Don't Say (Coming Down Sequel) [G-Eazy]

Chapter II

A/N: Alright, so unfortunately, updates will probably slow down from here on out as I have to go back to uni on Thursday. With that said, I am going to try and at least get an update out here and there, but it's not going to be very consistent because I'm terrible at balancing schoolwork and writing haha. Please vote/comment if you are enjoying this so far! I think I've got a pretty good idea of how I want the plot for this to go, so we'll see how it pans out. Thank you all for reading! x

G's POV

"God fucking damnit," I chucked my phone onto the coffee table, running a hand through my hair.

"What did you expect, honestly," Marty spoke.

I shook my head. "I... I don't know. I can't deal with knowing that I hurt her."

Remembering how she was on the verge of tears made me so mad at myself.

He exhaled, not saying anything for quite awhile. "You fucked up real bad, G."

"I know I did. I can't fucking lose her. I can't," I was almost frantic at this point. The thought of it alone made me sick to my stomach. I hated myself for the way I was acting, and I hated even more that I hadn't noticed that she was upset with me before. I was so selfish and caught up with the partying that I hadn't even stopped for a second to consider her feelings, and when she finally got fed up with me I still made it about myself. What the fuck was wrong with me?

"Uh, well, I'd say you've already done that," he pointed out.

My breathing rate increased as I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to calm down. The thought of it being over made me want to cry, and I almost hated that she made me feel that way. Relationships never made me emotional, but then again I'd never really been in one quite like the one I'd had with Elena.

"I know, it's just... Fuck. I really don't know how to do this relationship shit. I've never loved anyone besides her, ever, let alone loved someone nearly as much as I love her..." I trailed off, exhaling. "Fuck, I'm an idiot."

He shook his head, a single chuckle falling from his lips. "You said it, not me. Maybe you should have been proving that when you were with her."

"I know," I said again. "Things got really fucking serious really fast and I got fucking scared. It's stupid. And I'm so caught up in all the partying and shit that I didn't even realize that she was..." I trailed off, shaking my head. The relationship I had with Elena had terrified me from the start, and I think that was partly what led to us breaking up.

Breaking up. I still had a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that it was actually over. It just didn't seem like it could be real.

"You need to give her some space, G. I think you know that," Marty advised. "The last thing you want to do is set her off. She's already hella pissed at you."

"Yeah, I guess," I responded. "I can't give up on us. I... I need her. God, this is fucking ridiculous. When have I ever cared this much?"

He laughed. "Loving someone isn't a bad thing. You just have to stop being such a pussy about it. Give her time, then talk to her."

"Yeah," I muttered.

"Oh, and don't make it all about you," he added. "You're the one who fucked up, not her, remember."

I sighed, getting up off his couch. "Uh huh. I think I'm gonna go home."

"Don't do anything stupid," he spoke. "Just leave her alone, okay? You'll make shit worse."

"Yep," I was only half-listening to him at this point as I retrieved my phone off his table before going over to his door, opening it.

I knew I was going to end up trying to contact her again. There was no way I was giving up that easily.

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I arrived back at my apartment, sticking my key in the lock before pushing the door open. Once I pulled it shut, I looked down at my phone. Still nothing from Elena, not that this was surprising. My gaze flickered to the time on my phone, seeing that she had had plenty of time to get back to Pasadena, so at this point she was just ignoring me. I couldn't really blame her, and I guess I deserved it to some extent.

I made my way into the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of whiskey and beginning to drink it straight from the bottle. I almost laughed at the irony of it all; my excessive drinking and partying was really what caused all of these problems in the first place. Maybe she was right. Maybe I wouldn't ever change.

The alcohol in my system was only giving me more incentive to try and contact Elena. I was well aware that I should leave her alone, but I couldn't help it. I called her multiple times, becoming more and more hopeless each time I got her answering machine. I sent out a few texts, and I hated myself for getting so desperate. I just needed to know that she was okay, even though it was pretty clear when she left that she wasn't.

The alcohol was beginning to make me feel hazy, and before I knew it I passed out on the couch. It wasn't until I woke up the next morning that I finally received a text from Elena about an hour prior.

I almost felt like throwing up as I read it: G, please, please just stop. Stop calling me, stop texting me. Just don't. I need time right now and you're making it harder on me. I really wanted us to work but you hurt me. I thought maybe you'd changed but you've made it pretty clear that's not ever going to happen and that fucking hurts because I love you so much. I want to be with you more than anything but I can't do it. Not with how things are now. Please don't respond to this. I didn't even want to text you back but you've got to stop. Goodbye G.

As I finished reading her message over a second time, I almost texted her back, but I stopped myself. She was right, and I knew if I did it would just make her even angrier at me. I knew deep down she would be so much better off without me, but I needed her.

Maybe I had fucked things up beyond repair. Maybe I needed to accept the fact that I'd already lost her and I should let go. I just didn't know how I was supposed to do it.