thought. But from the obvious size difference the little girl wasn't so sure. Plus she got beat up really bad by the bigger girl at school and had to leave forever. Maybe she's not so tough, Blue let her mind wander as she glanced up and met Mike's eyes fully for the first time since he stepped into the room. "That sounds good?" He asked. "Hm? You wanna come with daddy Mike to get you some candy? Get something in that little tummy of yours? We don't have to let your mama know you ate it...it can be our little secret."

An uneasy silence fell between them.

Blue looked from her sister down to her growling stomach and back to the man then hesitantly nodded. Halle couldn't help the stinging she started to feel in her eyes. She took a couple of hurried  steps towards the bed, crawling on it and throwing herself next to her sister. "She's not going anywhere with you!" She said with a final tone. "Do you hear me?"

"HUH?!!" Halle's mouth was opened wide and her brows were cinched together; incensed.

It looked like Mike had opened his mouth to say something but Halle squeezed her sister tight to her chest "NOWHERE!" She screamed before his words were heard. She couldn't figure out where this confidence stemmed from but she was grateful for it. "You stay away from her! She doesn't want anything from you! Get out!" She couldn't calm herself down.

Mike sat awkward and stiff, on the very edge of the bed for a while before Halle began screaming again. "Don't be like that babygirl." He slung his arm around her waist tugging the teen closer.

"Get ouuuuut!" She cried, kicking her leg out so the man couldn't come any closer to her or her sister. "She doesn't want any candy, get the hell OUT!" Her tears stung violently. She knew she was in the middle of a panic attack when she couldn't catch her breath properly and her tears refused to seize. "Leave us alone! Leave us ALOOONE!" She cradled Blue closer to her chest and rocked back and forth. "Leaveusaloneleaveusalone!"

He wearily scrubbed his hand over his beard.

"Leave us alone! Leave us alone!" Blue repeated after her sister with a tremor in her own voice. The child squeezed her eyes shut praying he'd listen and leave.

The waves of conflicting emotions raged harshly across Mike's face. The murderous instincts within him began to take over for a moment before he made the decision to exit the room to save face. He didn't want to do anything else he'd soon regret...not in front of baby Bey. He didn't want to scare his little girl. Both Halle and Blue watched the man leave the room without another word, waiting until they saw the last of his shadow disappear around the corner. No more words were exchanged, and time dripped lazily past.

————————————

Bey stood from the toilet and frantically trailed her fingers over nearly everything, lingering on the doorknob. If he planned on moving them to a different location she wanted the police to at least have an inkling that she was here.

Just as she appeared to move the knob, she stopped short and turned slowly to the sink. Her breath hitched and her heart beat so fast her lungs couldn't get in sync with a drum so sporadic. She could hear faint crying in the distance and her heart dropped as the familiarity of the cries came into mind.

No

The jarring cries almost brought her to her knees, and immediately she clapped her hands over her ears.

"No," she shook her head before whispering the word again. But the blaring sound resounded once more, louder this time. 

Ringing in the truth.

Drowning out the lies.

Oh those crippling cries!

Ohhh, that song, she knew.

A life of goodbyes, the pitiful cries of an infant whose beautiful wails eerily reminded her of Blue.

Sure, most babies sounded the same, but Blue's cries always brought an ache to the blonde's heart. They always made her feel guilty for not feeding her faster, or picking her up right away when she woke in the morning. And this cry was no different. In fact, it was worse, the bawling and blubbering was downright grueling to the ears.

"I-I'm tweaking." She voiced as she slowly reached for the faucet and turned it on with the intent to splash her face.

Again the eerie, harrowing wail of an infant reached her ears and yet she shivered as if a knife had pierced her mournful heart.

She was stuck.

Feet cemented to the filthy floor, watching as the water in the sink began to turn murky; almost black as coal. Bey seemed enraptured by the dreary stream of water, narrowing her eyes as if it required constant monitoring. She was so still that by the time she came to the realization that the water in the sink was overflowing, it had already covered the entire bathroom floor and was now oozing its way underneath the door.

"Shit!" Bey exclaimed, quickly turning the knobs to the faucet off.

However, she twisted the rusted silver a little too hard and ended up holding the broken valve in her hand.

"I didn't do it! I-it–it was an accident!" Looking over her shoulder in complete panic, Bey tried her best at screwing the piece back on but her sloppy efforts were in vain.

"Shit! Shit shit SHIT!" She drummed her fingers against her thighs and for a moment looked so utterly disgusted with herself that the only thing she could do was splash water in her face over and over again.

"Ugh!" She groaned, wiping the water away with the back of her shaking hands.

"Get it t-together get it together Bey c-come on!"

Dirty water rushed relentlessly from the nozzle, splashing her hard in the face and drowning out the baby's shrills but for a moment. The cold didn't bother her but out of instinct she stepped back, taking a minute to inhale deeply. "Wheeew," she exhaled heavily and ran a hand roughly through her hair, only making it a few inches before it became stuck in her tangles. Taking another deep breath, she tried her hardest to slow her thumping heart, but all she could hear were the sniffles and cries now, encompassing everything she knew.

Desperate to get out of earshot before the pain in her chest could overwhelm her, she trotted towards the door but stopped short realizing she didn't want to leave the confinement of this bathroom. No, not right now. Not this soon. It was the only place where Mike allowed her to be alone.

Like a passing breath, or a troublesome, buzzing mosquito that Bey wanted to swat and kill, the incessant crying rang louder. Covering her ears, she headed in the direction of the toilet, slamming her knees into the cheap linoleum floors. The continuous wailing from the baby had caused her stomach to turn sour. Her head hovered over the opening prepared to spill out her shame when slight movement caught her eye.

Her lips twitched.

It could have been a hungry mouse or a settling skeleton in the cupboards, either way, the blanket of perspiration on the woman's face went cold as ice. A sharp gasp left her lips as she heard a creak from behind her and she whipped around, her hazel eyes wide as she examined the bathroom. She couldn't see anybody, but that didn't mean that something wasn't there. She had learned long ago that she couldn't see everything she feared.

Her hands gripped the roots of her hair, pulling painfully until she was satisfied. "Be quiet!" She whispered harshly, pulling harder. It hurt but in a strange way felt nice. Just as she believed she was adjusting to the constant presence of shrills, the cries piqued, and so did Beyoncés voice, spewing out expletives as she begged the noise to "just quiet down."

But the cries refused to give the woman's ears a break. It went into one ear blaring BlArInG BLARING! Then into the other, piercing like a hunting siren calling unto ears already rejecting its very existence. Bey frowned at its insolence. "SHUT UP SHUT UP!" She felt like she'd scream her throat raw if she went on this way. The woman sat on the floor on the cusps of absoluteness, trying her damndest not to trip or stumble down the slippery slope of hysteria. However the grips of delusion had its talons sunken deep into her. Cradling her like live prey waiting to be ripped apart. "Be quiet, baby," she groaned, rubbing tirelessly at her stomach. Her head lolled to the side in exhaustion. "Leave me a-alone." She begged. "Please..."

There was silence.

Complete silence.

It was ironic, or perhaps a cosmic turnabout when she heard nothing.

It was – sickening, that silence. Sickening and sweet. Oh so sweet.

The stillness stretched on for a few minutes leaving the woman with an acutely uncomfortable feeling. Inch by inch, Bey raised her head from the toilet and laid flat on the floor, thankful for its coolness. Everything seemed to be vacillating between slow motion and time passing far too quickly. The only thing she could truly register was the pain in her stomach, the feeling that something was wrong. "Agh!" she gripped her belly.

The cry was back, going through great lengths to echo her agony back to her denying ears. The blonde tried to push herself up but the moment she went to use her muscles, her body seemed to collapse on itself and she was crashing back onto the hard surface she'd been laid across. Bey wanted to lay there forever. Her body was tired, her mind felt fuzzy, and her eyes could barely stay open. Cold hands pressed against the side of her face and, instead of cringing at cold, she embraced it.

"Mommy?" A familiar high-pitched voice came. It carried with it a chill that ran down Bey's spine and caused goosebumps to break out on her arms and legs.

She turned slowly towards that voice, her breath catching as her gaze locked on a nearly three feet tall figure standing mere inches away from her. The outline of the silhouette was just as familiar as the voice and for a moment, Beyoncé thought that her mind and eyes were playing tricks on her. As if the figure sensed her doubt, it moved a few inches, stepping backwards but moving forward to hide their identity. Clearly female, she wore pink floral print pants that reached the floor, tattered and muddy. A matching pink shirt that tied behind her neck and was semi-backless. Her hair was dark, a matted mane of locs that reached just past her ears.

Beyoncé sat there, dumbfounded. Standing above her, swinging a jump rope back and forth casually was "Sweetpea?" Bey blinked several times and shook her head faintly, but the child remained facing away from her. "Sweetpea...Chloe?" She called out.

"Fudge fudge, call the judge. Mama's having a newborn baby." The child sang slowly, moving backwards but towards her with predatory grace. Each movement almost seemed practiced and yet held an unpredictability that made it hard to guess what she may do next.

"Baby why w-won't you look at me?" Bey asked softly, giving herself points for keeping her voice calm and collected. There was no fear of the child, but a strange sense of longing that pulled at her. It caused the blonde to shift slightly, turning so that she could sneak a peek at the girl's face.

Without warning, the little girl whipped her head in the opposite direction. "I'm not lying. It won't stop crying." The child stated simply, her voice sounding almost husky as she continued to swing the jump rope back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Beyoncé got lost in the steady movements. Intrigued by the small child who refused to face her.

The looming presence would have intimidated or perhaps terrified anyone that encountered it but to Beyoncé, it felt safe. Daringly, the woman reached out and allowed the tips of her fingers to touch the child's left shoulder. The small girl seemed frozen to her spot, unable to move anything other than the silly swinging rope in her right hand. She remained stark still as Bey began to turn her slowly.

Heart pounding, Bey clamped her hands over her mouth deep in disbelief. Before she could say anything, or even formulate a sentence, the girl, with the pace of a snail, looked up, revealing beautiful upturned eyes and a cute button nose that was way too familiar. The woman tried to speak but quickly realized that her windpipe had been genuinely constricted by the shock. In front of her big teary brown eyes stared straight, and those thick dark locs were completely unmistakable. As was the little widows peak of hair directly in the middle of that sizable forehead.

It was Chloe.

That she knew already. A mother always knows, but she looked so young, probably four years old.

"Chloe." The woman whispered, studying the child's face closely, looking for any reaction to the name, and found none. Instead the girl narrowed her eyes and seemed to size the woman up, trailing her eyes from Bey's bare feet to the festering wound upon her head.

"Sweetpea?" Bey asked this time.

"Hi mommy," the child before her responded easily, her voice impassive, apparently unaffected by Bey's recognition.

The immense anger Bey had seen on her little girl's face gave way to absolute sorrow. The woman hurried towards young Chloe scooping her from the floor and adjusting her to her lap. The action felt so familiar yet so foreign.

This was wrong, this was all wrong.

"Mommy, you look funny." Tiny Chloe laughed. It was a taunting, mocking laughter that shook the woman to her core.

The woman felt herself crawl backwards and her breath left her in a small, punched-out huff, which she – she hadn't meant to do. "I'm tweaking. I'm tweaking." Bey shook her head and stood slowly on shaky legs, her fingers gripping the edge of the sink for support. The mirror above the sink came slowly into her line of vision but what stared back was not her reflection.

Well, it was her. It was always her. However, this mirror image appeared to be years younger. A teen with straightened blonde hair, sizing her up and down as if she were beneath her though the look in her sunken eyes seemed to scream for help. Tentatively, Beyoncé reached out, letting her fingertips graze the edge of the cool glass. It was solid. She wiped the perspiration away thinking that would change something, but the image of the doppelgänger never wavered. What surprised her most, however, was when the reflecting image reached out on her side of the mirror and placed her hand against the glass, displaying her almost perfect show of mimicry. Bey's gaze shot up from her hands to her face, searching for some kind of answer to her unspoken question.

What is going on?

Without warning, the image of the double vanished like she was almost never there. Bey stared deep into the mirror, touching her own face to make sure her body and reflection moved in sync with each other. "I-I gotta get out of here." She was rummaging through the cabinet under the sink. Whatever she was searching for, she was completely focused on and paid no attention to the fact that a three foot, pale faced, child stood creepily behind her, very nearly within touching distance.

"Mommy what's wrong?" Baby Chloe crooned with an earnestly confused expression on her face that was matched with a wince as black film covered her eyes and darkness seeped into her veins making them bulge like they'd pop if anyone were to touch her. But what was most disconcerting was the black blood staining the inside of Chloe's mouth and her teeth, making her look deathly grotesque.

"Mommy?"

The woman whipped around, dropping the bin of cosmetics she had pulled out from beneath the cabinet. Bathroom essentials scattered along the floor with a clang. She slipped on the water covering the floor and landed square on her backside. "Agh!" She back peddled, crab walking on her hands in a haste to put as much distance between her and the ashen faced girl as quickly as possible. The child gave a chuckle, "look mommy. I'm all dirty." She motioned to her pants, blood splattering onto her pink top as she spoke.

The blonde tried to open her mouth probably to let out a scream, most likely to vomit from her gradual decimation but nothing came out. She was so startled by the liquid that she didn't immediately examine the rest of the girl in front of her. "You're n-not real. You're not real." Bey repeated, her fear spiking as the girl walked closer.

"We're playing pretend?" The black film around her eyes had faded, allowing Chloe's natural color to shine through. Bey's eyes searched the depths of her daughter's, almost becoming lost in that rich chocolate brown color. The woman couldn't help taking her clammy hand into little Chloe's. "Ohh baby," she cried, no delineation between happy or sad tears.

The four year old poked out her bottom lip, looking up at the teary eyed woman. "Do I make you sad mommy?" Chloe's brow frowned, perfect black brows settling over steel brown eyes that were as cold as ice.

Bending to the child's height, Bey pushed a loc out of the girl's face. "No, of course not baby." She pulled the girl in for a hug, her brain focused solely on the freezing temperature of her child. Bey took a deep breath, hoping to calm her heart and her mind of the racing that their closeness seemed to invoke in her. After a few moments, she barely felt the brisk conditions of her daughter's body.

"Mama?" Baby Chloe pulled away and crossed her arms over her chest, shivering uncontrollably. "Why is it so cold?" The four year old asked, dripping more oozing blood down her chin.

The woman took her thumb and wiped the gory mess away. "I-I don't know," Bey ogled her hand with a disgusted expression and backed up, bumping hard into the sink. Baby Chloe wasted no time sidling next to her mother. Bey felt Chloe's tiny arms come around her, holding her against the cold, gripping her legs and looking beyond as if searching for the thing that went bump in the night.

Suddenly the woman's body was in excruciating pain. Her veins were on fire, burning like lava. The fire continued to burn, moving up along the back of her skull. Even her eyes hurt like hell. With all the energy she could muster, Bey pulled little Chloe from her legs only to pitch to the side as the world swayed around her. She couldn't see, couldn't smell. Couldn't hear. Everything was enveloped in darkness.

Is this death?

She felt around the room for the cabinet, pushing herself against it once she found it so she could lower herself safely to the floor and laid flat on her back; arms splayed out to the side. The incorporeal being did the same, copying, but curling herself into the terrified woman seeking comfort and safety in the embrace of a body that warmed her cold, gray, lifeless limbs.

This was wrong, Bey thought.

It was all wrong.

She was wrong.

When her tension headache subsided and she didn't need to grit her teeth to breathe properly, she assumed it was safe. At least safe enough to see if she had truly lost her mind. Bey waited until she could feel the blur fade from her vision to try to pry her eyes open.

"Okay." She huffed out. "Okay...come on." Slowly, she managed to pry one eyelid open then the next. Her breathing evened out as she found the bathroom just as it had been before, cramped and dirty. No signs of an appariti-

"Are you a superstar yet mommy?" Bey's head snapped over to the wall beside her then up towards the ceiling. There, only two inches away from her face, the chilling cruel smile of four year old Chloe, hovered over her, assaulting her senses. Dark russet colored blood oozed drop by drop from her small teeth onto Beyoncé's forehead as the girl smiled a lion's grin. "Are you number one?" The question came out soft but Bey didn't miss the daunting glare as more blood dripped onto her temple.

"What are you?" Bey inquired, her exhausted frame rested against the floor with an air of surrender and her eyes closed. She felt her cries try to bubble their way out but she was too malnourished to succumb. "Wh-what are you?!" Her chin quivered.

Baby Chloe climbed carefully onto her mother and rested her head upon her bosom, breathing in her warm, sweet scent. "Were you happy without me mommy?"

———FLASHBACK———

I grew up a little girl with

Dreams
   Dreams
      Dreams
          Dreams
                        Dreams
                      Dreams
                   Dreams
                 Dreams

Dreams, they come a long way, not today
Dreams, they come a long way, not today

"What am I gonna do? What am I gonna DO?!"

Bey frantically looked at the contents in her hand, struggling to believe what her eyes were telling her.

"This ain't happening, please, no nonono this can't happen. Not now." She was sitting on the border of the bathtub, holding a stupid white stick. How could something as harmless as a piece of plastic cause her so much pain? It wasn't the plastic's fault, she knew, but it was easier to blame it.

"No...Fuck," she said, and she wiped a few tears that were rolling down her cheeks.

