The Struggle For Love ✔

Chapter 7 - Change

"That isn't easy, Cris." He turns a bit to look at me. "They did stuff that isn't okay. Not just to Maxie, but to me too."

"Like?" I ask, hesitantly because I knew before something happened to Oliver that he isn't sharing with anyone. "What did they do to you?"

Oliver is silent for a couple of seconds, but then he forcefully shakes his head. "I don't want to talk about it." He pulls away from my hold, crawling away from me a bit. "And we shouldn't have slept together. This can never happen again."

I swallow hard, taking him in from the small distance in between us, fiddling with the cover of the bed, only now realising we're both still naked.

And I've cheated.

Though I'm not sure if anyone could consider it cheating since I'm not even sure if my boyfriend is still alive. Or ever coming back if he is alive.

Should I feel guilty, or is this an understandable event?

More important, would Finnley understand?

"We have to be at the club in an hour." Oliver pats my shoulder, wipes away the last tears, and with that it's as if nothing is wrong.

I frown, watching him parade in his Adam's costume while he's searching for clean underwear to wear.

I guess we're really going to pretend nothing is wrong, since we do have to be at the club in an hour and we still have to stop by at Oliver's house to grab his stuff.

And then I can't help but wonder if Oliver has a break-down more often, in the moments I'm not there to witness them. Only to recover because he has a commitment to for fill, like soccer or school.

And I can't help but wonder if Finnley knows Oliver's biggest secret.

And if it's only a matter of time for Oliver to open up to me and tell me what it is that is actually bothering him more then Maxie's death and the previous taunting in high school.

What's behind Oliver's alcoholism?

* * * * *

We won the game, and this time it's mostly thanks to Oliver's brilliant game. He scored once from a penalty, once by taking a free kick, and he stopped practically all attempts from our opponent to score a goal. Since he's made man of the match, there's not drinking half a litre of beer and I'm holding onto his arm, squeezing it gently to tell him I'm here, and to remind him to be strong and really not do this.

He simply stares towards the table, ignoring some looks from other people in the canteen – our team knows exactly why Oliver doesn't drink, but not everybody is aware of that fact.

"Just say no, just be strong."

"I am," he hisses, taking a couple of seconds to advert his gaze and look at me. "I am saying no, ain't I?" He pulls away from his hold and after grabbing his jacket, he leaves the canteen and heads outside.

I bite my lip, feeling highly awkward. Oliver has been on edge and cranky all day. It made him play even better then usual, but it's not great for our friendship. Or any of his social interactions. I don't think he shared any decent words with anyone today.

"Is he okay?" Sam leans towards me with a frown of his own. "He's been a beet grumpy."

"Well, he did end his sobriety streak of over two years for one night of stupid fun. And I'm not even sure if he had that much fun. I think he's been crying most of the time."

"Because of... Finn?"

"No, and not Maxie either. It's something he won't tell me, and I'm not sure how to handle it. And to make matters worse, I did something incredibly stupid."