Chapter 41
Nine months later
"And how are the dreams?" Dr. Reed, a tall woman in her late fifties with greying hair, asked as she tilted her head slightly to listen to Birdie.
"I still have them," Birdie answered, not wanting to hide anything from her doctor. "But I have been writing them down."
Lies.
Birdie didn't write about those nightmares. She didn't want to remember them.
"Good," Dr. Reed nodded. "Has that been helping you understand them better?"
"Yes," Birdie nodded.
"Good," Dr. Reed said once more in her soothing voice. "And how are things with Adan?"
Taking in a long deep breath, Birdie rubbed her palms against her jeans and thought about her words before speaking.
"Things are progressing," she said. "We had dinner last week."
"How was that?"
"Different?"
"How so?"
"I had a good time at dinner," Birdie said.
"How did you feel afterwards?"
"Fine," Birdie said. "Maybe very tired. We stayed out late."
"What did you guys talk about during dinner?"
"About our old friends, family, movies, Kiara and Killian's new baby."
"Have you gone to see the baby?"
"Yes," Birdie smiled. "He is adorable. Looks just like Killian."
"Do they have a name yet?" Dr. Reed asked. "I know they were still thinking of something."
"Mathias," Birdie smiled thinking of the little boy in Kiara's arms.
"That's a beautiful name."
"It is," Birdie said. "Much better than the other names they were thinking of."
"Did you go with Adan to see the baby?"
"Yes, we went together."
"How was that?" Dr. Reed asked. "You two have been making more public appearances together. How do you feel about that?"
"Everyone knows we're just trying things out," Birdie said. "It's been fine. He's always been my friend first before anything else. I like spending time with him."
"In the past two weeks have you thought about Wren?"
Birdie felt her heart contract painfully, "....No."
Dr. Reed patiently waited for Birdie with her hands folded on her notepad and her pen down.
"Just a bit," Birdie looked past the doctor to the blank wall behind her.
"When did you think about him?"
Every day, every hour, every minute, every second, Birdie pushed down on her thoughts, "Just randomly."
Dr. Reed slowly nodded and wrote down something on her paper. When she looked back up, Birdie was waiting for her to respond.
"I'm lying," Birdie said.
"I know," Dr. Reed conformed.
"I thought about him a lot."
"And you will continue to think about him a lot," Dr. Reed explained. "Like we talked about before, he's not just going to disappear from your memories. It will take time."
"I miss him," Birdie felt her chest tighten. She moved her arms around herself and sank back in her seat. "I think about him too often. I don't think this is working."
"I think it is," Dr. Reed insisted. "You're able to talk about him here without breaking down. That's progress."
"Or I'm just immune to crying now."
"That's not possible," Dr. Reed chuckled. "Now, tell me, when you missed him....what were you missing?"
"I don't know," Birdie shrugged. "I just...."
"Do you miss the way he spoke to you?"
"Maybe."
"You had mentioned he was rude and mean."
"He was," Birdie looked down at her hands. "But he was also very good at saying the right things. He knew what I was thinking. He would just look at me and know what was in my head."
"Some people are very good at that," Dr. Reed said. "They have a talent for it."
"I guess," Birdie shrugged. "I felt free when I was with him. It's silly, I know. I was literally in chains with him and in jail cells and in another universe. But....."
"You felt seen," Dr. Reed finished.
"Yes..." Birdie sighed. "I think so..."
"You two had a connection," the doctor continued. "He understood you and you were beginning to understand him."
"I don't know about the last part," Birdie shrugged. "I don't think I ever knew him or understood him."
"Maybe you were trying not to understand him," Dr. Reed said.
"What do you mean?" Birdie looked up at the woman.
"Do you remember when we spoke about being honest with ourselves?" Dr. Reed moved her notepad and pen over to the coffee table beside her.
"Yes," Birdie nodded.
"Good," Dr. Reed smiled. "I have a homework assignment for you. When you go home tonight, make a list of all the things you knew about Wren."
"Why?"
