Dysfunctional

VI

Song | Pillar of Truth 
Lucy Dacus

Your hands are folded / Your eyes are closing

Your words are broken
Your eyes are dry

I am weak looking at you
A pillar of truth
Turning to dust

I am weak looking at you
A pillar of truth
Turning to dust

"How old were you?"

"When?"

"The first time you knew life was going to eat you alive."

"What is it about recon at one in the morning that makes you so poetic?" Jason laughed into the headset.

Helena grinned, "come on answer the question, you wanted to play."

"When I said lets pay 20 questions I meant lets have phone sex or something at 1am not 'Helena dig into my deepest traumas at 1am.'"

Helena rolled her eyes to nobody as dramatically as she could. She was currently hiding at the penguin's club. She sat on a beam on the ceiling watching penguin's goons carry in duffel bags of either cash or coke. Yet to be determined contraband she and jason were going to steal. They weren't exactly on a mission, they were just out having fun. Yes- this was fun for them, a hobby for the bat couple of the year.

"We need to talk about what happened yesterday."

Jason sighed at her tone. Serious. "Tim and Steph really waste no time do they."

"They're just concerned Jason."

"Yeah, alright." He grumbled as he thought about what had happened last night.
/ / / /

Jason paced back and forth in Helena's bedroom. She was supposed to be home an hour ago and was still nowhere to be seen. She wasn't answering her phone either. He could go downstairs and ask, Bruce had arrived hours ago and he knew some of the batkids had to be down there too. Yes, everyone knew Jason had taken residence in the manor months ago, but that didn't mean he was ready to confront them. He knew getting into an argument with Bruce (and probably punching Grayson in the face) would make Helena upset. She was already dealing with so much and the last thing Jason was going to do is cause her more unnecessary stress. But where was she?

His pacing was turning into loud stomping because apparently that was going to send her a message to come home soon.

Given their line of work, this wasn't odd. They were out fighting crime in masks for god's sake, worrying came with the job. Jason knew he was being irrational, he knew he didn't have to worry that she would be home soon. But all of that didn't change the fact that if he closed his eyes for too long he could see his hands skimming along the lines of her scars, could hear her sobs at night. The ones that hit after three in the morning, the ones she wasn't awake for. Jason hated a lot of things, wished for so many things to come to an end, but the one at the top of his list was for Helena to stop crying in her sleep. So he paced with his eyes wide open staring at the window in front of him and then the wall behind him, only blinking when his eyes started to sting. He looked crazy and he felt worse. The fear of something terrible happening nowhere near irrational in grimy old gotham.

Jason jumps back into a defensive position when the door suddenly bursts open. "Can you calm down for once in your life, jesus christ. You do realize we can't keep pretending the stomping upstairs is a dog right?" Stephanie glares at him, no actual malice in her stare or words.

"Sorry I just-"

"Yeah I know. Can you sit down for second." She walks over to the bed and pats the spot next to her.

Jason sighs walking over and sitting down, automatically letting his shoulders slump.

"I know you get worried, it's understandable. We all do." Stephanie and Tim were the only ones who didn't pretend he wasn't here, even Alfred sighed in annoyance at the upstairs dog after six pm. Not them though, no they came into this room as if the unlocked door was an open invitation for company any time of the day. "You can't keep making all this racket and think that Grayson isn't going to come in here one day."

Jason scoffed, "You know I couldn't give a rat's ass what he thinks or does."

Of course Stephanie knew. Everyone knew. But no one wanted to see what would happen when they finally met face to face. What was going to happen when Dick finally built up the courage to climb the stairs to Helena's room? No one was ready for the destruction this would ensure. Things were just starting to get better again between all of them.

The door opened again making both of them jump. Jason wanted it to be Helena and Stephanie prayed it wasn't Dick.

"I brought a snack for our loud and impatient furry friend." Tim entered the room a sandwich in hand along with some water.

"A sandwich? For a dog, Tim?" Stephanie just stared at him.

"What, everyone knows its a lie anyways." Tim handed the food to Jason who thanked him and started eating as if he had never eaten before, as if this was the best sandwich he has ever had. He didn't realize how hungry he was, with all the anxiety built up in the pit of his stomach.

"Um, Jason when was the last time you ate?" Tim asked worriedly.

"Don't remember, just know i'm starving."

Stephanie got up and headed towards the door, "I'll go down and bring more food okay, sit tight."

"I'll wait up with you alright, lets watch a movie yeah?" Tim smiled.

Jason didn't know why Tim and Steph were so kind to him. God knows his first encounter with Tim Drake was anything but. Yet here they both were, making sure he ate and willing to keep him company while he waited for his girlfriend to come through their window. Jason was grateful, and for the second time in his life didn't feel lonely.