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. She liked thinking she had her whole life planned, and once upon a time she had. When she was a little girl she dreamed of being a therapist and marrying a nice, intelligent man that would take her around the world before settling down and having two gorgeous children, maybe four if the first two were well mannered. Then on an off chance she learned that she could sing and dreamed of becoming a songwriter, or a producer; maybe even a dancer. Only a few minutes ago her plan had been to become a superstar who did it all, perform in arenas around the world, marry nice, and have a kid -in that order- but now her dreamed future was obsolete.

She tried to imagine how she would explain everything that had happened to her eight-year-old self. You're a singer, you can produce. You will become friends with Kelly, the girl everyone thinks is weird but it's okay because you're weird too. Kelly's gonna get adopted and become your sister. Kelly is a singer and y'all want to start a group. You'll start it with a lot of other girls but they won't take it seriously so now it's four of y'all making noise in Houston. You'll go to a Catholic school that's an actual hell hole. You'll meet a lot of people there. You will find most of them irritating. You'll get picked on throughout the day but it's okay because your group is getting noticed more and more everyday so you won't have to be there for long. There will be a boy who acts like a monster, and you will be hunted down like his prey. Nobody will notice your fight but you will fight even if it will be extremely hard and impossible. Nobody will help but you will make it out. You'll survive...

"... and you will carry his child," she finished her thought out loud. "Fuck!"

She couldn't do it. She couldn't bring a child into his world. It wouldn't be fair for the kid, she thought. Or for me, she added, with a pang of guilt. She hated herself for thinking about it that way, but she had to be sensible; a baby in those circumstances. Scratch that, a baby in any circumstance would only mean one more set back to her career. She'd already dealt with shady record labels and different managers that wanted to fill her head up with pipe dreams only to get a pay out. But this? THIS?!

"Oh no no no nonononono," Bey stood, plastic stick in hand as she paced up and down the small bathroom floor. "No...he—" Her right hand went to her scalp, tugging painfully at the roots. "I'm not pregnant. I'm not. I can't be! I'm too young!" She paused as another thought ransacked her brain. "My mama is gonna kill me!" She bit her nails down to the flesh. Her mother always told her that the habit was nasty but she couldn't help herself. Especially in a situation as big as this. "Forget about mama, my daddy's gonna rip my head off my shoulders!" Her voice pitched on the last word.

"I hate him!" She screamed. "Oh my Gooooood I hate him so much!" Her arms wiggled at her sides like a tantrum throwing child. "What am I gonna tell them?" She began pacing again. "They won't find out!" All of a sudden she became dizzy. "What is happening? What is happening whatishappening whatishappening?" She tried to breathe but nothing was coming out. On a dime, her pacing halted almost as if an unmovable stone wall had suddenly materialized before her eyes causing her limbs to be paralyzed. Her body was frozen exactly as it was, left arm clutching the plastic, right arm outstretched, while her hand covered her slightly open mouth, right foot somewhat forward, but her mind was as mobile as ever.

He did this on purpose. This is what he wanted. I hate him! I can't believe this!

"No!" Her shaky hand fell heavy against her thigh. "NO!" She screamed. Flashes of the conception overtook her mind. A strong hand around her throat. That disgustingly evil glare. "I didn't want that!" She spat out of pure disgust. The plastic stick went flying across the room, bursting upon impact and splitting into tiny little fragments of infallibility. "I don't want this!" She stood there, feeling very much alone with nothing but her reflection watching her somberly, the only sound a faint whimpering from herself.

She wiped the condensation off of the mirror from the shower water she pretended to make use of. The only words whirring in that head of hers was of her mother's. There's a gift for every occasion, even sad ones like death.

But this wasn't a gift. No no this was cold hard proof that evil existed. A testament that the devil was actually at the bottom waiting for her. "Even sad ones like death." The teen said aloud. She looked in the mirror once more "forgive me." Was her last statement. She busied herself cleaning up the mess she made, ensuring any and all evidence of that truth on a stick was discreetly discarded. She turned the shower off and stormed out of the bathroom, slamming the door in her wake with a newfound determination.

Even in death
                      Even in death
                                            Baby, I'm sorry but,
                      Even in death

I'm scared of lonely

———Present———

With a start, Beyoncé jerked out of her slumber on the tiled bathroom floor. Sssl. She pulled herself up and used the sink to balance her unsteady body. Little by little she turned off the faucet and removed the towel from the rest of her hair. She shook the memory away and frowned at her reflection. Check the cabinets again, her mind told her. She was grateful that it was her own voice speaking instead of Mike's. Using all of her will power, Bey began quietly rummaging through the messy cabinet. She was thankful after finding a brand new pack of toothbrushes coupled with a full sized tube of mint paste. She continued searching the cabinet. Every now and then she would peer over her shoulder ensuring the coast was clear. Her hand patted around the cabinet until it landed on one of those travel size manicure sets. Frantically she opened it quickly removing the peeling knife, small nail file, and the callus remover. Anything that could potentially unlock the chain once Mike locked her up again. Almost immediately she rolled the three tiny tools in tissue and tucked it securely in the waistband of her oversized pants.

"You decent?" Mike asked as he entered the bathroom again.

Bey rolled her eyes. Like that matters to you, she wanted to say. "Let me b-brush my teeth r-real quick."

He watched the entire time as she cleaned her pearly whites. "Hmspcht," Bey spat the white foam into the sink. "It's m-more if you wanted t-t-to brush yours."

"You saying my breath hot?" Mike crossed his arms over his chest.

Bey shrugged. "Think Blue a-already let y-you know."

Mike chuckled and for a split second Bey thought she saw something human behind those devilish eyes. "She did, didn't she?" Mike smiled as he took out another toothbrush. He rested his head in the crook of her neck as he began to scrub. "I always imagined days like this."

Bey upped a brow. "W-what about T-Tasha? Your w-wife?"

Mike spit before he began to speak again. "We never really had the connection that me and you have. She was a good partner don't get me wrong but that woman will follow me over a cliff. I like mine with a little bit more backbone." He took her hand, leading her back into the musty bedroom. "Did you know we only got married because she was pregnant?"

The blonde stopped in her tracks causing Mike to turn and look at her. "You good?"

"Y-yeah," Bey pushed a strand of wet hair out of her face. "I j-just didn't e-expect you to be a s-stand up guy like th-that."

"Like what?" Mike sat her on the bed.

"M-marrying a w-woman because she was h-having your baby." The words cut like shards of glass.

Mike fluffed the pillows behind the woman's back.  "Well I am from the south." He stated. "I was raised to do the honorable thing."

"F-find me a dictionary be-because I-I-I think you getting that definition m-mixed up."

Mike cut her a look."Beeeey" The way he drew out her name made the woman cringe. "Be careful with them jokes..." He was visibly flabbergasted and offended, which made Bey want to laugh so hard it hurt.

"Who said I-I was joking?" She asked.

Mike tapped the woman's leg letting her know that she needed to lay it flat for her restraints. Bey obliged, wanting to get the man out of her presence as quickly as possible. "I'm not as horrible as you think I am... I make mistakes like every human but I would never bring a child in this world out of wedlock. Of course I would marry the mother of my child."

"So y-you actually have a ch-child? You're somebody's f-father?"

Mike's eyes flashed with something, a hidden emotion. Bey didn't recognize the look. "You really playing with me..." He shook his head and secured the chain around her ankle.

The woman winced but otherwise didn't say anything. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to say. Distantly she thought about Tasha and Mike actually bearing children. She thought about how ironic it would be if they had their own child ripped from their arms by the state but didn't voice that thought.

Mike was looking at her now. There was no emotion behind his eyes and it was making her uneasy. "Wh-why y-you not with your o-own child r-right now? Where are they?"

"When are you gonna get it through your head?" he demanded, standing fully and moving back towards the door. "My kids are in the other room! One is in the closet!" He screamed.

Beyoncé watched him warily but didn't make a move. "No m-my kids are in the other room. Wh-where's yours?" Her voice was neutral. "Y-You said Tasha was p-pregnant so y-you married her. Tasha is-is DEFINITELY n-not Chloe or Halle's mother so wh-where's your child?"

—————————————

"He's gone Baba," Halle assured the young girl after a while, releasing her from the death grip she had her in.

"Why did you yell at him? He wanted to take me to the store to get food." Blue pouted. "we need foooood." She whined.

"I know Ivy Blue." Halle stood and headed toward the door that would lead her out of this room and start her chance at freedom. She knew the lock would be secured. He never made the mistake of leaving it unlatched. She always checked. "But he didn't mean it. Sometimes grown ups say one thing when they mean another." She grabbed the slinky and continued her attempt at unlocking the door.

"Like sarcasm?" Blue sidled up beside her sister.

"Well, sorta kinda." Halle nodded.

A furious growl echoed in Blue's mind. "He's stupid." She decided.

"Very." Halle chuckled dryly and continued to twist and turn the slinky, willing it desperately to please please please work. She and Blue were both starting to become restless and if they didn't get out they'd go stir crazy. Twist. Turn. Pull. Twist. Turn. Pull. That was the mantra playing over and over in the teen's mind. Twist. Turn. Blue's heart pumped with excitement as she heard a click signaling that whatever Halle did actually worked.

"I got it," Halle whispered with wide eyes. "I-I got it!" A satisfied smile spread across her face.

"You got it?" The little one needed confirmation.

Halle nodded frantically, unable to contain her excitement. "Now all we have to do is get Chloe." She pulled the door open a tad and was greeted with the stench of damp air. "You stay here okay? I'll go and get Chloe and I'll be right back." She popped open the thick wood just enough for her to slip through.

Blue pulled on her sister's shirt causing her to stop in her tracks. "I'm scared." Tears gathered.

Halle sighed but understood her sister fully. She too was scared, downright terrified but what was an even scarier thought was spending her last days at the will of someone she left in her tragic past. "I know you're scared Baba. I am too." She cooed.

"You are?" Blue whispered.

Halle nodded, taking her sister's hand and placing it over her drumming heart. Blue gasped at how fast it was beating. "You feel that?" The teen asked.

It was Blue's turn to nod.

"Just because I'm doing something brave doesn't mean I'm fearless." Halle whispered. "You have to try and be brave too."

"Why can't I come with you?" The tears streamed fast now.

Halle swallowed her spit and kneeled, pulling her little sister in for a long-winded much needed embrace. "Because I need you here. You're safe here as long as he doesn't come back. It's already a risk being out here by myself. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to you." She kissed Blue's forehead. "Plus you have one of the most important jobs right now." Halle found it in herself to smile.

"I do?" Blue looked utterly confused.

"Yeah," the thirteen year old ruffled her sister's hair. "I need you to be my lookout...let me know if you see him coming."

Blue wiped the snot from her nose. "Like I do at home so you can steal stuff from the kitchen?"

Halle rolled her eyes. "It's not stealing if it's in our kitchen Baba."

"Well mommy says it is." Blue countered. "She says if she told you not to get it and you still do then it's —

"Okay okay." The laugh Halle let out should've gotten her caught, but for now the coast was clear from as far as she could see. "If you see or hear him coming, distract him okay?"

The burn in Blue's throat from impending tears was nothing in comparison to the fear she would feel if the man caught her sister sneaking around the cabin and that was something she wasn't about to let happen. "Okay." She nodded earnestly. "I'll distract him."

For a moment Halle stood in the doorway, hand still clutching the knob. She only moved when Blue pushed her irritably at her back, trying to get her to hurry.

"Thank you." Halle carefully and as silently as possible closed the door leaving her whining sister on the opposite side.

"I can do this." She swallowed hard to stop her wild heart from jumping up and out of her throat. Quiet as kept, Halle tiptoed down the hardwood floors. She moved towards the living room like a ninja. She could hear Mike and her mother's muffled whisper of conversation but she couldn't make out any words. She didn't wait or stick around to try and make heads or tails of what they were discussing either. She bolted across the cabin ensuring her steps were heard by no one. Not even herself. It didn't take long for her to stop in her tracks as she was standing directly in front of the closet she knew her older sister occupied. "Chloe?" She whispered and received nothing in response. "Chloe!" She said a bit louder, peering over her shoulder ever so often. "Please answer me."

Still nothing.

"I'm gonna try and get you out." She glanced around irritably as she fiddled with the locks. The first one was easy. It was the run of the mil twist lock that was on most closets, but there was another deadbolt on top keeping the door secured and it was well out of her reach.
—————————————

Mike's eyes flashed again but not in the way that signaled he was about to do something stupid or noble. No, this was all anger. The man pushed himself from the door and sauntered over to the bed, peering down at the woman. The color of his eyes had darkened slightly. Bey had the foresight to be weary but a much stronger part of her just didn't care.

"I'm not gonna say it again! My kids are down the hall!" Mike said.  "You sitting there with that smug ass look on your face like you not the reason everybody's in this situation in the first place! Everything I've done since this whole thing started has been for you and these kids. To get this family back together. A family you came in and ripped apart in two seconds. A family I've worked so hard to build. You ruined it! You did that! The moment you showed up to my doorstep you ruined everything! I'm just trying to piece us back together! As for my child I have with Tasha? You don't get to question me about that. That's none of your fucking business! Focus on the ones we have! Like you should've been doing!" Mike's voice rose with each point until he was screaming. 

Faster than the human eye would be able to detect, she was sitting up stoic straight. Her own eyes have darkened. "That's what I'm trying to do but you got me l-locked up like some animal so I-I can't get to them!" She yelled back. "And you not doing nothing for me! Y-You doing all of this for yourself!"

"Myself? I brought this family together!" His hands were shaking and his breathing had become strained.

"You the one who ripped it apart! And we ain't your family. G-Go find that bastard you brought into this world and break that–that nasty bitch you call a wife out of jail! Bring THAT family t-together and leave mine the hell alone!"

She didn't feel Mike's hand move. Didn't register that his face had transformed into something far worse than anger. She did however, feel Mike's fist make contact and her body go flying back. She hit the headboard hard, and Mike was on her before she could blink. The man's hand wrapped around the thick sweater she wore, and he yanked her up so their eyes met. Their breath was mingling and they were both so angry.

"This is what you want!? You want me to treat you like this!? Don't you EVER in your fucking life mention my child do you hear me?! EVER!"

Bey's own hand moved to grip Mike's and he tightened his hold, accidentally ripping her locket from her neck. She didn't notice her missing necklace. "I-I hope you didn't treat your child like you treat me and m-mine." She griped. "Hope it's not a girl either. Lord knows what you put her through."

"I would never!" The man's voice was still angry but now it sounded almost desperate. Bey got the impression that Mike was pleading with her, although she wasn't sure what for. Still, the tone caused her to relax her hold.
————————————

I'm scared of lonely
And I'm scared of being the only
Shadow I see along the wall
And I'm scared the only heartbeat
I hear beating is my own
And I'm scared of being alone
I can't seem to breathe when I am lost
In this dream I need you to hold me

I'm scared of lonely

I'm scared of lonely

Blue stood behind the closed door listening for any signs of movement. She had the sound of her sister's chaotic footsteps memorized by now so she would know immediately if it was anyone else but her.

The young child took a meager step backwards, hands hooked together by her pint-sized pointer fingers. Slowly, her eyes roamed over the lightly lit room taking in the aged wallpaper, the tiny pink bed and the plethora of broken toys covering the floor. The room felt really old and empty, making strange creaking noises like its very bones were aching. She took in a frightened breath, just a piddling pant instead of a gasp to make the empty room aware of her shaky presence.

She stood.

She waited.

She huffed.

She stood.

She waited.

She huffed.

The hum of muffled but angry voices penetrating from the other room contrasted with the silence and loneliness here. For the first time in her life, Blue felt truly alone. She was born in the hustle and bustle of both of her parents' hectic lives. Forever surrounded by staff. Forever crowded by overzealous fans. Forever being whizzed from country to country whenever the entertainers suddenly decided to go on tour. Now...she was left with just her. Just her breaths. Just her thoughts. Just her fears. Blue wasn't impressed by the silence. No, not at all. It was merely strange —it was formidable and it began to affect her entire being. She backed away from the door, breath heaving, throat constricting then expanding as she attempted to calm herself. "Mommy?" She whispered and tripped over a doll, her bottom landing harshly on the edge of the twin sized bed. She sat there, making herself as comfortable as she could, hands resting on her lap, thumbs twiddling away.

She sat.

She waited.

She huffed.

The room felt huge yet as tiny as one of her doll houses as the six year old did her best to control her breathing. The desolate walls seemed to slowly condense encroaching on the child as she exhaled each terror filled breath.

Come on Halle. Come back come back come backkk.

Her tiny feet couldn't remain still as they fidgeted back and forth swinging with no sound pattern. Her fingers ran over the pink Barbie comforter and with a sudden sharp pain in her chest they began to squeeze the bedding; willing the odd ache away. Blue forced air out of her nostrils as her eyes darted back and forth around the area.

Chloe?

She knew that her oldest sister wasn't there but that didn't stop the need to be comforted by her kind words and warm hugs. A stray tear crept down her left cheek and she began to feel the bubbling of a cry deep in her stomach.

"Mommy." The word was whispered into the thick air as if it was a forbidden obscenity or carrying a dark secret.

The child gripped the bed sheets so tightly that her scrawny arms began to shake. She couldn't cry. No. Crying was for babies and as of...wait how long has it been? Roughly two days? As of two days ago she was officially a big girl. The big six as TeeTee Solo kept referring to it. She was a big girl and big girls didn't cry.

The child opened her mouth slightly to drag in some much needed oxygen. Her lip trembled as she warded off the urge to wail.

No.

No crying.

You're a big girl.

