Beneath My Exterior

An Awkward Welcoming ~Cole

'Oh, crap...' I hiss, as soon as I've excited the T-Chamber. As anticipated, the sudden burst of shock sends my monitor buzzing like crazy, but my head had been filled with rainbows and fluffy white bunnies from the beginning. In other words, as soon as the numbers went down, I forced them back up again.

Think happy thoughts, Cole. You know you can do it.

You're probably wondering why I just went off like that, and relax— anyone would've been thinking the same thing after witnessing this situation. Well, everything's as perfect as it's always been, for starters. The underground is quiet today, as it usually is on a Saturday. Most Nazarees wind up in the human world on the weekend. Some even have part-time jobs up there. Everyone else tends to stick to their colour sectors though, where they're all in the same boat as each other.

The T-Chamber station is normal as ever, too. I'm so used to the long line of glass cylinders and sandstone pathways into the Nazaree version of a 'Central Station' that I barely bat an eyelid. Of course, I couldn't have batted an eyelid anyway, even if I wanted to. It'd shrink me before I could even stop myself.

My point is, there's one flaw in my perfect underground home, and no: it isn't the indigo wandering around the place with a white cane, or the young group of greens kicking each other in the manhood to make themselves shrink.

It's Andrew Lawson's robot, frozen and unblinking on the spot...

...with Janet hovering inches from his face in her jet pack, waving frantically in front of his eyes.

'Janet!' I call out in my usual monotone, jogging towards them. Dropping Ava into a park bench nearby, I frown at the sight of the frozen robot before us, wondering why it isn't moving. Surely the great Andrew Lawson wouldn't have a malfunction problem, right?

'Cole?' Janet's worried expression flickers to me, and I hold out my hand calmly for her to land on. The tiny woman and founder of the underground shuts off her jet pack and falls into my hand, brushing off her black tube skirt. She gestures to Andrew's robot. 'I don't know what's wrong... I swear he just seized up on me after calling me his...' Her eyes widen and she sits down hard on my steady palm, head in her hands. 'It's him, isn't it.' She mumbles, going into hysterics. 'Shit! If I'd have had my glasses with me I would've recognised him! That boy- he's been all over the papers here... Everyone knows who he is...'

I reach down to gently stroke her back with my index finger. 'It's alright, Janet. You didn't know. It's been ten years, hasn't it? I'm sure he looks different now.' My wrist buzzes, and Janet glances at my monitor worriedly.

'Now look what I've done!' She cries, clearly distressed. 'First, I didn't recognise my own son and now you're getting low...'

'Hey!' I interrupt, retracting my hand from her back. 'Don't get upset. My levels only dropped because I'm confused,' I point to Andrew's still frozen form with my thumb, 'about why he's not responding.'

Moving Janet gently to my left shoulder, I walk up to Andrew Jr. and nudge him in the ribs. The robot rocks sideways a fraction, but merely snaps back into place, remaining as unresponsive as ever. I try to bottle up my confusion as I inspect the motionless contraption.

'Andrew? Can you hear me?' I call out, keeping my voice low and steady.

It's dead silent for a few minutes, Janet sobbing to herself in the background, and then...

'Shit. Did I just faint?' Andrew's robot says in a pained voice. He blinks twice and turns his head towards Janet and I... only to let out a loud gasp, which turns quickly into a grumble. 'Ohhhh. It's you.'