"Just list things," Dr. Reed said. "And then bring the list to me for our next session."
"You're supposed to be helping me realize my feelings for him are wrong," Birdie frowned. "We keep talking about him and I don't think it's helping."
"Trust the process," Dr. Reed sighed. "I promise you that this is the journey you need to embark on right now to heal yourself."
"I just want to forget him," Birdie said, her voice a small whisper.
"Then we need to first find him in every corner of your mind and heart," Dr. Reed said softly.
____________________
Heyder sat back in his seat with his dark brows knit together and a deep frown upon his face. He rubbed his jaw to work out the tension as his dark brown eyes scanned the map before him.
"What do you suggest we do, Sultan?" one of the jinns asked.
"I say we cast boundary spells along the borders," Azad, who was sitting amongst the council, spoke up.
"No, no," Ali sighed and rubbed his forehead. "We can't cut off the jinns and others from the court. Boundary spells will send the wrong signal and not to mention it's not morally right."
"We call our people back to court," Ira spoke up from the end of the long table.
Birdie hated the way the woman's voice sounded in the throne room of the Tyveer court. His was her home, she had grown up here. But to see Ira present made her insides twist.
"But we don't even know when the next disappearance will happen," Adan pointed out. "It could be where the jinns live or it could be where the witches are."
"Let the witches deal with their people," Ira's eyes narrowed. "Our priority should be our people."
"The witches are my people," Heyder spoke up. "My wife took an oath to protect and serve them. Her people are my people."
"And will your witch supreme wife honor the values for your people, Sultan?" Ira arched her brow, her voice mocking the last word as if it were an insult.
"In a heartbeat," Heyder held his mother's gaze. "Every soul in the veil is my responsibility."
"We're spreading our resources too thin," Ira shook her head. "We should be focused on helping our people."
"And we will help them," Ali said. "But Heyder is right. If we call back the jinns to court, it will be unfair to the witches and pixies who are in the veil."
"Unless we open the court to everyone," Birdie looked at her father.
"Impossible!" Ira spat. "The grounds of the Tyveer Court are sacred. It cannot be opened to everyone. Blood of our blood. That's our motto."
"It's my court," Heyder spun his ring casually.
"But these are our traditions," Ira glared. "As Sultan you must honor traditions."
"When has he ever done that," Ali muttered under his breath.
"Heyder," Ira's voice was hard and demanding. "I am speaking to you as your mother. You can not open court to everyone. It will be breaking traditions and disrespecting our ancestors. They do not want this."
"They're dead," Heyder reminded his mother. "What are they going to do? Get offended and not show up to my daughter's wedding? Oh boohoo, so sad."
"Heyder!" flames erupted in Heyder's eyes.
"I will do what's best for everyone," Heyder's voice grew firm as he stared down at his mother. "My job, as annoying as it is, is to protect all the people of the veil. We can't just think about ourselves. Not only will that be selfish and arrogant, but it will also erupt political issues with all our allies."
"You mean with your wife," Ira laughed. "Tell her to deal with her own people. Why should we have to worry about them?"
"Because I said so!" Heyder's voice rose and bounced off of the stone walls of the hall.
Everyone around the table held their breath. No one dared to move as the mother and son glared at each other from two ends of the long table. Underneath, Adan moved his hand and took Birdie's from her lap, giving it a tight squeeze.
You're not breathing, Adan said through their mind link.
No one is breathing, Birdie slowly filled her lungs.
"Meeting dismissed," Heyder's stern voice spoke once more.
Everyone around the table, except Ira, scurried off with a sigh of relief. Adan released Birdie's hand and stood up before helping her to move her seat back and rise.
"You two headed out?" Ali asked Adan and Birdie.
"Not yet," Adan said. "I just have a few things to go over."
"Alright," Ali nodded. He turned to where Heyder still sat in his seat, glaring at the map of the veil.
"Heyder," Ira began from where she stood.
"Not now," Heyder sighed, quickly rising from his seat and turning towards the door. "I don't care about your lecture right now. Leave a message with Ali if you have a complaint to file."