"Put a bubble in your mouth" Blue spoke into the night. Mrs. Harrison always says that it can calm anybody down. The child puffed air into her cheeks and tapped both sides with her index fingers. She inhaled again through her nose and held it as long as she could before blowing out.

Okay.

Think.

She stood, keeping a listening ear for signs of her sisters rushing back to the room so they could all make their hasty escape. The deafening silence roared loudly in her ear as she stared at the door. Why was it taking so long? She wanted so badly to run into her oldest sister's arms and press her cheek to the softness that was Chloe. Marvel at her sweet voice as she dished out directions telling her and Halle where to stand when to run, when to be loud, when to be quiet. She just missed her so very badly she allowed those tears she held back to come forth.

Maybe sometimes big girls do cry. Mommy cries all the time...especially when she's happy. Chloe cried that one time I think...when she visited that other family. I heard TeeTee Kelly and grandma talking about it. Plus she used to scream so loud in the night time it would wake everybody up and she's a big girl. Daddy says Chloe's the oldest so that makes her mature. Whatever that means. Maybe I can cry and be mature just like her. I can be little Chloe not Baby Bey Blehhh!

Blue forced herself to calm down, wiped away her tears as they fell.

Ugh! Why won't they stop! Stop crying Blue! Just... Stop. Be a big girl. Don't be like Halle!

Defeated, she placed her hands on her knees, looked down and watched as her tears touched the floorboards like raindrops from a cloudy and sunless sky.

There was a creak in the floorboards causing Blue to straighten up slowly. A muscle in her face flinched and she walked hesitantly keeping her steps light. Inch by inch she made her way towards the big wooden door. Trembling, her left hand reached for the broken knob, giving what was left of it a slight pull. The girl opened the door just enough so that she could peek her head out. Left and right she looked. She squinted and saw nothing, nothing but a glimpse of brown floating mid air. She knew all too well what it was. Halle's beautiful locs whizzing about in the front room. As quiet as a mouse, she retreated back into the bedroom, closing the door with a slight click and paced in a little circle of her own.
—————————

Halle stretched her right arm out as far as she could, taking extra steps to stand on her tiptoes. "Goddammit!" She whispered when she barely brushed the lock with the tips of her fingers. She sighed, looking around the room at all the strewn books from the toppled over shelf and frowned thinking about her next move. "Focus Lilbit...you have to focus baby." She repeated the words her mother muttered to her practically everyday since her diagnosis. The teen quietly made her way over to a few books, picking them up one by one until she was carrying four of them. "Focus focus." Walking back to the closet, she began stacking one on top of the other until she was left with a neat pile. It didn't take her long to climb it and soon she was holding the deadbolt in her hand fully. How am I gonna get this off, she wondered. She tried pulling on the lock hoping the force would kick off the metal latch then split the wood underneath but that made too much noise and she was too afraid of getting caught. The air wasn't helping either, the heat amplifying the anxiety she couldn't get used to, that feeling in the pit of her stomach that slowly stretched out to her limbs and somewhere something started to ache a bit.

There was a long drawn out sound of a door creaking open.

Her mouth became dryer than before and she licked her lips, trying to get some moisture to them. Hopping down from the stack of books, Halle looked around for something, anything that could possibly pick a lock as complicated as this one. "C'mon c'mon we need to get out of here." She hissed quietly. "I can't leave without you Chloe c'mon c'mon." She continued her frantic search.

————————————
Mike shoved almost gently against Bey and she moved back so he wasn't so in her face. He didn't move to fully get off the blonde and for the time being Bey did nothing.

"I would never in my life do anything to my own child. The only thing I did was love her...treat her like a princess." His tone was much softer, gentle even.

God, why couldn't her kids have that? Why couldn't they have the nice version of him, right now, rather than this deranged man? It wasn't fair; they'd been through so much. Too much. Chloe was barely old enough to drive, and Halle was barely old enough to be left at home by herself yet they'd endured this man for five years alone. Why her kids? Why them? Why did life keep throwing so many hurdles for them to overcome?

Bey wiped a single tear from her face. "W-Why couldn't you treat mine like that? Why'd my kids get abused and not y-yours?"

Mike frowned and shut his eyes. No. He wasn't about to go there. The thoughts would become an endless loop of anxiety and loneliness he wasn't willing to put up with right now. But it looked like the blonde wouldn't take silence for an answer. "Because she was daddy's little girl and nobody could replace her." There was something different from aggression and resentment lurking beneath his words. He was truly devastated and anger wasn't getting him anywhere. Mike sighed and rubbed his hand over his head. His eyes were hidden from her but when he looked up Bey saw something she'd never gotten a glimpse of – she saw a human being with feelings. And he looked completely destroyed.

——FLASHBACK——

*MIKE'S INITIAL INTERROGATION*

[Dated One Year Ago]

A barrel-chested detective opened the door to the interrogation room and held it open for his much younger assigned interrogation partner, Snyder, before shutting it quietly and taking a seat at the table across from Mike. They sat for a moment as the grey haired investigator glared at Mike and his partner aligned his folders. A satisfied smirk worked its way across Mike's face as he looked at the two detectives. "So this is all y'all got left? Good cop, bad cop?" He snorted. "Pathetic."

Neither men responded. The oldest one obviously wanted to as he shifted in his seat, but he agreed to let his partner run the show for now. If nothing else, he trusted the younger man to get a confession. However, the rookie detective didn't say a word. He simply stared at Mike like he was a Rubik's cube; if you twist in the right places, everything would line up.

Just when it looked like Mike was growing bored or even complacent, the younger man broke the silence. "Why won't you confess?" He asked in a disinterested tone.

Making a noise that could be misinterpreted as a laugh, Mike shook his head. "Because I didn't do it." He sounded exasperated before his tone turned to anger. "Maybe instead of questioning me, you should be out there looking for a real criminal."

Nodding, the man continued as though Mike had never spoken. "Is it because you know what they'll do to you in prison?" Still not interested. "That must be it. You must be afraid."

Mike's face darkened. "Why you think I'm scared of anything they'll do to me?" Barely controlled anger in his voice.

"Because the inmates watch the news every night. They'll know what you are and they'll make you pay for it. Even other criminals don't like child molesters." Snyder said, leaning back in his chair.

When Mike merely glared at him, the leading detective leaned forward on the table again and continued speaking. "If you're completely honest with yourself, you don't have any other reason to be holding out on us." He said, looking directly at Mike now. "Your wife will be taken to prison for her involvement and..." he shuffled his papers. "You have a deceased daughter. What is there for you to go back to? Madison is dead."

"You keep my daughter's name out of your filthy fucking mouth!" Lunging forward, Mike latched onto one of the man's forearms with the one hand that wasn't shackled to the table. "Do you hear me?!" He roared. "Don't you dare say her fucking name again!"

The eldest detective jumped up to grab Mike, but his partner was faster. Snyder twisted his arm out of Mike's, and reversed the hold, slamming the criminal's hand down on the table. Mike was so surprised by the unassuming agent's unexpected reaction, it took him a moment to pull out of the grip. The tension in the small room was tangible at that moment, but the younger detective sat back down as if nothing had happened and Mike relaxed his tense posture slightly. The eldest man also sat back down and the interrogation resumed.

"I know what happened to your daughter." Snyder said, aware that he had touched a nerve; the nerve he was hoping for.

"So you said..." Mike replied coldly, attempting to not portray much emotion.

"I know everything that happened to your daughter. Even the things you never told anyone."

Mike looked sharply at Snyder and then looked away. "You don't know anything." He muttered angrily.

"I do know what I'm talking about, Mr. Williams." Snyder said.

When this drew no reaction from the criminal across the table, he spoke again. "Look at me." The tone of his voice surprised everyone; he didn't raise the volume, but so much force and authority went into the command that it almost made his partner look at him too.

Now that he had Mike's attention, he drew a picture of a seven-year-old girl with dark hair and darker eyes. Friendly eyes. "Madison Williams."

Mike didn't look angry anymore, but his face was steadily losing color.

"Did you treat her like you did your foster daughters?"

Mike opened his mouth to snarl something angrily, but Snyder spoke over him. "Don't deny it, I know it's true. Your profile screams having done this before. You're too calm. Too cavalier about the whole thing. Any guy in your shoes would be sweating in his seat. So did you do the same thing to Madison Williams? Your daughter?" His voice was still dead calm.

The change in Mike was profound. His eyes were wide, his voice was faltering, he looked as though he was broken. "N-not her... not Maddy, not ever! I never laid a hand on Madison!"

"You did that to your own daughter and when she died, you moved on to someone else's daughter..." Snyder's partner was beginning to wonder how he could keep speaking with such dispassion, but it seemed to be working.

"No! I would never do what you saying to my own kid! What kind of man are you trying to make me out to be? Yes Me and Chloe sometimes had a sexual relationship but it wasn't like it was something she was opposed to. She never said no!  Not once! And Halle? Fuck it! All she said was true. I touched her and probably did whatever the hell else she claimed, but I never touched Madison! Ever!" Mike collapsed on the table and a strange sound escaped his lips that no one expected. He let out unearthly sobs as he realized what he had just revealed.

Snyder- quiet, without ever raising his voice, had brought tough, brawny Mike Williams to tears. And all he did was stand, collect his folders, and utter two words. "I know."

Mike looked up as both detectives left the room. "You... you tricked me!" But the rest of his shouts were lost on the two men as they shut the door.

——PRESENT——

"I would never...I would never." Mike repeated to himself as he zipped up a black hoodie.

"Wh-Where you going?" Bey rasped when he headed towards the door but thanks to the quiet cabin he heard her loud and clear. Anytime he left the room she was paranoid he'd hurt one of her children.

"To the store...Didn't you ask me to get them some food?" He turned to face her.

Seemingly unimpressed, Bey studied him with the cool composure of someone who didn't really want to give up hostilities. "I-I didn't think you c-cared what I had to say..."

Her scrutiny left him feeling oddly exposed, and Mike couldn't avoid cringing a bit. "I don't but I was tired of hearing them screaming and hollering. Plus I know you hungry too." He said, but unlike his eyes, his voice was holding emotions that made her want to scream in agony. He approached the bed and used his index finger to trace the outline of her jaw, stopping at her chin. He tilted his head and looked at her like he was seeing her for the first time and he was trying to take in every detail of her face. "And I'd do anything for you." She heard him sniff at her scent and it caused repulsion to creep up the back of her neck. "I want you like I've never wanted anyone or anything in my entire existence," he said and Bey just watched him without a word. "I fear losing you to the point where I think I might lose my mind..."

Might? Bey thought. It was at this moment she realized the man was completely out of his mind. She knew he was on the verge of a true mental break but this confirmed it for her and for that reason and that reason alone, a tiny tear left her eye and slipped down her cheek. Mike used his thumb to brush it away. "I don't love you like a regular person loves another, Beyoncé, I love you like the monster that I am. The monster you think I am. I don't want a part of you, I want all of you. I know you feel something for me."

She groaned and shook her head in response.

"You don't have to say it. I know I excite you in a way that no one else does...I push, you push back...I say 'stay' you say 'let's go'. I say 'yes' and you say 'no'. A part of you is scared of me and in a twisted way you love it...you crave that fear." He headed towards the door again.

"Oh by the way, I'm taking Blue with me." He announced and attempted to close the door.

"What? Why?" Bey rushed out, sitting bolt upright in bed despite the pain in her abdomen.

Mike shrugged. "So I know you'll be here when I get back." He stepped closer to the bed, peering down at her.

Her facial expression could not hide the shock at his suggestion.

Someone, anyone...help me...help me...

"Mike don't don't d-do this, p-please," she begged. "This not enough?" She slapped her restraints. "You gotta take my baby a-a-as leverage too?" She asked in a broken voice and Mike was this close to changing his mind. He shifted, long fingers tangling in the blonde wealth of her hair to curl at the nape of her neck. He pulled her forward, shifting her closer towards him.

"She'll be okay. It's just a quick store run." He mumbled against her mouth.

Heart pounding, Beyoncé scoured the man's face for a sign that he was bluffing, however there was none. "The c-closest one g-gotta be what five, six miles out? That's not a quick run..."

He frowned, his dark brow furrowing. "Why you don't trust me with her? I ain't harmed her in any way." The man seemed genuinely confused.

"It's not that. It's..." the woman tried to think of something quick. "P-People are g-gonna recognize her a-a-and wonder why she's with some random man."

He was silent for a moment, shifting the possibilities over in his mind. "Then Babygirl can come."

"No!" Bey blurted out. "I-I mean..." she cleared her throat. "Halle's n-not gonna act right. She's g-gonna get y'all noticed too."

"Baby girl gone do whatever I tell her." He affirmed, his gaze searching hers.

Both brows frowned and she felt his thumb trace the curve of her lower lip. "She's not...i-if you take h-her outside she's gonna run. She'll freak out. That baby is t-terrified of you. Can't you see th-that?" She inquired, softly, looking up at him with a mixture of curiosity and confusion. "She'll m-make a scene going anywhere a-alone with you. If you gotta t-take somebody as l-leverage, take me..."

Please...please...let me go...let me run... let me get help

Immediately, she watched as Mike's gaze shifted, eyes turning almost black as the anger enveloped his emotions. "That's not an option." He pushed out through clenched teeth. His fingers tightened their hold on the back of her neck and he pulled her closer, forcing her head to tilt back. He loomed over her, almost as if he was attempting to intimidate her. "That's too big a risk. Like you said with Blue, people gone recognize you."

Bey swallowed a lump in her throat just as the second sentence came to mind.

Please Lord forgive me. Please, please forgive me.

"T-Take sweetpea. She's q-quiet..." She toyed with the lint balls on her sweater.

The thought seemed to appeal to him, a sly smile forming at the corners of his lips.

"Sh-she'll do what y-you say no questions a-asked." Her tone went a touch too high and he immediately picked up on the attempted deflection. It was something she was a fan of, and if you didn't know her well, you wouldn't notice it. You wouldn't see the tiny crinkle that formed between her brows. You wouldn't see the way she would move her fingers ever-so-slightly as if her body tried to reject her words.

——————————————————————

There was more movement. Heavier this time. Blue flinched again, swallowed twice and opened the door so abruptly that it nearly rammed into the wall behind it.

A foot.

She could see Mike's foot at the entryway to the next bedroom. The bedroom she knew her mother was in. Nothing was ever too quiet when they were in there together. Yelling and screaming from both was all she ever heard. Without thinking, Blue shut the door, not caring if it was quiet or not. What was the word Halle said again? She was allowing her mind to fail her as panic began to set in. Dis...dis...distract! Yeah I have to distract him! Just by having the realm of silence and the space to think, her ideas started to appear. The little one ran in search of something, anything that could help her out in this situation. Full tilt, Blue's worried eyes scanned the room, landing quickly on an electrical outlet. Mrs Harrison had taught her so much about electricity, starting with Benjamin Franklin and ending with currents. She rummaged through dolls, toy trucks, and various playthings until her hand landed on an animatronic toy puppy. It was silver with a black led screen for eyes. The six year old looked over her shoulder and without a second thought she threw the pup down with as much energy she could muster up. It cracked on the first try and she smiled with everything but her eyes. All sorts of wires were exposed; they were all kinds of colors, tangled up and everything just like she remembered from class. "Yes!" She whispered to herself. But she didn't have much time to revel in her achievement because she still had a job to do. A really really big job. Blue dropped to her knees, pulling back the leftover plastic pieces that remained on the body of the toy until all she was left with were the exposed wires and a single battery pack.

One of her hands clutched a blue wire while the other one held a red one. Hands steady, eyes unblinking, she hardly allowed herself to breathe while gently piecing together the two tiny wires. They were very, very important and had to be juuuust riiiight...

Blue tapped the two wires together, producing a tiny spark. It worked! It really worked!

"Whoa!" She raised her brows and licked her lips, concentrating. She was really into this stuff.

She recalled the day Mrs Harrison showed her class how to make a lightbulb glow bright as the summer sky. It was a good learning day that day. She stayed on green until after recess which was a huge step in her book.

Now for the real test!

In seconds Blue stood, still clutching the wires in her hand. She shuffled over to the wall where the outlet was and kneeled before it, preparing to stick the exposed wires inside but became jittery and maybe feeling like this wasn't such a great idea. Or she just wanted her mommy to hold her hand through this. "I have to distract him." Blue whimpered, pressing closer to the outlet. "I have to distract him." She said to herself almost too loud. The little girl was working herself up. "I have to distract him." She repeated one last time before tapping the wires together once more, longer this time. It emitted a soft buzz and the hair on the six year old's arms stood when she leaned even closer to the outlet. She shook her head slowly when she realized just how much damage she could cause to herself by doing this. Her grandmother always warned her not to play with outlets, but this wasn't playtime. She had to distract the man, like her big sister said. With that, no other thought was needed. Blue rammed the wires into one of the little openings. A whirring started to accompany the static buzzing sounds and sparks of blue light began to gather inside the otherwise dark outlet. The girl had only a second to appreciate the beauty of the dancing blue light before a shower of sparks sprayed against the severed wires. In an almost gleeful way, the lighting went out, plunging her into pitch darkness save for the occasional spark. She turned to where she knew the nightstand was, the clock no longer displayed that never changing number. She whipped her head towards the door just underneath and could see that the hallway was also darkened, not a single light was visible as far as she could see, but what she could hear was Mike's loud complaining.

"You gotta be fucking kidding me!" The man shouted. She heard his heavy footsteps pass by the door going towards the back of the cabin then back to the room her mother occupied. "Power outage. Shit."

