Ghost of You

f o r t y

"No. No, no no-" 

"(Y/n)." Bucky tries to interject, grabbing the remote from my hand and silencing the TV. I don't care though. I'm too busy bending to the floor, hastily grabbing my cell phone from where I had dropped it. I left it up so I can see the screen. It's cracked in multiple places. 

I start to pace as I try to turn it on. 

"(Y/n)-"

"Come on. Come on." I mutter as I take a few steps to the left and then back the way I came. The screen turns on, but nothing looks right. The colors aren't showing the way they should, and no matter how many times I swipe my finger across the screen, nothing happens. The apps all refuse to open.  

"(Y/n)." Bucky gently takes the phone from my hand. He puts it down on the couch next to our  abandoned Scrabble game, then turns back to face me. 

"What are you doing? I have to try to call them, I have to figure out if they're okay." I tell him. 

There had to be a phone somewhere, or some other way to get in touch with them. Tony and Peter were trapped on a space ship headed god knows where. There had to be some other way to help them. 

"They're in space (Y/n)." Bucky says calmly. "Even if you had a phone the call wouldn't go through."

"Well there has to be something we can do." I insist, my voice sounding panicked. "Maybe the Wakandan's have a ship I can borrow, that seems like the kind of thing they might have."

I go to turn away from him, hoping I can talk to W'kabi or anyone else who might be able to help me, but Bucky reaches out, placing a hand on each of my arms and holding me in place. 

"Just wait and think about this for a second." He says. "Even if they did have a space ship, we have know idea where they are or where they're going. And it's not like either of us could get it off the ground, unless you have some sort of spaceship flying license you never told me about."

His voice is still so even, and so calm. I don't understand how he can be so calm about any of this. When I'd worried about all the things that could go wrong leaving Tony and Peter behind, I'd never imagined this. This is so much bigger than any situation I could have predicted. This wasn't Tony and Peter bickering about which functionalities of his spider-suit should be enabled. This was attack on New York big. This was aliens in freaking space big. And I have no idea how or what I can do to try and fix it. All I know is that I can't just stand here and do nothing while they're out there in danger.

"Well then I'll go back to New York." I suggest. "I can look around where the ship landed and try and find something about whoever took them or what they were after."

I turn to leave for a second time, only for his hand to come around my wrist, forcing me to look back at him.

"(Y/n)." 

So much is said in just that one word. All he said aloud was my name, but there's so much hidden beneath it. It's so powerful that it penetrates through the panic fogged thoughts to give me clarity, and gives way for the reality of the situation to sink in.

"He's just a kid." I whisper, voice wavering as if I'm imploring him for it not be true. Only he can't, because it is true, and nothing he can say will change the fact that there is an innocent teenager currently stuck on an alien ship headed for outer-space. 

"I know." He responds, quiet and full of sympathy. "I'm sorry."

I don't know if there's any more frustrating than the feeling of complete and utter uselessness. To know that there's someone out there that you care about who needs your help, but having no method to give them any. To have to sit there in concern and worry, nothing more. I'm so frustrated, so entirely defeated by my own helplessness to be any of aid.