2 AM - thoughts

happiness

(hap·pi·ness /ˈhapēnəs/
noun - the state of being happy)

People always talk about how happy they are.

They're happy because they just lost their virginity at the age of 15—though, I am not sure if you should be happy about this—or because they just won the lottery, or maybe because they just turned 21. There are a lot of reasons that make people happy.

But do those reasons really make us happy? Does getting a new car really make you happy? Does finishing a homework before the deadline make you happy?

Happiness isn't something that lasts for a day, a week, or a month. It doesn't last for a year either. It might won't last for an eternity, but everytime your memory takes you back to that time, it will awake the butterflies in your tummy, and it simply will make you happy. Happiness is... things that you could do over and over again and you would still feel content.

For me, happiness is that first sip of your tea in the morning. The slightly bitter taste blends with the sweetest milk you could find (because go to hell, diabetes), slowly wakes your taste buds, ready for your Nutella toasts. Happiness is being true to yourself, admitting that sometimes you do things wrong, and you can always fix it—and learn from it. Happiness is saying sorry. Happiness is reading a nice book in a rainy day, with a cup of hot chocolate (with marshmallows), and instrumental music playing in the background; barely audible.

For me, happiness is meeting your online best friend. The tears of joys and the endless hugs and the screaming of their name on the top of your lungs make it special. Happiness is sneaking out of the house at 12 am to meet your boyfriend in your backyard. You in your favourite Disney-themed pyjamas and hair tied in a messy bun and barefaced, no evidence of eyeliners or mascara in your eyes anymore; him in your favourite shirt of his, wrapped in his comfortable vanilla scent that lingers for 6 hours on your clothes. Doing nothing but gazing at the dark night sky, lying there in the comfortable silence with your hands intertwined. Happiness is walking down the isle in your father's arm. Right when the door opens, the music starts playing, and right when you see your love of your life's most beautiful, most sincere smile. Happiness is saying I love you's after fighting over the most stupid little things with your lover.

Happiness is those moments that replay in the back of your mind, without you even realising it.