Blue swallowed hard to stop her wild heart from jumping up and out from her throat. Out of sheer disbelief, she was cemented in her spot by the wall, unable to comprehend that she was able to cause a commotion that big.

"I...genera...Outback" She could barely hear what the man had muttered but she could tell he was terribly upset.

An emotionless mask moved back and forth as the child stared in the direction of the door, clenching her fist to stop her hands from shaking. She hoped the man wouldn't come inside the room. Not when her sisters weren't there. Not when she was alone. Halle had warned her to never be alone with him. Said something about never letting him see her cry if she was. And Blue couldn't promise to hold up her end of the bargain. She didn't know if she could stop these destitute tears from spurting like an impending storm.

"Hurry up!" Blue whispered into the dark. "Hurry before the man comes back." Blue raised a hand to wipe at her tear-streaked face before she heard a door slam followed by hurried approaching footsteps.

She stood with baited breath.

She waited for the footsteps to pass.

She huffed when she couldn't hear anything else when suddenly a shower of sparks flew up from the exposed wiring to land on her exposed arm, sending her crashing backwards into the nightstand. It broke when she landed on it, of course, sending her to the floor in a pile of children's books and broken wood. Blue was known for playing rough and thus could normally shake off a knee scrape or minor injury, but again this was not a playground and these were no average showers of sparks. Superheated by the nature and structure of the wires to a blistering 250 degrees fahrenheit, they darted upwards, sizzling upon contact with her cool skin. Hooded eyes snapping wide open with surprise, Blue unleashed a tremendous roar of pain that reverberated throughout the small cabin. She paused her screams just to gauge at the damage on her hand. There were blisters on her fingertips and palm, ones that were red and angry.

In that same moment, Halle burst through the door, slamming it hard behind her. She raced over to her sniffling sister. "What's wrong Baba?" Worried eyes searched the entirety of the child's body, quickly landing on the hand that Blue held to her chest. "What happened?"

Turning around, Blue surveyed the damage she'd done to the little table. Crushed was a good word for it, or flattened, pulverized, broken beyond repair...

Curling and uncurling her fingers, Blue's eyes glossed over. "I distracted him." She gripped her right hand firmly and held it out so that Halle could survey the damage. "See?" She said while the older girl looked on in despair.

"Oh no Baba." The teen lamented, reaching out attempting to grab her sister's injured hand, but Blue immediately jerked away.

Halle kneeled, moving as close to Blue as she could. "Here, let me see." Her eyes flickered down to the hand.

Cowering sheepishly, Blue raised her palm to the teen's eye level evoking an awestruck gasp. "Did you stick something in the outlet?" She asked, placing one hand on her hip while Blue looked on embarrassed.

Getting a nod in response, Halle leapt to her feet. "Why would you do that?" She chastised her sister.    "You know you're not supposed to play with electricity! Blue you're six not two! You could've killed yourself!" She cursed herself for sounding a little too much like her mother.

"The man was coming! You said to distract him!" Blue yelled back, still clutching her throbbing hand.

"You could've screamed!" Her brain was scrambling trying to come up with something else. "Threw these toys around...ANYTHING!" She stood, looking down at her younger sister with a stern face. "Not stick your hand in an outlet! Mommy is gonna kill me for leaving you alone. OhmygodohmyGod" she paced the room up and down.

"Slll!" Blue winced after attempting to wiggle her fingers.

Sticking both hands in her jogger pockets, Halle slowed her pacing to a stop, taking a seat beside the whimpering child. Now sitting almost shoulder to shoulder, Halle let out an exhale that was only partly nerves. "It's gonna be okay," she said, attempting to sound nonchalant while her hands fidgeted in her pockets, finding stray pieces of thread and pulling at them.

"It hurts." Blue whined, gazing up at her.

There was a moment of silence while the two just looked at the red blisters. "Could've been worse." Halle finally spit out. "At least it's not burned burned. You just have a few blisters. I bet grandma has something that can get rid of'em like that." She snapped her fingers.

Blue sniffled, leaning her head against Halle's shoulder. "You think grandma misses us?"

The teen leaned into her sister's embrace. "I think grandma is worried sick right now."

Both girls turned their heads towards the window after hearing loud banging and obscenities being yelled. It wasn't like they could see out of the black painted windows but still. "What's that noise?" Blue asked.

Halle shifted, so that her head rested lightly on Blue's. "Mike must be starting up a generator or something. I think you blew the fuse to the entire cabin. All of the lights went out at the same time."

"Really?!" Blue beamed back at her.

"Mmhm." Halle nodded with a yawn. "Scared me half to death. You know I don't do the dark, but thank you though. It gave me time to get back without being seen...still can't believe you did that. Where'd you even learn something like that?"

Blue shrugged. "Mrs. Harrison taught me. That's what happens when you go to school...they teach you stuff."

"Well Mrs Harrison should've taught you to put something over your hands when you're dealing with stuff like that."

Taking a deep breath in to stop her stomach from rumbling Blue asked, "where's Chloe? You couldn't get her out?"

Halle swallowed thickly. "The lock wouldn't come off...I'm not strong enough."

"So we're stuck." Blue commented hesitantly.

Halle froze at that word, unable to move even when Blue poked her in the stomach with her good hand. "No, it just means we're on our own. We have to leave by ourselves to get help for mommy and Chloe."

"When?" Blue pondered.

"The moment Mike leaves to go to the store...we make our move."

—————————————————

"Get up," Mike barked the order after unlocking the closet door. "Chloe." He touched her shoulder gently and she flinched even in a sleep-like state. "Chloe!" He yelled this time, pushing her against the wall of the closet.

Lights. Really bright lights. Everywhere. It was all Chloe could see when she tried to open her eyes. That harshness of the light stung when she finally cracked them open, so she closed them again. Her mouth felt dry. A pathetic attempt at clearing her throat made no difference, so she begrudgingly forced her eyes open, squinting at the brutal whiteness that surrounded her, and pushed herself up from her lying position. She grunted at the pain that ran through her chest and head but ignored it. When her eyes had adjusted, she looked around, hoping to find water. She struggled to turn to inspect her surroundings enough for a drink, but from the view that she did have, she found Mike staring down at her.

"You letting me out?" Chloe croaked out, her voice meek, but still loud enough for the man to understand.

"We going for a ride." He stated firmly.

She looked up at him with stunned eyes for a moment too shocked for words. "A ride?" The timidness in her eyes nearly shattered his heart into a million pieces, but he couldn't let her notice.

"Yeah...get up." He ordered. There was an edge to his voice that made her shiver.

"I'm not going anywhere with you." She stated simply. "The fuck?" She mumbled afterwards with a roll of her neck.

Mike fought to keep the anger he felt off his face as he bent lower, grabbing hers. "Such a wicked tongue, just like your mama." He hissed.

She slapped his hand away, so he sighed, standing at full height. "I'll let you decide then. What will it be, baby Bey, Babygirl, or you going on a ride with me?" He smirked already knowing her answer. She was too much of a mama bear to her siblings to let them travel alone with a man so unhinged.

The teen's eyes got real wide. "No...I–I can go." She cleared her throat and stood, dusting her hands off on her jeans. His face was stretched in a toothy grin, too happy to remember to sport his signature cocky smirk. "I can't believe I'm saying this but...I might have missed your face."

Chloe decided to ignore him. "How's my mom, is she okay?"

"You didn't even ask how I was doing." He chastised her. Again Chloe ignored him.

"She's fine...up talking and bossing me around."

The beautiful smile she responded with sent his chest and belly into flutters. Has she always had this effect on me?  The question flitted across his mind before he forgot himself in her presence again.

"How's her head?" She whispered and her eyes shimmered with sadness.

He wanted her in his arms, but they had never been so close, never hugged like that, and he was terrified of how fragile she seemed. Instead he furrowed his brows and softened his voice. "I mean I ain't really looked at it." He admitted.

She dropped her gaze, lips quivering with overwhelming heartache, shaking her head wordlessly. Mike closed the distance between them and held her to him. Naturally, Chloe pulled away but Mike pulled her in again, wanting to cherish this moment. What is happening, Chloe thought as the man stroked her back until she calmed down a little. Why is he being so nice to me?

They stayed like that until she spoke again, muffled against his chest. "Can I see her before we go on the ride? Can I talk to her? Just for two minutes?"

Her mother was her safe haven in the absence of Shawn. She needed to see her to get her mind in check. She needed her mother to tell her everything would be okay.

"Why?" He ever so gently lifted her chin to meet his gaze.

"I just need to see her face. That's all. I won't do anything to make you mad. I promise. I need to know she's okay...see her with my own two eyes. Please." She begged.

The man grunted, which she took as an affirmation. Mike had one hand on his gun and one hand reaching out for the teen. Chloe was so surprised she forgot to grasp the open palm. Instead she tilted her head looking baffled.

"What?" He asked but her words were stuck in her throat.

A smile drifted over his lips. "I'm not gonna hurt you." He promised.

She considered their last encounter with those words and something in her chest twinged. "You always say that."

"But this time I mean it."

Chloe was just looking at him with that familiar impatient expression.

"You remind me so much of her it's crazy sometimes." He growled low in his throat. Fear shot up her spine. She was paralyzed with it. She couldn't tell if he was angry or completely captivated. His facials all looked the same to her; crazed and animalistic.

The residual panic must've shown on her face, because the man frowned. They were both silent for a beat, standing together alone with nothing but awkwardness to keep them company. Chloe shifted from one foot to the other attempting to rid herself of the pins and needles seemingly swarming around in them. "My mom..." she raised one brow and twitched her lip the same as Bey which caused Mike to let out an almost silent chuckle. "Come on." He casually threw one arm over her shoulder, leading her down the hall. Chloe's mind raced and varied in thoughts as she counted out her steps.   The trek felt like an eternity of clenched fists and words yet unsaid. She held her breath all the way up until they reached the door. Quickly she glanced down the hall towards the other room she knew her sisters occupied before Mike twisted the knob. "Don't go in there making a scene. You just checking up on her and that's it. Nothing else. Got it?"

Chloe's hands clenched and unclenched as she inhaled greatly and exhaled solemnly. "Okay...I got it."

She watched impatiently as Mike took his keys and unlocked the door, pushing it open shortly after. Chloe yanked her hand away from the man and rushed inside, eyes searching frantically for her mother. She stopped in her tracks after her gaze landed on the bug-eyed woman staring daggers at her.

"Sweetpea," Bey called with an outstretched arm but no attempt at moving toward her daughter who too appeared confined to where she stood.

It was then Chloe noticed the gaudy restraint on her mother's ankle. She couldn't stand to see her this way. "Mommy." Her voice broke as she swallowed a cry.

"Come h-here baby," Both of Beyoncé's arms were outstretched now, beckoning with doleful eyes for the girl to come closer. "Come to y-y-your mama please." It was like she'd die without her daughter wrapped in her arms right this second.

Mike gave the teen a light nudge forward, but Bey fixed him with a fierce grimace anyway. Chloe gulped, taking measured steps toward the messy bed. Once she was close enough to really take in her mother's physical state, all of her thoughts turned to worry. The blonde's face was completely pale, and a large dark purple circle was around her eye. She sat almost in the woman's lap, noting how the bruise on her forehead began to fester and crust around the edges. The woman looked older but Chloe guessed that's what happened after going through the horrors her mother had survived. She looked completely vulnerable as if she would break altogether from a single tap on the shoulder. The girl had never once seen her mother like this, so broken, she couldn't get used to it.

Beyoncé tried to pull her daughter in for a much needed hug but the teen recoiled. Scared to cause her mom any more pain, Chloe lightly and gently grabbed her hand and interlocked their fingers, offering all her strength to her, knowing she would need all she could get. The small gesture assured Bey of her child's presence and that she would be okay, assurance that she knew she needed. "Hey baby," Bey whispered and gave a sweet smile as she pushed her daughter's hair from her face.

"Hey mama," Chloe's lips quivered as she tried to be strong.

Bey stroked the back of her hand attempting to comfort her.

Mike stood by the open door looking on with a frown playing at his lips. They were so dramatic, he thought. "I told her she had two minutes."

The woman looked at him and nodded, shifting uncomfortably on the bed and mumbling something incoherent. On a drop of a dime, Chloe began fluffing the pillows behind her mother's back, wanting to soothe her pain in any way possible.

"Thank you," Bey cooed despite the pain shooting through her entire body. Chloe could no longer take it, the look of defeat in the woman's hazel eyes as they filled with a pool of wet tears as she looked at her. She gingerly put both of her hands around her mother and carefully cradled the back of the blonde's head with her right hand as her left hand tentatively stroked her back. Bey fully accepted her child's open comfort and wrapped her arms around her as far as her injuries would allow. "He w-wants to take y-you s-somewhere." She whispered.

"I know," Chloe said so that only her mom could hear.

"Baby, y-y-you gotta get help." She rushed out, eyes locking with her captor's. "Be loud the f-first chance y-you get. Get somebody's a-attention okay?" She said, allowing all the anger she felt toward the man to dissolve at least for the time being. Anything to get her point across to the teen in front of her. "If y-you can, don't c-come back h-here Sweetpea." She spoke with such force but the teen still recognized the terrified tremor in her throat.

Hearing the strong, hot-headed woman cry made Chloe want to just cry herself back to sleep, beat the living hell out of the person responsible, and hold her mother all at the same time. Then she felt Bey's warm tears reach the left shoulder of her shirt as she stifled a breakdown. "Please d-don't come b-back baby." Bey choked out, wanting to just hold the girl forever. "Don't come back."

She felt Chloe nod "I'll try mommy." The teen pulled away, looking into her mother's openly affectionate eyes, and nearly began crying from the guilt she felt for having to leave her. "I'll try." She repeated sadly.

"Two minutes up." Mike announced, approaching the bed.

Beyoncé took Chloe's head into her hands, bringing their foreheads together. "Be careful baby." She kissed her cheek. "Please, please be careful." She pecked her again. Chloe and Bey connected fingers, entirely looped together. Every detail in their unified hands, same, without any variation whatsoever. Once in a while, they would squeeze the other's hand in order to be assured of their presence. That this wasn't a dream.

Another minute passed, and Chloe opened her eyes. "I love you." She cried.

"I-I love you too baby...s-so so much. You j-just don't know." The woman wiped her child's face free of tears as she shook her head. "I love you m-more than I-I love me."

Her statement left them quiet as Mike and Chloe just looked at her. The man decided to break the uneasy silence. "Aight," he pulled at Chloe's shoulder, making her stand.

Immediately Beyoncé hid her face into her hands, physically unable to watch her daughter get pulled away from her by a man so irredeemably evil. She felt a tingling sensation in her throat, and she wanted to gag but she had to be strong. If she panicked then Chloe would panic and that would send the man into a hate-filled frenzy.

The teen couldn't help but steal repeated glances back at her mother who in this moment appeared to be hiding herself from the world.

"See you," Chloe called over her shoulder, one foot out of the door.

Beyoncé's eyes continued to look elsewhere as a single tear slid down her cheek. "S-see you Sweetpea." She whispered, her voice shaking with each word.

Before Mike and Chloe could exit the door completely, Beyoncé lifted her head, fixing her gaze on the man with the strong grip on her daughter's arm. "Y-you not gonna h-hurt her are you?" She asked him just above a whisper, her wandering morbid thoughts overwhelming her and winning her inner battle.

"Not if she listens," he rubbed Chloe's arm up and down.

Bey knew what that meant but she pushed her feelings down and nodded.

"We'll be right back," Mike assured before he closed the door, locking it behind him.

Beyoncé found herself all alone with only her thoughts to keep her company. Tears of anger and overwhelming emotions were released down her cheeks. "Even in death." She muttered sadly. "Baby even in death."

I hoped till morning, as a lion so hath he broken all my bones: from morning even to night thou wilt make an end of me. —The Bible

————————————

Sometimes I feel I'm going down, down
Sometimes I feel I'm gonna die at times
Got my dreams and my eyes wide— Solange Knowles

Don't come back. Don't come back. Get help and don't come back. Chloe bit her fingernails as Mike took his sweet time unlatching each lock on the back door. Don't come back. She clung to her mantra but the fear continued to rise and twist around her, strangling, pulsating blackness, serpent like in its movement. She looked over her shoulder down the hall to the furthest room. The room her sisters lay most likely malnourished and terrified. I gotta get my sisters some help, she thought just as her own stomach grumbled loudly. "Let's go." Mike barked.

Too busy with her inner thoughts, Chloe hadn't noticed the man was outside waiting for her to follow him. Slowly she gave him a long-winded once over. The man made sure he had his gun concealed inside his waistband, but the teen could still spot the bulge hidden underneath his jacket. "Don't do nothing stupid...now I said let's go."

But her eyes were still wide and glued to his face.

He waited for her.

Finally, she asked, "where are you taking me? Where are we going?" She looked beyond him this time, cringing at the miles of dark wooded area just a few feet away.

"To the store," he gruffed out.

"How do I know you're not lying?" Her voice was soft and sad and he swore he could feel his heart skip a beat. "I guess you don't."

There was silence for a few beats. Chloe's throat tightened with something unnameable — what is he going to do to me? — and she forced it down. "I can't wait until you wake up and realize that you made the biggest mistake of your life." Her voice was harsher than she intended it to be but he needed to hear it.

"I can't wait for that too." She could hear the regret in his voice.

