(The dialogue works the same as last chapter)
In an empty field pretty far from the town of Axel, a man was being chased by a giant toad.
Kazuma: "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! HELP ME!!!"
That was man was Kazuma. A bit further from him and the toad, Y/N and Aqua were watching the quite hilarious scene they were witnessing. Aqua, of course, laughing. And Y/N contemplating his life choices for the 39th time in the last few weeks.
Aqua: "Oh, man, this is hilarious! Y/N, look at Kazuma's face! He's all red and he's about to cry! He's super desperate!"
Y/N: "Yeah, I uh... Pfft."
Kazuma: 'I'm gonna bury those two alive before I head back.'
The party of three had accepted a kill quest this morning, which was to kill 5 giant toads in 3 days. Right after getting a bare minimum of equipment, of course. Y/N and Kazuma each got a short sword and a belt, while Aqua refused to get anything, saying her pure status as a goddess would corrupt or something. Again, Y/N was sure she's acoustic.
Kazuma: "Y/N, Aqua! Save me!"
Y/N: "Bro, I'd literally be in the situation as you. I just have great mana, not skills."
Kazuma: "YOU'RE BOTH USELESS!"
Y/N: "You ass. I'm not like this blue thing. I'm not laughing, am I?"
Kazuma: "Well, true. Hmm? Wait, why isn't she laughing?"
Turning around to look at where she was standing, Y/N and Kazuma the giant toad that was chasing Kazuma a moment ago in her place. And a leg with a blue boot sticking out of its mouth.
Y/N: "... She got eaten."
Kazuma: "Yeah, I can see that. Help her!"
Y/N: "Oh, right."
Y/N hacked away at the toad with his sword until it died with a croak. He and Kazuma pulled Aqua out of its mouth, and she was crying. Of course she was. Also, she was covered in stinky toad gunk. Or saliva. Or slime. Doesn't matter, she still stinks.
Aqua: sniff "Thank you, Y/N, Kazuma! Thank you!"
She clung onto Y/N.
Y/N: "Ew! Let go! You stink!"
She didn't, so Kazuma pulled her away from Y/N.
Kazuma: "How about we head back for today? We're too weak for these things. Let's get some better gear and then finish this."
Aqua stood up.
Aqua: "I'm all dirty."
Y/N: "You don't say?"
Aqua: "If my devout believers were to see me like this, I'd lose their devotion! If it got out that I backed down from a lowly frog, my name as the beautiful and stunning goddess of water Aqua-sama will fall to the rock bottom!"
Y/N: 'She says that, but she enjoys doing manual labor and get so drunk she vomits rainbows. How does that even work, actually? And doesn't she drool while she sleeps? And stracthes her stomach? I feel like she isn't allowed to say anything about being dirty and stuff.'
And so, Aqua runs at another toad further away.
Kazuma: "Hey, Aqua! Wait!"
She did not wait.
Aqua: "Feel the power of the gods! Regret you ever stood in my path and bared your fangs at the gods, and repent in the pits of Hell! God Blow!"
She raised her fist as she ran, and a yellow or slightly orange light charged up in it. This left Y/N and Kazuma slightly impressed. Only slightly.
Aqua: "God Blow is a lethal fist that carries a goddess's rage and sorrow! Any it strikes will perish!"
She hit the the toad. It did not perish. Its flesh only jiggled a little as the force of her punch was nullified. It looked down at Aqua.
Aqua: "N-Now that I can take a good look at you, I think you lil' froggies are kinda cute."
Y/N: "It's a toad."
It ate her. Y/N and Kazuma went to save her after a while of watching her being eaten, just to spite her.
After that little fiasco, the three went back to Axel and Aqua took a bath. In the evening, they were sharing a meal, a few plates of frog meat, when Aqua said something kinda smart for once.
Aqua: "Let's get some new party members. There's three of us, but you two are too weak. We need more people like me, people who have advanced classes."
Y/N: "You got eaten by two different toads. And saved by us. How are we weak?"
Aqua: "You're both the weakest class, remember?"
Y/N: "... Point seen."
