Bruises [L.S]

Her

TW// self harm, eating disorders, abuse, depression, suicidal thoughts

Enjoy xx
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LOUIS POV:

It was Saturday, thankfully. Harry and I were playing football outside. It's been a bit awkward since the talk but we try not to make it.

"Oi common Curly!" I shouted across the lawn watching the cute tall boy miss his shot.

"Oh shut it boobear" he chiites back point at me

"Don't you dare" I marched over to him tackling him to the ground. He was laughing so hard, it was like music to my ears I smiled wide. We ended up laying on the grass side by sides watching the clouds pass by.

"Louis?" Harry asked

"Yeah?"

There was a lingering silence.

"Never mind" he got up and went inside of the house. I was confused but didn't ask into it. I followed behind him.

It had been a few hours since then, we played fifa, watched a few movies, finished up some homework and called the girls. 8:07pm my phone read.

"Harry I'm going for a drive. Clear my mind, I'll be back in a bit" I told him walking towards the door

"Do you mind picking up ice cream?" He sat up from the couch

I laughed, what a kid. "What kind?"

"Mint chocolate chip?" He asked with puppy eyes. God he was adorable

"Of course be back in a bit" with that I walked to my car.

I drove for about 30 minutes until I reached my destination. I got out of my car and walked along the gravel path.

"Hey" I said sitting down on the soft grass.

"Been a minute hasn't it, sorry I couldn't make it last week we were settling into a new place. A safe place."

I paused and took a deep breath picking at the grass.

"So, there's this guy. Harry- I like him, a lot and I don't know how to tell him. I know I know who knew I was into guys, I didn't either- but you support me right? Yeah I know you do." I smiled

"Remember the Harry I told you about? You know the one I beat up? Yeah him- same Harry. 2 weeks ago him and I got paired for the big brother programme, which means it's been two weeks since we have lived with him. I don't need to recap do I? I texted you about it... anyways, well I kissed him-Yeah I know I left that part out but I wanted to tell you in person."

I finished speaking sitting in silence looking at her. The moonlight never looked better on her. She asked me about Harry...

"Oh where do I start? He's got the most beautiful green eyes, they are the most perfect shade of emerald green. The way they sparkle in the light it makes you instantly smile. Oh his smile, he has the most perfect smile. When he smiles it's like being hit by the sun, it's such a bright, warm and welcoming smile yet it's still soft. Just like his hair, oh his curls. He doesn't like them so much but I think their gorgeous. I play with his hair a lot to make him feel a bit more confident with his curls. Which seems to help, but boy do I love his curls- and his personality. He's such a heart felt person. He definitely wears his heart on his sleeve but that's okay because I don't ever want to break his heart. I wish you are able to see how helpful he is. I know you are far away but I can visit one day. I know I said I'd be with you soon but I'm still settling in"

I felt tears come into my eyes.

"He knows by the way, about my wrists- and Mark of course. But remember when I texted you saying I couldn't find my razor. I'm quite sure he took it without me knowing. I told you about him helping me clean up the cuts on my face, well I saw him stick something in his back pocket. Must've been the razor. I found a pair of scissors tho. They don't work as well but they did the job- I know I should be doing that to myself you don't need to remind me but it's an addiction and I just can't stop. I've tried you know I have"

I stopped talking for a bit and sat in my own thoughts.... after a few minutes of silence I spoke again

"If you are going to ask me about my eating habits they have stayed the same- I know I need to eat but it's hard. Try having a voice in your head telling you you are fat and worthless every second of everyday. It's hard okay? I'm sure haz is going to catch on soon about it- but I'll just tell him I don't need to eat. I'm doing fine anyways, how many times have I passed out this week? Only 6 times, new record innit.... I know I know eat. But I'm never hungry- and the food will only make me fat....

you know Lottie still thinks I'm the reason you know? She still hates me for it. I'm the one who said to look out for the truck. Just because I was in the car doesn't mean I- never mind. I just wish Mark wasn't such an abusive drunk. Although it's been easier not having him around me or the girls.

Yes the girls are alright no need to worry. They are staying at Gabby's house until- yes I know single mum against 5 girls. She can manage, I mean I do to don't I?

And some- you what? Oh... you wanna know about the kiss? Alright then. Well I had just told him everything about that cunt- sorry I know language. That abusive drunk. I broke down crying again, the second time in the same day... he held me in his arms. I lifted my head out from under his and just kissed him. I don't know what came over me but I just kissed him- I know I was shocked too!

But the kiss, it was just so magical. Is it weird if I say it was like meant to be- no? Okay... well it felt like it was meant to be... like our lips fell together like two pieces in a puzzle. I felt a spark- no not weird either? Okay well I did. It was just so magical and it felt right. I haven't quite figured it all out yet, but I'll text you a soon as I know? Well I'm still kinda new at the whole liking a boy thing. Got any tips? I mean imma need some- you'll send me some? Alright thank you."

I sat up placing my head against her. A few tears rolled down my cheek stinging a bit.

"It's beautiful out tonight, the moonlight light looks good on you y'know. I'm being serious. You are one of the most gorgeous women I have met. And I just wish you could see that honestly. I've missed you

Oh my cooking's gotten a bit better, Harry has been teaching me. He knows his way around the kitchen, he started working at a bakery actually. Well he applied for the job. Im sure he will get it, he wanted to help me out with getting an apartment. You know for me and the girls. Which reminds me, I got the job at the tattoo shop. Gave Harry a couple- yes he's only sixteen but I got my first one at sixteen- yes I know but- his mum said she didn't mind ha! I get good tips and a decent pay- yeah I'm aiming a year max. By next September. And yes I see the other girls all the time, they've missed you too"

I checked my phone 9:47pm

"Shit- sorry language I know" I chuckled but I should be getting back to Harry, he's waiting for his ice cream- it'll take another 45 minutes to get back then.

"I'm sorry to cut it short, I'll see you next week and maybe I can see you for good one day... or not I'm getting better. We can put a maybe in that" I got up from my sitting position and kissed the top of her head.

"See you soon mum, I love you"

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A/N: shorter chapter but uh yea:)