"You don't have to wait to realize anything if you're feeling those feelings right now. I mean, yeah you did something terrible but you can still come back from this. It doesn't have to go any further. You can let us go...go on the run...flee to Mexico or Cuba or wherever people go when they're in a bind. It doesn't have to be this way."

Silence again.

Mike wasn't even looking at her. "It's not that simple."

"Isn't it?" She was glaring now, danger be damned.

"You wouldn't understand," he said stiffly, feeling strangely like a petulant, stubborn child.

Chloe braced herself on the doorframe. "I'm scared," she whimpered.

Mike shifted his weight. "I told you I'm not gonna do nothing to you. We just going to the store to get y'all something to eat..."

The teen thought about the plethora of times Mike would say anything to get her to come out of her hiding spots. The lies he told her to get her to participate in his mannish ways. Why should she believe him now? Why did she need to accompany him to the store? Why couldn't he leave her in the closet and bring back the goods like he used to? Something was off. Something just wasn't right. "Please don't hurt me," she was tearful again, choking out her words. "My family needs me. You say you love my mom? You love my sister, right? Well they need me. If you...if you hurt me they won't forgive you. You'll never have that family you always dreamed about." The gut wrenching loneliness she felt in this moment filled up her lungs and throat and her insides like black tar and she couldn't breathe. Doubling over to gather more breath, she began counting aloud. "100, 99, 98..."

Mike rolled his eyes dramatically. "Here you go with this shit." He folded his arms across his chest.

"87, 86, 85," the teen continued, but little did he know, Chloe was working herself up for something. "84, 83, 82—

She took off in a full sprint in an attempt to rush past Mike and head steadfast towards the trees, but being ill-fed acted as a wet blanket to her usual breakneck speed. In no time, he caught her by the waist sweeping her off of her feet. His reaction was a lot more animalistic than human; before she could even cry out Chloe was flat on her back, dazed and breathless. Mike was boring down on her, his eyes wide and dark and feral. Paralyzed with fear, Chloe watched the last light of the fading sun catch in his gaze; it was like watching a fire ignite.

"You don't think I was prepared for that? How long have I known you? How many times have we been through this?" He screamed, straddling her waist.

"You proud of that?" She replied, still gasping a little. His weight pinned her to the forest floor and she was pulled forcibly back to her mother's dire encounter back at the Carter residence. At least he's not strangling me, she thought.

He leaned backwards off of her and she could finally breathe again. They were both silent for a beat, sitting together among spindling trees. Then Mike caught Chloe's eye, a smile breaking across his face, and his anger sparked hot and followed. Though they weren't inches apart anymore, she still felt in danger of burning.

"I'm not my mother," she whispered, even though she was unsure of the reason. "I'm not—I'm not her..."

Chloe trailed off. Mike stared at her, confusion painted in great detail on his usually indifferent  face. He wasn't quite smiling anymore. She swallowed. The teen had yet to figure out what exactly allowed him past her perfectly constructed walls with so little resistance. Why was it so easy for him to reduce her to an insipid puddle of nothing?

"I get it now...you're doing all of this because of some stupid high school vendetta you have against her."

Mike opened his mouth, the objection he was about to make evident. "You think—"

"Do you know how many people are hurt?" She almost didn't say the rest, "Thanks to you?"

His mouth snapped shut. Chloe could almost hear his teeth clicking together. She was treading in dangerous water, but forced her head above anyway. "We're not her! Halle's not her! Blue is NOT HER!"

Mike's stare was cold, unforgiving. Chloe soldiered on. "You're only hurting us to get back at her for something she probably doesn't even know she did." She said, her heart heavy.

Mike looked as though he could tear the organ from her chest and leave it for the birds without a single second thought. "She knows exactly what she did! What she's still doing!" He spat and stood, yanking her with him. "You need to know how to stay in a child's place! What me and your mom have going on don't have shit to do with you!" He dragged her towards the car.

Chloe stumbled over fallen twigs and ill-placed rocks. "Oh so now I'm a child? You just decided that right now?"

"Yup," the man opened the back door, throwing the girl inside before heading to the driver's seat.

Fighting to open the back door as Mike entered the front seat, Chloe stumbled out from the back of the car awkwardly and ran. Knowing her chances of escaping were slim, her breathing became panicked and she stumbled as she heard heavy footsteps closing in quickly behind her. She sucked in a sharp breath as Mike wrapped his arms tightly around her waist and dragged her kicking and screaming back to the car.

He opened the trunk this time and threw her in roughly, so hard she hit the back of her head and before she could shake off the daze, her hands had been tied tightly behind her back with strong rope. Her shoulders strained painfully as each hand gripped an elbow and more rope was wound round to keep them in place. She groaned quietly.

"Mike...please..." she choked as sobs began to wrack her body and she leaned her head back helplessly. Mike pulled back after tightening the restraints on the teenager's wrists, and looked down at her. Through dazed eyes, Chloe thought she saw a glimmer of tenderness. Seeing that she had tugged on the man's heart, she was about to plead with him again when a layer of thick duct tape was placed firmly over her lips. Mike's eyes now glistened as he looked down at his teenage prisoner and grinned. Tying her ankles just as tightly as her arms, he stood back to admire his handy work, relishing the youth's tear stained cheeks, tearful eyes and her chest rising and falling quickly as she struggled to breath under the gag.

Chloe forced out a frustrated sob from behind her gag and Mike leapt forward, fisted a firm hand in her hair and brought the girl's head up to meet his face, so close she could feel the man's breath on her cheeks. "You don't have much to say now do you?"

She whined as the hand gripped tighter, tears stinging in her eyes.

"Hm? Nothing smart to say?" Mike fumed.

Chloe whimpered desperately into the duct tape as she tugged and pulled at her restraints.

Mike looked down at her, grinning as he watched her struggle. "Sit back we've got a long drive." She heard him say.

The teenager's breathing became erratic as she frantically shook her head. She couldn't be locked in a trunk. She imagined that it'd be worse than the closet.

"You should calm down. If you're a good girl I'll let you ride up front. I know how you are with stuff like this." He smirked and released Chloe's hair with a force that threw her head back, causing her to shake off yet another daze. When she came to, Mike had his hand on the door of the trunk slowly lowering it. "No! No!" She Screamed with frustration into the gag as she thrashed, bucking her hips into the air, desperate to get out. She twisted in her ropes, shook her shoulders from side to side trying to get some leverage in her arms. It was pointless, Mike had restrained her carefully enough to make sure that couldn't happen. Even her ankles felt like they were set in cement. Tired from struggling, her body flopped against the floor of the trunk, and after a few minutes she went completely still.

Mike stared down at Chloe, turning his head to the side when he realized she had finally given up. "You done?"

Chloe closed her eyes and nodded. Almost immediately Mike lifted her from the trunk and sat her in the passenger seat, quickly pulling the seatbelt across her chest and buckling her in to keep her still and safe. The man pulled it tight making her wince, and then carefully removed the tape from her mouth. Chloe immediately sucked in gulps of air and looked up at Mike with relief in her eyes. The man didn't care, he slammed her door shut and walked around the front of the vehicle, sliding into the driver's seat. Chloe bucked her hips up against the seatbelt, sobbing in frustration upon realizing she had been further restrained.

"Keep still. You not going anywhere."

"No, no I..." Chloe began to protest, panic fluttering in her stomach.

"Quiet...so sick of you running off at the mouth," Mike snarled, glaring into her eyes as he fisted a strong hand in her hair.

"Please, it hurts." She whimpered softly, closing her eyes as the stinging tears reformed.

"I want you...to be a good girl...and do as I say. Right now I want you to sit tight. All we're doing is going to the store and you making it something it doesn't have to be. You don't wanna go back in the trunk do you?"

Chloe didn't answer.

Mike sighed and fisted his hand tighter making Chloe cry out in pain. "Do you?" He growled. "It's a yes or no!"

"No!" Chloe screamed, bound hands going up to remove her hair from the man's hand.

Mike allowed it. "Alright then." He settled down. The car was silent. The only sounds being emitted were the hurried breaths from Chloe. She was filled with dread, which only escaping the confinement of the car and this man's presence could allay. She watched as the man tightened his hands on the steering wheel and rested his forehead against it. "Fuck! Why do you make me do shit like that?"

After a moment or two he looked over at her. She was so beautiful, he couldn't pinpoint why he was doing any of this. He just knew that he wanted his perfect family and that feeling took control of all his senses, heightened to a magnitude that was indescribably painful. He reached for his pocket and pulled something from it. Chloe heard the sound of a chain rattling in his hand as he held something up in front of her face. As her vision corrected, she focused on what was a silver necklace that had a heart-shaped locket dangling from it. She quickly recognized it as the necklace she had gifted her mother on their first Mother's Day spent together. She let out a panicked gasp and tried to pull it away from Mike's hand, only succeeding in making him grip even tighter, pulling another broken sob from Chloe's lips.

He wound the necklace around his hand and watched Chloe's eyes as they followed it back into his pocket. "I'll give it to you if you be good."

Chloe nodded, closed her eyes, and sobbed, hanging her head forward. Mike put a finger under her chin and tilted her head up, forcing her to look at him. To Chloe's shock, he spoke softly. "You've always been good Chloe. It shouldn't be hard for you. Just behave and everything will be fine. You'll be okay. This is the way things have to be for right now..."

He let go of Chloe's chin and watched sadly as tears began to fall from her eyes again. Wracked with guilt, he started the engine. Chloe laid her head back on the seat and let the silent tears slide down her cheeks, trying her best to keep herself quiet.

——–——————————

Chloe noticed that the gas station looked run down. The flashing neon sign and even some of the lights flickered on and off. The entire place looked incredibly old and, even if the lights were somewhat on, a part of her wondered if there was anybody actually working there.

"What?" Mike looked at Chloe then followed her line of vision toward the small run down building. The lights inside were on and from his point of view he could see a slumped over figure through a dirty window. "Might not look like much but this place always has everything I need...never have to go too far out for nothing." He said as he untied her wrists.

The fifteen year old flexed her hands trying to get some feeling in them and reached up to pull the sunshade down, opening the mirror to check out her hair and face. She frowned seeing the redness and puffiness of her left cheek but luckily there were no scratches or welts.

Mike stared at her blankly. "Who you trynna look cute for? People rarely come here."

The teen felt her heart lurch at that. "Just making sure I don't have to cover nothing up."

Mike shook his head. "You ain't gonna find no boyfriend this deep in the trenches." He adjusted his leather jacket on his shoulders and stuck his gun in the pocket of his denim jeans.

She felt her cheeks burn and she was happy for the cover of night. She knew she should concentrate on the plan for getting help, but her mind was all over the place.

Somethings gonna go wrong.

Just get some help. Alert the clerk...get help.

What if...what if they don't believe me?

Fuck it...just try.

Try.

"When we get inside don't look at nobody. Don't talk to nobody. If you try anything stupid I swear to you that'll be the last thing you fucking do." Mike leaned over towards the passenger seat where Chloe sat stock still afraid to move an inch. "I'll blow you and whoever the hell else in there head clean off your fucking shoulders. You got it?" He growled, baring his teeth at her.

She witnessed the certainty gleaming from his pores, hot and sweaty as if he was waiting for a retort just so he can spring and hurt someone. The teen shivered, staring into his animalistic gaze, wondering how someone could say things like that so casually to another person. She felt her throat close up and the familiar sting of tears. She couldn't bring herself to even think those words let alone let them form and leave her mouth. The teen blinked rapidly to try and keep herself from crying. She didn't want to wipe her face and alert him to the fact that she and her soul were weeping.

"You got it?" Mike gruffed out.

No. Was her initial thought but she otherwise swallowed hard. Pushing down her human urge to escape. To break free. "I got it." She insisted, though she wasn't sure if she was trying to convince him or herself.

He sighed.

She knew that sigh. It meant he didn't believe her.

"I-I'm serious." Chloe sat up straighter attempting to prove to the burly man that she would indeed listen. She'd be obedient. She'd become a tree so rooted in place and one with the soil that she too would only speak through the sounds of the wind. "I got it, Mike," the name burned deep within.

He didn't argue with her, but he didn't remain quiet either. "Don't fuck nothing up." The man said just before he cut the running engine and placed his hand on the door. "I'll get out first," his eyes bore into hers ready for any pushback. She held her breath peering over to her left to let him know he had her undivided attention. "Then you'll get out after I get out. I don't want you doing something stupid...like trynna run off."

Chloe nodded her understanding. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears. Her pulse beat three times its normal rate.

Get help.

The fifteen year old watched as the six foot 3 man exited the vehicle. As soon as he was gone she let out a breath that brought heat to her chest.

Run.

You can make it before he gets to this side.

You're faster than him.

RUN!

Right now!

Go!

Her nostrils flared as she tried to calm herself. There was a sharp dull pain in her thigh as she pinched at a newly crusted over scab.

Get it together.

She breathed hard through her nostrils and bit the inside of her right cheek.

Think straight. Okay? You're out...just get help.

Her chestnut eyes followed his slow gait as he rounded the back of the vehicle. She noticed his thick dry fingers on the window before her gaze trailed up to his face as he stared at her curiously.

"Hurry up. Fuck is you sitting there for?" He snatched the door open awaiting her inevitable exit.

"Sorry." She didn't really mean it, but it was what the man needed to hear. Red-faced in anger, Mike approached her, having been on his last straw.

"I-I'll get out." She swallowed but her body refused to move.

Anytime she was around this man it was as if her brain went on vacation leaving her nothing but an empty carcass to make executive decisions. Her leg twitched, announcing its want to move, but she couldn't bring herself to do any of the heavy lifting.

"You think I'm playing? I'm a joke?" The escaped convict roughly pulled the girl from her seat but her safety belt caught tight around her throat as he held her by her right forearm.

"Ow! OkayOkayOkay" she quickly felt around for the release button with her left hand pressing it just in time before her circulation was completely cut off. With a rough grunt Chloe fell to the ground on her hands and knees. She drew in a much needed breath before being pulled to a stand and pushed back into the side of the car.

"I told you no bullshit!" He muttered way too close to her ear.

The girl felt spittle on the side of her face. "I know" she whimpered while clutching at his hand that had a hold on her hair. "I know. I'm sorry my-my legs are still kind of numb from being in that closet for so long and you didn't say I could take the rope from my feet. I'm sorry." She rushed out her apology.

Mike huffed and knelt down to untie her ankles. "Well whose fault is that?" He shoved her and worked slowly at the knots. "Stop squirming!" He said, swatting her thigh with his hand, stopping any more movement. Finally freeing her, he pulled her from the ground, helping her to steady herself before gripping her arm tightly. "I'm warning you...don't try anything. If you run, I'll find you, you can't hide from me. And just remember you have two little sisters that'll suffer the consequences if you do anything stupid."

Chloe straightened her shirt and wiped away an unruly tear. "Okay."

"This is your final warning...Don't. Test. Me." He nudged her forward towards the store.

A slight nod was her only response as she walked wondering despairingly to herself how she would ever escape this nightmare. Although Mike stayed insanely close behind her she had enough room to potentially run if she crossed him hard enough.

Take it slow Chloe.

One step at a time.

No...no running. Be patient.

No sudden movements. He'll know.

Running was always her means to escape. Feeling the wind blow through her locs and the steady rhythm of her feet hitting hard pavement gave her a sense of freedom. Who knows, maybe If she ran far enough she'd outrun her brutal past.

Right foot.

Breathe.

Left foot.

Breathe.

Right foot.

Soon, the duo reached the front door of the convenience store. Chloe reached her hand out to open the dirty metal entryway but it was smacked down by a heavy hand. The fifteen year old peered to her right where her assailant stood smiling a sinister smirk.

"After you."  Mike whispered his silent threat as he pulled the door open causing a loud Ding Dong to announce their arrival.

They entered the small building and the place smelled old, reminding Chloe of certain thrift shops or the old abandoned houses she had been curious to explore with her sister when they were younger. It was damaged too, the ceiling was stained from leaks, a few tiles were missing from the floor, and a poorly fixed hole in one of the back walls. Honestly, she could understand why the place didn't have a lot of customers; a lot of people didn't really like coming to places like this.

Especially at night.

Mike didn't necessarily care, as long as he got gas and food and didn't have to worry about many eyes being on him.

They walked in sync. Chloe just a few inches ahead of him. She fiddled with her thumbs as she perused the run down stop and shop.

Where's the clerk?

Whose running this fucked up place?!

The place, ratty as it may be, did have a nice assortment of snacks, and actual food, which was great in Chloe's book. Briefly she thought about Blue and Halle and how they'd go running around every store their mother took them to gleaming and squealing about something they just "had to have" they'd simply die without it.

That seemed a lifetime ago.

Chloe shook the homesick thoughts away before it made her wretch. It was then she noticed that there was one other person in the gas station besides herself and Mike, an employee who was sleeping with his sandal-clad feet on the counter next to a small television playing something that sounded like wrestling.

Yes!

"Get whatever you want" Mike called over his shoulder as he grabbed a few snacks on the way to the refrigerated beer selection. Her jaw clenched as she watched him browse the store as if this was just a regular late night store run. She could feel her nails digging into her palms as she kept her head down and nodded. On autopilot, she went down the snack aisle and grabbed two bags of gummy worms for Blue. She continued but stopped soon after grabbing two packs of Oreos for Halle. Thinking better, she placed the Oreos back, replacing them with a family sized tray. She wanted some too. What would my mom like? She doesn't eat a lot of stuff. Chloe huffed, traversing up and down the snack aisle like this was her biggest life decision. She stopped in front of the plain Lays, grabbing the biggest bag they had. That ought to do. We won't be staying there for long anyhow, she thought.