Kazuma: "But seriously, 5,000 eris per frog. We earned the same amount of money as we earn from our part-time construction job. And we risked our lives. It really isn't worth it, is it?"
Y/N: "That's true. What really is the point of being an adventurer if we don't earn any more than from part-time jobs? We could have died, man. Can we just retire?"
Aqua: "What are you saying?! I need you two to defeat the Demon King so I can go home! So, we need allies! Strong ones!"
Y/N: "And we're supposed to get some... how, exactly?"
Kazuma: "Yeah. We're beginners with no equipment. There's no way some strong guys will just appear outta nowhere and wanna join our party."
Aqua: mouth full of food "You've got me here, so allies-"
Kazuma: "Swallow. Swallow before you talk."
She gulped down some beer along with her food, and continued.
Aqua: "I'm an arch priest, the most advanced job there is! People'll come running to us like their life depended on it! I'm sure of it! Even more so if I asked for party members out of nowhere! Everyone would say things like "Please take me with you!" "I'll devote myself to you!" And so on!"
Y/N and Kazuma shared a look, equally annoyed and weirded out by how Aqua acts. But her being so optimistic did give them a sliver of hope that they'd recruit at least a few party members.
The next day
Aqua: "... No one's coming."
It's been over half a day since the three put up a recruitment poster. So far, no one has even looked at them. They were sitting at a table, just waiting.
Y/N: "You know, maybe it's because you made it so bad. Seriously, did you need to flaunt yourself? It's weird and narcissistic. And the requirements to get hired being having to be an advanced class?"
Kazuma: "Yeah, we should lower the bar. A lot."
Aqua: "But... But..."
Y/N: 'And she's about to cry again.'
Kazuma: "Seriously, no one will approach us with that kinda requirement. Sure, you might have an advanced job, but Y/N and I are the weakest job. We'll feel oppressed or something if we're surrounded by elite people."
Ignoring Kazuma, Y/N turned around when he heard foot steps, and saw a girl around his age approaching. She had brown hair, more on the darker side, and a part of her hair reached her shoulders on each side.
She was wearing a wizard outfit, its main colors being red and black, with a side of yellow and brown on the details.
Her hat was large, and had a face made of big red buttons with yellow yarn making an x on each. There was a mouth that went around the whole hat sewn into it, the base yellow and the teeth outlines made of red.
She had a black cape with yellow outlines. She wore a red dress, with a yellow line and triangles near the helm. The dress showed her shoulders, although they were mostly hidden by the cape. Around her waist was a brown leather belt. On her hands she wore black fingerless gloves with an open spot on the back on each.
She wore a black thigh high on her left thigh and a bandage wrapped around her right thigh. Her boots reached her calves.
The staff she had was also wrapped with bandages around where she held it. It had a blue crystal in a spot where the wood made a half circle near the tip.
Lastly, she had red eyes. Although she wore an eyepatch with a white cross on her left eye, so Y/N could only assume they were both red.
Y/N: '... Oh damn. She's kinda cute. Does she... wanna join our party? Pfft. Yeah, no. No way someone that cute would join us.'
?: "I happened to notice your recruitment poster."
Y/N: 'Okay, I was wrong. She does wanna join. Wait what?'
When they heard her voice, Kazuma and Aqua also looked at her.
?: "That we would meet is a fate chosen by the world itself. I have anxiously awaited the arrival of those such as yourselves."
She put her hand in front of her face and made a peace sign with her thumb sticking out.
Y/N: 'Wait, did her eye just glow? I... I guess that's kinda cool.'
Next, she flung her arms out to her sides, making her cape flow in the air. Striking a pose, her eye glew stronger as she looked at the three with a serious face, holding the edge of her hat.
Megumin: "My name is Megumin! My calling is that of an arch wizard, one who controls explosion magic, the strongest of all offensive magic!"
Dead silence.
Y/N: "Uh..."
Megumin: Do you, too, desire my forbidden strength, which is so almighty, I've been ostracized by the entire world?"
Y/N: '... She's using some mighty words... Well, the way she made herself sound pretty strong was... okay.'
