Rental Boyfriend [NAMJIN]

Chapter 20: Break Up

Seokjin hung his head low, in shame, as if was facing the consequences of a forbidden love, which was exactly what he was doing. Except for the fact that his boss did not yet know anything, his boss did not have any confirmation yet, he didn't have shit. Seokjin thought that maybe, just maybe he was able to lie his way out of it.

"Are you in a relationship, Seokjin-san?" Seokjin looked into his boss' eyes and shook his head, allowing his words to speak before he could make a decision for himself.

"No sir. I understand your rules on relationships and the boundaries within. I would never dishonour the company in such a way." Seokjin couldn't help but feel guilty, for the lying he had done. He couldn't help but feel selfish for wanting both.

Was it selfish to want both love and financial stability? Because in his industry, it was one or the other, he supposed. People like him were a liability. Secrets were a liability, lying was a burden, for both parties. Seokjin saw the greed behind the rule, however for so long he had ignored it, in hopes that eventually he would be able to get around it, but now? He was lying his way out, a shameful position to be in if he was being honest with himself.

"Are you sure?" Seokjin contemplated for a mere moment, 'Am I selfish for wanting both? Am I greedy for lying my way out?' He looked out of the window, then back down, Namjoon's beautiful smile in his mind. 'If greed allows me to keep that beautiful smile, then it's greed that shall keep me here.'

"Yes sir, I am positive." The boss nodded, and leaned back in his chair, almost too comfortable in his stance, as if he knew something Seokjin didn't. Seokjin let no emotion show on his face, but then again, this expression was common for him when dealing with business, so it didn't seem out of character.

"The things I've seen through my window state otherwise. The things my sons have said in passing state otherwise. I don't appreciate you lying to me, Seokjin-san." Seokjin's eyes widened, for the few minutes he had been in the office, he had grown comfortable with the situation, not thinking of the game the boss could be playing. Not thinking of the tone and attitude in detail.

'He knows.' Seokjin's heart fell, as did his hopes and dreams for the selfish greed he had previously desired.

"You know..." Seokjin whispered, angst and hurt tugging at his heartstrings. The boss nodded solemnly, not angry, but disappointed and pissed.

"Yes, I do. Seokjin-san, you've adhered to the rules for a very long time, why is it now that you break them?" Seokjin didn't understand one thing, just one. Despite the situation being very clear in intention and information being stated explicitly, Seokjin had one question.

"The blinds are always closed when I'm at Namjoon's, and you only moved in this week. Your sons came over yesterday, but we didn't say anything apart from our names. You're not smart enough to put the pieces together, so how? How? If you're lying to me as well sir, then that's a contradiction. You don't like contradictions." The boss actually chuckled at that, resuming his normal persona.

"You're right, Seokjin-san. Ayaka-san says a lot after a couple of drinks, doesn't she?" Seokjin's eyes widened once more, and his nose flared. 'Ayaka-san, of course she did. Wasn't she on my side?' Seokjin then sighed softly.

"Which do you choose?" The boss asked bluntly. "This affair of yours, or the company?" Seokjin's face then went emotionless, he leaned back in his seat and looked out of the window. 'What would be the circumstances for each?'

"What would be the hypothetical scenario for each?" Seokjin asked carefully, growing more and more heartbroken by the second. The boss looked at him with pity, smiling almost sadly.

"If you choose your partner, then you are to quit the company and you will be sued. The price will be equal to every paycheck you've earned and every resource you have paid for. If you choose the company, you are to cut off all contact with this partner, if he's a customer at the company, then you are to have someone else with you at all times. You will also suffer a demotion. So, Seokjin-san, which do you choose?" Seokjin inhaled deeply, 'I can't afford the fine, and I can't get sued. I'm rich, yes, but I've worked here for a long time, that's basically going bankrupt. I'm sorry Namjoon, but I'm going to have to be a bit selfish. I love you, but I think that maybe now wasn't the best time.'

"I'll break up with him." Seokjin whispered brokenly, not bothering to look up. The boss grinned triumphantly, as if he expected said end result.

"Good." Seokjin felt like crying, he felt like screaming, but he didn't, instead, he left. He walked to the front door and briskly walked to his car, fearing if he went any slower, he'd break down in tears on the street. His car door was slammed and he wiped a stray tear from his cheek.

His finger hovered over the call button on Namjoon's contact, he was very much torn between the two choices he had been given. Namjoon was selfless, loving, he always sacrificed himself for those he cared for most, and what was Seokjin doing? Sacrificing the one person he truly loved for financial stability?

Seokjin always imagined him and Namjoon together as a dream come true, but in that moment he realised something. Dreams don't come true, that was why they were what they were. Dreams were a moonlit fantasy, dreams were flowers and sunshine, dreams were the paradise you had come to imagine as reality, dreams blurred you, they tore you apart. Dreams didn't come true. Seokjin and Namjoon were a fallen fantasy, something that once seemed achievable was now far, far, away.

So, Seokjin pressed the call button, and he held the phone to his ear, near silent sobs falling through his lips. Namjoon answered after a few rings, the line silent for a few seconds before Seokjin spoke quietly.

"I'm sorry." Seokjin's raw voice spoke, another sob falling from delicate lips. Seokjin looked up, hair ruffling from the friction against the car seat.

"Seokjinnie?" Namjoon's voice was gentle, sad, however not pitying. Seokjin could feel the tears soak onto his cheeks, he could feel them gushing down, yet, he was near silent. He looked to the office building and he reminded himself of what was to happen. He couldn't lose everything, though he may not have known it then, but Namjoon was his everything.

"We have to break up." Seokjin's tone had been stripped of the previous emotion it held, continuing to stare into the company building as if he were in debt to it.

--

Namjoon had felt as if his world had just grown colder, and as if his heart had just frozen along with it. He felt as if he had broken to pieces, just from that statement.

"You chose them." It dawned upon Namjoon that Seokjin had chosen them, over him. Seokjin had chosen the job he didn't even enjoy, over him, the only passion Seokjin ever had. Tears filled in Namjoon's eyes unwillingly, he wanted to demand Seokjin to explain himself, but he couldn't bring himself to speak.

"I'm sorry. I love you." Were Seokjin's last words before hanging up, letting his phone slip from his hands to the carpet below and sobbing into his hands at his lost love.

"What have I done?"

"What did I do?" Namjoon asked himself, his cries disappearing into thin air. His sorrow was unexplainable, the reality hadn't fully hit him yet, however he did have a grasp on what was to come. His heartbreak was not able to be explained through words, nor were the emotions he was currently feeling.

"Seokjin..." The name fell off his lips as it did so many times before, however not in pleasure nor bribery. Now, he let the heartbreak consume him, the heartbreak creeped into the happiest of memories, into the tiniest of objects, he was consumed.

Seokjin had made his choice, and he couldn't go back, no matter how regretful he felt, no matter how much pain he was in. Namjoon had placed the blame onto himself, not wanting to further destroy what was once a lovely dream.

Seokjin and Namjoon were a dream. In the end, they hadn't come true.  

Author's Notes: So many people will hate me for this lmao