notebook • taekook

18

this was a mistake.

clutched to his chest was his personal notebook, pages ripped with slurs written all over them.

what did I do wrong?

jungkook's head fell against the brick wall as he sobbed endlessly.

he just loved a boy who didn't love him the same way. what's so wrong with that?

he wiped away the tears as he flipped to the page with his drawing on it. it was a drawing of Taehyung's perfect face. every detail was spot on, showing the beauty of the Kim Taehyung, the boy who he loved so much.

the urge got stronger every single day, yet he couldn't fulfill the urge. jungkook could feel the smoothness of Taehyung's hair against his fingertips, the smell of cinnamon coming from his cologne, eyes filled with warmth and actual love looking right back at him.

he wanted it all.

he wanted the little dates at the park, or random nights where they'd go on drives down the highway drinking monster and tea while listening to music, or the soft kisses against his neck while they watched the sun set, or the feeling of warmth and safety engulfing him as he shared the same bed with his lover. yet everything he dreamt of seemed out of his grasp, as always.

jungkook watched as the sky slowly dimmed. the light from the sun was slowly replaced by streetlights.

he slowly walked home, ignoring the fact that there was a car following him the whole way, headlights turned off as it slowly followed the teenage boy.