Megumin: "Then show me thine resolve to peer into the ultimate abyss with me! When man stares into the abyss, the abyss stares back."
Y/N: '... Okay, her chuuni act is getting annoying already.'
Kazuma: "Are you here just to make fun of us? If you are, please leave."
Megumin: "N-No!"
She broke out of character for a moment, and Aqua noticed something.
Aqua: "Hey, that red eye... Are you a crimson demon?"
Y/N: 'The hell is that?'
Megumin: "Indeed! I am Megumin, user of the finest magic crimson demons possess! My lethal magic demolishes mountains, smashes boulders..."
She fell onto all fours, making Y/N go kneel next to her to see if she's okay.
Y/N: "You good? Something wrong?"
Her stomach made a loud noise.
Megumin: "I haven't eaten anything in days. Um... Would you happen to have anything I could eat? I-It's fine if you don't..."
Y/N: "Oh. Well, I could treat you to a meal, I guess."
Megumin: "T-Thank you..."
After a moment, all four of them were sitting around the table, Megumin with a plate of food as she sat next to Y/N. As she was munching on it, Kazuma spoke up.
Kazuma: "By the way, what's with the eyepatch? If you're injured, you can have her heal it." points at Aqua
Y/N: "One of her few strong suits is healing magic."
Aqua: "Few?"
Y/N: "Few."
Megumin: swallows food "This eyepatch is a seal which holds back my immense magical power. If it were to ever be taken off, the world would be doomed..."
Y/N: "Huh. Really?"
Megumin: "No, that was a lie. I just like how it looks."
Y/N pulled on it, getting a tired of her chuuni act.
Megumin: "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Don't pull on it, please! It'll snap! S-Stop it!"
Y/N let go, making the eyepatch hit Megumin's eye a bit hard.
Megumin: "Ouch! My eye!"
Aqua: "Fun fact, crimson demons all have high intelligence and magical powers. All of them are elite mages, but they all have weird names and behavior."
Y/N: "Huh, that so?"
Kazuma: "I thought you were just pulling a prank on us with that weird name and act."
Megumin: "Hey, calling my name is rude. To me, everyone else's names are weird."
Y/N: "Well, I've heard weirder. I think Megumin is fine."
Megumin: "Huh? Really?"
Y/N: "Yeah?"
Megumin stared at Y/N, and blinked a few times.
Megumin: "Huh... This is the first time someone hasn't made fun of my name in this town."
She looked down at her plate, not used to this kind of stuff. Not that she was shy or embarrassed, just not sure how to react. Y/N also didn't say anything and leaned on his hand with his elbow on the table.
Kazuma: "Hey, by the way. What are your parents' names?"
Megumin looked up and after processing the question, struck another pose.
Megumin: "My mother is Yuiyui, and my father is Hyoaizaburo!"
Y/N: "Okay, those are weird."
Megumin: "!"
Kazuma: "Wow, you're blunt."
Y/N: "Shush."
A short while later
The three were looking at Megumin's adventurer card while she was still eating.
Aqua: "These cards can't be forged. Her magic's just as powerful as it says. Definitely an arch wizard. A powerful advanced job that can command powerful offensive magic! And she said she can use explosion, the strongest offensive magic! We should let her join!"
Kazuma: "Yeah, her magic stat is really high..."
Y/N: "Explosion sounds pretty cool-"
In an instant, Megumin was right up at Y/N's face. A bit too close.
Megumin: "You think explosion is cool?! Really?! Do you really understand how magnificent of a spell explosion is?!"
Y/N: "Too close! Too close! Personal space, okay?!"
He pushed her away.
Y/N: "I have no idea if it's actually cool or not, it just gives the impression with the name, you know?"
Megumin: "Then, I shall show you the might of explosion magic! Let's pick a quest so I can blow your expectations to smithereens, along with any monsters we face!"
Kazuma: "Well, we do have an active quest right now, so we could finish that."
Megumin: "Excellent! Then, let us venture forth!"
Leaving her plate half-finished, Megumin stood up and began walking out of the guild building. The three others followed after her.
