Accountables (121-130)
And so Jimbo of the hazel eyes said unto his people with sharp words, ‘O, people of mine, know ye not the wrath of Jimbo? I am indeed a badass with a temper; know well my likes and dislikes and compliment me sometimes; it’s always nice to be complimented.’ And so his people agreed verily; indeed, Jimbo had a hefty temper. And lo that Jimbo continued, ‘and o people of mine, why then have I found the temple of Jimbo spray-painted with a giant penis? What manner of man blasphemes in such a way?’ and so the people began fidgeting in fear; all but one man and, indeed, he was the most hated of men. And so Jimbo addressed him thusly and spoke with sharp words, ‘O, blasphemer. You are indeed the most hated of men. Why did you taint my sacred temple with a dick drawing?’ to which the man replied, ‘O, Jimbo, of the black foot, I did what I did because I wanted to impress everyone. I have no friends or hobbies. No-one dares touch me or stand next to me,’ and so Jimbo recognised the man, verily, and spoke his mind, ‘is your name called the troll-servant?’ to which the troll-servant replied, ‘verily,’ and so Jimbo continued, ‘foolish creature. I will indeed punish you excessively by taking away that which you value most,’ and so Jimbo, the tall and brave, took away the troll-servant’s eyes so that he never again could read a book or restaurant menu and so the troll-servant cried out in anguish, ‘O, Jimbo, you have done me the worst punishment, surely, by stealing from me my favourite pleasure; before now, my only friends I found in books and such; verily, you are indeed the greatest and harshest punisher,’ and lo, that Jimbo of the hazel eyes was glad for the compliment as all followers of Jimbo know well, that Jimbo enjoys compliments; it’s always nice to be complimented, and so Jimbo called back the troll-servant and spoke his mind, ‘O, ugly troll-servant, you are indeed a pathetic specimen,’ to which the troll-servant replied, ‘O, Jimbo, call me not with your sweet compliments; I am too flattered,’ and so Jimbo continued thusly, ‘O, foul troll, you have pleased me verily with your handsome compliments and so I shall, with quickest swiftness, return to you your eyes but carve a scar on one of them to remind you of My gift of sight unto you whenever you cry in pain or fear,’ and so Jimbo returned unto the troll-servant his eyes and carved a scar into one of them, just as he had promised. And so the troll-servant gave many thanks for the mercy of Jimbo and, with quickest swiftness, washed the walls of the temple of Jimbo; so colourful was the dick-drawing.
