Most people think they know me,
Most of the time,
I think I know me.
But,
I realize,
I don't know the demon inside.
I realize I fume over nothing.
I realize I over thinking something.
Anything.
Most people think they know me,
But how can they know me?
When I don't even know myself?
Nor do I want to know me sometimes.
When I scream in my head,
I wish, I did not.
When my face gets red for rage of embarrassment.
I wish, I was not me.
When my fists clench, locking up my anger.
I wish, I did not know me.
When I scream,
To the ones I love the most.
I wish, I was invisible.
When I ruin happy moments,
I wish, I wish I could take back time.
When I do bad stuff,
When I break good things.
I wish, I did know why
And that the question mark,
That looms so high on my head,
Disappeared.
Sometimes, I hate myself.
For not knowing,
I wish, I knew.
But they just happen.
I wish, I knew.
But,
I don't,
I ask for forgiveness,
But I know it never comes.
Truly.
Regret always fills my heart.
But,
I can't make time go back.
I wish, I knew.
I wish, I were invisible.
I wish I did know why.
I wish, I was not me.
I wish I didn't know me,
I wish, I did not.
But,
I don't,
Always know.
Never may know.
Forgiveness, I need it.
My happiness, I need it.
But happiness can be taken away.
I wish I did not know myself.
When I do bad stuff.
When I disrespect.
I hate it.
The way I don't,
Know why.
I know,
Myself!
