beautiful

the space dyke has feelings

"Hey, Caddie! Damian wants to skip lunch and hang in the choir room to practice. You in?" Janis asks, smiling at Cady.

Cady shivers harder. "Y-yeah. Sounds great."

"Dude, you're freezing. Here," Janis says, taking off her jacket.

"No, Janis. I'm okay it's fine," Cady argues. But Janis has already wrapped her jacket around Cady.

"Nope. You're literally like ice and I don't think that's good. So, wear it," Janis smiles.

Cady's face flushes, slowly putting the jean jacket that is covered in patches and paint splatters on her small body.

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As Cady practices her material, Janis watches her in awe. But Damian is watching Janis as she practically drools over Cady. He plops down next to her.

"Nice drool, you art freak," Damian whispers, trying to hold back a giggle.

"Oh shut up," Janis whispers back.

"Admit it. You like her," Damian smiles.

"And if I do?" Janis questions.

"You act like I would tell her. Not my place and I'm not getting into the middle of your relationship. I'm already in with Aaron," Damian smiles.

"Wait, Aaron as in Aaron Samuels?" Janis smirks.

"Yes but that is not the topic right now. Spill your guts," Damian glares.

"Fine! I like her, okay? Now, can you please keep your mouth shut?" Janis rolls her eyes, pushing Damian.

"Okay, okay damn. Calm your tits," Damian chuckles.

They both turn back and watch Cady, in awe of her talent.

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Cady and Damian meet up after school for their call backs. Damian got a call back for Ram Sweeney. They both help each other with their material, Cady's nerves slowly building. She takes a few deep breaths as Damian tells her to. He could see her nerves slowly taking over and he couldn't let that happen.

And now, it's her time. She grips on to Janis's jacket harder as she walks into the room.

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There's already a boy in there when she walks into her call back.

"Hi, Cady. This is Aaron Samuels. He will be auditioning for JD. He's going to run your audition with you to show chemistry," Mr. Stephan smiles.

Cady smiles and nods, shaking Aaron's hand.

It felt as though no time went by. She had sang both songs and ran the scene with Aaron. Before she knew it, her call back was over.

"Great job, Cady. The cast list will be posted tomorrow morning, outside of the choir room," Mr. Stephan smiles.

"Thank you," Cady smiles, walking out and sending Damian in.

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Janis is at home, having a complete breakdown. She doesn't understand how she could fall for a girl like Cady. She has always pushed away her sexuality, the fear of having to accept it scaring her more than anything.

You're the reason your dad left. He wouldn't want a dyke of a daughter. Cady won't want to be with you. Stupid fucking space dyke. No one wants to be friends with the space dyke. Space dyke. Space dyke. Space dyke.

Janis lets out a small sob, letting her thoughts control her. Her phone starts going off like crazy. Texts from Cady.

My call back went great!

Want to come over?

I'm really bored.

But Janis lets her thoughts control her. She shuts off her phone, curling up in her bed, small sobs escaping her every once in a while.

A small knock comes from the other side of her door.

She quickly wipes away her tears, "Come in."

The door opens, revealing her 11 year old sister, Holly. "I heard you crying. Can I help, Janie?"

Janis doesn't say anything, only nodding her head. Holly closes the door behind her as she walks into Janis's room. She climbs into Janis's bed, wrapping her small arms around Janis. Janis lets out her tears, hugging her little sister.

"What's wrong, Janie?" Holly asks.

Janis wants to answer, but she can't. Her thoughts take her over, making sure her mouth stays shut. And it does. Whether Janis likes it or not.