Until you call again. (Complete)

Wrecking ball.

From the moment he stopped the lift for me, my heart chose him without my knowledge.

He's probably the most annoying, most selfish person I've ever met. But of all my days of loving - Lord knows I've loved, it's never felt this way before. Not with Tristan, not with Luke. Not with anyone.

I've read stories and watched movies about how perfect that moment you meet him is supposed to be. I've always imagined how magical the moment would be for me too, because well, that's the picture that's always been painted. How you'll know when he's the one by how perfect the moment will be.

My first experience with him was the complete opposite of that. On the first day I met him, he spilled a very hot, hot chocolate on my chest. He also got me in trouble with my boss, yes I got a warning for that.

And then the first time we slept together, he practically chased me out of his house the morning after. The one time he had sex with someone while I was under the same roof as them, to my utter dismay. Fact is, there's a whole list of really really bad stuff he's done to me. So you wonder how I got to where I am? I'll explain.

It all started a couple of months ago with lingering stares. It couldn't have meant anything I'd told myself. Whenever he would have time in his crazy busy schedule, he would invite me over to his place or come over to mine. It was always just friendly visits, no motives intended whatsoever.

Every time his beautiful light blue eyes would look into my dark brown ones, I would feel myself melt. Despite how I tried ignoring that feeling.

Our visits to each other only increased with time and I'd eventually realized it wasn't 'when he had time' anymore but rather, he would sacrifice really important things in his life to make time to come and have mindless and stupid conversations with me.

He never told me this but I found out once when I'd mistakenly read a text he'd sent to one of the company's directors canceling on their meeting. The message said he had something really important he needed to attend to. I was that something really important.

This went on for months. It's still going now.

Furthermore, he let go of Emily. She was really good at her job yes, but he didn't want to have the sexual relationship he had with her anymore. I'd asked him why that was and he beat around the bush with the answer. He also said that she'd been starting to get too comfortable with said relationship resulting in him terminating her contract. With a good reference letter of course.

We haven't said anything to each other nor have we done anything beyond hugging.

I only realized how I really feel about him when Luke tried to kiss me the other day. I realized that there was only one person in this world I wanted to kiss, right then and there. That was confirmation for me.

He feels the same way, I don't doubt it one bit. For months he hasn't been with a woman. He hasn't told me this, I just know it. Jake is the most transparent person when it comes to his sex life. He claims he's too busy for that life now but of course that's just bs.

It feels like we're stuck though. Like we both know what's happening but we're afraid of pursuing it. For me it's partly because we've created such a beautiful bond that is our friendship, and I fear ruining that. But also, this is Jake we're talking about.

Probably the biggest man whore I know. Call me what you want but I'm afraid of getting my heart broken.

So even with the realization, I decide I'm not going to say anything. It's the best for the both of us anyways.

I've seen his attempt at being in a relationship and well, I don't want to be yet another victim. I'm also pretty sure he doesn't ever want to commit to someone in that way ever again. I'm pretty sure he's mentioned more than a few times that he just can't do this commitment thing.

I go up the stairs of the building I used to know too well. It looks so alien now. It's even more weird entering it from the visitor's parking.

He insisted I come here today to my annoyance. I told him I'll see him later but he damn near cried on the phone and that's why I'm in sweats and flip flops right now making my way to his office. I want him to see that I really didn't want to come here.

I wanted to have a relaxed off-work day at home.

"Mia you're late." Is the first thing he says when I finally reach his office and take a seat.

"You know I don't work for you anymore right?"
I still wonder how my heart fell in love with this asshole honestly.

"Well because of you, our food is cold. Mia you know how much I hate cold food." He really does. But also,

"I mean you could've just eaten. Nobody said you had to wait for me."
I want to be upset with him for saying that but the McDonald's bag on his desk has me forgiving him. I didn't realize how hungry I was until now.

I extend my hand to grab it but he takes it from my hand.

"Jake I swear to g.."

"Apologize."

"No!"

"Well I guess I'll have to go find someone to eat this"

"You wouldn't!"

Of course the idiot stands up with my food to go out the door so,

"Ok ok! I'm sorry I'm late."

Some days I just want to cut off his head and feed it to a bunch of wolves.

As soon as he gives me the bag, I waist no time to dig in. I don't even care to look ladylike as I eat and I'm guessing I look a mess because,

"Mia!"

He scolds but I ignore him. I'm hungry.

We sit there after finishing our food. I'm full and I can see he's full too.

And that's funny apparently because he starts laughing. Really hard and I just look at him like the weirdo he is.

"What is so funny??!"
I ask after a while.

"You - I just can't, I ... *laugs* - Marry me Mia."