FALLEN (NOW PUBLISHED ON AMAZON)

6.

"Not when you aremaking fun of the guy.  You don't know him."  Saying that, I know I just set him off.  He is boiling inside, I see it in the vein popping on his neck and the meanness in his eyes.  I instinctively feel scared, but I try to own my grounds.  I'm done surrendering to him when he is being mean.

"And you do?   Have you seen his hair falling on his face like a girl, it was a joke."  He rolls his eyes at me and leaves the room.

I sit on the bed and try to compose myself.  That was sexist and I really can't stand it.  It quickly makes me think of Marcel.  It makes me smile that he is a proud feminist and so upfront about equality and actively fighting for it.  He bloody dedicated all his thesis on it.  He is freaking remarkable.  He seems so kind and wonderful compared to my boyfriend.  Boyfriend...

It has been a long time since something like that happened.  He bullied me all my life, I was the crazy one to choose to give him a chance when he was suddenly infatuated by me.  I'm the masochistic woman who tolerates to stay in a relationship with a man who treats me like that.  It's all I have ever known.  For four years, almost five, I lived with it, thinking I was the problem.  He might be really sweet when he wants, but now that he seems to bully me again, I don't want to take the risk that he gets used to treat me like that again, more often than he already does.

He leaves me in the room alone and I'm very glad.  I get to feel my emotions freely.

I breathe in and out, taking a seat on the bed, and press my palms on my eyes to stop myself from crying.  I mustn't, I have nowhere to hide here.  I need to go back out there and face what I have done and see if they told or will tell Steeve about last weekend.  I can't imagine the wrath of anger that will come upon me when I do break up with him.

Oh my God...

I get up and collect myself.  I breathe in and out again and exit the room.  I swipe my thumbs under my eyes just in case, one last time, and walk in the living room.  I look at them, awkwardly sitting on their couches, Sophie and Lucas together and Ash and Stee each have their own.

I can hear the little devil in my head asking me which one will I choose to sit next to.  After what just happened and for all the reasons in the world, I want to sit next to Ash, but I must do what is expected of me and head to Steeve. I know if I don't he'll get angry at me again.

"Why don't you come sit with me?"  The beautiful sound of the drummer's voice comes to my ears.  "If you are going to live here, we are better to get to know each other right now."  He smirks at me, his hazel eyes piercing mine as I welcome his invitation more than he knows how.

I step towards him and sit dangerously close, not enough to draw any suspicions, but enough to feel the warmth of his body against mine.  He puts his arm on the back of the couch behind me before he starts his interrogation.

"We were talking about going to the pub tonight."  Sophie tells, but I'm more focused on the whispered voice in my ear.

"So? You have a boyfriend?"  Ashley asks and I feel my heart sink to my heels.  It barely knows me so literally the only thing he knows  is that I'm unfaithful.

"I do."  I respond, trying my best to be subtle.

"And you kissed me?"  He says as if I was a mean person, when I'm actually just stuck in a poisoned relationship.

"I didn't.  You kissed me and I was drunk."  I slightly turn my head to him, to make sure nobody sees or hears us.

"What about the texts?"  He asks and I feel a sweetness in his voice and I can't help but to remember all the excitement he made me feel and I still feel.  I need to be truthful.