Back at the fields
After a walk back to the empty fields the party had been to yesterday, Megumin was still just as excited. The party was standing at a safe distance from a toad, Megumin in front.
Megumin: "Explosion magic is the strongest magic. As such, it has a long casting time. So, I'd appreciate it if you could keep that frog there still until I'm done casting."
Y/N: "It's a toad."
Megumin: "Shush."
Kazuma: "Alright, I can do it."
Aqua: "Ah. Kazuma, there's anohter one over there."
A toad was hopping towards them in the distance.
Y/N: "Oh, two at once. Fun."
Kazuma: "Megumin, target the frog in the distance. We'll handle the one coming closer."
Megumin: "Roger."
Kazuma: "Actually, Y/N."
Y/N: "Huh?"
Kazuma: "Guard Megumin. Aqua and I'll handle the other frog."
Y/N: "Toad. But okay, sure."
He turned back to the first toad and saw Megumin getting ready to cast.
Kazuma: "Okay, Aqua, let's go. You are a former something-or-other, right? Please show off your former ability for once."
Aqua: "What do you mean, "former"?! I'm still a goddess! And always will be!"
Megumin: "... Goddess?"
Y/N: "Ignore her. She's not right in the head."
Megumin: "I see... Poor Aqua."
Aqua is, once again, on the verge of crying.
Aqua: "C-Come on, these frogs may be strong against physical attacks, but I'm gonna show them who's boss this time! For sure!"
She started running at the toad, holding her staff with a flower pud tip. Where'd she get it from? No idea.
Aqua: "Watch this, Kazuma, Y/N! I'll show you the powers of a goddess such as myself this time! Tremble before me and fall asleep! God Requiem!"
This time, instead of the light going to her fist, the light went to her spear's tip.
Aqua: "God Requiem is a goddess' requiem of love and sorrow! Any it strikes will perish!"
Y/N: "That sounds awfully familiar."
The toad ate her before she even hit it.
Y/N: "Such a noble goddess. Putting her life on the line for us."
Kazuma: "Agreed. Her death won't be in vain."
Y/N: "I don't think she's dead yet."
Suddenly, a strong wind came from Megumin's direction. It was her magic being cast. She held her staff high, multiple lines of black and dark blue streaks of mana being absorbed into the crystal in her staff.
Megumin: "Darkness blacker than black and darker than dark, I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson. The time of awakening cometh. Justice, fallen upon the infalliable boundary, appear now as an intangible distortion! Dance, dance, dance! I desire for my torrent of power a destructive force: a destructive force without equal! Return all creation to cinders, and come from the abyss! This is the mightiest means of attack known to man, the ultimate attack magic! EXPLOSION!!!"
As she chanted, the streaks of mana circled above the toad, making the surrounding area completely dark. It circled to a singular point, making a bright slightly orange light. The moment she finished chanting, stars of mana of all colors appeared from the mana, each more vibrant than the previous. The singular point descended upon the toad, and a pillar of fire and destruction burst forth, high into the sky. The force of it sent the other toad flying and nearly knocked Y/N and Kazuma off their feet. And then, as fast it came, it was gone, leaving behind only a red hot crater and no trace of the toad.
Kazuma: "Wow... So this is magic?"
Y/N: "..."
Kazuma: "What? Left speechless?"
Y/N: "... Holy fuck. Kazuma, we need to let her join the party. Do you see this destruction? It's amazing!"
Kazuma: "Don't tell me you just became obsessed with explosion."
Y/N: "I have no idea what you're talking about."
A sound coming from behind them made them focus on the quest again. The sound came from a toad that rose up from the ground.
Kazuma: "Guess the explosion woke it up... Megumin! Let's back off for now and-"
Insert Megumin sliding on the ground.
Y&K: "Huh?"
Megumin: "While my ultimate magic, explosion, possesses tremendous might, in turn, it consumes tremendous amounts of mana. Basically, I used magic that goes past my limits, so I can't move at all at the moment."
Y&K: "Huh?"