The girl glanced up after hearing a loud huff coming from Mike's direction.

"They out of Corona's" he complained. From the sound of his voice, he had turned to fully look at her.

Ehhkay? She wanted to say but instead she kept quiet and gave a fake 'you can't be serious' expression. With as much grace that she could muster, Chloe wandered to the dry foods aisle and took a chance looking up at the employee who was lounging and definitely sleeping. Shit she thought.

Notice me.

Wake up!

She knew that her face would be plastered over every news channel at this point. A person as big as Beyoncé doesn't just vanish without anyone noticing. He had to recognize her. He just had to.

The sleeping employee had messy black hair, tan skin, and a tiny red scar under his left eye. His face was round and his nose was slightly up-turned and accessorized with a silver hoop. Chocolate was smeared over one of his cheeks and his mouth hung open as he slept peacefully. Mama said get somebody's attention. She said be real loud. Don't be scared.

Be real loud.

Don't be scared.

Be REAL loud.

Step by step, quiet as a mouse, Chloe felt herself getting closer to the checkout counter.

Heart thumping...

Throat dry...

Hands shaking...

Now that she was closer, she could hear light snoring. The clerk wore a black shirt that was obviously part of the uniform, but there was no name tag on his chest.

"What are you doing?" Chloe felt hot air on the back of her neck and the stinging cold of metal being pushed into her back.

"I-I was just sitting this stuff down so I can grab more." She couldn't believe her lie came out so smoothly, but she was grateful.

"Bitch don't play with me in this store. You hear me?" Mike whispered. The pressure of his squeezing fingers caused her breath to hitch in an audible gasp and her back to arch, pressing the gun deeper into her spine.

Chloe gave him a nod and Mike answered with a push. "Give me the stuff." He kept his voice low.

She listened, placing the snacks into the man's awaiting arms.

"Go get the other stuff. Make it quick. I'm talking under two minutes." He ordered.

In seconds Chloe went down the aisles grabbing necessities. Bread, peanut butter, jelly. She didn't even have time to read labels to make sure they were vegan friendly, but she didn't care. As long as her mother and her sisters had something in their stomachs. She ran to the frozen food section and snatched a big bag of hash browns for Halle then a bag of chicken nuggets for Blue which made her queasy. She hated even touching things that were made from an animal.

"You done?" Mike asked when she returned with her arms full, groceries nearly toppling over.

She handed him the bulk of her load. "One second," She said.

Mike regarded her with curious eyes, but obliged. He watched her shuffle to the dry food aisle again, picking up a box of spaghetti noodles and two jars of pasta sauce. The man eyed her closely as she went to pick up a random assortment of vegetables. "Done." She announced quietly to her captor who answered with a curt nod.

Chloe walked down to the front of the store with Mike's hand gripping the back of her neck. Apprehensively, she turned the box of pasta over and over in her hands until she felt the confidence she needed to exude. She thought of her mother and the pain that she was put in because of the man behind her, and that was all that she needed.

How is this guy still sleeping? She wondered once she reached the counter. He could've been robbed three times over by now. The teen sighed, placing her items down and reaching over poking the sleeping person until they mumbled groggily, their face twitching and mouth closing as they squirmed in their stool. Chloe wondered if this was how she looked to most people in the mornings; succumbed to oblivion and so carefree. She continued to poke the employee until his eyes twitched open and closed. A yawn escaped from his lips but he wouldn't budge.

"Aye!" Mike yelled. He would've taken off with the items long ago, but he needed gas and a place as old as this didn't have a pay at pump option, plus he only had cash.

The cashier looked like he couldn't be any older than sixteen or seventeen. He blinked up at Mike hazily, still half asleep. "Are you like... an actual customer? Cause I haven't had anyone come in here all night. Well, I dunno if anyone came in while I was sleeping. Probably not." He shrugged carelessly. Even if his eyes were only half open and drooping like they'd close again at any point, Mike started talking anyway. "I need forty on pump three."

Chloe expected the guy to jump up from his laid back position, but he slowly swung his feet off of the counter as loud cheering from the tiny television resounded around the place. His eyes opened a little bit more, enough for the girl to tell they were blue and for Mike to see that the gas station worker was looking directly at his leather jacket.

"Hey man," The probable teen said in a sleepy sounding voice that fit his image. "That jacket's dope." The teen seemed to wake up more and more with each word he spoke and it was clear that he was excited at the fact someone else was at the gas station besides him. "Been trying to find something like it but can't get my hands on nothing authentic. I want that true vintage vibe ya know?" The worker smiled large enough for his gums to peek past his lips. Chloe stared at the floor, picking at her dirty and damaged jeans. They were made for fortress life and were not faring well on this humbling excursion.

Mike grimaced. "Forty on three." He slapped a hundred dollar bill on the counter. "And all of this." He said in a colder tone. His jacket was not that old. He huffed at the thought.

The employee eyed the man for his rude tone. "You want a bag?"

"Fuck am I gonna do carry all the shit in my hand? Of course I want a bag man." Mike said simply.

Chloe and the boy exchanged glances. Her eyes lowered, and she pulled her hair to one side to reveal more of her face.

Recognize me. Please recognize me.

The girl tapped her finger on her thigh and her mouth moved as if she wanted to speak but before she could, Mike tightened his grip on her neck, not pressing too hard.

"Stop staring at my damn daughter and ring my shit up!" He snapped, causing Chloe to flinch.

"No one's staring at her geez dude." The boy insisted, offended by the implication. "Bring it down a notch. It's been a long night Ya know." He grabbed some of the groceries and began scanning with another yawn. "Man, I never should've picked up this shift from Melissa. This night shift is hell ya know what I'm saying?" He scanned item after item with no sense of urgency. "My mom says I gotta save for college but I think she knows I'm not going by no-

"Breaking News!" The TV blared "The search continues for Mega-Star Beyoncé and her three minor children Chloe, Halle, and the newly six year old Blue Ivy Carter. Officials have—

The cashier hurried to turn the television off. "Been blasting that nonsense for twenty four hours now." He rolled his eyes. "It's like we get it...no need to shove it down our throats. It's not like the public can do anything about it." He shrugged and went to scan his last item but there was an edge to his tone that made Mike uncomfortable. Chloe's dainty hands with their small, thin fingers trembled visibly as she wrung them together nervously.

"Could you!" She shouted. "Help me?" She asked, her voice quieter than before. "My mama is— she cut herself off and looked at Mike, his expression shifting from one of rage to a softer, more supportive one.

"Yeah uh," Mike scratched the back of his head with his left hand, right hand gripping the trigger to his gun a little too firmly. "My wife...her mama say she stuck somewhere around route 41. Say all she see is a scarecrow wearing a jumpsuit and a Freddy mask...like from the movie? You know anything about that?" He smashed the tip of his gun hard into Chloe's back, ensuring he left a bruise.

"Freddy mask?" The clerk furrowed his brows.

It was Mike's turn to shrug. "S'What she keep saying... I think she's just scared. You know how women get when they're in these situations. They go all haywire...start doing and saying anything. The man explained.

Chloe nodded faintly in agreement, doing her best not to allow her trembling hands to show too much.

"Riiight," the employee squinted. "Your total is $88.12."

"Damn," Mike scoffed.

"Inflation man, even the capitalist are starting to complain." The boy said, only half joking.

Chloe bit her tongue to keep anything else from spilling out as she watched the final transaction take place.

Please notice me. Please!

"Hurry up with my change." Mike barked. A faint, deep scratching sound could be heard directly across from him and he knew that Chloe was going crazy with scratching at her legs. It was something she'd always done.

Mama needs help.
Come on ComeOnComeOnnn
Mama needs help. Mama needs help.

"Can you help me," She asked again, her voice coming out shaky and small, but before the clerk could figure out what she was talking about, Mike grasped her arm. Almost immediately, she tried to shrug her arm free, but the grip only tightened. Chloe felt her blood boiling beneath her skin, and lifted her hand to fight back when the employee began to shoo them away.

"Hey! Whatever you guys have going on right now, please take it outside. I'm trying to have an uneventful night."

Suddenly Chloe's skin had taken on a reddish hue and Mike made sure that he matched. "Won't have no problems from us." His eyes bore into the girl's, shooting her an utterly intense look that sent a shiver down her spine. "You enjoy the rest of your night." Mike grabbed both bags from the counter and nudged Chloe towards the exit. She took in a deep, shaky breath, covering her fluster with a large gulp of spit. "I'm sorry I'm sorry." She whispered, pleading in desperation, panting heavily as the ding from the door gave an alert to their retreat.

"You about to be." Mike's gaze turned towards her with a sly expression.

The clerk watched them go, taking a moment to stare and scrutinize every detail of the retreating pair. He didn't take his eyes away as the man shoved the groceries then the girl in the car. He didn't blink as the man angrily muttered to himself all while pumping the gas and spewing obvious venom with his words. He looked on wordlessly as the engine to the car was started. He beheld their exodus silently as the car sped off down the road until he lost them at the bend.

"Fucking hate the night shi-"

Suddenly a clap of thunder was heard outside, causing the boy to jolt out of his stupefied gaze. The teenaged clerk looked around the store with an astonished but pleased expression. His lips parted slightly in a fond smile as he reached for his phone.

"Fuck it"

Seconds later, the device was held up in front of his face. He raised his brows in an attempt at using facial recognition to unlock it but received an error message. "Get one nose piercing and suddenly you're a new person," he muttered solemnly as his fingers went to his keypad and pressed the first number.

Nine

His fingers expertly slid across his screen.

One

He huffed before pressing two more numbers.

Two five.

After unlocking his phone, the boy immediately clicked on a tiny app with hues of pink, purple, and yellow. "My fans are not gonna believe this." He shook his head, all while following the prompt to start a live stream by way of Instagram. Sighing softly, he waited for his screen to load and made sure the live indicator had started.

"What's up guys, it's WildKyle coming at you live from you guessed it, AL's one stop shop...Again. Melissa you owe me for picking up this graveyard shift." He rolled his eyes before speaking again. "Now I haven't figured out if this place is haunted yet but I just had some pretty spooky shit happen like literally two seconds ago. You guys know how the news has been blasting every two seconds about the whole Bay-yoncè being disappeared thing? Well I think I just saw one of her kids like a minute ago casually SHOPPING at AL's like it was a regular day. Isn't that fucked up? Your mom's missing and you suddenly have a late night craving for Oreos dude? Shits messed up! Maybe this whole thing is a hoax ya know?" The boy watched as multiple comments appeared on his screen.

"I'm not lying. She was with the guy...umm Mike something. The crazy guy they say broke out of prison or whatever?" He stated, running his tattooed fingers through his hair. "I don't know which girl it was man. One of the older ones either Chloe or Hailey aren't they twins or something? How am I supposed to know?"

He squinted as one additional comment came into the chat. "I'm positive it was them. What? Oh they left going southbound down route 41. I'm gonna call the police mom." He wiped the chocolate from his cheek. "It's gone. Happy now?"

————————————————————

I cry at night 'cause my baby's too far to be by my side To wipe away these tears of mine, so I hold my pillow tight To imagine you would stretch your hand looking for mine 'Cause I'm lost in this dream, I need you to hold me

I'm scared of lonely

Tense.
          Stuck.
                Ossified.

Beyoncé sat in the middle of that God awful scraggy mattress so still one would think she was being measured for a casket in preparation for her own pathetic sorrowful burial. Her fingers were like stone, resting heavily in her lap. With one leg outstretched in front of her due to her restraints and the other hanging lifelessly over the edge of the bed, she held her breath. Waiting, waiting for another shriek, waiting for another agony filled wail. Any unnatural sign of life that would confirm her oldest child was okay. That she was still in the land of the living.

The woman's cheeks were flushed. She began to feel lightheaded as she continued to hold her breath. She was afraid that by taking even the smallest huff of air into her desperate lungs she     would be betraying one of the persons she loved most in this decrepit world. Her eyes were trained on the closed door just outside of her reach, neck stoic, posture as perfect as it's always been. She sat there for what felt like hours, unmoving. She started thinking about things. About how she never told Chloe exactly how much she meant to her and how she was the best daughter and best big sister that anyone could ever ask for. She remembered laying eyes on her in that warehouse for the first time – wincing at how terrified the teen was at the time – and she remembered when Chloe first told her she loved her and that she was happy and proud that she was her daughter. Bey's lip twitched at the memory, thinking of how much Chloe loved being a family.

Chloe was only fifteen but Bey had always felt like she was a million years older. She carried herself in a way her sisters could look up to. She was nice to people who didn't deserve kindness, she laughed too hard at stupid jokes, she put all of her love and faith and trust into the people closest to her. Bey had always been very observant of her household and she'd always taken note of how Chloe was by far the nicest of all of her children. She never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings, she never called anyone out on their shit, she always tried to be the most stable and constant member of their family despite everything she'd been through.

She wondered if she'd ever see her child again. She wondered if anyone would see her child again, but Bey didn't want to think about that.

What a thing to process.

She wanted to vomit at the thought of the emptiness that would conquer her soul and shatter her spirit if she never got another chance to feel the warmth of her child's embrace; the beating of her heart.

Chills.

Painfilled chills began at her toes and wormed their way to her ankles, inched its way up her thighs, crawled its way to her pelvis, settling deep in her stomach. The cold harsh chill shot through her chest and 'oh God' did it burn hot, hot as coal. But the fire didn't stop there; it slithered to her throat like a deadly poisonous snake, searing the muscles there like fresh pieces of meat on a too hot stove. She swallowed trying to rid herself of the tortuous heat, the twisting torridity, but that didn't work and the air got caught, compressing, strangling, constricting her breaths until her burdensome hands began to scratch ardently at her neck leaving thick crimson bruises in its wake.

She was choking and she felt like this would be the final ailment that would take her away from this familiar cruel cruel world. Some parts of her mind were thankful for the serenity of her last stertorous breath but the other was struggling. Waging an endless war between a crude life and a marvelous death. She was panicking so bad her eyes bulged significantly from her skull. With her nostrils flared and jaw clenched, no air passed through to her desperately pleading lungs. Her throat closed causing her trembling hands to naturally grab at her pulsating neck. In shock, the woman laid back on the bed, her head resting on the dirty pillow like a puffy cloud on a perfect day.

Silence.

A silence took over her body, breaths escaping in short spurts as she maintained a blank stare at the water stained ceiling. She could feel her entire body shaking now as voices began to crowd her restless mind. Voices she tried to quiet but they were so loud it was all she could hear. All she could feel.

"You mine."                         "You still such a tease."

                 "Stay still...Don't move"

                                
"We're a family."              "You not going anywhere."

Her chest beat faster and faster. An unsteady thump thump. She writhed on the mattress begging begging begging for the voices to leave so her brain could send signals to her chest willing it to slow down before she actually slipped into cardiac arrest.

"Were you happy without me mommy?"

That was a different voice. A voice that made her curl into a ball, little whimpers escaping her throat as she desperately clutched her chest. She spent most of her time trying to dry her eyes, only for the tears to come back tenfold.

"Why won't you get up baby?" She could hear her mother's voice calling out to her. Her face turned grim, mouth pursing as the frown lines in her forehead came out even more. She cast her gaze towards the door, still unmoving, still shaking, still wiping at her salty tears.

"JuJu! Why you still laying there? Getcho tail out of that bed NOW!" Tina's voice echoed in her head.

Seconds passed without any sound or movement. The silence that hung in the dimly lit bedroom felt heavy, almost ominous.

"GET UP!"

More silence followed

Stillness.
        Reticence.
                Saturinity.

A loud gasp escaped her lips and her eyes widened slowly as she looked around, coughing until she could pull oxygen properly through her nose. Abruptly, Bey sat up, chest aching and fingers clenching at the worn sheets. She managed to pull herself to the foot of the bed and yanked at the chain that crushed her ankle the more she savagely tugged, pulled, and madly jerked at the stupid fucking restraints. "Uggghhhhh!!" She screamed in frustration when it didn't budge. It took a while for the blonde haired woman to calm her breathing. She glared daggers at her ankle and the restraint, allowing herself a moment to calm her nerves and anger. With a soft thud, she let her head hang back against the headboard and closed her eyes. The smell of the room was driving her insane. The woman shook her head, trying to escape the scent even though she knew it was futile. This room had the smell of her captor rubbed over every surface. It assaulted her sensitive nose and stuck to her skin.

A muffled grunt escaped from her throat as she tugged at the chains. That damnable fucking chain that rendered her completely useless protested loudly, rubbing against the wooden foot of the bed. She released a flustered snarl and jerked at it again. She absolutely hated that chain, almost as much as the abhorring smell. With a strong jerk of her body, Bey pulled as hard as she could, jostling the chains as hard and as far as she could. Somehow it gave her room to spare, so the woman curled up slightly, pulled up her knees as far as the chain on her foot allowed her to and then pushed herself up. She was now standing on top of the bed. In the back of her mind Beyoncé thanked God that she was as limber as she was, twisting and turning so she could get a better view of where she was pulling, how she was pulling and even jerking the chains in different ways from different angles. The rattling was loud to her ears and gave her a slight headache, which only served to anger her further which in turn made her fight even harder. At some point there was no real strategy that she followed and she just randomly flailed her limbs, trying the strength of the chains. "Come on!" She grunted, still pulling and twisting. "Come on," she practically begged this time.

