where's our love? | Charles Leclerc ff

Chapter 6 - Anxiety

"Thank you again" I said and hugged him tightly. He was surprised at first, but returned the hug warmly before we parted ways.

--------------------------------------------

The sun by the sea slowly descended into the horizon as I lay here on my sunbed by the pool, comfortably reading my book.

The soft sounds of the sea soothe me and the light stroking of my hip by a certain racer causes a tingling in my stomach.

He lies between my legs, with his head on the side of my stomach and his arms clasping the lower part of my torso.

Gently he keeps stroking the sides of my hips with his thumb and gently I keep stroking him through his perfect hair.

It's soft and still a mess from the pool earlier.

I feel him straighten his head and look up at me, the next moment he takes my book from my hands and puts it aside.

He pulls me down a little further so that I am also lying on the sun bed and supports himself with his elbows on the sides of my head.

"Tes yeux sont magnifiques" (Your eyes are beautiful) he says and strokes a strand behind my ear. I smile and look at his lips.

They are still slightly shiny because he just ran his tongue over them and they look so damn soft.

He moved his head down a little further so he could kiss my neck.

This he continued down my cheekbones to my temple.

He looked at me again urgently before placing his lips on mine.

I open my eyes full of energy. My heart raced and I felt that familiar tingle again.

It was impossible.

This couldn't happen now.

| 10 April; Australia |

If you're honest with yourself, it's the best thing for yourself and everyone else around you. The world may become cruel and hard to bear, but you have to learn the truth for yourself. In a gentle or hard way. It happens to everyone at some point.

The sun was already bright on the horizon, but for some inexplicable reason I just sat there.

Completely ready for the race, but now I'm sitting here staring into the void. Into this damned emptiness.

It was so quiet, only the knocking on my door could be heard.

"I know you're there, Pauline" the person says loud and clear and I look at the door of the room. It was closed, but the knocking came again and again. The person was persistent, impossible to break, but eventually he fell silent.

I thought I had finally driven them away with my silence, scared them away and finally had my peace to sink into my thoughts. I thought that I could now hide from everyone and not feel those eyes on me. But after only a few minutes there was a light knock on the door.

"Lil?" said the person and I looked at the door again. I didn't answer, just sat there quietly, expecting him to leave.

"It's me, Charles" he said again and I was still staring at the door.

"Open the door please" he says and I slowly stand up, as if hypnotised I slowly walk towards the door, put my hand on the lock and stop. I felt uneasy, if I opened that door I would feel all the hate from the people. The comments, the pictures, the rumours. All this and more.