Funny thing: This was the very first chapter I wrote of this story. Never ever would I have guessed that it would become my 44th chapter! This is crazy! Thank you all so much for reading! It means a lot.
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A few weeks later - it was a rainy summer day in Phoenix.
Sara was on her trip to New York with her drama class. She had won her paid internship that night and had thrilled audience and judges with her performance. Lindsey had been there with her. Barbara had captured the whole thing with a camera, so Stevie was able to see it as often as she wanted. The rest of Sara's family had been there, too. When the girl had left the stage and the crowd and all of the five judges had cheered, giving her standing ovation, she had jumped happily into Lindsey's arms.
Lindsey still couldn't believe how close they had grown together when Stevie had been gone. It was nearly too good to be true. He didn't know why but something inside of his head was only waiting for the next bad thing to happen. It had just always been like that between Stevie and him – everything was just perfect and all of a sudden it ended up in a mess.
He knew, he shouldn't think like that, rather think positively but he just couldn't get rid of this frightening feeling that everything could fall apart in just a few seconds.
Lindsey and Stevie lay on the couch. It was quite cold outside, so Lindsey had lit a fire and she had cuddled up to him underneath a blanket. They watched TV and she really enjoyed that moment with him.
Stevie sighed, she missed Sara a lot. When she had come back from her tour, they had only spent a few days together, then Sara had to fly to New York. It was the longest period of time she had ever spent without her baby girl and the daily calls just weren't enough for her. She wanted to take her in her arms, feel her little body and look into her brown eyes filled with excitement while she reported everything about her time in the Big Apple.
On the other hand, it was quite nice to have Lindsey for herself. They really enjoyed their time together, working on their relationship.
He looked down at her and saw she was in deep thoughts..
He smiled and squeezed her. She looked up to him and smiled, as well.
“You're good?“, he asked.
“Yeah, I'm fine. I just thought of Sara. I cannot wait for her to return home.“, she sighed.
She noticed his disappointed face and said quickly, "Oh, no, don't get me wrong. I love to be with you. Just the two of us. But I really miss her. She's only 15. It breaks my heart to be without her for so long.“
He smiled.
“I know, Steph. Don't apoligize. I get it. She's after all your baby girl, right?“
He knows me way too well, she thought and nodded.
“She's coming back in two days.“
“I know“, she smiled.
“I miss her, too, you know. I really adore her. She's such a sweetheart.“, he said and placed a kiss on her hair.
They continued watching the movie. A woman just broke down because of her cocaine addiction.
He didn't say a word but she heard him sigh.
“Maybe we better turn it off or switch the program“, he said.
“Why?“, she asked curiously.
“I.. It's just too hard. This....“
She looked up at him. Why was it too hard for him? He never broke down because of an addiction. She did. And she was fine with watching the movie.
“What do you mean?“, she asked.
“It's just... It reminds me of you.“, he mumbled, “it reminds me of that one night, that morning when I found you unconscious lying beside me.“
She looked at him quizzically. “What are you talking about?!“
“You know what I mean. That night back then in 1982...“
“No, I have no idea what you mean, Linds...“, she replied slowly.
He wanted to roll his eyes but when he saw the confused look on her face, he didn't.
“You don't remember?!“
“Obviously, I don't.“, she laughed.
“You nearly died that night. How's it possible you don't remember it?!“, he looked surprised.
“Are you referring to that night in Texas? Halloween?!“
“Of course, I do.“, he said.
“Wait...“, she mumbled, “but you weren't there that night!“, she said roundly.
“Stevie, I called the ambulance! Of course, I was there. I found you!“
“You found me?“, she looked at him absolutely confused.
“You really don't remember that night at all, do you?“, he sighed.
“Well, I remember a few things – but I clearly don't remember you were there...“
“But I was. I will never forget that moment when I woke up after that adventurous night. You lay beside me. I wanted to wake you up but you didn't react at all. I thought you were dead!“, he said, still terrified remembering that moment.
