He can change~ Monty&Winston- 13 reasons why fanfic

Chapter 4: You're starting to realize

Disclaimer- Hey guys welcome back to another chapter! I'm glad you loved the cliff hanger with Tyler, I definitely feel like this will bring some character development for Monty! So for this chapter expect to see Monty learn his mistakes and works on himself as a person struggling with interniliazrd homophobia and what he did to Tyler.

Monty's POV; My eyes drifted towards Tyler, his eyes still full of fear but somehow managed to still find himself being strong, but for a moment Tyler hesitated to sit across from me but gained courage to do it anyways.

"What are you fucking doing here? Shouldn't you be celebrating with Jensen and your asshole friends watching me suffer being pinned of my best friends murder?" He rolled his eyes slowly watching me with caution "no I'm not, plus you and I both know that's not the only reason your suffering in jail! You remember don't you..? What you did..?" I could tell his voice had begun to shake slightly as he had mentioned about what I did, without Tyler knowing I would end up glancing down at the concrete floor but looked back at Tyler, hiding my shallow feeling of guilt

"Yes.. I know what I did to you.. how could I ever forget that shit..?" I murmured quietly but loud enough for Tyler to hear it. "Then tell me Monty, why did you do this..? Why did you rape me..?" I swallowed the lump deep inside me "I don't fucking know.. I was just so pissed off.. you ruined shit for us.. and I guess I let the wrath of my own anger take over, letting no precautions take full responsibility for my actions, and I allowed myself to lose control of myself.."

My eyes moved from him then downward to the ground "and trust me, I do regret the hell I put you through.." I added as Tyler scoffed in offense at my words "Do you..? Is that why you threatened to do it again..? And is that why you continued to harass me over and over..?" The question played in my mind continuously "I didn't know then but I do now"

"And that's just supposed to make it better, is it?"
"No it doesn't, but I want you to know I'm starting to realize all the pain I cost"
"Bullshit Monty, I don't think you've begun to understand the suffering I've endured to get where I am, It took talking, getting help and finally speaking up to get through the shit that you had put me through.."
"Your right, I have no idea what I put you through, I don't know how much pain I'd put you through all these months, but I want you know I'm fucking sorry for the mistakes I've made, I'm sorry for letting myself become so fucked up just to ruin your life.. for everything I put you through.. I truly am sorry.."

As silence echoed through the visitation room, I had felt myself become astonished by my own words, for months I haven't suspect myself to apoglize to him, I normally would just move on from it, tell him to stop remembering the painful moments and just get over it, but the truth was I felt myself feeling guilty not just because of Winston but because for myself, deep within myself I wished I never ruined Tyler's fucking life but it's too late.. I already had..

for a moment I noticed Tyler look at me unknowingly like I couldn't sense what he was thinking until he finally spoke "Okay.. I-I forgive you.. but please leave me alone.. after this.."
"I guess I can do that, but before you go, I want you to know I'm glad that you were able to confront me like this, I know I wouldn't have, and I know I fucked things up for you but again I'm sorry man, just wanted you to know that" he nodded "it's o-okay, but I want you to realize that I'm not the only person who you affected, there's others, hell you even affected yourself, and I really want you to reflect and learn from your mistakes, and maybe just maybe, the world will you let change like I did." He then disappeared as I was sent back to my cell.