Saving Her ~Fillie~

|4|

Warning: cutting

Millie

Finns mouth collided into mine and moved in sync. I've never kissed a boy and I can't believe on what I've missed out on. It was like we were in our own little world and it felt nice. I felt loved and being loved felt way too good, which is why I pulled away and ran.

I ran and ran until I barely could anymore. I looked back and didn't see his house, which was good

Finn treated me like I was something, somebody. He didn't treat me like dirt and gray water.

I really liked Finn and that was what I was scared of. Finn is the most popular guy in school and I'm nothing. Literally nothing

I didn't wanna end of on bad terms but I didn't move to quickly. Everyone would hate me even more than they already did.

I just wanted, no, needed a friend. Not a boyfriend at the moment. I wouldn't be able to take any more pain. I go into my house realizing I left my backpack at Finns house. I had nothing to do tomorrow but clean, and by clean, I mean really clean, so I'll have to get it Monday

I lie down and try to gather my thoughts together but I eventually fall asleep

Monday~ School~ Lunch~ Millie

I walk into the cafeteria and make my way slowly towards Finns table. He has been avoiding me all day and hasn't let me say a word to him

I hope he wasn't mad because of the kiss. I told him it wasn't the kiss and I needed a break, but not from our friendship. The main thing I need right now is friendship

I sit down and look down. I was getting better at keeping my head up but obviously now I wasnt really wanted to be seen

Gaten stares at me with large eyes as if I did something

"I'm gonna go get something to eat now I guess" I whisper lowly

I get up and make my way into the lunch line which was practically empty

"He's never been rejected before" says Sadie who startled me because I didn't even know she was behind me

"I didn't reject him" I say and grab my tray

She raised her eyebrows and steals an ice-cream when the lunch lady wasn't looking

She does a dramatic turn and mocks Finn "I can't believe she rejected me! Her beautiful brown eyes looked at me ran. Ohh how will I ever get over such an amazing beautiful girl!?!" She says loudly and I can't help but smile a little

Did he really act like that?

I leave my tray on the counter and walk up back to Finn's table where Sadie was just eating her stolen ice cream

"Can we talk Finn?" I ask lowly

All of a sudden Noah pops out of nowhere with a huge hickey on his neck, "what'd I miss?"

"Alot" says Sadie

Finn gets up and walks outwards the door and here we are, standing in the hallway

"Why are you avoiding me?" I say

"Why would I not?" He says sarcastically

"It's not a time to be sarcastic Finn. Im serious!"

He rolls his eyes which hurts me a bit

"What happened to our friendship?" I say quietly on the verge of tears

We got along so great. We had an amazing connection and I didn't want that to leave.

"That kiss, Millie! That kiss"

"That kiss was nothing. It meant nothing Finn!" I say. Pain and hurt flashes in his eyes and I can't believe I just lied like that. That kiss was everything to me

Finn

"That kiss was nothing. It meant nothing Finn!"

I hear my heart break a little as those words escape her mouth. I've kissed plenty of girls before but none made me feel the way Millie made me feel.

"You mean nothing Millie! I fucking hate you. I can't believe I let you ruin my reputation.I just felt bad for you! Felt bad you get picked on in the hallways, felt bad you ate lunch alone, felt bad you were a nobody. But guess what, your still a nobody. You'll always be a nobody"

Millie

I felt my heart get ripped into a million pieces. Tears escape my eyes and Finn walks away leaving me. I start sobbing and I couldn't feel my hands, or my feet, but somehow I felt pain. Pain from every part of my body

My hands and lips were trembling and I fall to my knees. He left me, he hated me. The first person I felt safe with, and I could trust, my first friend, and my first love, hated me.

I got up and ran out of school. I ran into my bathroom and slammed the door shut. I slide down the door sobbing and trying to get these horrible thoughts out of my head. I couldn't think straight and I just wanted to be numb, which is why I grabbed my blade, and slowly started to cut

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sorry this was so depressing BUTTTTT it gets better so yeahhhh

Much love❤️