Cursed | JJK | ✓

Loss

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Rea still remembered.

It had rained that day. The mist hung in the air and the sky a gloomy shade of grey as if even the skies were mourning for him. Rea stood watching, far away. But close enough to see them take him down to his grave.

The rain had drenched her and even in the shivering cold, she only watched in silence. She could still remember his smile. How his dimples sank deep into his cheeks when he smiled, and how his eyes would crinkle. In her mind's eye, he was smiling.

That same warm smile, as if to say everything will be alright.

But they won't be.

Not anymore.

5 days had passed since he left.

Rea had sat there by the windows for five days staring up at the melancholic skies. She didn't dare move. She couldn't.

All that was in her mind was a question.

Why?

Why him? What had he done? He was still so young.

Why not her?

On the sixth day, she decided that she wanted to see him again. Because she couldn't seem to move on. She just couldn't.

Rea still felt as if it were all a nightmare, and that she would wake up one day and he would be there smiling. But she never woke up.

She trudged through the muddy land into the rows of stones where stood his grave. But as she reached there, she was mildly surprised to find someone already there. Not wanting to disturb she quietly started to leave.

"Rea."

It was Jungkook. He had come to visit him. One lone stem of Lily was on his grave. He walked forward to her. Rea didn't want to talk. She didn't want to hear anyone else say that they were sorry. Because it meant nothing. It wouldn't change anything. Namjoon wouldn't come back. She took a step back. "Rea, I'm-"

She didn't wait. She ran. She seemed to be running a lot. For the past few weeks, that was all she had done. Run.

It was Deja vu all over again. She didn't know why nor where she was going. She only knows that she must run. So she ran.

She didn't expect him to follow her. She didn't expect him to even care, but he did. Jungkook caught up to her before she could vanish out of his sight and grasped her wrist. "Rea."

"Don't say that you're sorry. I don't want to hear it!"

"I won't." He replied, but he didn't let go of her hand, afraid that she might run off again.

"Rea... Are you alright?"

It seemed as though he knew that it was an absurd question. Yet he asked. Rea only nodded, if that's what he wanted. She just wanted him to let her go. Let her just run away. Because if he didn't she would break.

He held on obviously, not believing her. Rea was the kind of person who tended to hide their pains. The kind who'd rather burn alone. So he knew she wasn't okay. He could see it in her sunken eyes, that lost the life it once held. Jungkook exhaled, still staring down at her worried as her lips quivered.

Rea never once cried when she had heard about N.J. She didn't want to. But that day, she cried for the first time after his death. She broke down and Jungkook led her away.

Tears wouldn't cease once it began. The pain wouldn't go away. She thought could pretend that she was fine. She couldn't.

After what felt like hours, she had stopped crying. Jungkook was still there. He never spoke a word. he apologized, "I'm sorry I made you go through all... this."

She said, indicating to herself and Jungkook nodded. "It's alright. He was your best friend, I can understand how you would feel."

Rea nodded, "N.J was just always there for me. Whenever I needed him, he would always be there. I guess I took him for granted. I shouldn't have. I feel like this is a nightmare and that I would wake up and he would come smiling at me. I just... wish I could've told him how much he meant to me." There it was the tears again, and she felt herself crumbling down and Jungkook swiftly wrapped his arms around her. "Shhh... let it all out." He spoke rubbing soothing circles on her back, trying to calm her. "I'm sure N.J knew... how much he meant to you. I'm more than sure of that and even if you couldn't tell him, I know he must appreciate it."

Her sobs slowly subsided and Rea pulled back, her hands wiping away her tears. The rain had cleared up and the sunlight peaked in from the clouds above as Rea sat there wondering over his words.

"And... " Jungkook spoke up from beside her, "If you want, I can be there for you." He said, looking into her eyes.

"So don't cry. Let him go... You need to let him rest in peace. I know it's hard... but you have to."