Bey felt a tiny poke on her waist and nearly slapped herself in the face after realizing she had stashed those utensils there earlier. So much was going on and her mind was all over the place. She couldn't remember everything. She could never remember anything. Without another thought, Bey reached inside her pants pulling out the crumpled tissue that held probably her only means of escape. First she tried the peeling knife, sticking the small two pronged end into the lock, but that didn't fit. "Fuck!" She threw it across the room, frowning to herself as it hit that wall. Next she tried the callus remover. Just by eyeballing the tool she knew it wouldn't be of any use to her. Pretty soon the callus remover was across the room, almost under the bathroom door. Sighing, the blonde reached for her last utensil. "Please God l-let this work." She whispered. With a gulp, she gripped the tiny stainless steel pointed nail file in her trembling hands. "Please please please." She whispered, her brows coming together in the middle of her forehead to showcase her concentration. With ease the tool slipped into the hole at the bottom of the lock. The woman didn't want to celebrate too prematurely so she remained quiet as she began turning the nail file to the left. Immediately the flimsy tool snapped in half, leaving one pointed tip inside of the lock and the rounded end inside of her calloused hand.

Her world came to an earth-shattering halt.

She had failed.

The woman fell deathly silent. Her hazel eyes were wide with shock and her heart was slamming in her chest. Tears of frustration were welling up in the woman's eyes as she let the remaining piece of the nail file drop to the bed, taking with it her dreams of ever escaping this everlasting hell. She stared at the door, her gaze turning frantically crazed. If only she could reach it. She thought. If only she could touch the doorknob. She remained quiet, biting her tongue to prevent herself from making any amount of noise. She sat, twiddling her fingers, looking left and right, then right to left appearing frantically militant.

"Lay back." The blonde shook mercilessly as she violently threw herself against the headboard upon hearing the gruff phantom sound of the voice she hated so much. She could almost physically feel Mike running his hand over her skin, setting it aflame as she did her best to make herself smaller.

"No." She whimpered to herself with a firm shake of her head. "Mm-mm" snot ran freely down her face.

With a long winded groan she closed her eyes, willing herself to calm down even though her heart was beating hysterically in her chest and the voices blared louder.

"Is there anything else you need to tell mama, Giselle?" Bey heard, and knew it was her mother's concerned voice. She was the only one who called her by her middle name. A sob rumbled deep in her chest as she bit at her lip.

"So much mama," the woman whispered, allowing but one tear to fall. "So much." She shook her head in disgust and fear. Her arms wrapped around her body as if it were the only thing anchoring her to this dying planet. She began rocking side to side, willing the deep seated urge to scream away.

"Did that boy do anything else?" Tina's southern drawl blared loudly in her ears. "Did he?"

Again Bey shook her head as her nails dug deep into her forearms. The tears were impossible to stop now. "No." She whispered to herself. "Nothing happ-"

All of her thoughts were cut short when she thought about just this morning when she awoke to her captor kissing the skin beneath her bellybutton, scraping the already bruised area with his scraggly beard.

"Mmmmm" she wiped at the snot and rocked herself harder than ever before. "Nothing happened." She felt a sharp pain in her chest at the blatant lie.

"WAaAaaah!" The gut wrenching cry from before, the cry of a newborn filled the room and Bey fully busted into tears, covering her ears. Not again.

Her throat was closed tight, the stress helping her forget that she could breathe through her nose as well as her mouth. It made her vision swim whenever her lungs screamed for oxygen, demanding that she attempted to inhale the thick, cramped air. It reminded her of that day in the bathroom all those years ago but also the night Mike broke into her home. The air was heavy and disgusting on those days too. Memories of her children screaming in terror, her heart crumbling, her life shattering before her eyes was all she could think about. It left a bitter, repugnant taste in her mouth. The terror and disdain she remembered in Chloe's eyes as she turned away from her computer only to be met with the crazed kidnapper's hard glare was enough to make Bey's heart throb with pain.

"Were you happy without me mommy?" She heard a tiny voice ask.

Bey made a slightly panicked noise and pressed her palms harder into her skull.

"Were you happy without me mommy?" She heard again.

The woman's brain struggled to catch up with her, working slower than normal. "SHUT UP!" She screamed, rocking back and forth, eyes squeezed shut.

"Were you happy without me mommy?" It was all she could hear.

Beyoncé shook her head again, this time firmer, and made herself even smaller if that were physically possible. A loud sound of protest wrenched from her throat. "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" She screamed into the empty room.

It felt like someone was torturing her - eternity spent under a pitiless curse - as she waited for the voice to leave her be. Her thoughts drove her to a supine position. She could still hear the infant's wails. Every fiber of her being screamed to find the baby and comfort it -she was just a baby - but Bey knew it was a sick ploy from her own demented mind.

Beyoncé did not know how long it was before the wails stopped, but she was grateful that it had. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands until she saw little stars and sighed, quickly realizing that the ending of the baby's crying only made hers louder in the otherwise quiet room. "God p-please get me out of h-here. Pleeease! Pleeease!" She practically whined.

But there was another whine that didn't belong to her.

It was crying again.

It seemed the newborn always cried when she couldn't, it's hollow and despairing wail echoing off the walls and ceilings. Bey's eyes widened and she pulled the thick blanket up to her pale lips, shivering from both the shattering noise and the ever-present frigidness of her own sweat. She waited several minutes for the sound to cease, shuddering beneath the sheets in her oversized  cotton sweater. At one point she thought she heard the noise stop again, but when she moved the cover from her face an inch she could hear the cries clear as day. As a torrent of chills raced down Bey's spine, she prayed for the wailing to go away. Oh please let it stop!

The infant continued to moan, though growing louder and louder with every passing second. Tremoring, the blonde sat up in the bed, clutching onto the covers until her frail knuckles turned white. "What do you w-want from me?" She screamed, eyes gazing around the room as if she could possibly lay eyes on the bothered newborn. "Huh? Wh-what do you want?!" She yelped.

The cry now turned into a high-pitched shriek, reverberating throughout the room with unusual force. Beyoncé shook her head rapidly. "I don't kn-know what you w-want!" She exclaimed, running her hands up her thighs restlessly. The screaming continued to ring almost painfully in her ears. Her twisted lips turned into a terrifying grimace. "Be q-quiet baby!" She snarled. "H-Hush!"

"Please God," the woman cried. "P-Please make the n-noise go a-away!"

The orchestra of the howling infant and the blonde's own anguished pleas grated at her until her frigid body shook with insane fury. Taking one shaking limb, Bey slammed her hand down on the mattress with all of her might. "Be quiet!" Breathing heavily, she pushed herself back on the bed as far as her chain would allow and listened. The blaring cries of the infant grew fainter with each passing second, before soon fading to nothingness. It's over the blonde thought. She briefly closed her eyes and gave a silent hallelujah.

After a moment of the welcomed silence, Bey felt like she could properly breathe. She took in a long-winded inhale and rubbed her face, exhaling forcibly in frustration soon after, feeling somewhat accomplished. The wailing suddenly began from the side of her again, causing her to cringe. Only it was worse, so much worse. It shouldn't have come as such a shock. Her stomach really shouldn't have coiled like that. And yet her jaw dropped. Whirling her head around, eyes bucked, nose scrunched, she began to pull at her roots. "It h-happened okay?" She hissed. "Is that wh-what you want to h-hear? I-It happened! It FUCKING H-HAPPENED!" She cried breathlessly. "It happened, it happened, it happened!" She was hysterical. "I did it!" Her facial features went from confusion to realization to concentration to anger to hurt and then full out crying in a matter of seconds. "I d-did it!" Bey was now wailing at the top of her lungs, crying trying to catch her breaths between those long sobs. "I-It happened! I-me-I-I did it! I did it!"

From the corner of her eye she could see the doorknob twist back and forth. She didn't care. She continued to be with her tears, repeating that mantra over and over and over as long as her professional singing lungs would allow. "I did it!" The woman shrieked. "It w-was me!" She cried. "I did it!" The doorknob twisted again and her heart lurched assuming it was Mike about to rush in and punish her for all the noise she was making. "I did iiit!" Snot gushed from her nose and still the woman didn't care. "I did it!" She squeezed her eyes shut as she heard the door creak open, signaling that someone was entering the room. "I did it. I did it!" She tossed and turned.

"Mommy?" A tiny shaky voice called out.

The blonde almost believed she imagined it, thus found it comforting to remain one with her tears. "I did it! It was m-me!" She was screaming it now.

"Mommy!" A different voice sounded, then a soft hand was placed on her shoulder.

Bey shook the hand away. "Please G-God I'm s-sorry!" She cried. "It w-was me! Forgive me!" Her eyes were closed and her hands were tucked tightly between her legs as she continued to toss and turn. "I did it, I did it, I did it!"

"MOMMY!" Two voices screamed at once. The whole room seemed to come to a still.

Bey craned her neck, turning around to finally lay eyes on her two youngest children. "I did it! I did it!" She couldn't pull herself out of this woeful misery. Blue's eyes were huge as she stared at her mother. The six year old clutched her injured hand close to her chest as her lip quivered. Watching her mother wail in pain like that brought tears to the young girl's eyes and she too joined the woman in bawling at the top of her lungs.

"Mommy he's gone," Halle tried her hand at comforting her mother. "I think he took Chloe."

Beyoncé's eyes didn't meet her children's faces, instead she looked beyond them shaking her head sadly. "I did it!" She whispered. "I did it, I did it." Her tears fell like rain.

"Mommy Mike took Chloe. I heard her screaming..." Halle said.

"I did it! I-I did it!" Beyoncé continued to sulk.

"Mommy, did you hear me? Did you hear what I said?" Seeing her mother wailing in so much agony, the thirteen year old couldn't help but to break out and cry. The person she loved most was in pain and she couldn't do anything about it. "Mommy, he took Chloe...what do we do? Mommy! What do we do?" She desperately needed direction. She needed someone to tell her what her next move should be.

"I did it!" Bey was in a catatonic state by now, staring unmoving at the door. "I did it. I-It was m-me. I'm so s-sorry."

Blue stamped her foot hard on the wooden floor, "mommy!" Her scream was filled with anger.

"I did it, I-I did it, it was m-me!"

Halle turned her head back and forth from her mother to her sister then back to her mom and couldn't figure out what was wrong. Something was obviously wrong besides the fact she was chained to the bed, but the teen couldn't figure out exactly what and it scared her to no end.

"Mommy talk to me," Halle muttered obscenities as she cried.

"I-I did it Lilbit, it was m-me! It was mommy!"

Sure enough, Halle's sobs became louder and louder as she tried to fight back the tears but they wouldn't seize and just like her mother, she too was howling at the top of her lungs. Blue groaned as she watched the scene unfold. Too malnourished to continue to cry out loud and not old enough to get away with cursing under her breath like Halle. She opted to just groan where she stood, as if it would make the weeping stop.

The six year old stepped closer to the bed and asked. "Mommy, why won't you tell us what's wrong?"

"The b-baby." Bey tried to get her hysterical sobs under control. She took deep breaths, trying to get control over her crying. "I-It wouldn't stop. It wouldn't stop. I-I did it." More crying followed as Halle rubbed her back trying to get her mom to calm down. "If she w-would've just sh-shut up! Stopped c-crying! I-I wouldn't h-have done it."

Blue looked at Halle, puzzled. After sharing a look of confusion, she went back to her mother. "Mommy you're scaring me."

"Oh my God!" The blonde wept into her hands. "I-I did it. I can't...I can't."

Halle rubbed her back again. "Mommy you didn't do anything. You're not making sense."

Bey feverishly nodded her head up and down. "I did! I diiiid!" She didn't meet her child's worrisome eyes. "It h-happened! It happened!" She was becoming frantic. "It happened!" She repeated.

Blue took a rickety step back, shocked at her mother's lunatic behavior, but Halle took two tentative steps forward, climbing onto the bed and inching closer to her mother. "What! What happened! What's wrong?" She flung her arms around the woman in a protective manner and hugged her. "What happened mama?"

"I did it!" Was all the woman could say.

Blue watched as her sister comforted her mother and a tear ran down her cheek. She may not have understood what was going on but she understood enough to know that her mother needed her and she wanted to comfort her as well. She stepped forward and climbed on the bed, same as her big sister. "What did you do?" The child reached with her left hand and pulled one of Bey's wrist from her hidden face. Hazel met brown probably for the first time since they entered the room. There was a beat of silence, one where Blue and Bey simply stared at one another, eyes moving remarkably fast, both searching for answers no one knew. "Mommy," Blue choked out, the word falling from her mouth mirroring defeat. All the child wanted to do was escape and with her mother acting like this she was starting to believe that leaving was closer to impossible than she initially thought.

Beyoncé rubbed the six year old's cheek, ridding the child of her tears. "Baba, I d-did it. Mommy did it." She pulled the girl into her chest, stroking her head lovingly.

Halle grew quiet seeing that the woman's loud crying had stopped. She didn't know what started it or what stopped it but now it was quiet. The teen glanced over to her mother and sister and saw they were quietly stuck together in a hug. Halle realized quickly that she too wanted to be comforted and hurriedly crawled over to them. They opened up and allowed her to enter into their warm embrace.

They sat there.

Together in one another's arms.

Not speaking, yet hearing every word unsaid.

Their voices hadn't broken the silence, yet words filled the stuffy air around them, keeping them close.

As if on cue, they all pulled away. "What's wrong mommy?" Blue was the first to speak, pushing a strand of her mother's hair from her face.

Bey didn't answer this time.

It was Halle's turn to speak. "Mommy we gotta get out of here we gotta get help. He took Chloe and I don't know what he did to her because she was screaming!"

Beyoncé closed her eyes, breathing slowly through her mouth. Old memories of her and Chloe filled her mind. Chloe always made her laugh, made her smile. The teen was always wary about letting people in but oh when Bey finally got to see her personality glow, feel the warmth from her daughter's soul, the feeling was indescribable.

Blue moved to the side of her mother while Halle crawled into her lap, resting her hands on her shoulders. "Did you hear her screaming mommy? It didn't sound good. Where did he say he was taking her? The store? Because he tried to get us to go first. Is that where he took her? He took her to the store? Do you know? Did he say anything?"

Bey looked at Halle like she didn't recognize her and began grabbing at the teen's hands. Her body was truly in a lot of pain and the added weight to her legs made the chain dig uncomfortably into her ankle.

"What if he's hurting Chloe mommy?" Halle went on, pulling away from her mother's touch only to bring herself closer. "What if he doesn't bring her back? What do we do?" Tears poured violently down and a cry bubbled inside of her. "He took my sister!"

Beyoncé continued to stare off into a dark abyss that only her eyes could see; only her body could feel. Halle grew even more impatient. "Why aren't you talking mama? Mommy! MAMA what do you want me to do?" Halle shook her mom's shoulders with all of her might. "What should I do? Mommy please we need to decide now before he gets back." The woman simply bit at her lip and her leg twitched uncontrollably. "Ugh! You act just like Chloe with that! Why do y'all do that just answer me! Answer me mommy! Answer me!" She was gripping too hard at the woman's shoulder causing her nails to slightly dig in but at this point the blonde was numb.

No feelings.

My baby's gone.

"Stop!" Blue tried to intervene but Halle still carried on like a spoiled child in a store.

"Why aren't you answering me!" She screamed in frustration. Anger clearly etched into her features.

Bey couldn't take it anymore. She felt like she was being smothered and there was no way out of it. "GET OFF!" She roared like a lion protecting its pride and pushed Halle with newfound strength. The girl landed harshly on the floor with a loud thud. Tears were in her eyes as she regarded her mother like she would a monster.

"Mommy!" Blue screeched at the sight of her sister on the wooden floorboards.

"Y-you NEVER l-listen!" Bey screamed, pointing her finger angrily in Halle's direction. "EVER!" She added, causing Blue to flinch away from her.

"You— Suddenly Bey's hand cupped her mouth in what one could only describe as shock. Pure and utter shock. "I-I'm so sorry!" She said to a cowering Halle then looked at Blue who was crawling off of the bed to get away from her. "I'm sorry. I-I'm just stressed. Mommy didn't mean to hurt you." The woman cringed at how much she sounded like her abuser but she went on. "Mommy r-really didn't m-mean it LilBit. I-it's just s-sometimes you c-crowd mommy's space a-and I'm in a lot of p-pain right n—there's no ex—excuse I-I know but I-I-I—do you think you c-can help mommy get out? Hm? Y-you think you can get this chain off?"

Tears were being shed.

Someone was being hurt.

Bey felt faint.

"Can you h-help mommy?" She begged, clasping her hands in front of her in prayer. "I'm s-sorry baby. C-can you help your mommy? Please?"

Never had she felt as hopeless and dead as she did at this very moment. It was like she was watching herself from outside her body. Watching as her life was destroyed and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Halle was speechless for a moment, and then, "you promised." Her face contorted into a reflection of betrayal as she stared into the eyes of an apologetic Bey. "Y-you promised to never lay a hand on us." The thirteen year old continued to back away from her mother afraid of another outburst.

Bey took a deep breath as she struggled to keep consciousness. "I-I know baby, I just-"

"NO! YOU PROMISED!" Halle stood up all of a sudden pointing an accusatory finger at her mom.

