the pair arrived to a nearby Italian restaurant, ilarias favourite as it makes her feel close to home. ilaria ordered a spaghetti and alex ordered a lasagne, basic but the pair was both craving pasta. they enjoyed there meals making small talk and discussing up coming video ideas.
"alex, come on!" the girl laughed, "no. i am not letting you put make up on me." he replied in a stern voice. "come on! your my best friend!" she replied, alex paused for a second, almost like he realised something, ilaria brushed it off, "okay fine, ill think about it." he huffed.
the hungry pair consumed their food more quickly than usual. alex payed even though ilaria insisted, he was more successful than ilaria but the pair didn't even take that in account. they gave a vast tip and made their way to alex's car.
ilaria studied the boy who was focussed on the road, examining his side profile and clear skin, the exact place his moles were dotted. "this isn't the way home?" ilaria said, confused. "i know, i want to show you something first." the boy smiled looking at the girl.
they pulled up into an empty parking lot. ilaria was baffled, she had never seen this place before. "come on" alex grinned, grabbing her hand and leading the way. the boy lead the girl into a beautiful beach.
the beach was different from the other one's ilaria had seen. the whisper of the winds and the rhythmic sound of waves created a natural harmony. the sand was a powdery white with a golden hue interspersed with fragments of corals. the sunset over the horizon engulfed the world in fiery reds and deep purples. the calm sea was serene and inviting. the atmosphere was tranquilising. the girl was lost for words.
taking a seat in the sand and lying back examining the sunset, whilst alex lay close. the pair felt like they were the only two people on the world. "why have you never taken me here before?" the girl whispered with a sense of disbelief in her tone. "i wanted to wait for the right time." alex responded quietly.
the girl sat up curiously, "what do you mean?" she asked, to which alex sat up to. "ilaria i need to tell you something." he responds in a serious tone. the girl furrowed her eyebrows, "sure alex, you can tell me anything" she smiled gently.
the boy cleared his throat. "ilaria, i love you."
ilaria paused for a moment, "alex, you know i love you too." she replied, slightly confused. "no ilaria, i am in love with you" he paused for a moment, unable to meet eyes with the girl, he fiddled with his fingers. "i love you and everything about you. your personality, your jokes, your creativity, your hair, your style, your smartness, your face and most of all your smile."
the girl sat there dumbfounded, at a loss of words, she didn't know what to do or what to say. before she had a chance to even open her mouth, alex who was already close to her as it was tucked a hair gently behind her ears.
ilaria didn't want it to be like this, she didn't want to hurt alex that was the last thing she wanted to do. but she knew she wasn't in the right mental state for whatever this was, not with jack being in the picture. ilaria knew she wasn't good for alex, he deserved someone better, someone who could love him naturally.
"alex" she whispered, the boy looked up at the girl hopefully, however the girl was unable to meet his eyes. "i'm sorry" she continued. "what?" he questioned, tone of surprise in his voice. "you know deep down i cant be the perfect girl for you, let alone be one you deserve." there was a moment of silence, "i love you alex, i really do with all my heart, but please dont pick me, out of everyone please.. just not me."
the statement was followed by another short moment of silence, "i.. i dont understand." he said turning his head away from the girl and looking out into the horizon. "i need to know how to love my self before i even think about how to properly love somebody, especially someone so special to me."
"okay." alex said quietly, standing up and brushing the sand of him, before briskly making his way up to the car. shortly after, ilaria did the same, she felt an overwhelming feeling of guilt and hurt but she knew it was the right thing to do.
she got in the passenger seat of alex's car and he pulled away, ilaria studied the sunset one last time before he swiftly drove off. for the first time maybe ever in the friendship, an awkward silence lingered around in the atmosphere of the car. barely any words were exchanged through the journey just a faint, "thankyou" from ilaria to which alex just hummed back, she wished more than anything they would stay friends.