Megumin: "This is bad. Y/N, Kazuma, please help me. I'm about to be eaten. I don't wanna know what it's li-"
She got eaten. Now there were two toads with girls in their mouths. Kazuma ran to the one with Aqua in its mouth and Y/N to the one with Megumin.
Kazuma: "You just had to get eaten, didn't you?!"
Y/N: "I should have chosen to be reborn as a baby."
Later in the day, around evening
One of the good things from this was that they finished the quest. Bad thing is, Y/N and Kazuma now have two girls covered in slime with them. Y/N's worse off though, as hes giving Megumin a piggy back ride.
Aqua: "I stink... I stink so much!"
Megumin: "The inside of a frog is pretty smelly, but otherwise, it's nice and warm..."
Y/N: "Didn't wanna know that. So, why exactly do I have to carry her?"
Kazuma: "I don't wanna. Besides, you're the one who saved her. Don't you feel inclined to carry her?"
Y/N: "No."
Kazuma: "What did I expect? Anyway, Megumin. Explosion magic is banned, except in emergencies. Make do with other magic."
Megumin: "No."
Kazuma: "Huh?"
Megumin: "Explosion's the only magic I can use."
Y/N: "For real?"
Megumin: "For real."
Silence. A girl chasing a few geese ran by.
Aqua: "Wait, if you're strong enough to use explosion, shouldn't you know some other magic, too? I learned all the party trick skills before the arch priest skills."
Y/N: "What's party trick skills got to do with anything?"
Aqua: "Everything."
Y/N: "..."
Megumin: "I am an arch wizard who loves nothing more than explosion. I devote myself to it. Every other magic is insignificant compared to explosion. Explosion magic is the only one for me! Of course, it'd be a lot easier for me to go on adventures if I learned other magic, but... Every other magic is garbage! I only love explosion magic! Even if there's a once-per-day limit, or if I can't move afterwards, I will keep using it till the end of time! I will never use any other magic! The reason I chose the path of an arch mage is purely so I could cast explosion magic!"
Silence. Kazuma looked at her like she's crazy. Aqua was looking at her blankly, and Y/N was... conflicted. While her devotion to explosion magic was impressive to him, the cons of it were also huge. Sure, it's strong and would probably kill most monsters they encountered, but having to carry her like this every time and only being able to use it once a day were going to be big problems.
Aqua: "Wonderful! Simply wonderful! Even though it's so inefficient, I'm moved by your romantic pursuit!"
Kazuma: 'Damn, this magician's hopeless. Aqua agreeing with her is proof enough. And she's useless, too, based on our fights.'
Aqua and Megumin gave each other a thumbs up.
Megumin: "So, Y/N. Did I or did I not blow away your expectations of explosion magic? Are you not entertained? Impressed?"
Y/N: "Well, uh... Okay, I can't lie, that was badass."
Kazuma: "Y/N, no."
Megumin: "See?! Explosion really is the best magic in existence!"
Megumin clung tighter onto Y/N now.
Megumin: "I knew we would see eye-to-eye!"
Kazuma: "Oh, dammit."
Megumin: "So, you'll let me join your party, right? You'll have the most powerful magic in your arsenal, and all I ask for is food and sundries. Is it not a killer deal? You'd be an idiot to refuse this deal."
Kazuma: "U-Um... S-Sorry, but your talent and prowess would be wasted in a party like ours. Once we get to the guild, we'll split the reward equally, and if we ever meet up again, maybe we can-"
Y/N: "Urk."
Kazuma: "Eh?"
Hearing Kazuma, Megumin tightened her grip around Y/N's neck, actively choking him.
Megumin: "Please! I've got nowhere else to go! I'm poor and today was the first time I ate in a week! If you don't let me join your party, you'll be responsible for ruining my life! Please let me join! Please!"
Y/N: 'Wow, emotional manipulating. How scary.'
Kazuma: "H-Hey, calm down. You're choking Y/N."
Megumin: "I'll carry your things and do your chores and whatever! Just please let me join! I'll be forced to live in the streets! You can't just abandon me and ruin my life like that!"
