Black Rose

Postlude.

I lifted Aurelia up more to my hip since she began to slide down due to the lilac silk dress she was excited to wear.

"Are you ready?" Baylor beamed.

"I'm nervous!" I admitted with a breathy laugh.

"You've been waiting for this moment all your life," Baylor stated. "Being nervous is okay, but don't allow that to mess you up or make you not enjoy the opportunity. Who knows how many times this will happen? I pray it'll be a normal thing for you, but for now treat it as if it's an once in a lifetime opportunity. Live in the present."

My small smile slowly disappeared. "How can I live in the present when I'll be talking about my past?"

"Majesty," Baylor sighed, "I-"

"I got this," A deep voice interrupted.

Quickly turning around, I was met by Javier. He had a sympathetic smile on his face. With a small nod, Baylor dismissed herself, giving Javier and I a moment.

"Hey Relia," Javier spoke in his little kid voice, "how 'bout you go ask Ria for a juice box and play with your dolls for a few minutes, okay?"

"Okay." She nodded quickly, desperate to get out of my arms. With a small chuckle, I carefully placed her on the ground and watched as she ran down the dark hall.

"You good?" Javier inquired with a cocked eyebrow.

I gave a small shrug and looked elsewhere. "Usually I'm fine," I admitted. I met Javier soft, dark eyes. "I don't know if it's different this time because this is so important and will be... huge; or if it's the fact today is the eighth of November." I could feel the tears stinging the brim of my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Not because I was afraid to cry over him, but because in a few minutes I'll have at least a million people watching my every move. Lucky for me, only a few thousand were actually here. The rest of the people will be watching from televisions. "He'd be thirty five today Javier..."

"Look," he sighed, "I know you're beginning to regret scheduling this on his birthday, but you gotta realize you chose this date for a reason. You knew this would be the opportunity for these people to see the real you. To feel you."

Fanning my eyes, I nodded. "You're right, you're right."

"He can't hurt you anymore Majesty."

He's right. He's absolutely right. Alex can't hurt me anymore. He's gone, and he's been gone for about five years now. There's not a day that goes by where I don't think of him. I see him in Aurelia; looks wise. As a baby and toddler she used to look like me, but it's as if I blinked and now she's a split image of him. I still don't know if that's necessarily a good or bad thing, but what I do know is that I still love him. I can never stop loving him.

If it's real love, it'll never truly go away.

Despite everything, I love him and I know he loves me. The ones who think of me as an idiot, they just don't understand love. Love never disappears.

After thanking Javier and giving him a tight hug, my confidence had gone up. It was just on time also because my names as called and the clapping and cheering had begun. I inhaled slowly, and exhaled even slower.