Beyoncé looked at her sharply, but didn't challenge her. "Baby I-"

Halle narrowed her eyes,"You're just like him." She said coldly, and when Bey looked at her, confused, she went on as her mind bounced all over the place "you-"

"DON'T YOU DARE FIX YOUR MOUTH T-"

"NO! You don't get to te-"

"LISTEN!" Bey squeezed her eyes closed tight at the drumming migraine piercing through her brain. She made an attempt to breathe and soften her voice. "Lil bit, p-please help me out a-a-and we'll discuss this l-later okay? Just p-please?" The sad attempt at a smile wasn't lost on her youngest daughter who watched the scene in horror.

It was Halle's turn to stare off into space.

Blue stood there, shaky and unsure. "I'll help you mommy." She decided and made her way to the foot of the bed.

"Th-thank you baby," the woman found another smile from somewhere deep inside to give to her youngest before training her eyes on her middle child who hadn't moved an inch. "LilBit p-please." She begged. "I wanna g-get out."

Tears gushed from Halle's eyes and she shook her head slightly. "Why would you do that to me?" Her feelings were hurt more than anything. "Why would you do that?" Her voice cracked.

Bey reached out her hand to touch Halle's arm. The teen's breathing went quick and shallow and she pulled her hand away from the crying woman like she'd been burned. "Don't touch me!" She yelped and staggered slightly.

Blue came up beside her. "Are you alright?"

Halle looked down at her sister trying to find the right answer. She didn't want her sister to get worked up. She had to be the big sister in Chloe's absence.

"I...yes...I am," she said, trying to refocus herself.

Too many hours locked away. Too many hours without food. The stress of going cold turkey off of her medication. Of course she was having moments of...

"I'm s-sorry LilBit." Bey fiddled with the chain, pulling at it as she twisted her ankle. "Mommy's sorry o-okay? Can you h-help me get out? Please?"

Blue ran over to assist her mother. The little one hopped on the bed, kneeling as she pulled at the chain with just her left hand. It was then Beyoncé noticed that her daughter was favoring her dominant hand and never used her right. The woman let go of the restraint, leaving Blue tugging at the metal links by herself. "What's w-wrong with your hand BaBa?"

Blue and Halle exchanged looks.

"D-did you hurt y-yourself?" Bey reached for the hand in question but Blue flinched away.

"Can mommy s-see?" Circling thoughts of her getting out of the room were pushed aside in favor of her sulking child.

"Baba c-could y-you let m-mommy see? Please?"

Thumpthumpthumpthump-

Bey's heart skipped in its pounding beat at the moment Blue hesitantly turned her injured palm towards her, revealing red blisters.

"What happened?" She looked to Halle who wouldn't stop moving whether it was peeling the paint off of her fingernails, fiddling with the string of her sweatpants, or pacing back and forth. She refused to make eye contact, and the moment passed in relative silence.

Bey's throat clenched as she surveyed the rest of the damage. From the one raw patch by her thumb to her pink fingertips. Instinctively, Bey lightly kissed one of the blisters right before she spoke. "Did that m-man do this to y-you BaBa? H-He hurt you?" Her voice was pathetic when she asked.

Immediately Blue shook her head. "No."

Again Bey peered at Halle and with just that small glance the girl broke down, rambling a mile a minute. "I wasn't even gone five minutes! I told her to stay in the room until I got back! She was only supposed to distract him while I tried to get Chloe out! How was I supposed to know that would happen?! It's not my fault!" She fumed.

Bey covered her face with her hand and frowned. What little of her mouth was visible twitched. "Did h-he do this to m-my baby? Please," she added as an afterthought, with a hint of pleading in her voice, "p-please, do not lie t-to me."

Halle stopped just short of the foot of the bed, jaw only slightly tighter than usual. She wouldn't lie to her mother. She couldn't. She could never. Not with the constant fear that the woman would see right through her. "No mommy," she shook her head. "She did that to herself. I think she stuck her hand in a socket..."

"No I didn't!" Blue yelled, turning towards her sister. "I told you I stuck the wires in there, not my hand stupid!"

Halle winced at the insult but stayed quiet.

The woman's eyebrows knitted together and her lips pursed in distaste as she sighed knowing her girls spoke truth. She would not yell at Blue. But wait they've had the conversation about the dangers of electrical outlets since Blue was a wee tot. "Why w-would you do that!" Beyoncé raised her voice suddenly. "You could've k-killed yourself!" The bulging vein in her neck made an appearance.

"That's what I said," Halle saw the tension in her mom's eyes. Without a word, she sat beside her on  the bed and folded her arms.

"I had to distract the man! Halle said so!" Blue pointed and pouted, snuggling into her mother's stomach.

Halle pushed the little hand from her face."Don't blame me! All you had to do was wait!"

"That ugly man was coming!" Blue countered hotly. "And you said!"

"Stop saying I said because I didn't!" The teen leaned closely to Blue's face.

Beyoncé's fierce gaze unknitted and a softer one assumed its place. "Y-you should've b-been there to s-stop her. She's six! A-ain't been six f-for a week!" The woman bellowed.

Halle stood on a dime. "I was trying to get Chloe so we could all leave!"

Tears clouded Beyoncé's vision as she shook her head, cradling Blue's head. "I-I told you two t-to never separate f-from each other! I-I said to never be alone while y-y'all here! Did I not? Now l-look at my baby h-hand! You're her b-big sister. You supposed to p-protect her by any m-means! My GOD!"

"And you're our mom!" Halle recoiled with a snarl. "You're supposed to protect all of us! Look where we are! How could you let him leave with Chloe mommy? How could you?" She wept.

The words were intended to hurt and they did - like burning hot coals being pressed into the woman's broken heart. "Do it l-look like I'm in the position t-t-to call any shots?" Bey kicked her foot out, making the metal clink together. "Huh? Could I-I have stopped him from l-leaving with her with this thing on m-my leg and a-a-a gun pointed in m-my face?" She did not wait for the shocked reply that was already rushing forth from her child's lips. "Sometimes y-you got—you gotta think, like you should've th-thought long and h-hard about leaving your sister by h-herself after I a-already said what I-I said!" Bey spat and heard in her own voice a condemnation of herself. Could I have done more? She thought.

Halle swallowed hard and blinked, eyes stinging with salty tears. She knew she deserved that coldness and worse. Her sister was injured under her watch. She knew deep down Chloe wouldn't have left Blue in a million years. She would have hoisted the girl on her back just to go two seconds  down the hallway. But Halle was no Chloe. She couldn't carry Blue. Chloe was bigger both weight wise and height. She was stronger both mentally and physically but all Halle could think to do was compare herself to her brighter older sibling. "I'm sorry." The thirteen year old clutched at the front of her shirt as if it choked her. "I'm sorry." She repeated, this time giving the sentiments to the six year old who sniffled in her mother's lap.

Beyoncé swallowed back a quiet sob, biting her still-raw bottom lip to keep it still. Tears would do no good now. She moved Blue so that she was on the side of her and forced her lungs to suck in a deep breath, unsure if the tightness in her chest was grief, fear, or extreme exhaustion. There in the silence of the dimly lit room, her heart pounded louder than it had for hours. She tucked her chin to her chest as best she could, but guilt still tore at her throat and that angered her to no return. "I'll g-get you two out. Mommy w-will protect you." The words would have been beautiful if they hadn't been spit with venom in every syllable.

Bey was quiet suddenly. Her normal poise returned, eyes closed for a beat while she breathed. When she opened them again, no trace of virulent anger remained. Blue glanced upwards. Halle watched the woman as she surveyed the chain. Composure regained, Beyoncé grabbed the restraint with both of her hands, not caring that one of her wrists hurt like hell. She had to get her and her babies out of there. Pain laced through her right leg as she shifted it over a pile of pillows and over the edge of the bed. She gritted her teeth as the raw skin on her left ankle protested mightily, resisting the movement. I will get them out! I will! She thought as she yanked against the chains. She pulled and pulled, teeth clenched so tight she thought one of her pearly whites would crack. "Ughhhh!" She grunted as she struggled.

Halle whimpered seeing her mother sweat and struggle as she yanked. No other thought crossed her mind as she leaned over, placing her hands on the chains. Together they were pulling. Blue crossed her fingers and closed her eyes as she watched the two go for broke with their relentless tugs.

"Come on!" Halle screamed at the chains as if that would help.

More tugging, more pulling, more yelling, more stressing and then...

A loud click that sounded unlike any other clicks stopped them dead. "I think we almost got it," Halle smiled out of breath.

Bewildered, the woman sat, half on her side, half on her back, knees twisted up and back arched. She dared a look down. A surge of delight twisted in her gut. The chain on her ankle? It was loose.

It would be a simple matter of kicking it off!

With utmost concentration she pressed the foot of her other leg against the loosened lock. With a bit of wiggling of her toes the metal band slid over her ankle. It needed to turn before she could fully pry the ring open.

With minimal effort it clicked again.

Bey began to kick with her loose right leg, producing a massive amount of noise with all of the metal screeching against each other. The blonde sat back up against the headboard as far as she could, jerked as hard as she could, feeling the metal slip over her skin.

With a tug, her foot was set free.

"You did it mommy!" Blue squealed. "You did it!" She stood on the bed behind her mother and threw her arms around her shoulders, nearly choking her. Bey winced but still smiled as she tapped Blue's arm lovingly, giving her a subtle signal to let go. Halle toyed with her hands awkwardly, looking at the ratty comforter, unspeaking. The blonde looked at her for half a second before she swooped in for a hug, pressing long kisses into her daughter's messy locks and holding her as if her hand wasn't covered in new scars and drying blood. Blue observed closely as her mom seemed to hold Halle like a lifeline, murmuring into her hair words that the six year old couldn't hear. With a final kiss to Halle's forehead – right on that scar just above her eyebrow – Bey pulled away. "Thank you baby." She smiled.

The teen didn't say any words. She smiled subtly and pecked her mother's cheek.

This seemed to appease her. "Let's go," the blonde nodded once. Then her face clouded over as she clumsily dismounted the bed by herself, falling straight onto her bottom. Halle, with a yelp, lept from the bed with the greatest of grace and pulled her to her feet before she had a chance to even mutter a complaint.

"Come on Ivy Blue," Halle said as she held her hand out for her sister to grab.

Blue gave a mighty roll of her eyes but nonetheless took a hold of the waiting hand and huffed out her distaste for the name as Halle helped her from the bed.

The teen's arm had snuck around her mother's waist and though the woman flinched from the biting pain she allowed it to stay there. This will all be over when we escape, the blonde thoughts as she limped towards the door. But what if he catches us? What if he sees? He's gonna be livid. He's gonna be so mad. She blocked the thought from her mind and with all her bravery continued on, taking a hold of Blue's left hand and nearly toppling over. The act made Halle tighten her arm around her waist and lean her head into the woman's side. They were almost there. Bey could see the room straight ahead. This would be their escape. At least she hoped it would.

"We're almost there mommy," Blue encouraged with a wry smile. There was a sincere look of affection in the girl's eyes, but Bey answered with a hard swallow and a tentative squeeze of her shaking hand.

By the time the trio reached the other room, they were all lethargic and mentally exhausted. Bey thought about going back to the kitchen to give her daughters a quick drink of water after noticing their dried and cracked lips but they had already wasted so much precious time.

The three of them stood in the middle of the pink room, Beyoncé was barely able to keep from retching all over the place. The right side of her body, the side closest to Blue was numb and painful all at the same time. She gripped both of her daughter's hands, pulling them along until they were in front of the blackened window. Their only escape was through here, though Bey took no hope from it. It felt almost too easy. What if he never left the property. What if this was all a test to see what we'd do if he left us by ourselves. I don't want him to hurt my babies. God please don't let this be a set up. Her thoughts rambled through her mind until she became sick to her stomach.
It felt like an angry snake curled and uncurled in the pit of it. She wanted to throw up – she wanted to beat her own abdomen because that feeling in her gut was driving her insane. Suddenly she was bowled over, clutching her middle.

"Are you okay mommy?" Halle's worried voice interrupted her self loathing thoughts. She needed to calm down.

"Mommy," Blue shook her shoulder when there was no answer.

Why was she panicking? Nothing – absolutely nothing worth panicking over was happening. But it was hard. It was hard, when she felt many invisible chains swarming her body. She felt them crawling up her ankles and shoulders and around her neck, suffocating her.

This is a set up. He's gonna hurt them.

They tightened.

He's gonna hurt your babies.

They contracted.

He's gonna hurt all of them if you try to leave.

Stop. It hurt.

He already said he's gonna kill you if you do so much as move an inch!

Stop it. Please...

You'd die, and no one would notice. You'd die, and no one would give a damn. You'd die, and the world would keep spinning.

"Stop!"

Bey whimpered and hugged herself. The tension in her gut was eating her alive. Fat tears stung her eyes and ran down her cheeks. She rubbed at them with her arm.

Bey tried to block out that voice as she continued to clutch at her midsection. "He got me fucked up!" She murmured. Her clenched fists loosened, her eyes, which she had slammed shut, popped open wide, she stood bolt upright in the middle of the room as the truth of the situation and the realization of her lack of credulity slammed into her.

Like someone had lit a flame, the blonde frantically stumbled over to the mess that was on the floor. She searched through the pile of broken wood and demolished toys until her eyes landed on a clock. A crazed look was briefly seen in her eyes as she slowly bent to pick it up. Blue and Halle simply watched her storm through the room like a whirlwind. The latter did not understand how her mom could be calm and stormy at once, but Bey's frozen features and cold movements together with that tumultuous, furious look in her eyes, spoke of trouble.

Blue held her right hand to her chest, eyes following her mom until she once again stood before the window. She was pale and tired looking, and that huge sweater she wore washed out her features even more, making her look deathly ill.

"Back up Baba," Bey moved her out of the way.

With wide eyes, Halle pulled Blue back further, watching as her mother raised the clock in the air with the bravado of a crane ready to knock a building clean out of the sky. "S-stay back okay?" The woman eyed both of her daughters who nodded their responses.

The snake never left her alone, no matter where she went. It was with her, always, hiding in a tight ball in her stomach, waiting for her to lower her guard. It would try to crawl up her throat. Bey's hands trembled as she clutched at her clothes, her knuckles going white.

The emblematic snake was eating her – eating her from the inside. It wanted to nibble its way out. Each bite hurt because she was a weak shit who couldn't even save herself, let alone her children.

Get it through your thick skull already– you can't win! You're nobody's hero! You're everyone's problem!

Bey went to chuck the clock but she choked. Stilled. Vomit. She needed to vomit. The snake was already at her throat. She heard panting, and it took her a few minutes to realize it was coming from her.

"Breathe," Halle told her. "Breathe. Just calm down."

But she couldn't. Her heart rammed dangerously at her chest. It felt like her own body wanted to kill itself. "God!" She yelped, desperately gasping for air. Halle's heavy hand on her shoulder almost gave her a heart attack. She already felt like she was dying. She didn't need any jump scares.

"Mommy calm down PLEASE!" Halle's lip quivered.

The blonde recognized when her daughter was on the brink of a full blown meltdown that could possibly last for hours on end, but she couldn't do anything to help her at this moment.

"The window." Blue pointed sadly. She wanted out and fast. "Mommy the windowww." She whined.

"I-I" Beyoncé stammered. She had the window of opportunity; she just didn't have the strength to leave; fear taking hold of her weak limbs and encompassing every inch of her already sullied mind. She knew that she at least had to try but that got harder and harder with each passing second. Briefly she wondered what her life would be like after she escaped. Yes, she and her children would keep living, but then what? How would they cope? How would they overcome this?

And that thought – that thought she kept pushing down to keep her sanity was tattooed in the back of her mind: They're going to die here. They're going to die. Maybe not physically but this version of them would cease to exist, just like the version of herself she was forced to forget all those years ago. Right now her life felt like a merry-go-round, spinning in an endless, repetitive loop without actually going anywhere. With each passing moment here, the hours, minutes, seconds were eating away at their souls. They were all dying. She was dying.

"I-I can't b-breathe!" Bey dropped to her knees, face screwed.

She wasn't sure when everything started to blur. Time meant nothing anymore, and while panting and clutching at her chest, her crying children began to blend into the background, turning into nothing but smudged up colors and buzzing noises her brain couldn't understand. The only thing she could hear was a blaring ringing in her ear.

Bey recognized the empty hole in her chest. She'd had it before. It hurt. She would usually try to ignore it by overwhelming herself with her career and motherly duties. That worked wonders, so she hadn't felt like this since... since she was in her late teens, experiencing her first leaps into womanhood. She'd been so alone...But she was not that girl anymore so why did the angry snake in her gut keep returning? Why? Why couldn't it just leave her be?

"Mommy."

Bey looked up.

"We have to go." Halle pleaded with a tearful expression.

"M-my chest..." her voice came out as a squeak. She swallowed it down and tried again, still clutching over her heart. "My st-stomach." It didn't sound any better.

Halle didn't say anything for a while, until... "He's gonna come back soon, and I don't wanna be here when he does. Mommy let's go! Please!"

I can't. I'm stuck. He won. But she couldn't tell her baby that. She couldn't. She just couldn't. Just because she was a mess didn't mean she had to throw her mess at her kids as well. "C-can you help m-me stand?" Bey sighed, willing the pain to go away. This was such bad timing. She'd been feeling awful for the past two days but this was something else. The last time this had happened, she had a full on mental breakdown all alone in her room with no one to witness her pain. She couldn't let it happen here. Not in front of her kids. Keep calm, get up, get your babies out of here!

The woman took a deep breath. "I-I'm gonna get y'all out." She said, but it sounded so fake she doubted her girls would fall for it.

THIS  IS ALL FOR NOW. A peek into  my drafts

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