Bystander: "How awful. That man wants to ruin a young girl's life, just like that!"
Kazuma: "Huh?"
The people around had taken notice at this scene. And totally misunderstood.
Bystander 2: "And she's even covered in slime while clinging onto another man out of fear. That man is truly despicable!"
Well, yeah, that's what it looks like to other people.
Bystander 3: "Look, the other girl is covered in it, too! What perverse things did that man do to them? And did he force that other man to go along with him?!"
People really don't like Kazuma, it seems.
Kazuma: "H-Hey, it isn't like that! You've got the wrong idea!"
Megumin: smug
Y/N: 'Oh man, I'm gonna pass out soon.'
Megumin let go slightly and leaned closer to Kazuma.
Megumin: "I'm fine with any lewd things you like! Even the slime play just now! I'll even let Y/N and you to-"
Kazuma quickly covers her mouth with a red face full of sweat.
Kazuma: "OKAY, OKAY, I GET IT! WELCOME TO THE PARTY, MEGUMIN! JUST DON'T TALK ANYMORE!"
Y/N: "Ain't no way she just said that with a straight face."
Aqua: "She just did."
Later
As Megumin and Aqua went to take a bath to wash off the toad slime, Y/N and Kazuma went to the guild to get the reward for the quest. The guild building was mostly empty, with just a few drunkards drinking.
Luna: "I've confirmed that you have completed your quest. Thank you for your hard work."
Kazuma: "Huh. I went up two levels. Less than I expected."
Y/N: "I went up three. I win."
Kazuma: "It's not a competition. But still, it's cool how we get stronger by just killing some monsters."
Luna: "Oh, the newer the adventurer, the faster they'll grow. Don't except to level up as fast from now on."
She took the reward for the quest from behind the counter and handed it to Kazuma.
Luna: "Adding up the sale of the giant toads, and your quest completion reward, your total comes to 110,000 eris. Please verify the amount."
The two of them went to sit at an empty table to count the money.
Kazuma: "110,000 eris split between 4 people comes to around 27,000 per person."
Y/N: "That's not a lot, is it?"
Kazuma: "Not really. Risking our lives for that little isn't all that great. It's not worth it."
Y/N: "True. And it's too bad all the other quests were insane. Who would willingly be a human test subject?"
Kazuma: "I dunno, a super masochist or something."
Y/N: "This world is crazy."
Kazuma: "I wanna go back to Japan. We got a new ally, but she's a lost cause."
Y/N: "Well, we'll see. Maybe it'll be fine."
Kazuma: "Let's hope so."
?: "I happened to see your recruitment poster."
Y&K: "Huh?"
The two turned to the voice and saw a woman clad in yellow and white full body armor. On her right shoulder was a decoration that looked like a feather, only very large. She had long blonde hair and blue eyes. She was older than both Y/N and Kazuma and looked very mature. She looked serious, like she hadn't even heard of having fun. She had a sword on her hip, and it seemed quite big.
?: "Are you still recruiting?"
Kazuma: "Uh... W-We are! Although, I wouldn't exactly recommend it..."
Y/N looked at Kazuma, who's blushing and whose voice just cracked. Sometimes he forgets that Kazuma's a shut-in NEET otaku who hasn't talked to women in, like, forever.
?: "I see. Thank goodness. I have anxiously awaited the arrival of those such as yourselves."
Y/N: 'Whoa, flashbacks.'
Outta nowhere, she let out a sensual sigh.
Y&K: 'Huh?'
Darkness: "My name is Darkness. My calling is that of a crusader."
She started breathing rapid, short breaths, her cheeks a slight pink.
Y/N: 'Why's she... Is she moaning? Why does she sound like that?'
Darkness: "Please let... Please let me..."
She moved towards them in a weird way, her body moving from side to side as if she lost her balance for a moment.
Darkness: "... j-j-join your party!"
Turns out, she's a pervert.
Y/N: 'What the actual fuck?'
(Hello. Author here. Thank you reading the second chapter. I hope you enjoyed. Uh, nothing else to say, so, see ya.)