"Don't look at me, please," Ali held up his hands. "Adan, Birdie, let's go."
Without hesitation, Ali followed Heyder out of the room. Adan was about to reach for Birdie's hand when Ira cleared her throat, causing the pair to look up.
"I would like to speak to my granddaughter," She announced. "In private."
Adan looked at Birdie. He waited until she nodded her head to turn and leave the room. Birdie could feel her grandmother's eyes on her as she moved closer to where she stood beside her chair.
"How are you feeling?" Ira asked.
"Fine," Birdie replied politely. "And you?"
Ira rolled her eyes and avoided the question, "Your friend, Ebony, is moving out of the veil."
"Yes," Birdie nodded. "I know. Adan and I are helping her."
"Hmm," Ira took several slow steps forward. Her hands were folded over her chest, her eyes were lined with dark khol, and her long dark hair was braised down her back. When she came to stand before Birdie, a small smile appeared on her lips.
"Does he know?" Ira asked.
Birdie looked up and arched her brow.
"Adan," Ira said slowly. "He seems like a nice boy."
"He is," Birdie said.
"Does he know about what you did in Pangea?" Ira pinned Birdie with her eyes. "How you betrayed him?"
Birdie felt the boiling rage in the pit of her stomach multiply. Her silver eyes narrowed as she glared at her grandmother.
"Yes, he does," She said. "Not that it should concern you in any way."
"Do your parents know?" Ira asked. She stepped closer and leaned forward. "Does your brother know?"
"That's none of your business," Birdie stepped to the side and headed for the door.
"How do you think Heyder and Hayden will react to knowing you were bought and sold like a whore for the fey?"
Birdie whirled around to face her grandmother, "Excuse me?"
"I can't help but notice how cleverly you left out that piece of information from your family," Ira chuckled. "And you even got your dear friend Ebony to cover for you."
"Where is this conversation going right now?" Birdie asked.
"I was just wondering," Ira sighed and let her hands fall to her side. She walked over to the back of the Sultan's chair and lifted her eyes towards Birdie. "I just lay awake at night wondering how my dear son and grandson will react to finding out their baby bird has spread her legs for the man who would not hesitate to destroy everything they have worked so hard to build."
"You are really sick in the head, grandma," Birdie spat. "You're beyond disgusting."
"And you're not?" Ira clicked her tongue. "You don't think your prince would have destroyed everything he saw before him here? Your family, your brother, your nephew, you."
"You didn't know him."
"I watched him grow up!" Ira laughed. "I knew all of them. They're all the same. What did you think would happen between the two of you? Did you really think you had a future with him? Did you really think you would stand beside him if he ever took the crown?"
Birdie felt her insides churn from Ira's words.
"You stupid girl," the woman continued. "You gave yourself to him knowing how they treated us. Knowing what they thought of us. You are a disgrace to my bloodline."
"You can not speak to me like that," Birdie balled her hands into fists. "My father is the Sultan. This is our court. You are just a dead nightmare who is envious of the power her child has. You are a disgrace."
Ira burst into laughter.
"If you think you can threaten me in-"
"Threaten you?" Ira continued to laugh. "Sweet baby, I would never threaten you."
Birdie felt her skin crawl with energy she couldn't figure out how to release.
"No," Ira shook her head. "I'm not going to threaten you. I'm going to punish you for what you did with that boy."
"I'm going to tell baba."
"Go on," Ira laughed once again. "Tell him how you became the fey's whore. Tell him why you must be punished."
As much as she hated the woman. Birdie knew Ira had cornered her. There was no way she could speak about Wren to her family or to anyone without breaking to bits and pieces.
They would understand her. Of course, they would. But Birdie couldn't face the truth. She couldn't talk to them or let them know about what she did with someone who would not hesitate to kill them all.
"You can't," Ira smirked. "Can you?"
And we're back baby!!! Sooo this is where the 2nd part of the book was suppose to start but I just want to make it one GIANT BOOK.
Hope you liked it <3