“I got up, I shook you over and over again. You didn't react. I called an ambulance, I called your mother...“, he whispered in thoughts.
“I thought I'd lost you forever..“
“Why were you in my hotel room?“, she asked, ignoring his emotional state of mind.
She couldn't remember him by her side, at all. She knew they had been on a party after the last night of the concert. She had met Sara's father that night. That had been the last time she'd ever seen Henry. Two weeks later, he had had that tragic accident with his motorbike when he crashed into a tree. He had died immediatley. Stevie had never had the chance to tell him, he was the father of their baby when she had found out about her pregnancy a few weeks later.
The next thing she could remember was her waking up at a clinic. Her mother had sat beside her bed with swollen eyes from crying...
“Why I was in your hotel room?“, he repeated laughingly, interrupting her thoughts, “Oh my God, Stevie! Honestly, we've always spent a few nights together on tour...“
“You mean...“, she made a certain gesture with her hand and looked into his eyes.
He laughed playfully.
“Yes, Steph. We had sex.“
Her eyes went wide. Her mouth opened slowly.
“That can't be true!“
“What's wrong with you?“, he joked, “why do you make such a big deal out of it? That happened around 16 years ago. We did that a lot of times back then.“
“But...“, she went on pointlessly, “tell me about that night, Linds. Tell me everything!“
He was still confused about her interest in that specific night but the serious look on her face made him start telling her his story without asking any more questions. It seemed to be important to her.
“Well, you remember after the show when we all went to the party in Mick's suite? Everyone was there..“, he started.
She nodded eagerly.
“You were trying to have a blast. But I knew you felt horrible. You did more coke than I've seen you comsuming ever before. You took one line after another. Drank countless glasses of alcohol and smoked pot. I guess you were trying to hide your feelings... It was awful.“, he paused, “there was this guy, you seemed to be really interested in him. Dark, curly hair, leather jacket... I can't remember his name..“
“Henry!“, she gasped.
“Yeah, whatever. You tried everything to get his attention. Wrapped your arms around him... Anyways, after some time, the both of you disappeared. I followed you.“
Stevie watched him closely.
“You both were outside, near the parking lot. I don't know exactly what happened but all of a sudden you were screaming at him. You wanted to go back to the party. But he... he didn't want to let you go. He was holding your arm, you were trying to fight him back.“
Stevie heard it all for the very first time, she couldn't believe it.
“Well, you told him to fuck off and leave you alone but he didn't. He was holding you and said you shouldn't act like a child... You started to scream. You were terrified. - I was terrified! I ran over to both of you and told him to leave you alone. He refused to do so. And I... Well, I punched him in the face!“, he said, slightly embarrassed of his behavior.
“What happened then?“, she was almost horrified to hear the answer.
“I took you to your hotel room. You were a wreck. I mean he would have raped you, I'm sure.“
“Linds, please. Don't stop, go on!“
“Well, you were so scared, still shaking and wanted me to come in...“, he smiled, “I know I shouldn't have done that, you were miserable, but you know that I've never been able to resist you, Steph.“
Stevie sighed loudly. That cannot be true, please, this is..., she thought to herself.
“The next morning, I woke up, as I said before, I called the ambulance and your mother and that was the last time I saw you for months.“, he ended.
“I have just one question“, he said and looked at her. “why did you ever sleep with that guy? I mean, he almost raped you that night and you forgave him and let him impregnant you only a few weeks later?“, he tried to laugh but the expression on his face said something else.
Stevie got up, she couldn't bear it anymore. That could not be true. She stumbled and walked slowly out of the room. She felt like she was in a dream – a nightmare!
“Steph, where are you going?!“, he yelled from somewhere far away.
She couldn't face him. She walked up the stairs into her room. She crashed the door behind her. She was shocked. If Lindsey's story was true, then... Oh my God! This would make him the father of Sara! She couldn't believe that. That was simply too much for her!