I Went to Amsterdam Without You

Louis.

Louis was lying in bed in his apartment in London. He'd been trying to fall asleep for at least 3 hours now and he was getting more and more frustrated as the hours passed. He decided he had enough and might as well got up if he wasn't going to sleep. He grabbed his phone and saw it was 4 in the morning already. The lockscreen was filled with notifications, missed called and tons of emails. With a sigh he closed his phone again, he really didn't want to deal with all of these people wanting something from him. In fact he didn't want to deal with people at all.

Last week had been horrible, he'd spend all week in the studio with his band, but nothing really came together. He'd just felt empty and couldn't find any words to write. His team had him listen to some songs that were written by other songwriters, but he really didn't want to be that kind of an artist. He wanted to make his own music and at least cowrite his songs.

But lately it seemed like he just couldn't find any inspiration, his mind was blocked and all the sounds and melodies his band came up with just sounded wrong. Maybe it was because things weren't going well with Eleanor. The last few months their relationship had been a roller-coaster full of ups and downs, more downs if he was being honest. She seemed to rather spend her time in New York with her new stupid friends than to be around him.

He thinks she's avoiding him because lately things haven't been that nice when they were spending time together. It felt as if they were growing apart more and more. They always had dealt with the distance, ever since they started dating, but this time it was different. It seemed like all they did when they were together was argue or having empty sex. They barely spoke and they never had fun like they used to. He loved her, he really did but he started to wonder if it was changing to a different kind of love.

Eleanor had always been the one for him. They had been through so much together and she really knows him. Even after their break-up they got back together and it felt like they were meant to be together.

So why is everything so fucked up right now? Why do all we do is hate on each other and feel miserable, he thought.

He hadn't spoken to her in a week and their last conversation they said horrible things to each other. They had this huge fight about her staying in New York for another month and he asked her if she even wanted to be with him at all.

She didn't answer and they just stood there in silence, until she finally said that maybe they just needed some time apart. Maybe a break was good for them. So they could figure out if this was really what they still wanted.

He thought it was bullshit, they had broken up before so why would they do it again? He also knew there was nobody else out there who could ever put with him, all of him. All of his fucked up shit and al the baggage he carried. She was the only one who had been there from the start. But then again, what if she doesn't love him anymore? Does he even love her the way he did before? He wondered as he headed to the kitchen to make some tea.

He lived in a fancy apartment in the center London. It had big windows and was decorated by an architect in a clean modern way. He liked it, but never cared much to make it his own. Eleanor had bought some accessoires to add a more 'homey feeling' to it, but there were no pictures or any of his personal stuff there.

While he was adding some milk to his tea, he noticed the stack of papers laying on the counter. They were marketing plans and ideas for the album. His manager Ashley send them to him and pushed him to read it and make a plan of it. He got exhausted from just looking at it.

"Maybe I do need a break" Louis thought. Maybe I need a break, not just from Eleanor, but from everything.

Why wouldn't he just pack his things and go somewhere, to get away from everything. Just a break of about two weeks and do absolutely nothing but have a couple of pints in a bar where nobody knows him. No one around to bother him with calls and expectations or waking up at a ridiculous time. Maybe he could finally catch up with some sleep and just lay in bed for a day.

He liked this idea and decided to open his laptop and search for a good place to hide away to.

Maybe some island where he could just lay in the sun? He typed in "private island vacation", but laughed as soon as he saw the pictures. Who was he kidding? He wasn't the kind of lad who spend his day tanning on the beach all day. They probably couldn't even serve a good beer on a deserted island.

He thought about the last time he actually felt really happy and closed his eyes.

"Amsterdam!" he shouted.

He loved Amsterdam, it's such a great city. The people are down to earth and are always in for a party. Amsterdam wasn't that different from London which made him feel at home every time he was there. Another nice thing about the Netherlands was that people never seemed to get real crazy whenever they were around a celebrity.

Of course there were always a bunch of fans that somehow figured out where you're staying, but most people just walk you by and don't even seem to notice who you are. He sat in a rusty old bar with Eleanor in Amsterdam once and everybody thought they were just some regular couple and minded their own business. He really loved that about the Dutch.

Shit, he did went to Amsterdam with Eleanor before and he really doesn't want to be reminded of her while he's there. Maybe if he'd just went to a different part of town. A quieter place, just to experience a typical Amsterdam life.

He typed in "undiscovered part of Amsterdam".  He found a blog of a traveler that said: if you want to discover the real Amsterdam and avoid the busy touristic highlights, the east side is the place to go. This part of town has only been developing the last 6 years and is still pretty authentic. It's cultural diverse neighborhood has a lot of old markets, but also some new hot coffeeshops and vintage clothing stores. The east side is a lot quieter than the west side and the center and tourist are not often found around this part of town. Do you want to meet some locals and hide away from the crowd, this is the place for you.

"Perfect" Louis said, "as if they read my mind".

Maybe he shouldn't even go to a hotel if he didn't want to draw attention to himself. Maybe he should just rent an Airbnb and really live the local life. He opened Airbnb and started to search some places at the east part of town.

After looking at a few places he found a cute looking apartment. It was a typical Amsterdam building but the décor was quite modern. It was decent, not too large but not small either.

"Proper nice", Louis thought. Good enough for him to chill in and close enough to the amenities he needed, like a bar.

He made an account on the website and decided to use a fake name, but put a nice picture of himself on his profile. It seemed the apartment was owned by a lady who he guessed was in her 40's which was perfect, because that decreased the chance of her recognizing him.

He booked the apartment for two weeks, starting from the day after tomorrow. If he would leave tomorrow, actually it was tomorrow already, so if he would leave today and take his car with the boat he'd arrive just on time for the check in. He closed his laptop and started to pack his bag.